Survivor! Duelist Style!
by DJ Shortstop Clue
Summary: 16 Duelists are trapped on a deserted island... but only one has the chance to win 3 million bucks and a treasure chest of rare cards... but can they do it without killing each other? Rated M for langauge! STORY COMPLETED!
1. And So It Begins

Hey whats up? This is my first Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan fic! I got another one in mind, but first let me get this one out of the open! I hope you enjoy it! I love Yu-Gi-Oh!... Survivor is… ok… if its on, ill probably watch it, but now its time to merge the two, but unlike some of the other people who did this, I have to be different and take mine in a different direction! I hope u like it!

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! nor do I own Survivor

**Two Tribes**

_**Pootietang Tribe… Gazonga Tribe**_

**16 Bastards**

_**Shows each character with a goofy grin on their face… except for Kaiba**_

**This is….**

_**Survivor: Outwit, Outplay, Outlast!**_

_Ladies and Gentlemen, Welcome to Survivor! 16 Duelists have been sent to a Deserted Island for a chance to win 3 million dollars… and ALL the rarest cards ever made!_

"WOOOO! YEAH!"

A hoot was heard off camera coming from Weevil, followed by a smacking sound.

Jeff Probst enters and introduces everyone.

"How are you doing, Survivors! As you know, you all will be stuck on a deserted island until there's a lone survivor! I'm Jeff Probst and I will be your host" Probst turns to the Camera. "Now, lets introduce our Survivors…"

**_From the Pootietang Tribe…_**

_Yugi Muto, Joey Wheeler, Tristan Taylor, Tea Gardner, Bakura Ryou, Duke Devlin, Mai Valentine, and Mako Tsunami!_

_**From the Gazonga Tribe..**_

_Seto Kaiba, Mokuba Kaiba, Maximillion Pegasus, Rex Raptor, Weevil Underwood, Bonz, Marik Ishtar, and Odion! _

Jeff spoke up again. "Ok Survivors, you have an hour to get set up, then meet back here for you Immunity Challenge!

_And so, the cameras fade out, then fade back in_

_**Rex Raptor: Gazonga Tribe**_

"Alright, so check this shit out… Pegasus is already starting to piss me off! Were all setting up with the bad ass survival mansion kit that Kaiba brought, and He's all asking me all these questions about Interior designing and shit!"

Scene cuts to inside the mansion, where Rex is posting up dinosaur pictures up in his room. Pegasus comes in wearing a pair of tight ass slacks with no shirt on. "Be honest Rexy-boy… do these pants make my butt look big?" Rex turns around, then whips his head back, blind from the scene. "AAHH! DUDE, COVER UP! YOUR BALLS ARE SHOWIN'!"

Scene cuts back to Rex sitting on a log with his left leg on his right one, doing his camera time. "I was like, "DUDE! I DO NOT WANNA SEE YOUR SCHLONG! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY ROOM! Now I don't give two drops of drops of dino piss what the next challenge is, but whatever it is, I am SOOO gonna fuck Pegasus up on it! Count on it!" Rex then gets up and walks away, muttering, "Sick fuck…"

**One Hour later…**

Jeff steps forward. "OK teams, its time for your first challenge! Does everyone have a duel disk?" Both Tribes hold their arms up and waves around their Duel Disks. "OK, great! Now you will each draw one card from your decks, and it will be a 2-Tribe battle! The first team to lose ALL their monsters loses the Immunity Challenge! Magic and Trap cards are forbidden in this challenge! Survivors ready!

Each team member lines up side by side. Yugi closes his eyes as the Millennium Puzzle shines bright.

"YU – GI – OOOOOOOOHHHHHH!"

Yami Yugi leans forward and turns to his team. "Does everybody remember the special Pootietang Strategy?" Each member of the Pootietang tribe nodded their heads with huge smirks on their faces. Yami Yugi then looked at Kaiba with his trademark clever smirk. Kaiba however just cocked his eyebrow. "Special Pootietang Strategy? I don't know what kind of lame ass strategy he came up with in that feeble little brain of his, but there's NO WAY it'll stand up to my Blue-Eyes White Dragon!"

"DUEL!"

Odion draws. "I SUMMON MYSTICAL BEAST SERKET!"

Marik draws. "I SUMMON THE WINGED DRAGON OF…"

Jeff runs up to Marik and slaps the God Card out of his hand. "Eygptian God Cards are strictly forbidden in this Challenge! Marik stamped his foot in the sand. "ARE YOU FUCKIN' KIDDIN' ME? WHAT THE HELL KIND OF GAY ASS DUEL IS THIS?" Jeff turned and walked away, completely ignoring Marik. "Continue the challenge!" Marik pulls out his Millennium Rod. "I should take control of your mind and have you cut your own friggin nuts off!" He put his rod away and draws his card. "I FUCKIN' SUMMON REVIVAL JAM!"

Bonz draws. "I SUMMON SNAKE HAIR!""

Weevil draws. "I SUMMON INSECT QUEEN!"

Rex draws. "I SUMMON TWO-HEADED KING REX!"

Pegasus draws. "I SUMMON BLUE-EYES TOON DRA—"

Kaiba interrupts him in mid-summon. "OH THE DAMN YOU ARE! YOU BETTER PUT THAT SHIT BACK BEFORE I SHOVE MY FOUR HUNDRED DOLLAR BOOT UP YOUR ASS!" Pegasus turns to Kabia. "You promise?" he said, smiling. Kaiba simply shook his head, giving him a cold stare. "Very well… you win Kaiba-boy. I SUMMON RELINQUISHED!" Rex shook his head. "You created this shit and THAT'S the best you can come up with?"

Mokuba draws. "I SUMMON THREE-HEADED GEEDO!"

Kaiba draws. "AND I SUMMON THE BLUE-EYES WHITE DRAGON!"

Jeff stared at the army of duel monsters. "WHAT AN ARMY? HOW WILL THE POOTIETANG TRIBE RETAILIATE!"

Mako draws. "I SUMMON LEGENDARY FISHERMAN!"

Mai draws. "I SUMMON HARPY'S PET DRAGON!"

Duke draws. "I SUMMON ORGOTH THE RELENTLESS!"

Bakura draws. "I SUMMON RIGHT LEG OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"

Tea draws. "I SUMMON RIGHT ARM OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"

Tristan draws. "I SUMMON LEFT LEG OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"

Joey draws. "I SUMMON LEFT ARM OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"

Yugi draws. "AND I SUMMON EXODIA… THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"

Kaiba's eyes widened. "NO WAY! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKIN KIDDING ME!" Yugi pointed towards the Gazonga Tribe.

"EXODIA… OBLITERATE!"

And with that, Exodia shot out a huge beam, completely destroying all the Gazonga Tribe's monsters and sending each member flying completely off camera. Jeff stared at the scene in total amazement.

"Uhh….. THE POOTIETANG TRIBE WINS THE IMMUNITY CHALLENGE!"

Each team member hooted and hollered as they celebrated their victory. Jeft was then seen hauling ass towards where the Gazonga Tribe landed. "Ok Gazongas, meet back at the campsite for a tribal meeting to decided who gets voted off." Kaiba got up, pissed off. "Yugi.. one of these days, I am going to fuck you up… just really FUCK YOU UP!" Odion was still face down in the dirt. "Medic…"

**Later that night…**

the Gazonga Tribe all met at the Tribal meeting. It was a campsite with tiki lamps, a voting box, and the whole island scene. Jeff spoke up. "OK Gazongas, since you lost the Immunity Challenge, you will have to vote who you want kicked off the Island, **FROM YOUR TRIBE**!" He said the last part glaring at Kaiba. "FUCK! I thought I could get Yugi's ass!" Jeff turned to Odion. "Odion, your frist." Odion walks up to the voting box, scribbles a name down, drops it in, then walks back. This went on til everyone was done voting. Jeff walks over to the box.

"Ok, ill tally up the votes… one vote for Pegasus… one vote for Weevil… another vote for… PEGASUS' GAY ASS… I wonder who wrote that one?" Rex stared up into the sky with a huge grin on his face. Jeff continued to count the votes. "Another for Pegasus… and … WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!"

The vote read, "JEFF IS GAY! HAHAHAHAHA!"

Jeff balled up the vote and tossed it over his shoulder. "Ill just pretend I never saw that one." Marik wore a huge grin on his face, trying to keep from laughing. _I think he got MY vote! Hahaha!_ He thought. Jeff looked up. "Alright, the tribe has spoken. Pegasus my friend, your gone! Please bring me your torch." Pegasus picks up his torch and hands it to Jeff, who then takes the torch behinds some bushes and the sound of unzipping pants are heard, followed by a disturbing sound of pee. He comes back and tosses the burned out torch over his shoulders. "Hit the bricks Pegasus. As for the rest of you, return to your camp and rest up for tomorrow." Pegasus stood there in awe. "Me… gone… you cant do this to me! IM MAXIMILLION PEGASUS, DAMMIT! YOU HAVENT SEEN THE LAST OF ME!" He then stormed off cameras.

The Scene shifts over to the familiar spot where Rex is sitting on his log doing his camera time. "SERVES YOU RIGHT PEGASUS, YOU GAY ASS PIECE OF SHIT!"

**THERE ARE STILL 7 MORE SURVIVORS LEFT ON THE GAZONGA TRIBE AS THEY ALL GET READY FOR ANOTHER DAY OF BULLSHIT… WILL THEY OUTPLAY THE POOTIETANG TRIBE TOMRROW? FIND OUT NEXT EPISODE OF SURVIVOR… YU-GI-OH! STYLE!**

**PLEASE REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! HEY, IM EVEN OPEN FOR SUGGUESTIONS! WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE HAPPEN AND VOTED OFF! LET ME KNOW AND ILL USE THEM IN UPCOMING EPISODES/CHAPTERS!**


	2. Much Ado about Tea

**I'm currently fixing this story so that its not done in script form. Hey this was my first story, so I was a little new at this. What was I thinking, right? Lol! I hope you enjoy the 6****th**** anniversary update!**

_**Survivor: Yu-Gi-Oh! Style! **_

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

_Last time on Survivor, Maximillion Pegasus from the Gazonga Tribe was voted off the island. He had 28 seconds to say what he thought of the situation before he got tossed off the island, and heres what he had to say:_

The scene suddenly cuts to someone holding up a huge framed picture of Pegasus with the mouth part cut out and someone else's mouth is seen in the mouth hole. (clearly, u can tell someone Is holding the picture up). Rex Raptor stood behind the portrait, and began to speak in a really gay, slurry voice. "I got voted off, because im fuckin' gay and I looooove boys… especially that guy, Tristan from the Pootietang Tribe… he has such a cute little butt… on I could just…"

Tristan could suddenly be seen in the background walking by eating a banana. He overhears what Rex was saying, and saw what he was doing. Anger suddenly flared in his body as he squished his banana in between his hand.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!! I'LL KILL YOU!!" He shouted.

"GOTTA GO!!" Rex shouted. He tossed the picture of Pegasus off camera, then took off running, with Tristan hot on his heels.

_OK… that was NOT the footage… whos been fuckin with the footage! Dammit I'm not paid enough to…_

The REAL footage of Pegasus is played.

"I cant believe those bastards stabbed me in the back and voted ME off the show! ME! OF ALL PEOPLE! They could have voted for that douche bag, Weevil, but NOOOO, they picked me! But its ok! I will have my revenge! Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date with Brandon from Survivor 3…" Little cartoon hearts appeared over Pegasus' head, due to camera effects. The scene suddenly cuts inside to the technicians van, where Joey could be seen sitting inside with a few tech heads. He gave the camera a thumbs up with a huge grin, then the scene shifted back to Pegasus. "GOTTA GO!!!" Pegasus said as he scurried off the camera.

_So who will get voted off next? Find out right now, as our Survivors awaken for a new day!_

**Location: Pootietang Tribe Campsite - 6:14am**

Yugi wakes up then looks around. He walks over to Duke, who is sound asleep. He reaches down and starts nudging him.

"Duke! Duke! Duke, wake up! We have to find food for the others! You said you would help, remember? DUKE!"

"…get some… lovin… from… Grand Master D…" Duke muttered in his sleep. He then let out a little snort.

"…What?" Yugi said, confused. Suddenly the Millennium Puzzle began to flash. "_Yugi… Let me take over." _Came a voice from the puzzle. "Ok." Yugi said. He then closed his eyes and his body flashed along with the Millinnium Puzzle, then grew a few inches taller.

"**YU – GI – OOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!"**

Yami Yugi stands tall with that bad ass look on his face. He then placed his hand on Duke's forehead, then closed his eyes.

"What the fuck could you be dreaming about that has you so sound asleep?" he asked. He then began to concentrate as he peered into Duke's dream. A vision of a night club called "Devlin Nights" appeared. Inside, Duke is sitting there in the V.I.P. room with a bunch of random girls.

"DUKE DUKE!! YOUR SO CUTE!!" they all cheered.

"I know, I know!" Duke said with a huge goofy grin on his face.

"OH Duke! I love YOU! Not that queer Tristan!" Serenity said.

"Please dance with me Duke!" Misty (from Pokemon) said.

"No Duke! Dance with me!" Sakura (from Cardcaptors) said.

Tifa Lockheart (from Final Fantasy 7) appeared and pulled Duke away from the girls. "No, he wants to dance with a REAL woman… Like me! Isnt that right, Duke?" she said, rubbing his face.

Duke, turning red in the face, began to get flustered.

"You know what? I PICK YOU ALL!! Come on babes!!" Duke said. He lead the girls out to the dance floor. He then looked up at the D.J. and pointed at him, giving him "the word".

"YO YO YO! A SPECIAL SHOUT OUT GOES OUT TO MA BOY DUKE DEVLIN, KEEPIN IT REAL, PIMPIN IT ALL OVER THE WORLD! THIS ONE'S FOR YOU, DUKE MAN!" the D.J. said over the microphone. The song then began to play:

_Go, go, go, go  
Go, go, go shawty  
It's your birfday  
We gon' party like it's yo birfday  
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birfday  
And you know we don't give a fuck  
It's not your birfday!_

_You can find me in the club, bottle full of bub  
Look mami I got the X if you into taking drugs  
I'm into having sex, I ain't into making love  
So come give me a hug if you into to getting rubbed_

All the girls began to freak dance on Duke, with Tifa grinding her ass up and down on his crotch. Everybody in the club is chanting Duke's name. As he dances, he's seen holding a bottle of Smirnoff in his hand.

The scene suddenly cuts back to Yami Yugi as he takes his hand off Duke's forehead. He put his hand over his eyes and shook his head.

"Only in Dukes dreams would some shit like that ever happen." He muttered. He walked away from the camp, returning moments later with a huge bucket of water. He proceeded to pouring it over Duke's head. "WAKE YO' BITCH ASS UP!!!!" he shouted.

Duke jumped up from his sleeping position, flailing his arms about wildly. "WHAT THE FUCK, MAN?! WHAT THE FUCK!! I WAS HAVING A BAD ASS DREAM!! WHAT THE SHIT DID YOU WAKE ME UP FOR?!"

"Because your skinny ass promised to help me gather food this morning." Yami said. He then grabbed Duke by his ponytail and pulled him behind him. "Now let's go! Devlin Nights… bitch please."

"OUCH!!! OWWW!!! DAMMIT!! LET GO!!! OUCH!! COME ON MAN, THIS SHIT HURTS!!! OUCH!!!" Duke shouted as Yami pulled him along.

Bakura, who awoke in Yami Bakura form, shot an eye open. "SHUT THE FUCK UP!! WAKE ME UP AGAIN AND I'M SENDING YOUR PUSSY ASSES TO THE SHADOW REALM!!" he then fell back asleep.

**Location: Gazonga Tribe Campsite: 7:24am**

Meanwhile, on the other side of the island, the Gazonga Tribe relaxes in the backyard of the mini-mansion that Kaiba brought to the island. Outside is a huge patio complete with a swimming pool, cabanas, beach umbrellas, and a karaoke machine!

Kaiba reclined in a long lawn chair under an umbrella wearing sunglasses and in his usual clothes while talking on his cell phone. "…Hell yeah! The Gazonga Tribe WAKES UP partying! Now that that bitch Pegasus is gone, its gonna be smooth sailing from here and… what was that? … Oh don't worry about those guys. If they know what's good for them, they'll stay the fuck out of my way. Well hey, I have to get going. I gotta plan on how I'm gonna break my foot off in Yugi's ass today and... what? … oh fuck you! Today is the day Yugi gets his.. I SAY THAT SHIT EVERYDAY?! FUCK YOU!! THIS TIME I MEAN THAT SHIT!! I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER!! BYE!!" Kaiba pressed the hang up button on his phone and threw it behind him. After all, being a teen millionaire, he can afford to easily get another one.

Rex Raptor stood on a little stage singing karaoke with Marik, Weevil, and Bonz sitting in front of it. He cleared his voice and began to sing:

"_**Annie's 12 years old in two more she'll be a whore  
Nobody ever told her it's the wrong way  
Don't be afraid with the quickness you get laid  
for your family gets paid  
It's the wrong way I gave her all that I had to give  
I'm gonna make it hard to live  
Big salty tears running down her chin  
And it ruins up her make up**_

_**A cigarette pressed between her lips  
But I'm staring at her tits  
It's the wrong way  
Strong if I can but I am only a man  
So I take her to the can  
The only family she ever had**_

_**Was her 7 horny brothers and her drunk-ass dad  
He needed money so he put her on the street  
Everything was going fine till the day that she met me  
Happy are you sad, wanna shoot your dad  
I'll do anything i can it's the wrong way  
We talked all night and tried to make it right  
Believe me shit was tight  
It was the wrong way"**_

Marik, into the song, struck a lighter and began to wave it into the air. "WOOOOOOO!!! SUBLIME RULES!!"

Bonz however, sat there in deep thought. "…_Maybe I'll sing some Rob Zombie… yeah… RZ Rocks!"_

Weevil, being Weevil, sat there bored. "THIS SONG SUCKS!! SING THE BEATLES, DAMMIT!!" He shouted.

Rex stopped in mid song. "WHAT'D YOU SAY, BITCH?!" Weevil stood up and flipped him off. Rex threw down the microphone, then jumped off the stage and tackles Weevil, repeatedly striking him in the head. Marik then jumped up and started to stomp on Weevil. Bonz looked around, then climbed on the stage and picked up the microphone.

"_**YEAAAAAH, my Durango, goin' 95…"**_

Kaiba raised his sunglasses from his eyes and shook his head as he watched the fight. "Those faggots better not fuck up my equipment. I'll hand out a smackdown 100 times worse than the one I'm gonna give to Yugi!"

However, in the pool, Odion and Mokuba was playing a traditional pool game.

"Marco!" Mokuba shouted as he covered his eyes.

From across the pool, Odion attempted to run to the the edge of the pool to jump out. "POLO!" He shouted.

Mokuba quickly turned around and pointed at Odion with a huge grin on his face. "FISH OUT OF WATER!!! I WIN!!"

"… how the fuck did I get stuck doin' this shit?!" Odion sulked.

Kaiba looked at his watch and noticed what time it was. "Hey. HEY!! Get dressed, bitches!! Its time to go to that stupid Immunity thing!"

Everybody scrambled to go inside to get changed, sans Weevil, who laid there twitching.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Marik Ishtar: Gazonga Tribe**

"I don't know who the hell made Kaiba the leader of this tribe, but if he keeps bossin us around and calling us names, his boney ass is gonna take a one-way trip to the Shadow Realm!"

He looked off camera to hear the stage manager say something to him.

"What! … OOOHH, that… Yeah, I started stompin' on Weevil while Rex was kickin his ass! NOBODY TALKS ABOUT SUBLIME, DAMMIT!"

Marik then proceeded to put his face directly into the camera. "NOBODY! AND IF YOU DO, ITS THE SHADOW REALM FOR YOU, BUCKO!**"**

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 8:46am**

Each member of the Pootietang Tribe is eating a huge breakfast buffet… pancakes, waffles, bacon, eggs, hash browns, orange juice, milk, all sorts of exotic cheeses… the works! Except for Mako however… he has fish, oysters, and… fruit punch.

Mai stuffed her face with eggs, then washed it down with orange juice. "Where did you guys get all this food? I mean, I heard we were going to be on a deserted island, miles away from nowhere, but here it looks like we just walked out of fuckin Denny's!"

Yami Yugi and Duke smiled at each other.

"Well you see Mai, we had caught a few rabbits and were walking back to the campsite, but Yugi noticed a transport coptor fly over us a drop this huge crate down. It said "To the CBS producers"… so Yugi took a peak inside and noticed it was full of all this food! So we took it upon ourselves to…"

"DEVLIN, THAT'S ENOUGH!"Yami shouted as he slapped Duke on the side of the head with a syrup drenched pancake. He then nudged his head towards a camera zoomed DIRECTLY at Duke.

Duke's eyes began to widen."Oh shit on a stick… LIKE I SAID MAI, WE MET SOME MAGICAL GNOMES, AND WE TOLD THEM WE WERE VERY HUNGRY, AND THEY MADE US THIS MEAL!"

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Yugi Muto: Pootietang Tribe Leader**

"Duke's ass is gonna get us into some SERIOUS shit one of these days. They weren't gnomes… everyone knows gnomes cant cook for shit! THEY WERE ELVES!"

Yami then looked off camera.** "ELVES DAMMIT!!!"**

**(END)**

Tea suddenly stood up and slammed her fists down on the table. "I cant believe you stole this food! The producers work hard to try to put on a show for the world and THIS is how you repay them?"__She then pushed her food away.__"I will have NO part of this!"

Bakura (aka Ryou) stared at Tea's plate. "Um… Tea… if your not gonna eat your French toast… may I have them?"

"**NO!"** She shouted. She took Bakura's plate away, followed by Joey's._"_We are gonna give this food back to CBS RIGHT NOW!"

Joey closed his eyes tightly, trying to concel his anger. "Tea… you have less than ten seconds to put that plate back where you found it or I'm gonna beat the CRAP out of you!"

Completely ignoring Joey, Tea took everyone's breakfast (sans Mako's) and threw it into the crate. "Now, we'll leave this food in the crate and wait until CBS comes for it"

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Tea Gardner: Pootietang Tribe**

"If I ruined everyone's breakfast, I'm sorry! But were susposed to be roughing it! Mako caught his own food! So we should be doing the same thing!" She crossed her arms. _"_It's the right thing to do… after all…"

The cameras suddenly cut off as she went into her friendship speech, then rose in on Joey.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Joey Wheeler : Pootietang Tribe**

"Tea had no right to do dat shit! I only had like 12 pancakes and like 3 pounds of eggs and like" He started to count his fingers_. "_36 slices of bacon… There was still more to eat too! OOOHHH THAT BITCH IS GONNA PAY!" He quickly stood up and put his face into the camera. "YUGI!! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!!! YOU BETTER GET YOUR BITCH IN CHECK!!!"

Everyone but Mako is staring in disbelief as Tea sealed the crate up.

"Tell me this isn't happening…" Tristan said, eyes open wide.

"I wish I could…" said a teary-eyed Bakura.

"**I HATE YOU TEA! I SWEAR I HATE YOU!"** shouted an emotional Joey

Mako looked over at the others, pulling a fishbone out his mouth. "Anybody want some! Plenty to go around! HUH? HUH?" he said with a huge grin on his face.

Everyone turned and gave Mako a blank stare, then looked back at the crate in disbelief.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Mako Tsunami : Pootietang Tribe**

"If they didn't want any fish, they didn't have to get any… but they could have at least got some punch!" He then pulled out a cup of fruit punch_. _"This is some good shit right here!" He then began to chug the fruit punch.

**Location: Middle of the Island : Immunity Challenge, BABY!**

Both tribes gather as Jeff Probst enters from some unknown location. Kaiba of course is staring a hole through Yami Yugi, who returns the stare by flipping him off.

Jeff cleared his throat as he began to address the duelists.** "**Ok survivors, for your next Immunity Challenge, your gonna pick a representative from your tribe and they will have a battle royal in this circular area I'm standing on. The first person to fall out of the circle loses. OK TEAMS, pick your player!"

Kaiba, without warning, jumped into the ring, then pointed at Yami Yugi.

"Get your ass in the ring, Yugi… NOW!" Kaiba said.

"YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME?" Yami Yugi said.

"No shit, Sherlock!!" Kaiba shouted.

"YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME!" Yami Yugi said challengingly.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK, MUTHAFUCKER!" Kaiba shouted back

"YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME?" Yami Yugi shouted firmly.

"GET YOUR STAR-HEADED ASS IN THIS FUCKIN RING!" shouted an irritated Kaiba.

Yami Yugi strutted towards the ring. As soon as he was a bout to take a step inside, he suddenly pulled his foot back. "naaaaaaaaaaah."

"WHAT!?" shouted a shocked Kaiba.

Yami Yugi suddenly turned and shoved Joey into the ring. "He's all yours."

"OH HELL YEAH!! THIS IS THE DAY IVE BEEN WAITIN' FOR!!" Joey said, cracking his knuckles.

Jeff brought his hand up, then back down. "BEGIN!"

"Bring it on, Kaiba! I waited a LONG time for this moment!" Joey said.

Kaiba began to tremble, as he was uber-pissed about what had just transpired. _**"Wheeler… do not fuck with me. I am NOT in the mood for your canine ass right now…"**_

"WHAT BITCH!? AAAAAAHHHH!"

Joey suddenly charged at Kaiba, who simply sidestepped, and Joey landed outside the ring.

"Joey is out of the ring! The Gazonga Tribe wins the immunity!" Jeff announced.

The Gazonga Tribe celebrated their victory. Kaiba however, was still beyond angry. Never leaving the ring, he glared at Yami.

"YUGI, GET YOUR ASS UP HERE SO I CAN FUCK YOU UP!" he shouted.

"Ass? Fuck up? What Kaiba, are you gay or something? I mean, you have to be… no one else I know wears pants that tight… wait, yes I do… PEGASUS!" Yami responded.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU SON OF A BITCH BASTARD!"

Kaiba charged at Yami like an angry Brahma bull. Much to his dismay however, CBS security grabbed him and pulled him away. The rest of the Gazonga tribe followed.

"YUUUUUUUUGI! TOMORROW! TOMORROW IS THE DAY I KILL YOUR BITCH ASS! YOU HEAR ME? TOMORROW YOU DIE? ITS GONNA BE 200XS WORSE THAN DEATH-T!" Kaiba shouted

(CAMERA TIME)

**Seto Kaiba : Gazonga Tribe Leader**

"I'm gonna kill Yugi. That's all I wanted to say." Kaiba stood up and walked away.

_**Back at the Immunity Challenge site…**_

"Ok Pootietang Tribe. Meet back here tonight for a tribal meeting." Jeff announced. The Pootietang tribe walked back to their campsite.

**Location: Tribal Meeting Campsite : 8:04pm**

During the day, another crate arrived from the sky. Yami Yugi and Duke Devlin brought it back to the campsite once again. The others thought they could hide it from Tea, but that didn't work out as they planned, for she found them, and pulled the same thing she pulled at breakfast. Now the Pootietang Tribe is hungry, and angry towards Tea.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Joey Wheeler : Pootietang Tribe**

"Bitch thinks she can get out of this mess with her sorry ass friendship speech? THINK AGAIN! I'm votin' her ass OFF! And if shes not the one that gets booted, I swear she wont live to see tomorrow! And that, my friends, is a Joey Wheeler PROMISE!"

**(END)**

The tribe gathers, holding their torches as Jeff enters from the side. Joey fought the urge to use his torch to burn Tea.

"Welcome to the Tribal Meeting, Pootietang Tribe! Since you lost the Immunity Challenge, you must decide who gets voted off. One at a time, go up to the vote box, write the name of the person you want voted off, and drop it in the box. Bada bing, bada boom. Yugi! Your up!" Jeff addressed.

Yami Yugi approached the box. He scribbled down a name, then drops it in. "Sorry Tea. You're a bitch. I don't have room on my team for bitches."

As Yami came back, Joey walked up to the box, wrote a name, then drops it in_._ "Burn in hell, Tea." He said.

Soon, everyone was done. Jeff picks up the box and walks it back to the group.

"I will now tally the votes… One vote for Tea… another vote for Tea… one for that stupid, square headed, dick-in-the-ass bitch Tea…, another for… you know what? Tea, just bring me your torch.

Tea was shocked. "But you only read three votes! That's not…"

"I SAID bring me your torch, Tea!"

Tea sadly walked up and hands Jeff her torch. Jeff douses the torch, the breaks it over his leg and throws it behind his shoulder. "Hit the bricks, Tea. Your eliminated. As for the rest of you, go back to camp and prepare for tomorrow!"

The Pootietang tribe went one way and Jeff went another as Tea walked away crying. Suddenly a voice cried out to her.

"So… you say dwarfs cant cook for shit?" came a deep voice from the bushes.

Tea looked around, started. "Huh? Who was…"

Suddenly, a gang of dwarves jumped out from the scrubs and jumped Tea! They tied her up, gagged her, and carried her back into the bushes.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Joey Wheeler : Pootietang Tribe**

"Didn't I tell you I was gonna get her ass kicked? Huh? Well, ok, I said I would kill her, but whats wrong with putting a little hit on someone, right?" Joey said as he winked to the camera.

**Each Tribe has lost one member. What does tomorrow have in store for our survivors? Find out next episode as things start to heat up!**

**I hope you enjoyed the story version better than the script one. I tried to make it more enjoyable. Ill do the same to the next chapter! So look forward to it!**


	3. Dueling Buddies

Hey people! Well I have classes and I'll have to study the rest of the week so ill be swamped. But don't worry. Ill continue to churn out the goods. And before I forget, am I the only one getting pissed at the fact that I cant get hypins on this thing? (you know, those dashs… the straight line). Seto's Sister! Glad you enjoyed the 2nd Episode. I hope I don't let u down with this next one! Everyone enjoy!

**DISCLAIMER: ** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

_Cameras fade in as Jeff Probst is seen…_

**Jeff:** Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for tuning in for tonight's show. If u saw last week's installment, you'll know that Tea Gardner was voted off the island… but to everyone's surprise, she just disappeared afterwards! We'll keep you updated on this situation… but until then… CUE THE INTRO….

_Joey Wheeler walks by and places his hand on Jeff's shoulder._

**Joey: ** It's a fuckin' tragedy…

**Jeff:** It sure is…

**Joey: ** I hope… shes…_ (snickers) _ found…._ (covers his mouth to keep from laughing) _SOON!

_Joey takes off running, followed by hysterical laughter heard from off the cameras_

**Jeff: **Poor Joey… HIT IT BOYS!

_**16 Duelists have gathered on a deserted island to claim 3 Million Dollars and a butt-load of rare cards… now only 14 remain… who will be the next to go? Find out today on…**_

**Survivor: Outwit, Outplay, Outlast**

**Yu-Gi-Oh! Style!**

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor : Gazonga Tribe**

**Rex:** Ok, ive been on this Island for a week now! This is like Duelist Kingdom all over again! I mean, we've got Kaiba Mini-Manor, gourmet food, entertainment, but we lack one thing… GIRLS! How the FUCK did Yugi's tribe end up with all the girls, and our tribe is nothing but a huge sausage fest? I cant deal with this shit! Whatever this next Immunity Challenge is had better involve me and lots and lots of hot, naked asian girls! …. Ok, im gonna go now…

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 2:23pm**

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Mai Valentine : Pootietang Tribe**

**Mai**: OK, this whole thing is getting completely out of hand! I am running out of make up, all my boots are getting scuffed from this sand, and Joey and Tristan fight like a couple of 6 year old girls…

_The scene cuts to Joey sitting outside on a bench, listening to his portable CD player, when Tristan storms up to him._

**Joey: **_(Singing) _

_If you wanna go and take a ride wit me_

_We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's_

_Oh why do I live this way?_

_(In a high pitch voice) Hey, must be the monaay!_

_If you wanna go and get high wit me_

_Smoke a L in the back of the Benz-y_

_Oh why must I feel this way?_

_(in a high pitch voice) Hey, must be the monaay!_

**Tristan: **_(Snatching the headphone off Joey's head) _YOU USED MY FUCKIN' TOOTHBRUSH, DIDN'T YOU!

**Joey: ** WHAT THE FUCK MAN? I did NOT use your toothbrush!

**Tristan: **(_Shoving the toothbrush in Joey's face) _Yes you did bitch! Here, feel this shit! Its WET!

**Joey: **What the fuck is wrong with you, dude! I ain't touchin that shit!

**Tristan: **I SAID FEEL IT!

**Joey: **BITCH!

_Joey slaps the toothbrush out of Tristan's hand, and it flies a few yards and lands inside a halfway full bucket of liquid that has a sign hanging over it that says, "URINAL"_

**Tristan: **NICE GOIN, YOU STUPID KANGAROO MOLESTER!

**Joey: **ANAL CRUSADER!

**Tristan: **NEEDLEDICK!

**Joey: **least I can get mine up, with your monthly subscription to VIAGRA!

**Tristan: **_(teary eyed) _OH YEAH! OH YEAH! WELL…. uh… SERENITY'S A SLUT!

**Joey: **…

**Tristan: **YEAH, I SAID IT!

**Joey: **ILL KILL YOUR ASS!

_Joey dives at Tristan, and the two of them are on the ground in a gruesome brawl. Security guards enter from all sides of the island and pulls the two apart. Each one still trying to break through all the security to get at each other. _

**Joey: **ILL FUCK YOU UP TRISTAN! ILL FUCK YOU UP!

**Tristan: **_(pointing at Joey behind a group of security guards) _YOU AINT GONNA DO SHIT, MAMA'S BOY!

**Joey: **Muthafucka, you just don't know when to….

_Joey bulldozed his way through all of the security guards and speared Tristan to the ground, whaling on him the whole time. Tristan bucked Joey off then got on top of him and started ramming his head into the ground._

**Tristan: **_(Speaking with each slam) _ YOU **(SLAM!)** LIKE **(SLAM!) **THAT **(SLAM!) **BITCH! **(SLAM!)**

_The security guards regrouped and separated the boys again, but as Joey was being dragged off, He delivered a swift kick right to Tristan's stomach._

_The scene cuts back to Mai's Camera Time_

**Mai: ** It fuckin looked like the WWE out there! I mean, it seriously took ALL of CBS security to separate those two! Luckily Yugi was able to talk some sense into the two of them.

_The scene shifts to Yugi's hut. Yami Yugi is walking back and forth with his hands behind his back, then turns to Joey and Tristan, who are sitting down on wicker baskets turned upside down. Tristan has an icepack over his right eye and a fat lip. Joey has a wad of tissue stuffed up his nose and an icepack in between his legs to ease the pain off his no-no's._

**Yami Yugi: **Look at you two… fighting like a couple of children over a fuckin toothbrush!

**Tristan: **BUT IT WAS AN ORAL-B TOOTH…

**Yami Yugi: **I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT TRISTAN! Now I don't know who started this fight or why it started, but…

**Joey: **He called my sister a slut!

**Yami Yugi: **I SAID I DON'T WANNA FUCKIN HEAR IT! WERE SUSPOSED TO BE A TEAM ON THIS ISLAND, AND I WILL NOT SUFFER A LOSS TO THAT BOX-HEADED KAIBA! IVE NEVER LOST TO THAT BITCH AND I NEVER WILL! Now I want you both to shake hands, look each other in the eyes and say, "… I love you, man!"

**Joey and Tristan: **Hell no!

**Yami Yugi: **_(holding up his Millennium Puzzle) _Do you WANT to go to the Shadow Realm? Because I will send you there… Slifer help me, I will send you to the fuckin Shadow Realm so fast your heads'll spin!

**Joey and Tristan: **_(sighs) _

_The two of them grab hands and stares each other in the eyes_

**Joey and Tristan: **… I love you, man.

_Suddenly, the sound of something falling over outside was heard, followed by the sound of footsteps at a fast pace getting quieter… obviously someone running away._

**Joey: **WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Duke Devlin : Pootietang Tribe**

**Duke: **_(holding up a pocket recorder) _ fuckin priceless is all I have to say! _(presses play on the recorder)_

_**Joey and Tristan: … I love you, man.**_

**Duke: **Damn… im gonna make BANK off this shit!

**Location : Gazonga Tribe : 3:35pm**

_Seto Kaiba is outside his mansion, drawing in the sand with a stick his next big idea to kill Yugi_

**Kaiba: **ok, Yugi will be too busy focusing on the Immunity Challenge, so if I can somehow hide the laser blaster in the bushes, but have it pointed upwards, ill nail him in his crooked ass head!

_Mako Tsunami comes up wearing an Armani suit and a Sherlock Holmes hat on his head. Kaiba looks up and shakes his head._

**Kaiba: **What the FUCK are you susposed to be!

**Mako: **Sherlock Mako at your service! Im investigating the disappearance of Tea Gardner. I think YOU had something to do with it!

**Kaiba: **I WAS gonna use that big breasted bitch to lure Yugi into a deathmatch, but her disappearance shot that idea up in smoke. Now get the hell off of our property before I call security on your fruity ass!

**Mako: **Fruity! GREAT IDEA MY GOOD MAN!

_Mako walks across Kaiba's sand scribbling, messing it all up, then takes a seat next to him on the log and pulls out a bottle full of Fruit Punch and starts drinking._

**Kaiba: **AAAAHHH! YOU IGNORANT FUCK! LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY PLANS!

_Mako is chugging away_

**Kaiba: ** … of course… that fuckin Yugi…

_Kaiba storms off the camera and is heading toward the Pootietang Tribe Campsite. The producer tries his best to stop him_

**Producer: **Seto! Hey Seto! You're not allowed on Pootietang property!

_Kaiba, paying no attention to the man, positions his arm across his body and swings, slapping the Producer out of sight. He approaches Yugi's hut._

**Kaiba: **YUGI! GET YOUR SCRAWNY ASS OUT HERE! NOW!

_Yami Yugi opens the door and gives Kaiba his trademark smirk._

**Kaiba: **Wipe that stupid ass look off your face! Why did you send that nutcase to my campsite!

**Yami Yugi: **I think your ass has been in the sun for too long

**Kaiba: **_(puts on, then activates his Duel Disk) _I don't know why you sent that crazy ass fisherman over to my hut, but if u wanted to truly piss me off beyond belief, you did a damn good job of it! Now lets duel!

**Yami Yugi: **You mean Mako? I haven't seen him all day! Look, I have an Immunity challenge to get ready for. But hey, I made this for you!

_Yami tosses a package to Kaiba as he closes the door to his hut. Seto as opens the package, his face turned bright ass red. It was a light pink shirt with the words, "YUGI'S BITCH" in big, bold letters in the front._

**Kaiba: **YUGIIIIIII! I AM GONNA SLAP YOU IN THE MOUTH SO FUCKIN HARD YOU'LL HAVE TO SHOVE YOUR TOOTHBRUSH UP YOUR ASS TO BRUSH YOUR YELLOW ASS TEETH!

_Soon, Yugi's door opens again, but he has his trademark blue jacket closed. _

**Yami Yugi: **BOY IT SURE DOES GET HOT ON THIS ISLAND! I THINK I NEED TO TAKE THIS HOT, HOT JACKET OFF!

_Yami unzips his jacket and takes it off, revealing a shirt that says, "KAIBA'S DADDY" in big, bold letters_

**Kaiba: **OH YOU BITCH! YOU MONKEY ASS BITCH!

_Kaiba charges the hut, but security takes grabs him and takes him back to the Gazonga Campsite._

**Yugi: **SEE YOU AT THE IMMUNITY CHALLENGE, SETO!

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Seto Kaiba : Gazonga Tribe Leader**

**Kaiba: **Yugi thinks he's SO fuckin funny with that shirt! Well ill show him when we whoop that ass at the next Immunity Challenge!

**Location: Gazonga Tribe : 4:56pm**

_Inside the Mansion, Rex Raptor is on the phone talking to some girl, while Odion plays a board game with Mokuba._

**Rex: ** ... so yeah, u think u can come to this island? Theres NO girls in my tribe!

**Girl: **like, I don't know… who did you say you were again?

**Rex: **Rex Raptor… Runner up in the Japan Regional Duel Monsters competiton!

**Girl:** Oh my god! I LOVE DUELISTS! THEYRE SO AWESOME! Especially Yugi Muto and Seto Kaiba! They're SOO hot! And Joey Wheeler too!

**Rex: (groans)**

**Girl: **Wait… your not the bug guy are you?

**Rex: **NO! FUCK NO! I SAID I'M THE DINO DUELIST!

**Girl: **oohh, ok.. cuz that guy freaks me out! He's sooo stupid

**Rex: **Try living with him… so, think I can come see you?

**Girl: **ok… you sound pretty cute anyways

**Rex: (quietly) **_YES! YES! YES!_

**Girl: **My address is…

**_(Call was cut.)_**

**Rex: **NO! NO! FOR THE LOVE OF OBELISK, NOOOOO!

**Mokuba: **Hey, shut up, Raptor! Were trying to play here!

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Odion : Gazonga Tribe**

**Odion : **I asked this once already… and now I'll ask it again… how the FUCK did I get stuck babysitting this kid? Were sitting over here playing Destiny Board Traveler for cryin' out loud! I mean, it was fun the first 30 minutes, but this game went on for 6 hours… 6 HOURS!

_Weevil enters the room while Rex is pounding his head off the keyboard of the computer._

**Weevil: **You've been on all day! Get up so I can check my email.

**Rex: **Fuck you! I'm not movin' til I get laid

**Weevil: **Here's an idea… go in the bathroom and spank your Mini-zowler

**Rex: _(jumps up from the computer) _**He's a MEGAZOWLER!

**Weevil: **I know what the card is called! Im talking about your…

**Rex: **I wasn't talking about the card either, Weevil Underwear!

**Weevil: **What was that?

_Weevil snatches Rex's beanie off his head and takes off running with it. Rex jumps up and chases him through the mansion angrily. They run through the kitchen and almost runs into Marik, who's walking to the living room with a big ass sandwich and a glass of grape soda._

**Marik: **Hey, what grade are you fuckers in? Runnin though the motherfuckin house like your 4 year olds! _(looks at the clock) _Shit! The Sublime concert is about to come on!

_The chase goes outside, where Kaiba is drawing blueprints on a log. Weevil runs by and jumps on the log, not seeing Kaiba there. Kaiba Is now level 20 pissed. Weevil dangles the beanie over Rex's head._

**Rex: (jumping up for his hat) **give me my fuckin hat, you dung beetle!

**Weevil: **Come on, do a flip for it!_ (Continues to dangle the hat) (singing) _

_Flip, Flip, Flip, Flip! GAME OVER!_

_Weevil is suddenly pushed off the log and lands on top of Rex. They both look up to see Kaiba activating his Duel Disk. _

**Kaiba: **You assholes picked the WRONG Duelist to fuck with! I USE POLYMERIZATION TO FUSE MY THREE BLUE-EYES WHITE DRAGONS, TO FORM BLUE-EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON! THEN I USE DRAGON TREASURE TO INCREASE MY BLUE-EYES' ATTACK POWER!

**BLUE-EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON : 5000**

**Weevil and Rex: **… ooohh fuck me…

_The cameras zoom out as a huge explosion is heard across the island. Scene cuts quickly to the Pootietang Tribe, where Duke and Bakura are being Interigated by Mako_

**Duke: **What the fuck was that!

**Bakura: **No Clue

**Mako: **OK, no changing the subject! Where were you two the night Tea was voted off?

**Duke: **Fuckin walkin back to camp with your nutty ass!

_Bakura suddenly stands up and points to the ocean. _

**Bakura: **Mako, look! A DOLPHIN IS CAUGHT IN A FISHING NET!

**Mako: **WHAT? HANG ON FRIEND! ILL SAVE YOU!

_Mako tears off his suit and runs towards the ocean and starts swimming like a madman. Bakura and Duke both have the classic anime sweat drop hanging from their heads._

**Bakura: **I cant believe that worked…

**Duke: **I cant believe homeboy ran into that cold ass water in just his boxers…

**Location: Domino Pier : 8:30pm : IMMUNITY CHALLENGE! WOOO!**

**Jeff: **Welcome back ladies and gentlemen! Behold, the beautiful island where our duelists are currently dwelling! Today's Immunity Challenge puts their skills to the test as we find out just what they learned living on an island. (_points up to the sky) _ Our Survivor Chooper is currently roaming the skies around the island. Our survivors has to somehow signal the chopper to land at their campsite. The flashiest signal wins the Immunity! When they see the flare, the challenge begins!

_Jeff pulls out a flare gun and fires it upwards_

**Gazonga Tribe**

**Kaiba: **Ready?

_Rex and Weevil are standing there, clothes singed and burned in some places from the Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon_

**Mokuba: **Ready big brother!

**Kaiba: **NOW ODION!

_Odion throws a gas bomb and it explodes, leaking out gasoline. Kaiba, Odion, Rex, Weevil, Marik, and Bonz takes off running. Mokuba however, stood there and bent over._

**Mokuba: **FIRE IN THE HOLE!

_Mokuba farts, and huge explosion is heard and scene, but the helicopter kept flying. Mokuba stood there, charred from the explosion. The Gazongas poked their heads out from the brush. _

**Weevil: **I knew that shit wasn't gonna work!

**Bonz: **_(Looking upwards) _Guys, look!

_Everyone watches as the plane comes in for a landing, but not in the Gazonga Tribe helipad, but in the Pootietang area!_

**Kaiba: **Not again… NOT AGAIN! SON OF AN ASS!

_The scene cuts back to Jeff Probst back on Domino Pier_

**Jeff: ** And the Pootietang Tribe wins! Lets see how they did it!

_The scene cuts to a high tree in the Pootietang area with Mai at the very top… topless! The pilot saw that and instantly landed. Mai climbs back down, putting her top and jacket back on. _

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Mai Valentine : Pootietang Tribe**

**Mai: **Sorry boys, but the goodies stay in the jar!

**Location: Tribal Meeting Grounds : 10:21pm**

**Jeff: **well well well, look whos back!

**Rex: **Shut up, Probst!

**Jeff: **Go blow Espa Roba, Raptor!

**Rex: **What bitch! What are you, Michael Jackson? You wanna be startin' somethin'?

**Jeff: **_(choosing to ignore Rex's stupid ass comeback)_ OK, you all know the drill. Get to voting!

_And so, the votes were written, then tallied. Jeff proceeds to reading off the votes_

**Jeff: **One for Weevil…. Two for Weevil… three for Weevil… hmmm, all the votes are the same. Weevil, bring me your torch.

_Weevil pouts and makes a pissed off face at Rex, who is laughing at him and flipping him off. Weevil takes his torch and hands it to Jeff._

**Jeff: **Weevil, the tribe has spoken. Hit the bricks. Your out! Security will escort you off the island so we don't have another Tea incident on our hands.

_CBS Security comes and tries to guide Weevil away, but he pulls his arm back._

**Weevil: **TAKE YOUR FUCKIN HANDS OFF ME! I MAY HAVE GOTTEN VOTED OFF, BUT IM STILL WEEVIL UNDERWOOD! BUG DUELIST EXTRODINAIRE!

**Rex: (Shouting) **MORE LIKE WEEVIL HAS-NO-WOOD! HAHAHAHAHA!

**Weevil: **YOU RAT BASTARD!

_Weevil tried charging at Rex, but was caught by security and escorted off the island._

**Jeff: **ok Gazongas… back to your campsite and rest up! You have a busy day ahead of you tomorrow!

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Seto Kaiba: Gazonga Tribe Leader**

**Kaiba: **Now were 2 people short! That fuckin Yugi is ahead of me! Well no problem… because tomorrow, he's mine! And that I promise! I know I said that already and I meant it, but this time, I MEAN IT, mean it! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

_Kaiba stops in mid laughter as he notices a stage-hand walking around with a "Kaiba's Daddy" shirt on. _

**Kaiba: **YOU ASSHOLE! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT SHIRT?

**Stagehand: **_(shrieks) _Y-Y-Yugi gave it to me!

**Kaiba: **Son of a…

_Kaiba runs off camera and the sounds of a serious beatdown is heard as Kaiba beats the high holy shit out of the stage hand._

**We are down to 13 Duelists people! What's Kaiba's big plan this time? Whats in store for our Survivors! Find out next time on Survivor: Yu-Gi-Oh! Style!**

**Ok people, I know this was a boring chapter, but I'm having some serious writer's block already… what with classes about to start up again. Don't worry though… next chapter will be BETTER! I promise! Ill update inbetween class and homework! But in the meantime, please review and don't be too harsh.. : - )**


	4. Sabotage!

Everybody, sorry for the long wait, but Episode 4 is done! And a Hello to my favorite critic/friend, the lovely Seto's Sister!

**DISCLAIMER: ** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

**13 Duelists are left… The Pootietang Tribe is up by 1… whos gonna be the next person tossed of the island? Find out today on:**

**_Survivor: Outwit, Outplay, Outlast_**

**_Yu-Gi-Oh! Style!_**

_Another day arrives on the Island as our survivors awaken for another day… _

_The Pootietang tribe is working on a project… all except Duke Devlin, who is still playing with the tape recorder he used to record Joey and Tristan's apology._

_The Gazonga tribe is working on a project of their own.. all except Seto Kaiba. He's in a secret room in the mansion, sitting at an art desk with blueprints pinned up all around his work station, a cup of coffee in the corner, a pencil behind his ear, and he's wearing a pair of glasses. _

**Kaiba: **This will be my Ultimate Revenge, Yugi! This will make Death-T look like a kiddy land amusement park! _(He looks over his shoulder to see the torn up remains of the "Kaiba's Daddy" T-shirt lying on the floor. He hocked a loogie on it, then turned back to his work_).

Bitch thinks he's SO funny… ill show his skinny ass… I'll show you all!

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 2:12pm**

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Tristan Taylor : Pootietang Tribe**

**Tristan: **Me and Joey are cool now about the whole toothbrush incident. He even promised the buy me a new one. I tell ya, nothin' touches these sexy ass molars but Oral-B, baby! Yeah, that's right! The B is for BABY! So anyways, I need to get something off my chest… we need to get rid of that annoying ass Duke Devlin! He thinks just because he got laid by the hottest girl at our school, that he's hot shit! We'll he's nothing but a pain in the ass! I NEVER liked his skeleton lookin butt! Right from day one, the minute I saw him, I was like, "I bet that guy is gay! He probably love big, buff, burly men!

**Scene cuts to Joey and Tristan watching Soul Train on an old black and white tv that washed on the shore**

**Joey: **Hey, I don't know if the TV is fuckin up again, but dat girl has got a big ass!

**Tristan: **It ain't the TV, man… that girl has got a ghetto booty!

_They both look at each other._

**Joey and Tristan: **Badunkadunk!

_They slap five._

_Bakura runs past them and hides under the table_

**Bakura: **YOU HAVENT SEEN ME! FOR THE LOVE OF OBELISK, YOU HAVENT SEEN ME!

**Joey: **Da fuck!

_Duke walks up to Joey and Tristan_

**Duke: **Has any of you guys seen Bakura?

_Joey and Tristan watches Bakura as he desparately begs silently not to rat him out._

**Tristan:** … I don't know… Joey… have we seen Bakura?

**Joey: **… Ba- who – a?

**Duke: **Oh well… guess I have to tell YOU guys what happened.

**Joey: **OH HELL NAW!

**Tristan: **NOT THAT FUCKIN STORY AGAIN!

_Joey and Tristan started running like madmen into the woods with Duke following them the whole while._

**Duke: **Ok, It was after school and I had to stay after to tutor this chick! Well I didn't know she was gonna bring her friend along, and one thing led to another…

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Bakura Ryou : Pootietang Tribe**

**Bakura: **I didn't want to put Joey and Tristan through that, but Duke told me that story like 8 times in the past 30 minutes! I think he's just being cocky! I mean, look at me! I'm hot! If I wanted to, I could sleep with Paris Hilton! But then again, who hasn't, right! **(Smiles brightly)**

_Later that night, Bakura slept. He was suddenly woken up. _

**Bakura: **GOOD HEAVENS! WHAT THE….

_A hand covered Bakura's mouth as he slowly turned his head to see the dark, shadowy figure of Yami Yugi looming over him. Yami put his index finger to his lips and motioned for Bakura to follow him. Outside, Joey, Tristan, Mai, Duke and Mako were standing outside Bakura's hut._

**Bakura: **Is this an Immunity Challenge? Its like 3am.

**Yami Yugi: **Not exactly. Were going on a little… Midnight walk…

**Bakura: **How refreshing!

_Yami Yugi handed Bakura a backpack. _

**Yami Yugi: **DO NOT open that until we get to our destination!

**Bakura: **_(smiling) _Were going to camp out? How fun!

**Yami Yugi: **Lets go… and don't make a SOUND! The last thing we need are those cameras on our asses.

_Yami Yugi led his tribe through the brush. They were being as quiet and careful as can be, like a bunch of ninjas in the night. Duke started going on and on about how he's a ladies man, pissing everyone off. Joey wanted to jab him with a rusted knife, but Yugi told him not to, telling him that they'll need Duke for their latest "project". As they arrived at their destination, Yugi put his index finger over his lips again and pointed at none other than the Gazonga Tribe mansion. _

**Mai: **_what are we doing here?_

**Yami Yugi: **_we're gonna do a little… redecorating… if you know what I mean!_

_Joey and Tristan both had huge kool-aid grins on their faces_

**Yami Yugi: **_Pootietang… have a ball!_

_Everyone had a great time as they tagged up the house. Duke however hit an alarm wire, and sirens blared and searchlights came on._

**Tristan: **_(whips around so fast he almost gave himself whiplash) _ WHAT THE HELL! WHAT THE FUCK?

**Mai: **DUKE YOU STUPID JACKASS!

**Joey: **_(looking around, panicking) _IM GONNA FILE THIS UNDER THE CATEGORY OF _NOT GOOD!_

**Bakura: **What'll we do now, Yugi! Yugi?

_Everyone looked around to see Yami Yugi hauling ass through the bushes. He was running so fast that he disappeared in the darkness. Mako closed his eyes and crossed his arms._

**Mako: **In a situation like this, Yugi did exactly the right thing.

_Without warning, Mako broke out running. For someone who walked around barefoot, he could move pretty fast under pressure! The remaining members of the Pootietang tribe followed Yugi and Mako's example and took off running. Duke, falling behind, grabbed Bakura and pulled him back. Bakura tripped as he was pulled back. Joey, Mai, and Tristan saw that._

**Joey, Tristan, and Mai: **BAKURA!

_Duke started pushing them. _

**Duke: **NO TIME! KEEP RUNNING!

_Soon, the Pootietang tribe was panting from running so hard inside Yugi's hut. _

**Yami Yugi: **O…k… which one… of you …. Klutzes…. Tripped… the fuckin… ALARM?

**Joey: **Duke Dumbass right here!

_Joey socked Duke in the arm_

**Yami Yugi: **Shit! WHERES BAKURA!

**Tristan: **Duke Dickweed right here wouldn't let us stop to see!

_Tristan punched Duke in the other arm._

**Duke: **Hey, it was every man for themselves. Bakura just…

**Yami Yugi:** Save it! Lets go find Bakura!

_The Pootietang tribe walked outside causally, in case the producers of the show were out, but there was someone out there… it was Bakura!_

**Mai: **BAKURA! THANK RA YOUR OK!

**Joey: **What a relief! We thought you got caught by Kaiba!

_Bakura was different… it wasn't the Bakura we all know and love… it was Yami Bakura! Yami Bakura instantly charged straight for Duke and speared him on the ground and started whaling on him._

**Yami Bakura: ** SON OF A BITCH! YOU SON OF A RAT BASTARD! I SWALLOWED A FUCKIN ROACH WHEN YOU TRIPPED ME! A NASTY PIECE OF SHIT MUTHAFUCKIN ROACH!

_Everyone watched as Yami Bakura pummeled Duke to oblivion._

**Mai: **As much as I'm enjoying this… shouldn't we stop this?

**Tristan: **(sitting on a log with his legs crossed, eating a bowl of popcorn) Hell no! I'm enjoying this!

_The next morning, on a more luxurious side of the island, the CBS producers sat at a round table and had breakfast. They were laughing, joking, having a great time, telling Pegasus jokes and how theyre going to be the number 1 channel on Network t.v. Suddenly, without warning, Seto Kaiba busted into the trailor. The producers jumped at the door slamming. Kaiba walked straight up to Jeff Probst and grabbed him by the arm, then dragged him outside behind him._

**Jeff: **Kaiba! Kaiba! What are you doing? We aren't scheduled to be on the air for another hour and a half! What's the big idea!

_Kaiba didn't say a word… he instead, had a very, VERY angry look on his face. They arrived at the Gazonga Mansion. Kaiba pulled Jeff in front of him and pointed angrily at the mansion_

**Kaiba: **LOOK AT THIS SHIT!

_The mansion was tagged all over the place with different colored spraypaint. The mansion was also decorated with toilet paper and eggs… some regular, and others rotten. His famous black limo was keyed all over. There was also poor drawings of the other Gazonga tribe members, like one that said "Kaiba is gay" and he was wearing a rainbow colored shirt with a huge grin on his face. It was a horrible scene._

**Jeff: **Oh my god… who could have done such a thing!

**Kaiba:** It was that fuckin Yugi! I want his ass right here… NOW! Not only is he gonna clean this shit up, im gonna have a fuckin cat o' nine tails to lash his ass every other second! You get him here NOW!

**Jeff: **Seto… I don't Yugi is to blame for this. The Tribes aren't allowed on each other's property.

**Kaiba: **WELL THAT DIDN'T STOP THAT NUTTY ASS FISHERMAN FROM COMING OVER HERE, NOW DID IT?

_Kaiba grabbed Jeff again and walked him over to the side of the mansion_

**Kaiba: **This should PROVE that Yugi is to blame!

_Kaiba, now uber-pissed, pointed at a messege on the side of the house that said, "Pootietang Rules"_

**Jeff: ** Seto… this STILL doesn't prove anything! Anyone could have done that to frame the Pootietang Tribe! But if it makes you feel better, we'll talk to Yugi and his tribe and get to the bottom of this.

**Kaiba: **TALK? TO HELL WITH TALK! THE ONLY THING THAT'S GONNA BE TALKIN IS MY FOOT, AS IT'S GETTING SHOVED DIRECTLY UP YUGI'S ASS!

**ON AIR!**

**Location: Pootietang Tribe: 2:21pm**

_Jeff is interrogating Yugi. Jeff is pacing around the hut with Yugi sitting on a log with his legs crossed, cool as a cucumber._

**Jeff: **Ok Yugi! Be honest… did you and your tribe trash the Gazonga Mansion?

**Yami Yugi: **_(a face, innocent look on his face_) Jeff! I would NEVER do a thing like that! Sure, me and Kaiba have had our differences, but I can assure you that me and my tribe had NOTHING to do with the whole spray paint and limo being keyed incident.

**Jeff: **Hmmm… that's odd… because I never mentioned the spray paint… the limo being keyed.

**Yami Yugi: **… shit… _(quickly holds up the Millennium Puzzle)_ This bad boy gives me the ability to see what goes on around this island. So I know all about what happened to the Gazonga Mansion!

**Jeff: **funny… doesn't the Millennium Necklace gives the user that abili…

_Yugi reaches into his back pocket and quickly whipped out the Millennium Necklace and flashed it in front of Jeff's face._

**Jeff: **ok… well that still doesn't explain the fact that "Pootietang Rules" was tagged on the side of the house.

_An empty can of spray paint suddenly rolled out from under Yugi's bed, but he quickly shoved it back under with his foot._

**Yami Yugi: **… fuck this shit… I'm outta here!

_The Millenium Puzzle flashed, and young Yugi was standing there._

**Yugi: **It was all Duke! He wanted to mess with Kaiba's head! He was the one who tripped the wire!

**Jeff: **ok, thank you Yugi. I knew your honesty would get the best of you.

_As Jeff left the hut, Yami Yugi's transparent image appeared next to Yugi._

**Yami Yugi: **You know… you probably just fucked Duke over

**Yugi: **So? He shouldn't be such a stupid bitch.

**Location: Middle of the Island : 3:00pm**

**Rewards Challenge**

_Our survivors gathered on the middle of the Island, talking amongst themselves. Kaiba was staring a hole through Yugi (but hey, what else is new, right?) but something wasn't right… Duke wasn't there. Jeff entered to explain the new challenge to everyone._

**Joey: **Hey Probst. Where's Devlin's skeleton lookin' ass?

**Jeff: **I'm getting ready to explain that. Well survivors, since an unfortunate turn of events took place last night, I think we all know what that was…

_Yami Yugi pointed at Kaiba, then raised an eyebrow with a huge grin on his face, letting him know that Yugi really was behind the whole prank. Kaiba then mouth the words, "fuckin son of a whore." back at Yugi._

**Jeff: **So due to this turn of events, we had to "dismiss" the person behind that stunt. Yes, Duke Devlin, was kicked off the island.

_Cheers and hoots and hollers soon arouse from the Pootietang side._

**Jeff: **Now, because of this, were gonna have a Rewards Challenge. No sweat-breaking work today. This will be easy. The Team Captains will

**Kaiba: **FIGHT TO THE DEATH!

**Jeff: **NO! you'll both draw a card from the top of your decks. The one with the highest attack points wins! If it's a trap or magic card, then draw til you get a monster card. Now Team Captains, to the front.

_Yugi and Kaiba faced each other. Yugi with his clever smirk on his face, and Kaiba with his uber-pissed off look… now he's REALLY made because he knows that Yugi really was the one who tagged his mansion and keyed his limo. I mean, he may be the President of a large multimillion dollar company, but he has to keep his shit lookin pimpin!_

**Kaiba: **I should punch you in your fuckin nose.

**Yami Yugi: **You ain't gonna do SHIT.

**Kaiba: **You wanna bet you little fuck-nugget!

**Jeff: **ahem!

_Kaiba and Yami Yugi set their decks down on a log. Shouts of encouragement came from both sides of the tribes, rooting on their team leader. Both of them placed their hands on their decks._

**Jeff: **Survivors ready… DRAW!

_Kaiba draws his card and grins like a psychopath. Not saying a word, he looks Yugi dead in his eyes and flips his card around, Revealing the Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon!_

**Kaiba: **Beat that you pansy ass son of a bitch! _(turns to Jeff) _Just give us the prize, Probst! Ain't NO card in Yugi's deck strong enough to beat this bad boy right here! _(turns back to Yugi) _I've FINALLY beaten you, Yugi! How does the humiliation taste? Are you embarrassed, you clown? You SHOULD be!

_Yami Yugi's cocky smirk soon flipped as he put his game face on. _

**Yami Yugi: **_(to himself) _Heart of the cards… guide me…

_Yugi pulled a card and looked at it, then punched his left hand down on the log as he bowed his head and closed his eyes tightly._

**Kaiba: **SEE! I TOLD YOU! NOTHING CAN COMPARE TO THE BLUE-EYES SHINING DRAGON! SO WHERES YOUR HEART OF THE CARDS BULLSHIT NOW, YUGI! THIS CHALLENGE WAS JUST THE BEGINNING!

**Yami Yugi: **Grrr… That Blue Eyes Shining Dragon is really powerful!

**Jeff: **and the Gazonga Tribe wins the…

**Yugi: **_(interrupting Jeff) _BUT ITS JUST NOT AS STRONG AS THE SORCERER OF DARK MAGIC, NOW IS IT!

_(**Yu-Gi-Oh! fact: Sorcerer of Dark Magic really is stronger than Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon. SoDM – 3200 atk., BESD – 3000. So please, no emails saying this isn't true because I own both of those cards… just thought id get that out before the mail came in! and now, back to our story!)**_

**Kaiba: **WHAT THE FLYING HELL?

**Jeff: **And the Pootietang Tribe wins the Reward! _(pulls a tarp from over a box)_ The prize is… a huge box of Chocolate Chip Cookies!

**Joey: **OH HELLS YEAH!

**Tristan: **I call first dibs!

_Joey and Tristan lifts the huge box of cookies and takes off running, with Mai, Mako, and Bakura running after them._

**Mai: **HEY BITCHES! FRIENDS SHARE AND SHARE ALIKE!

**Kaiba: **I don't know how one asshole gets so LUCKY! WHERE ARE YOU GETTING ALL THIS LUCK FROM YOU POMPOUS BASTARD!

**Yami Yugi: **_(turning and walking away with his hands in his pockets) From yo' mama._

**Kaiba: **FUCKIN SON OF A ……!

_CBS security grabs Kaiba before he can try to attack Yugi and drags him back to the Gazonga Campsite, with the other members not far away._

**Kaiba: **You'll get your you anal crusader! Mark my words!

**Yami Yugi: **I said it once and I'll say it again… YOU AREN'T GONNA DO SHIT!

**OFFAIR**

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 3:06am**

_A group of shadowy figures has infiltrated the Pootietang Tribe Campsite. They each stood holding what looked like flamethrowers. One of the figures stepped forward. _

**Kaiba: **is everybody ready?

**Mokuba: **Ready big brother.

**Odion: **awwww, yeah!

**Marik: **all set on my end.

**Bonz: **check!

**Rex: **ready to take it to those bitch-a-saurs!

**Kaiba: **Alright then. Lets torch this bitch.

_And with that, The Gazonga Tribe took aim at Yugi and his tribe's huts._

**Kaiba: **_(singing) The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire!_

**Rex: **_(singing) We don't need no water, let that motherfucker burn!_

**Marik: **_(singing) Burn, motherfucker!_

_Suddenly, a voice rang from a tall tree overlooking the Pootietang Campsite… the same tree that Mai was topless in._

**Joey: **HEY! BITCHES!

_The Gazonga Tribe turned around only to find that the Pootietang tribe had made a treehouse fort out of that tall tree._

**Yami Yugi: **FIRE!

_The Pootietang tribe started to assault the Gazonga Tribe with rotten eggs and water guns… well, Mako had the water gun… anyways, the Gazonga Tribe ran off screaming! Except for Bonz, who was picking up eggs off the ground and eating them. Then he started to run behind his team as the onslaught of eggs continued. _

**Tristan: **That should teach those bitches to try and fuck with our home!

**Joey: **Hell yeah! You mess with the ox and you get the horns, baby!

**Bakura: **Hey Yugi… how long do you think Kaiba is going to keep this little rivalry up?

**Yami Yugi: **To be perfectly honest, I hope it goes on for a really LONG time! I LOVE pissing him off! Its the funniest thing since Chris Rock! You all should have seen his face when I gave him that 'Yugi's Bitch'" tshirt! That was a fuckin Kodak moment!

_The Pootietang tribe laughed hysterically_

**Joey: **Hey Yuge, what about the very first time you beat him at duel monsters! We went off the air when he started crying like a little bitch!

**Mai: **Oh my god! Are you serious!

**Joey: **YEAH! THAT FUCKER WAS CRYING HARDER THAN AN 8 YEAR OLD GIRL!

_And so, the Pootietang tribe stayed up the rest of the night, not only defending their campsite, but laughing, eating the cookies, and telling Kaiba and Duke Devlin jokes… Yugi, Joey, Tristan, Mai, Bakura, and Mako all had a wonderful time. yes, it was a good time to be a Pootietang member. And we close my friends, with a Happy Ending._

**Well, another duelist is eliminated off the island, but another day brings a new challenge and a new adventure. What is in store for our Survivors next week? Will Kaiba FINALLY kill Yugi? Probably not, but hey, its fun watching him try, right? Join us next time for Survivor: Duelist Style! **

**Please R&R if you have the chance. _(Smiles)_**


	5. Rumble in the Jungle

Hey Everybody! I've got some free time so I thought I would take some time and start the next chapter while I'm sitting here in the computer lab doing absolutely NOTHING! Lets do it to it!

**DISCLAIMER: ** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

Duelist after Duelist have been eliminated from Destiny Island (not to be confused with the same Destiny Island from Kingdom Hearts. What can I say? I like the name!), but 12 Duelists still remains. Who's going to get kicked off? Who's going to turn on who? Find out today on:

_**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast**_

**Jeff: **Its another day here on Destiny Island as we join our survivors for yet another day of debauchery. I'm sad to announce however that Bonz, the Duelist from the Gazonga Tribe, has gotten gravely ill and we had to send him home… our best wishes goes out to Bonz… get it… Gravely… grave… hes a Duelist of the dead? Laughs like crazy

_Rex Raptor is seen in the background._

**Rex: **fuckin retard…

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor: Gazonga Tribe**

**Rex: **That was the gayest joke I've ever heard! Just wanted to let that out. Anyways, it sucks that Bonz got sick. He was a great guy. I had nothing against him. I mean he talked about corpses and cathedrals and all that other weird shit, but hey, at least he has a hobby! But you know what? It serves his ass right? Why would you eat rotten eggs off the ground? I didn't think anything would happen to him cuz he's one of those gothic guys, but that just goes to show you that no matter how weird you are, _(Holds up a picture of Weevil) _were all still human.

_Rex is being told by a stagehand off camera that he thinks he's a dinosaur._

**Rex: **Dude, that's just a fuckin gimmick! I know damn well I'm not a dinosaur! Come on, how fucked up are you!

**Location: Oasis on the Pootietang Property , 2:18pm**

_Yugi, Joey, Tristan, Mai, Mako, and Bakura are enjoying a hot summer day in their private oasis. Mai is suntaning, Mako fishes on top of a rock, and Yugi, Joey, Bakura, and Tristan plays water dodgeball._

**Yugi: **Here it comes!

_Throws the ball, and is easily caught by Joey._

**Joey: **_(laughing) _Got it! NOW TRISTAN!

_Tristan quickly gets out of the water, then jumps up into the air. Joey tosses the ball to him, where he easily catches it and spikes it down at Yugi, nailing him right in the face!_

**Yugi: **_(has a gigantic welt on his face in the shape of a ball) _OWWW…!

**Bakura: laughing hysterically, falling back into the water**

**Tristan: **Ok Yuge, u know the deal… whoever got pegged first would have to go ALL the way back to the campsite and get the food that we forgot to bring.

**Yugi: **_(sighing) _YEAH YEAH, IM GOING!

**Mai: **_(sitting in a lawnchair, takin in rays, wearing a skimpy bikini and sunglasses) _And watch out too… Kaiba may be out there somewhere, planning something.

**Yugi: **Don't worry about me, guys! Ill be fine!

_Yugi gets out of the water and drys off, then puts on his blue pants, black shirt, blue uniform jacket, and those one shoes that look like boots, and starts to walk off into the wilderness, with the Millennium Puzzle around his neck as usual. Joey and Tristan then began to plan something. They talked amongst themselves for a while, then went to opposite ends of the oasis and approached Mai._

**Joey: **_(mouthing words) _Are you ready, fool?

**Tristan: **_(mouthing words) _Hell yeah! Lets dunk her ass!

_Joey and Tristan moved silently… quieter than the night before, when they infiltrated the Gazonga property line, and got closer, and closer to Mai... not making a single sound. Just when the were on the verge of lifting Mai's beautiful body, she pulls a Lara Croft and pulls out two Desert Eagles out of nowhere and pointed them on both sides at Joey and Tristan's heads._

**Joey and Tristan: screaming for dear life**

**Mai:** Touch me and ill stain this forest with your fuckin brains.

**Mako: _(from across the oasis) _**That bitch is packin' some SERIOUS heat!

**Bakura: _(from the pool) _**ooohhh yeah…

**Location: Middle of the Jungle : 2:25pm**

_Yugi is seen walking across the jungle, trying to get back to his tribe so he can return with the food for the picnic. As Yugi walks, he begins to feel uneasy. Yami Yugi's transparent image appeared next to him as he walked through the vast jungle._

**Yugi: **I've got a bad feeling about this, Pharaoh…

**Yami Yugi: **What's wrong, Yugi?

**Yugi: **I just feel like there's something… out there…

**Yami Yugi: **Yes… and now that you mention it, I can feel a dark presence. Stay on your toes, Yugi.

_Deeper and deeper they walked… Yugi had no idea the Oasis was this far from the campsite.. the fear was obviously getting to him. Yugi and his partner stepped through some brush, only to find a huge field of nothing. The trees and bushes have been completely whipped out as there was nothing but vast dirt. _

**Yugi: **Ok, this was NOT there before! Now I've REALLY got a bad feeling about this!

**Yami Yugi: **What the fuck! What the hell is that noise?

**Yugi: **What noise?

**Yami Yugi: **Shhh! Listen!

_They both listened… the sound was getting louder and louder._

**Yugi: **Joey! Tristan! Knock it off! This shit isn't funny anymore!

**Yami Yugi: **I obviously don't think those two knuckleheads are to blame for this… Yugi! Let me take over!

**Yugi: **Okay!

_Yugi closed his eyes as the Millennium Puzzle flashed._

"**YU-GI-OH!"**

_Yami Yugi kept his eyes closed as he listened to the sound get closer and closer and closer. Suddenly, without warning, his eyes shot open._

**Yami Yugi: **That's a fuckin automobile!

_At the EXACT moment Yami Yugi spoke, he whipped around and saw a camoflauge colored 2003 Safari Nissan Jeep tear out of the brush and was heading straight toward him! Yami Yugi dove out of the way just in the nick of time as the Jeep ALMOST clipped him! The person driving the Jeep was… guess! Come on, I think we all know who that is! Yep! It was Espa Roba! PSYCHE! It was Seto Kaiba! Kaiba looked in his rear view mirror to see Yami stagger to his feet. _

**Kaiba: **Oh no the fuck your not! You aren't getting off the hook that easy you shit stain!

_Kaiba pulled the parking brake and frantically turned the wheel, making the Jeep do 3 or 4 sets of donuts til it was facing Yami again. He released the brake and took off at Yami again with the speedometer going up at a fast rate. _

**Yami Yugi: **_(shaking his head) _KAIBA! YOU BASTARD! HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?

_Again, Yami dove out of the way, just in the nick of time. Kaiba let out a battle cry the whole time as he tried to run Yami over. Each time he missed, he used his donut technique until he was perfectly aligned with Yami, then took off after him again. Kaiba rolled down his window on the 4th attempt._

**Kaiba: **I told you I was gonna kill your ass, didn't I Yugi! What do you think of my Destruction Derby of Doom!

**Yami Yugi: **YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU WANNA TAKE THIS SHIT UP A LEVEL?

**Kaiba: **YES I DO, ASS FACE!

_Kaiba repeated his donut tactic, but instead of aligning himself with Yami, he kept driving, then flipped a bitch (that's a U-turn for those of you who don't know the lingo) and drove at Yamii. This time, he rolled down his window and pointed a gun at him and began firing like crazy! Yami ran as fast as he could, diving every other step to dodge bullets AND and a crazed Jeep. Yami, starting to get tired, jumped into the bushes for safety._

**Kaiba: **NO YOU DON'T BITCH! YOU ARENT GETTING AWAY THAT EASILY!

_Kaiba turned on some special X-Ray headlights, which allowed him to look through the bushes and trees! He saw Yami, crotched behind a boulder._

**Kaiba: **Your mine you goat rapist!

_The Jeep took off into the bushes, mowing shit down as it went through. Yami waited til Kaiba was good and close enough, then, when the time was right, nimbily climbed up a tree, then dived down on Kaiba's jeep, holding 2 giant tree branches with sharp pointed in the end. Yami landed hard on the hood of the jeep as he drove the sharp points of the tree brances into it. The hood started to smoke. Kaiba was turning the steering wheel like a mad man, trying to shake Yugi off. _

**Kaiba: **Get your kamikaze ass off my car so I can run your bitch ass over!

**Yami Yugi: _(pointing his middle finger up at Kaiba)_**

_Yami waited til the car was just about back in the middle of the dirt field, when he pulled out some dynamite (where he got dynamite from is beyond me), pulled out one of the tree branches, lit the dynamite fuse, and dropped it into the hole. Kaiba shook his head in disgust as he saw what Yami did. _

**Kaiba: **WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!

_Kaiba took off his seatbelt, opened the car door, and jumped out and defensively rolled on the ground. Yami Yugi did the same as he let of of the remaining tree branch. Both Yami and Kaiba ran like their lives depended on it (which it DID) as the Jeep drove into the middle of the field made an explosion so big it damn there rocked Destiny Island!_

**Location: Gazonga Tribe : 3:01pm**

_Rex Raptor, Marik, Odion, and Mokuba are all sitting in the living room of the STILL tagged Gazonga Mansion, playing Halo 2 on XBOX. _

**Rex: **Hey, did you guys hear that?

**Marik: **yeah! It's the sound of that rocket launcher going up your ass!

**Rex: **No, demon child! It sounded like a REAL explosion… HOLY SHIT! WHOS GOT THE… FUCK ON A DUCK! I DIED AGAIN!

**Mokuba: **You SUCK, Rex

**Rex: ** Shut up you wannabe Super Saiyan 3 bitch!

_Mokuba stands up and throws his controller down._

**Mokuba: **What did you just say to me! Ooooohhhh your lucky my big brother were here! If he were…

_Rex put on some headphones and pressed play on the stereo._

**Rex: **_(singing out loud) One shot, two shot, three shots, four shots, _

_All I hear is gun shots, this is where the fun stops,_

**Marik: **_(singing) bodies drop, hit the floor, music stops, party stops, everybody hit the door,_

_Somebody's lickin shots off!_

**Odion: **Master Marik, I thought you liked Sublime… not Eminem and D12…

**Marik: **What, I cant listen to more than one type of music, Odion! Is that what your saying!

**Location : Middle of the Jungle : 3:16pm**

_Kaiba stormed angrily through the jungle, determined to find Yugi and rip his head off with his own bare hands. Now Kaiba was at a level BEYOND uber-pissed… who even know that was possible! Kaiba's mansion was a mess, he limo has been keyed, one of his favorite jeeps was blown to shit, AND to top it all off, his gun was in that explosion. Kaiba marched through the jungle, kicking rocks, squirrels, and anything else that got in his way. Finally, he found him. Yugi stood there with his game face on and his arms behind his back, looking Kaiba directly in the face._

**Kaiba: **Yugi… no one… and I mean NO ONE has ever fuckin pissed me off this much before! Do you have any IDEA how badly I wanna see you die!

_Yugi didn't answer_

**Kaiba: **ANSWER ME WHEN IM TALKING TO YOU, YOU ASS CLOWN!

**Yami Yugi: **What if I don't feel like it… NUMBER 2?

**Kaiba: **IM GONNA FUCKIN RIP YOU APART!

_Kaiba suddenly took off his long, white, rock-star like jacket, then charged at Yugi, but as soon as he got close enough, he feel into a Trap Hole! Yami Yugi pulled his hand from behind his back and flashed his Duel Disk at Kaiba as he saw him crotched over in the hole. Yugi put back on his comical grin and looked down at Kaiba_

**Yami Yugi: **_(peering inside the hole, talking in a low, monotone voice) _… I activate the trap… Trap Hole…

**Kaiba: **_(in a monotone voice) _Yugi… when I get out of this hole… your scrawny ass had better be halfway to North Africa… because when I catch you… the whole world is going to see the King of Games get MURDERED!

_As Kaiba finished his sentence, an unzipping sound is heard, followed by the dropping of pants._

**Kaiba: **Yugi… what the fuck are you doing up there?

**Yugi: **Bitch… you think you can get away with trying to run ME over with a fuckin jeep? Then to add shit to the toilet, you wanna take shots at ME! Your going to get a taste of YUGI revenge now! I hope you enjoy YELLOW SHOWERS, you hot-headed bastard!

**Kaiba: **You wouldn't dare… don't you do it… ill fuckin strangle you if you… YOU HAD BETTER NOT….

_(Camera zooms out and shows the island, as we hear Kaiba screaming in a really high pitched voice!)_

**Location : Gazonga Tribe : 4:36pm**

_Rex Raptor, Marik Ishtar, Odion, and Mokuba Kaiba waited for Kaiba to come back. He had been gone an awfully long time, and the Rewards challenge started at 5:00pm sharp. Of course, the only one who was worried was Mokuba. If Kaiba didn't show up, they would officially announce him dead and he would be automatically ejected from the show. _

**Mokuba: **Guys, I'm really worried about my brother.

**Rex: **don't worry brat. I'm sure Kaiba's gonna be back here any minute… that or he'll just wait at the Rewards Challenge without telling anybody. _(whispers to Marik and Odion) _**because that's just the kind of ungrateful bitch that he is!**

_Marik and Odion starts to snicker._

**Mokuba: **I hope your right, Rex… because if he gets eliminated off the Island, then ill just eliminate myself… I refuse to stay here without MY big brother!

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor : Gazonga tribe**

**Rex: **Ok, this is a SERIOUSLY golden opportunity! If we get rid of Kaiba's bowl-headed ass, then the annoying piece of shit brat goes too! It's a two for one deal baby! HELLS YEAH!

_Rex, Marik, and Odion all shift eager, evil grins at one another._

**Odion: **_(breaking the silence) _I wonder where Kaiba even went off to?

**Rex: **Its funny… as he left, he was coming out of that one room behind the wall again with a bunch of blueprints rolled up under his arms… I asked him where he was going and that rat-bastard said, "to your mom's house!"

_Marik and Mokuba starts to snicker. Odion tries his hardest to contain his laughter._

**Rex: **man, fuck you anal-dactyls! Anyways, then I saw him on his cell phone, and he lead a bunch of lumberjacks into the jungle, and he was driving some camaflauge colored jeep.

**Mokuba: **That's one of his favorite cars… You don't think he's…

**Marik: ** Trying to kill Yugi? Good luck! I fuckin tried everything under the sun! That bitch gives a whole new meaning to the term, "die hard"!

**Mokuba: **NO! HE'S BUILDING KAIBA LAND SAFARI ADVENTURE! MY BIG BROTHER IS SOOO COOL!

_The classic anime sweat drops drop down from the back of Rex, Marik, and Odion's heads. Rex slaps his forhead and shakes his head._

**Rex: **And YOU are SOOO fuckin dense!

_Finally the front door to the mansion busts open, and Kaiba walks in, pissed as usual, but with a VERY good reason to be. His long, rock star robe like jacket was closed. Kaiba walked straight towards the bathroom, right past his team, not saying anything to anyone._

**Mokuba: **_(runs up and hugs his brother) _Big Brother! I missed you!

**Marik: **_(to himself) _Speak for yourself!

**Rex: **_(walking towards Kaiba) _Dude, where have you been? We have to get ready for the Rewards challenge! And you better stop talking shit about my mama because that comment earlier today was TOTALLY uncalled for! I don't know what…

_Rex suddenly jumps back and covers his nose. Marik and Odion look at each other. They both pull their shirts over their noses._

**Rex: **DUDE YOU FUCKIN' STINK! WHAT HAPPENED, YOU GOT SKUNKED OR SOMETHIN'?

**Odion: **oh fuck! That shit's horrible!

**Mokuba: **HEY YOU GUYS BETTER STOP THAT! MY BROTHER… DOES NOT… STINK…

_Mokuba suddenly passed out from the stench._

**Marik: **THAT FUCKIN SMELL COULD KNOCK A DOG OFF A MOTHERFUCKIN' MEAT WAGON!

_Kaiba suddenly whips around and decks both Rex and Marik in the stomach, leaving them both on their knees holding their stomachs. He then walked to the bathroom, completely ignoring Odion. Because really… would you mess with a guy that size and that ripped? Only if you have a death wish!_

**REWARDS CHALLENGE**

**Location : Beach : 5:10pm**

_The tribes were gathered at the beach as Jeff Probst was about to announce the next challenge. At this point, Kaiba didn't care about the game anymore. Episode after Episode, Yugi made him look like a clown, and now Kaiba was ready to do something about it… however, Yugi was ONCE AGAIN one step ahead of him…_

**Jeff: **Welcome Survivors, to your next Rewards Challenge! You competed for a lifetime supply of chocolate chip cookies, and now, you will all be competing for… _(pulls a tarp off of a large box) _ A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF DORITOS!

_The Pootietang and Gazonga tribes both "ooh"ed and "aah"ed. _

**Joey: **Hey Probst… what kind of Doritos are we talkin' ova here?

**Jeff: **Nacho Cheese, Spicy Nacho, Cool Ranch, Salsa, Ranchero, Guacamole, Four Cheese, and …

**Tristan: **Salsa Verde!

_Jeff nods his head._

**Joey and Tristan: **HOODY HOO! _(They both slap 5)_

**Jeff: **This Rewards Challenge is a simple arm wrestling match… however, Yugi and Kaiba are forbidden to enter. Not just because of the fact that they did the first one, but it seems Yugi has put a restraining order on Kaiba…

_(A Group of police officers surrounded Yugi as he pointed to Kaiba, smiled brightly, and flipped him off.)_

**Kaiba: **YOU STAR HEADED BITCH! YOU CANT HIDE BEHIND THE FUCKIN LAW FOREVER!

**Yami Yugi: ** Wanna bet?

**Kaiba: **If I have to, ill run for President just to kill your ass!

**Yami Yugi: **Hey Genius, not only are you already a president, but we live in JAPAN… not AMERICA! Dumbass.

**Kaiba: **YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHEN TO SHUT THE FUCK UP, DO YOU?

_Kaiba tried to charge at Yugi, but his team pulled him back… that and the fact that the cops had guns pointed at Kaiba at that very moment._

**Jeff: **Okaaaay… anyways, tribes, pick your representative.

_Everyone huddled together as they talked amoungst themselves. Finally, Mako and Odion stepped forward, and sat at the table that was placed for this event. The table was a professional arm wrestling table with the two bars sticking out of it for gripping with the other hand. Mako and Odion tightly gripped each other's hands and stared each other in the eye._

**Odion: **Your fuckin goin down, Fish boy!

**Mako: **the DAMN I will! The fisherman of the sea will NOT lose to a bald bitch with pubic hair sticking out the back of his head!

_Jeff grabs both of their clutched-together hands._

**Jeff: **Survivors ready… GO!

_Jeff quickly lets go as they both try as hard as they could to get each other's hand down. They were both evenly matched as the hands went from left, to right, to left, to right. Shouts of encouragement came from both sides as sweat started to fall from both of their faces. The excitement from the match and the craving for the chips was starting to get to Joey._

**Joey: **_(has his right fist balled up and thinking to himself) Man, I gotta do somethin' to help Mako win… (suddenly, a sly grin shot across his face) I KNOW! (Out loud) _OH MY GOD! ODION LOOK! ISHIZU IS BARE-ASS NAKED ON THE BEACH WITH HER LEGS SPREAD WIDE OPEN!

**Rex: **_(Looking around like crazy) _OH MY FUCKIN GOD, WHERE!

**Odion:** _(quickly whips around, completely forgetting about the match) _WHAT! MISS ISHIZU! HAVE YOU NO SHAME! COVER UP RIGHT THIS…

**SLAM!**

_Mako slammed Odion's hand down._

**Jeff: **And Mako wins the Rewards Challenge! The Pootietang tribe once again takes the prize!

_Joey and Tristan quickly runs up and grabs the huge box of Doritos, then takes off running as Marik and Odion chase them down_

**Marik: **YOU STUPID BLONDE BITCH! YOU WANNA TALK VULGAR ABOUT MY SISTER? FUCK YOU!

_Everyone else stared at amazement. Jeff slapped his forehead and grabbed a walkie talkie out of his back pocket._

**Jeff: **_(groaning) _Someone fuckin call security!

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Marik Ishtar : Gazonga Tribe**

**Marik: **Forget Yugi! That bitch Joey Wheeler is gonna pay! Disrespectin my family like that is a one-way trip to the Shadow Realm! Never mind, its cool. Ill just have to bone HIS sister! Then we'll see who has the last laugh! Laughing

**Immunity Challenge, baby!**

**Location : Beach : 6:10pm**

_Both Tribes are once again gathered as Jeff stands before them with an envelop._

**Jeff: **Ok Survivors… today's Immunity Challenge is gonna be different. It seems you guys have done a good job entertaining the world!

_The tribes hooted and hollered._

**Jeff: **CBS studios recently had an idea board on their website, where fans would mail in what they want to see as the next Immunity Challenge, so we pulled this print out at random. It comes from Jake Thompson in Des Moines, Iowa. He writes…

"_The survivors should have to guess how big Mai's jugs are.**"**_

**Mai: **WHAT THE FUCK?

**Jeff: **Um… ok, you heard the letter… the first person to guess how big Mai's… rack… is, their tribe wins the Immunity. Survivors ready…

**Mai: **Wait, don't I get a say in this!

**Jeff: **No. GO!

**Yami Yugi: **36c?

**Tristan: **Hell no, those are Ds!

**Odion: **38d?

**Joey: **_(crosses his arms and closes his eyes) _You're ALL wrong! Mai's rack is …

**Rex: **38DD!

_Everyone looked at Rex, shocked._

**Jeff: **Mai… is that right?

**Mai: **… Yes it is… HOW THE FUCK DID YOU KNOW THAT, RAPTOR!

**Rex: **_(closes his eyes and crosses his arms) _What the eyes cant see, is all clear to me!

**Jeff: **OK, the Gazonga Tribe wins Immunity! Pootietang Tribe, meet back at the Tribal Council for a Tribal Meeting.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Mai Valentine : Pootietang Tribe**

**Mai: **I don't know how that creepy little dino-nerd knew my breast size, but they clearly won that challenge by luck! Wait, now that I think about it, I thought I saw someone going through my drawers at night, but I was too half sleep to know who It was… then when I woke up, my bras were all over the place… THAT SON OF A BITCH!

_Mai storms off camera, then is stopped by 2 guards, saying she cant enter Gazonga territory_

**Location : Tribal Council : 9:13pm**

_The Pootietang tribe stands before Jeff and the voting box as they hold their torches._

**Jeff: **OK Pootietang, you all know the drill. Since you lost the immunity challenge, you will have to vote someone off of your team. So rather than explain, just get right to it. Yugi, if u please.

_Yami Yugi walks over to the vote box and scribbles a name down, then drops it inside._

**Yami Yugi: **Sorry Bakura… it's the size of the boat, not the motion in the ocean. I hope you understand… wait a minute, what the fuck did I just say?

_As Yami Yugi walks back to his tribe, Mai walks in, then Joey, then Tristan, then Bakura, then Mako. Jeff then takes the box and reads off the votes_

**Jeff: **Ok, we have one for Bakura… another for Bakura… one for Tristan… and another for Bakura… and one for Joey… ok Bakura, bring me your torch.

_Bakura gives his torch to Jeff, who turns around and pisses on it, then throws the burned out torch away._

**Jeff: **Your tribe has spoken. We thank you for surviving this long. As for the rest of you, go back to camp and rest… you have a busy day ahead of you tomorrow.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Bakura Ryou**

**Bakura: **So I got voted off… its ok I guess. I'm tired of living like an outcast anyways… now I can go back home and work on my dream… a new tabletop RPG! I mean, it'll be bigger than Dungeon Dice Monsters! But then again, that game sucks mass amount of donkey balls anyways! I've seen 3 year olds who can come up with a better game than that!

**And another one bites the dust. A new challenge arises for our survivors, but what…? Find out next time on Survivor: Duelist Style!**

**Hope you all enjoyed… please R&R.**


	6. Vital Idol

Hey hows it going? I just wanted to take a moment to thank everyone for the nice reviews that you left me! I'm glad u have as much fun reading them as I do writing… er, typing them. Well I got all my work done, and my baseball game was cancelled today cuz the other school is having problems getting here… (bastards are just scared… and quite frankly, I don't blame them!) (laughing) so here we go with episode, or chappie 6! Hope you enjoy! Lets do it to it!

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

_**Commercial**_

_Tonight's presentation of Survivor: Duelist Style! Is brought to you by… Anubis Mini-Markets!_

_Got a craving for Hamburgers? Hot dogs? Potato Chips? Cookies? Ice cream? TV Dinners? No matter what you crave, you'll find it at Anubus Mini-Markets! Come on down and get some refreshments while you watch… or read in some cases… tonight's installment of Survivor!_

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_**End**_

_Joey, Tristan, and Mai are sitting in front of the tiny, ghetto black and white tv, each eating a bag of Doritos._

**Joey: **Check that out! Were getting so big that we actually have a sponcer now!

**Tristan: **Yeah… but what the hell did he mean by read? Is that susposed to be for Braille or the deaf who reads closed captioning?

**Joey: **Maybe he means that this is actually some story posted on one of those fan fiction sites for other people to read… _(laughing) _

**Mai: **Please Joey, that would be fuckin' stupid! Who in there right mind would write a story about US of all people crossed over with a boring ass reality tv show?

**Tristan: **Someone not in his right mind, that's for damn sure… as a matter of fact, it sounds like a 17 year old school boy from California who also plays softball and is a shortstop might have written something like that!

**Joey: **_(balls up his empty bag of chips and pulls out another one) _Man, just don't let ME catch him in a dark alley… writing some bullshit like that! _(cracks his knuckles)_

**Mai: **_(looks at her watch)_ Holy shit! Come on, its time to start the show!

_The three of them throw down their chips and takes off running._

**Joey: **Jeff said there's gonna be something big today! I cant wait to see what it is!

**10 duelists are left and another one will soon be docked out…. But who will it be? Find out today on:**

**Survivor: Outwit, Outplay, Outlast**

**Duelist Style!**

**Location: Middle of the Island : 1:00pm**

_Jeff Probst has gathered the Pootietang Tribe and the Gazonga Tribe to deliver a special messege._

**Jeff: **OK everyone, you'll be happy to know that Survivor is now the top rated reality show on prime time tv!

_Everyone cheers_

**Jeff: **I have no idea how you did it… maybe it's the fact that you're all Duelists… maybe it's the fact that you all cuss every other sentence…

**Yami Yugi: **Or maybe it's the fact that Kaiba is a crybaby bitch!

**Kaiba: **Or It could be the fact that you're a butt pirate!

**Jeff: **HEY! HEY! Not now! Anyways, in order to keep the ratings up, we decided to do something special for tonight's show.

**Tristan: **Something like what?

_Jeff points behind him, where there are CBS maintenance working on what looks like a stage, and logs for seating._

**Marik: **What the hizzle?

**Jeff: **Tonight's Immunity Challenge is going to be so big, we wont have time to have a Rewards Challenge!

**Rex: **No Rewards Challenge, huh? This must be pretty damn big… so what is it, are we gonna put on a fuckin talent show or something?

**Jeff: **Close, Jurassic ass…

_Jeff points upwards to see three transport copters landing on another part of Destiny Island. The doors open and waves and waves of fan girls pour out. Rex grows weak in the knees and grabs Marik's shirt._

**Rex: **_(really fast) _OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! LOOK AT ALL THOSE GIRLS!

_Each of the girls are shouting and waving to the Duelists_

**Rex: **Jeff… I love you in the most NONSEXUAL way possible!

**Joey: **Tristan! Check out the ass on that brunette over there coming off the plane!

**Tristan: **Forget her! Look at the titties on that blonde over there!

**Marik: ** Please… please… PLEASE tell me that the Immunity Challenge is a large group orgy!

**Odion: **Um, Master… that would be more like a Rewards Challenge…

**Marik: **Shut up Odion… your fucking up my fantasy…

**Jeff: **Ok boys, calm yourselves down… to keep Survivor looking fresh, we put an add on the CBS website.. to all the young ladies ages 14 to 18, if they wanted to be on a live showing of Survivor for the newest Immunity Challenge… and that challenge is you, the Duelist, will have to entertain these young ladies… on that stage over there…

**Mokuba: **No problem! All I have to do is do my tumbling act and…

**Jeff: **No Mokuba… with your singing  skills!

_The Duelists were dead silent for a good minute. Finally, Rex, being Rex of course, broke the silence…_

**Rex: **I don't have a problem with singing, but seriously, I'm with Marik's idea of having a giant orgy!

**Marik: **Hells yeah!

_Rex and Marik slaps five_

**Jeff: **No orgies! We're you two not listening… a majority of these girls are MINORS!

**Rex: **Hey, these are international waters, Probst… what happens on this Island STAYS on this island!

**Marik: **_(drops to his knees) _ OH TESTIFY!

**Jeff: ** _(shocked look on his face) _You two are a couple of sick, sick fucks! I just want you both to know that

**Mai: **Rex, you're a fuckin pervert! Don't think your getting your T-Rex lookin ass off this island without my foot being broken off in it!

**Rex: **Hey! Don't be mad at me just cuz I got your boob size right!

_Joey and Tristan and Mako hold Mai back from charging at Rex._

**Yami Yugi: **The orgy wouldn't work anyways! I mean we all know that Kaiba is gay, so…

**Kaiba: **GO TO HELL!

_Kaiba charges at Yami Yugi, but stops when he holds up his restraining order papers._

**Yami Yugi: **Touch me and ill have your ass hauled to Juve… and by this time tomorrow you'll be taking it in the ass!

_Kaiba then had a diabolical smile on his face._

**Yami Yugi: **Did you hear me bitch?

**Kaiba: **Yes fucker… I heard you.

**Yami Yugi: **THEN FUCKIN GET MAD WHEN I INSULT YOU, SCARECROW!

_Kaiba responded with a middle finger._

**Jeff: **Ok survivors, you have til 9pm tonight to have a song. You will be judged on originality, creativity, choreography, and how well you perform as a team. So we'll see you back here at 9 sharp!

_And so, the tribes went back to their camp sites… Odion had to drag Rex from staring at the girls on the other side of the island. Yami Yugi was worried… had Kaiba finally learned to ignore all of his insults? Or was he planning another crazy ass stunt in an attempt to kill him? Whatever the reason, Yugi didn't have time to worry about that… a new challenge had arose as he must perform in front of millions and millions of people around the world, and in front of thousands of fan girls. _

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Yugi Muto : Pootietang Tribe Leader**

**Yami Yugi: **Im gettin' too old for this shit… I mean, I know I look like a 15 year old boy, and I don't have much memory of my days in ancient Egypt, but what I DO know is that I never had to do some bullshit like performing in front of a group of people… but if it's to help my team, ill gladly do it!

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 2:15pm**

_The Pootietang tribe had a buttload of CDs all over the floor as they decided with song they wanted to do._

**Mako: **I know what we can sing!

_Everyone looks at him._

**Mako: **_(singing) Yo ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me! Yo ho Yo ho…_

**Mai: **_(interrupting him) _HOW ABOUT we sing No Doubt? We've got the right amount of people.

**Joey: **Hey, you DO look kinda like Gwen Stefani!

**Mai: **_(blushing and smiling) _Really Joey?

**Joey: **PSH! FUCK NO! _(laughs like crazy)_

**Mai: ** YOU STUPID SON OF A BASTARD!

_Mai dives over the CD and on top of Joey and starts whaling on him._

**Mako: ** DAYMN!

**Tristan: **Anyways, I think we should do some Linkin Park

**Mako: **_(singing) Sailing, Sailing, over the bounding bay…_

**Yami Yugi: **They said we have to be original, right?

**Tristan and Mako: **Yeah…

**Yami Yugi: **Fuck! This is gonna be hard!

**Mai: **_(takes a break from pounding on Joey to turn and look at Yugi) _ I'm telling you… No fuckin' Doubt… we'll win for sure!

**Tristan: **No way! That's not original at all… I bet the people watching… or "reading" probably saw that and is like, "oh, blonde girl with a group of guys… they're gonna do No Doubt!".

**Joey: **Tristan's… right…

**Mai: **Who the FUCK said you could talk! _(Continues to whale on him again)_

**Yami Yugi:** This is complete and utter bullshit! We have to find a song and have it down in a span of 8 hours? Who do these fuckin producers think we are!

**Mako: **Well, we are spoiled when we worked at 4Kids…

**Yami Yugi: ** _(cringes) _Don't EVER mention that god-forsaken company in my presence EVER AGAIN!

**Mako: ** Oh… sorry! _(starts to drink his fruit punch)_

**Location: Gazonga Tribe Mansion : 2:45pm**

_The Gazongas were having no better luck than the Pootietang as they struggled to come up with a song to win the Immunity._

**Marik: **Come on guys… you KNOW you wanna do it!

**Rex: **Marik… you fuckin played Sublime out… just LET IT GO!

**Marik: **… Bitches…

**Odion: **I know I don't know much about today's young ladies, but we should do something that caters to them.

**Kaiba: **Odion is right… and I know just how to do it.

_The Gazonga Tribe all looked at Kaiba with anticipation. Kaiba cocked his eyebrow._

**Kaiba: **what the hell are you all lookin at?

**Rex: **Come on Kaiba, were your team! Let us in on the secret.

**Kaiba: **Raptor, what the FUCK are you talking about?

**Mokuba: **Rex means whats your big plan to kill Yugi this week?

**Kaiba: **_(closes his eyes and crosses his arms) _hmph! I've got better things to do right now than worry about that star-headed jackass. Like us winning this challenge! Now, I know JUST what were going to do… follow me.

_Everyone looked at one another, then got up and followed Kaiba to one of the rooms, then the doors slammed shut on the cameras. The scene shifts into the trailor of Jeff Probst. Jeff is on the phone talking to one of the heads at CBS._

**Jeff: **Yeah, this whole American Idol spoof was a great idea sir! I mean, the Duelists are probably shittin bricks right now back at their camp sites, but our ratings are gonna go beyond the heavens!

_Yami Yugi, Joey, and Tristan enters the trailor._

**Jeff: **Sir, ill have to call you back. A couple of the Pootietang members just walked in…. ok….. yeah… buh-bye _(he hangs up the phone) _Whats up boys? What can I do for you.

**Joey: **we've got a little problem…

**Yami Yugi: **Its Mai. She doesn't want to go on.

**Tristan: **She's being a stuck up bitch because we wont fuckin perform No Doubt.

**Jeff: **Not a problem. We'll get you someone to perform in Mai's place.

_Yugi, Joey, and Tristan all shot huge grins on their faces. _

**Joey: **THAT'S what we wanted to talk to you about!

**Tristan: **Yugi has someone in mind, but we need your ok on it.

**Jeff: **alright… who is he?

_Yami walks over and whispers in Jeff's ear._

**Jeff: **ARE YOU FUCKIN SERIOUS!

_All 3 of them nods their heads._

**Jeff: **Yugi… you know that…

**Yami Yugi: **_(Interrupting him) _Jeff, I am FULLY aware of a certain bowl-headed bastard getting pissed off.

**Jeff: **ok… then its settled.

**Yami, Joey, and Tristan: ** Thanks Jeff!

_They all leave the trailor, giggling to themselves._

**Jeff: **Psh… Yugi just DOESN'T know when to quit…

**Immunity Challenge! A Gala Event!**

**Location: Middle of the Island : 9:00pm**

_And so, the time approached as the fan girls were all seated at the stage, cheering and screaming loudly. There were searchlights all around. Jeff entered the stage as the fan girls went crazy._

**Jeff: **To all the lovely ladies in the audience, and all our wonderful viewers watching at home, and lets not forget those that are "reading" us, welcome to the Immunity Challenge! As you know, The Duelists will momentarily be on stage, giving you the performance of a lifetime!

_(The rants and raves from the girls grew louder and louder as they chanted for Yugi, then Kaiba, then Joey, then Mako… basically everyone but Mai.) _

**Jeff: **Is Everybody ready?

_(Cheers got louder and louder)_

**Jeff: **alright then! Ladies and Gentlemen, Led by Seto Kaiba, we have Rex Raptor, Mokuba Kaiba, Marik Ishtar, and Odion… GIVE IT UP FOR THE GAZONGA TRIBE!

_Each member of the Gazonga tribe were all dressed trendy. They each wore the same thing… gray slacks, white and black tennis shoes, a shirt with a vest, and a trendy hat. The girls went crazy. Some fainted at the sight of Kaiba. Rex could barely keep his cool. _

**Rex: **OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! Marik, I cant take it any longer! IM GOING IN!

**Marik: **Whoa, whoa, whoa there tiger! Just remember after we win the Immunity, there's gotta be groupies backstage waiting for us!

**Rex: **… Groupies?

_Marik nods his head._

**Rex: **I've waited for this for so long… IM GONNA GET LAID!

**Jeff: **Now ladies and Gentlemen… led by Yugi Muto, we have Joey Wheeler, Tristan Taylor, Mako Tsunami, and, because Mai Valentine suddenly got a fever, replacing her will be… none other than… NOAH KAIBA!

**Kaiba: **WHAT THE HELL? WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE SHIT? WHAT THE DAMN!

_The Pootietang tribe each came out, not wearing the same thing, but each member were dressed in hip-hop wear. Yami Yugi sporting Ecko, Joey was sporting Vokal, Tristan was sporting Roca Wear, Mako was sporting Enyce, and Noah was sporting Sean Paul. The girls went even crazier for Yugi and his team than they did for Kaiba's team. Girls even tried to rush the stage, but was stopped by Security._

**Kaiba: **WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS LITTLE UNGRATEFUL PISSANT DOING HERE!

**Noah: **Hi Seto! I've missed you so much! How come you never email me or anything? That's fucked up, man!

**Kaiba: **ONLY THING THAT'S GETTING FUCKED UP AROUND HERE IS YOU AND THAT BITCH STANDING NEXT TO YOU!

**Noah: **_(laughing) _Wow Yugi! You were right! Seto IS pissed!

**Yugi: **I told you, didn't I? _(laughing)_

**Jeff: **Ok, Gazongas, your first! Remember that you will be judged on originality, creativity, choreography, and how well you perform as a team! SO GIVE THESE PEOPLE ONE HELL OF A SHOW!

**Kaiba: **_(to his team) _You heard the man, boys. Lets rock this bitch!

**Gazonga Tribe: **YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHH BABY!

_The Gazonga Tribe lines up side by side as the music as music suddenly plays. The Gazonga Tribe began to dance as if they were mirror images of each other. _

_(Sing to the tune of New Kids on the Block's "The Right Stuff" please don't hate me for this… by they way, they are all singing this, so I don't need to note that they are.)_

**Kaiba: **_First time was a great time  
_

**Rex: **_Second time was a blast_

**Marik: **_Third time I fell in love, now I hope it lasts  
_

**Mokuba: **_I can see it in your walk, tell it when _you_ talk  
_

**Odion: **_See it in everything you do, even in your thoughts_

**Kaiba: **_You got the right stuff, baby, love the way you turn me on  
_

**Rex: **_You got the right stuff, baby, your the reason why I sing this song_

_(The fan girls are screaming like crazy. A group of girls faints as Rex winks at them.)_

**Kaiba: **_All that I needed was you…  
_

**Gazonga Tribe: **_Oh girl your so right…  
_

**Kaiba: **_And all that i wanted was you…  
_

**Gazonga Tribe: **_It made all my (dreams come true)  
_

_Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
THE RIGHT STUFF!_

_Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
THE RIGHT STUFF!_

**Kaiba: **_Your first kiss was a sweet kiss  
_

**Rex: **_Second kiss had a twist  
_

**Marik: **_Third and your fourth kiss, I don't want to miss  
_

**Mokuba: **_I can see it in your walk, tell it when you talk  
_

**Odion: **_See it in everything you do, even in your thoughts  
_

**Kaiba: **_You got the right stuff, baby, love the way you turn me on  
_

**Rex: **_You got the right stuff, baby, your the reason why I sing this song_

**Kaiba: **_All that I needed was you…  
_

**Gazonga Tribe: **_Oh girl your so right…  
_

**Kaiba: **_And all that i wanted was you…  
_

**Gazonga Tribe: **_It made all my (dreams come true)  
_

_Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
THE RIGHT STUFF!_

_Oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh  
THE RIGHT STUFF_

**SONG ENDS**

_The Crowd goes crazy as the Gazonga Tribe ends with a suave pose… Rex, Mokuba, and Marik are down on one knee pointed towards a random girl on the left, front, and right of them, while Kaiba and Odion are pointing straight forward. Jeff ran on stage._

**Jeff: **Ladies, give it up for the Gazonga Tribe!

_The crowd continues to cheer like crazy, chanting each member of the Gazonga Tribe's names_

**Yami Yugi: **_(from back stage) _I told you all Kaiba was gay… what straight guy uses a BOY BAND for a gimmick?

**Tristan: **… dude… did they just fuckin sing New Kids on the Block?

**Joey: **I'm not even going to respond to that… the Gay-dar is going through the roof right now.

**Mako: **_(singing) Oh oh oh oh oh! Oh oh oh oh! Oh oh oh oh oh! THE RIGHT STUFF! _I don't know, I kinda enjoyed it!

_Everyone gives Mako a shocked look._

**Mako: **Just kidding…

**Noah: **Um, anyways, its our turn next… im kinda nervous… no matter how gay that was, it was still pretty good.

**Joey: **Don't sweat it, kiddo! If the girls loved that garbage, they're gonna get swept off their feet to OUR routine!

**Noah: **I hope your right, Joey…

_Back on stage…_

**Jeff: **That's gonna be a tough act to follow! Alright ladies and gentlemen, give it up for THE POOTIETANG TRIBE!

_The stands blow up as Yugi and his team enters the stage and the Gazonga tribe walks off. Jeff turns to Yugi and his friends._

**Jeff: **Ok guys, im sure I don't have to repeat the rules to you, so give these girls something to shake what their mamas gave em!

**Pootietang Tribe: ** RIGHT ON, JEFF!

**Jeff: **Survivors ready?

_Jeff walks off stage and past the Gazonga tribe. _

**Jeff: **Hey, where did Seto go?

**Rex: **What the piss! He was here just a second ago?

_The music begins to play as the Pootietang Tribe lines up side by side, but instead of dancing in sync, they each started to break dance. Each time Yugi made a dance move, something hit the floor next to his feet. Yugi was so into the music, he didn't even notice it. Each move he made, another hole in the stage appeared._

_(Another singing scene everybody! This one you wanna sing to the turn of the D12/Eminem song, My Band… and yeah, the Pootietang tribe is singing.)_

**Yami Yugi:_ (talking) _ **_I don't know dude. I think everybody is all jealous and shit  
cause I'm like the lead singer of the band dude.  
And I think, everybody's got a fuckin' problem with me dude,  
and they need to take it up with me after the show._

_Because. . ._

_**(singing) (this is the chorus)**  
These chicks don't even know the name of my band,  
But they're all on me like they want to hold hands,  
'Cause once I blow they'll know that I'll be the man,  
all because I'm the lead duelist of my band._

_  
_**Yami Yugi: **_So I get offstage right? I drop the mic,  
Walk up to these hot chicks then I'm all like,  
"Sup, ladies, my name's Yugi Muto,  
I'm the main character in Yu-Gi-Oh, you know?" They're all like  
"Oh my god it's him, Becky oh my fucking god it's really him!"  
"I swear to fucking God dude, you fucking rock,  
Please Yugi please let me suck your cock"  
_

_Now right now, the rest of the fellas get jealous,  
Specially when I drop the beat and play my Dark Magician!  
All the chicks start yelling, all the hot babes  
throw their bras and their shirts and their panties onstage,  
So like every single night them people fight with me,  
But when we fight it's kind a like sibling rivalry,  
Cause their back on stage the next night with me,.  
Dude, I just think you're trying to steal the light from me.  
Yesterday Joey tried to pull a knife on me,  
Cause I told him Mai Valentine's my wife-to-be.  
This duelist shit's the life for me,  
and all the other guys just despise me because. . ._

_Chorus_

_  
My band! (8x)  
My Bbbbbbbaaaaaaannnnnnnddddddd!  
Baby yeah!_

**Noah: **_You just want to see a duelist backwards don't you?  
Ain't that? How come we don't duel off pro school?  
Smash these vocals and do a performance,  
but we in a van, and he on a tour bus.  
You don't want my autograph, you'se a liar,  
and naw, I'm Noah, "Oh, I thought you were Seto."  
And what the hell is wrong with our dressing room?  
Cause our shit is looking smaller than a decimal.  
See, I know how to rap, it's simple but,  
all I did was read a Russell Simmons book.  
So I'm more intact, trying to get on the map,  
doing jumping jacks while getting whipped on my back_

_  
_**Joey: **_Look at Yuge little punk ass, thinking he the shit  
_

**Tristan: **_Yeah I know man, by himself takin' all the flicks.  
_

**Joey: **_Hey, I thought we had and interview with DJ Shortstop Clue?  
_

**Yami Yugi: **_No I had an interview, not you two.  
_

**Tristan: **_You gon' be late for soundcheck  
_

**Joey: **_Man, I ain't going to soundcheck  
_

**Tristan: **_Man, our duel disk is screwed up,  
_

**Joey: **_And his always work best! You know what man? I'm a say something! Ay'yo Yuge!_

**Yami Yugi: **_You got something to say!  
_

**Joey: **_Man, no._

**Tristan: **_I though you was about tell him off man, wassup?  
_

**Joey: **_Man, I'm a tell him when I feel like it man, shut up! You ain't even back me up, and we supposed to be crew!  
_

**Tristan: **_Man I was about to talk right after you, I swear  
_

**Joey: **_Man whatever!  
_

**Tristan: **_I swear man!_

_Chorus_

_  
_**Mako: **_God damn it, I'm sick of this show,  
Time for me to go solo and make some loot.  
I told you I made the beats, and wrote all the raps,  
Till Espa Roba, slipped me some crack.  
Duelist Kingdom Tournament? I was in the back.  
Battle City Tournament? I was in the back.  
For the media, I got some suggestions,  
Fuck Yugi, ask us some questions.  
Like "Who's Mako Tsunami?", "How he get started?"  
_

_**(in a high pitch voice) **But what about Yugi Muto?  
_

_Bitch are you retarded?  
Anyway, I'm the poverished guy on the show.  
Big ass stomach, bitches think I'm cute.  
Shortstop told me to do sit-ups to get buff,  
Did 2 and a half, then couldn't get up.  
Fuck Yu-Gi-Oh, I'm off of this show,  
I'm gonna start a group with the Real Roxanne._

_(Music Changes):_

**Yami Yugi: **_Girl why can't you see your the only one for me and it just  
tears my ass apart to know that you don't know my shooooooooow!  
_

**Joey: **_Man, fuck this! LETS GET DOWN_

_(The boys break dances again)_

_  
_**Yami Yugi: **_I'm the leader of my band.  
I get all the girls to take off their underpants.  
I'm the lead singer of my band.  
My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance.  
My salsa. Look out for my next single, it's called my salsa.  
My salsa, seltzer, salsa, salsa.  
My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance  
and take off their underpants.  
My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance  
and take off their underpants. My salsa._

_Where'd everybody go?_

**End of song!**

_The crowd went crazy as the song ended and each member of the Pootietang Tribe all posed side by side next to each other again, but they stole the Gazonga Tribe's Point. As the Cheers started to die down, Yami Yugi crouched down and took a deep breath. The minute he crouched, something whizzed passed his head. _

**Yami Yugi: **The fuck was that?

_That was when he noticed that the stage was riddled with what looked like bullet holes. The pattern was obvious as the each hole was only in an area where Yugi was standing. He dove off the stage just in time, as 10 more sets of bullets connected to the stage. _

**Yami Yugi: **KAIBA!

_High in a tree, Kaiba was dressed in camaflauged clothing and wore the camaflauged face paint. He was holding a sniper rifle and was shooting at Yugi throughout his performance!_

**Kaiba: **Fuckin bitch! Why don't you stay still?

_Kaiba looked through the scope to see that Yugi was nowhere in sight. _

**Kaiba: **Son of a motherless bitch! Where the fuck did he go this time!

_He caught a glimpse of Noah in the scope. A HUGE, evil smile shot across his face._

**Kaiba: **SOMEBODY IS FUCKIN EATIN LEAD TONIGHT!

_Back on the stage…_

**Jeff: **Ladies, now its time for you to pick the winner! Give it up for… the Gazonga Tribe!

_The fan girls go crazy with applauds and shouts_

**Jeff: **and now, give it up for… The Pootietang tribe!

_The fan girls go crazy with applauds and shouts once again. However, a huge bullet whizzed by and caught Noah right in the head! He feel down dead. Everyone gasped._

**Joey: **OH MY GOD! THEY KILLED NOAH!

**Tristan: ** YOU BASTARDS!

**Jeff: **Only one person could have done this… KAIBA!

_Kaiba hid in the tree._

**Jeff: **Sorry Gazongas, but because your team captain killed a member of the opposite team… THE POOTIETANG TRIBE WINS THE IMMUNITY!

_The fan girls blow up as the sounds of cheering and shouting is heard throughout Destiny Island._

**Rex: **OH MY GOD! THAT'S BULLSHIT!

**Mokuba: **Yeah, you have no proof that my brother did this!

_Jeff took out a pair of tongs, then turned Noah's dead body over, and pulled the bullet out of his head. He took out a rag and wiped the blood off the bullet to reveal a Kaiba Corp. Logo on the bullet._

**Mokuba: **_(sighing) _Never mind…

_Jeff turned to the crowd. _

**Jeff: **We've prepared cabins for all of you to sleep til we fly you all home tomorrow! CBS Security will escort you all there! We hope you enjoyed the Immunity challenge! As for the Pootietang tribe, you may go back to your campsite… where Groupies are waiting for you.

_With that said, Joey, Tristan, and Mako take off running toward their campsite. _

**Jeff: **Gazonga Tribe, ill see you in an hour for a Council Meeting.

_The Gazonga tribe walked off pissed off. Jeff turned to see Little Yugi standing behind him._

**Jeff: **Um, everything ok Yugi?

**Yugi: **… Kaiba's still out there… can I … sleep in your cabin tonight?

**Jeff: **Sure… but no sharing a bed… I'm not no Michael Jackson.

**Yugi: **Oh hell no! do I look like Kaiba to you? I like chicks, not dicks.

**Location: Tent in the middle of the Jungle : An hour before the Tribal Council**

_Rex Raptor is in a tent with 5 of the thousands of fan girls that were in the crowd._

**Rex: **And that's my story. That little fuck-bug Weevil is always trying to steal MY glory… the only reason he even did this show was because he knew I signed up for it!

**Girl #1: **wow… your like, so brave for everything you've been through!

**Girl #2: **yeah… and I think YOUR tribe should have won that concert… not that other tribe.

**Rex: **Yeah, that's how its been on this island… _(he wraps his arms around 2 of the girls) _Its just been bullshit after bullshit after bullshit after bullshit.

**Girl # 3: **Well tonight, we're going to take all that pain away from you!

_Rex is now sweating bullets_

**Rex: _(thinking) _**this is it… this is it… this is fuckin IT! All the bullshit I've gone through in life has ALL lead up to this moment!

**Girl #4: **but, don't you have to go to your tribal council?

**Rex: **That's not for another hour… I mean… 3 hours!

**Girl #5: **Good enough for me. Lets do it!

**Rex: _(thinking) _**YEEEEEEEAAAHH BABY!

_Just as Rex was a split second away from engaging in a 6-way kiss, Mokuba busts in the tent!_

**Mokuba: **Daddy!

_He rushes up and dives on Rex, hugging him_

**Rex: **WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

**Fan Girls: **DADDY?

**Rex: **Do not listen to him! I am NOT this kid's father! I wouldn't want anything to do with this little piece of shit! I don't know him, I've never met him, hell, I've never even SEEN this kid until now! HE DOESN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE ME FOR CRYIN OUT LOUD!

**Girl #2: **Wasn't he on stage with you?

**Mokuba: **Daddy… please don't deny me again… I'm sorry I wasn't born a girl so you could have incest with me!

**Rex: _(in a bitter voice) _ **Mokuba, I am going to STRANGLE you! GET… OUT…!

**Mokuba: **Please don't cheat on mommy again! She already tried to cut herself the last time you did that… and the time before that… and the time before that!

**Girl #1: **Rex Raptor, what kind of human being are you?

**Rex: **Baby! Baby! You have got to believe me! This kid is lying out of his ass!

**Mokuba: _(with fake tears in his eyes) _** Daddy… I knew you would try to deny it again, so I brought our family pictures… maybe you'll come around…

_Mokuba shows the girls pictures that were made from a picture program on a computer. They looked like real portraits. The first picture is of Rex, Mokuba, and Ishizu Ishtar taking a Sunday photo (everyone is all dressed up). The next is of Rex and Mokuba playing catch. The next is of Rex and Ishizu taking a wedding picture (Rex is in a tuxedo and Ishizu is in a wedding dress) with a messege on the back that says, "Ill always love you, my sweet Rexy-pie… Ishizu", and the final one is of Rex and Ishizu dropping Mokuba off at school._

**Fan Girls: _(looking at the pictures) _** Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww…

**Girl #5: **Rex Raptor, you are the biggest jerk on the face of the earth!

**Girl #3: **I hope you get hit by a car and die and satin sticks a pitch fork in your eye!

**Rex: **THIS IS BLASPHEMY! HOW IN THE BLUE FUCK DID YOU GET THESE PICTURES! **_(to the fan girls) _**THEY ARENT REAL! IVE NEVER EVEN MET THIS WOMAN BEFORE!

**Girl #4: **I wouldn't fuck you if u were the last cock on earth!

_Each of the fan girls started to pummel Rex, then they angrily left the tent._

**Girl #1: **Come on girls! Lets sneak into the Pootietang Tribe! That whole rap performance was HOT!

**Girl #3: **Totally!

_Inside the Tent, Mokuba laughs like crazy._

**Mokuba: _(laughs) _**Come on Rex! Seto was looking for you! We have need to team up and vote off either Marik or Odion… just the 3 of us!

**Rex: _(fighting back tears of anger) _**YOU LITTLE BLOODY TAMPON! ILL KILL YOU!

_Both of them rushes out of the tent at break-neck speeds. Mokuba dashes past the fan girls, followed by Rex in hot pursuit._

**Girl #4: **Yeah, make up for lost times all you want, Rex! There's NO WAY were going to fuck you still!

**Mokuba: **COME ON REX! IT WAS FUNNY! YOU KNOW IT WAS TOO! **_(laughs like crazy)_**

**Rex: **WHEN I CATCH YOU THE ONLY FUNNY SITE AROUND HERE IS GONNA BE YOUR BLOODY BODY TURNED INSIDE OUT!

**Location : Tribal Council : 11:30pm**

_The Gazonga Tribe stands before Jeff Probst awaiting the chance to vote. Mokuba is standing next to Kaiba. He waves at Rex, who retailiates by flipping up his middle finger._

**Jeff: **Ok Gazongas, since you lost the Immunity Challenge, thanks to a certain trigger-happy leader, you must now decide who you want voted off your tribe. But before we start, Rex, you do know that 4Kids Entertainment really is behind the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, right?

**Rex: **Yep. Sure do.

**Jeff: **And do you have something you want to say to 4Kids?

**Rex: **Yes I do. FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID CHILDISH BASTARDS! HOW CAN YOU TURN A PERFECTLY GOOD SHOW THAT RULED THE 80S AND EARLY 90S INTO A CROCK OF BULLSHIT! AND HOW CAN YOU CHANGE MY NAME TO THIS! YOU COULD HAVE AT LEAST CALLED ME RYUZAKI RAPTOR OR SOMETHING! BITCHES! I HOPE YOU ALL GO BANKRUPT THEN ROT IN HELL! OK, im done.

**Jeff: **RIGHT ON! And with that said, Let the voting begin. Seto, if you please?

_Kaiba walks up to the box and scribbles a name down._

**Kaiba: **Odion, your big, intimidating ass has GOT to go!

_Kaiba returns as Rex walks up to the vote box._

**Rex: **Mokuba, you little shit! You wanna ruin my chance to get laid! FUCK YOU!

_Rex returns as Marik goes up, then Mokuba, then Odion. Jeff takes the votes and tallies them._

**Jeff: **Ok, lets see here… we have one vote for Odion… one for "Mokuba's bitch ass", one for Odion, another for Odion, and the final… for Odion! Alright Odion, bring me your torch.

_Odion hands Jeff his torch, who douses it and turns back to him._

**Jeff: **Odion, your Tribe has spoken. You have been voted off. We thank you for staying this long. Take care, buddy! As for the rest of you, You may go back to camp.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Odion: **Hell yeah I voted myself off. If I have to spend ONE more day babysitting that little bastard Mokuba, ill go crazy. And besides, ill be DAMNED if I ever sing again! Now, I'm taking the first boat off this god-forsaken Island! PEACE!

**Were at the halfway point as another duelist is voted off Destiny Island. Pootietang Tribe is up by one, but as we all know, tomorrow is another day! What other kind of crazy challenge or adventure lies in store for our duelists? Find out next time on:**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast**

**Duelist Style!**

**Ok everybody! I hope you enjoyed the performance! Please R&R. I know you guys are gonna be harsh about the New Kids on the Block thing, but you KNOW it was funny! Lets thank Sakurachan209 for giving me the lyrics to "The Right Stuff"!**


	7. The Horror of the Nurse

Hi Everybody! Im SO sorry this took so long to upload. I was on Spring Break for the past 2 weeks… yeah, 2… so I was on a road trip. I know you don't care, but I went to Great America, Six Flags Magic Mountain, Disneyland, Disney's California Adventure (ooohhh that sucked so much ass!) and Knotts Berry Farm. But im back now, so im gonna make it up to you. So in the meantime, heres Chappie 7!

By the way, I just learned that im not susposed to have scripts on here, so I have to do it this way. If my story gets kicked off, don't worry… IT WILL BE BACK!

**DISCLAIMER: ** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do I own Survivor.

Seto Kaiba woke up on a beautiful Saturday morning. He got out of bed and did his normal morning routine… took a shower, brushed his teeth, listened to the stocks on the radio, got dressed, and beat the utter shit out of the Yugi mannequin that he had personally made. Kaiba was still tired, however. The performance from the night before really took it out of the young CEO.

"Coffee… need some motherfuckin' coffee…" Kaiba muttered to himself.

He stumbled down the stares only to find Rex Raptor and Marik Ishtar slouched down on the couch playing Marvel vs. Capcom 2 on Playstation 2. They looked like a couple of zombies. Mokuba was sitting at the table in the kitchen eating a bowl of Frosted Flakes. Kaiba walked into the kitchen and looked around as it was still clean from the day before.

"What the hell? Where the hell is breakfast! And why the fuck isn't there any coffee made!" Kaiba called out from the kitchen.

"Um, we voted Odion off last night, remember!" Marik shot back.

"No shit Sherlock!" Kaiba yelled back. "What the hell does he have to do with my question!"

"Odion was the one who made breakfast all this time, you moron!" Rex shouted.

"… You know what? I knew that." Kaiba said. He looked inside the cupboard and pulled out a box of Honey Nut Cheerios and poured some into a bowl, followed by the milk he took off Mokuba's table. He then walked into the living room and plopped down on the recliner and watched Rex and Marik play their game while he had his cereal.

"Who's using Strider, Ryu, and Spider Man?" Kaiba asked.

"I am." Marik said.

"You fuckin suck."

"Fuck you! Why don't you hop in and beat this asshole!"

"I will."

Kaiba put his bowl down and snatched the controller away from Marik as he suddenly made a comeback, beating all three of Rex's fighters with only one guy left and a sliver of health.

"WHAT THE FUCK? YOU CHEATER! HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" Rex shouted.

"Because I am the fuckin' master. That's how." Kaiba said as he tossed the controller back to Marik.

"No no, you're the ass master, theres a difference." Marik said.

"Master my ass. Is that why Kaiba ALWAYS gets one-uped by Yugi?" Rex shot back. WRONG THING TO SAY TO KAIBA AS HE IS JUST WAKING UP! The minute Rex finished his sentence, a ceramic bowl shattered against his skull, instantly knocking him out, his clothes covered in Honey Nut Cheerios and milk. Kaiba got up and stormed out of the room.

"Tell that bastard to clean that shit up with he comes to!" Kaiba shouted as he left the room. Marik and Mokuba watched Kaiba as he left the room, then looked back at the unconscience Rex Raptor hunched over the couch.

"DAMN!" They both said in unison.

_**16 Duelists have gathered on the tropical deserted island known as Destiny Island, and as the days marched on, a number of them have already been voted off of the island. So who is next to go? Find out today on:**_

**_Survivor : Outwit, Outplay, Outlast_**

**_Duelist Style!_**

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 9:10am**

Yugi woke up on a beautiful Saturday morning and stretched out, did his morning exercise, then grabbed a towel and and walked outside to the out house that was just recently built.

"No surprise…" Yugi said as he saw a line formed in front of it. Mako had already occupied the tiny restroom. Mai stood there, tapping her foot off the sand, followed by Joey, then Tristan. Yugi walked behind Tristan, trying to keep the sun out of his huge, purple eyes.

"We REALLY need another out house." Yugi said to Tristan. "Serious! My teeth still have that morning muck on them! I gotta freakin brush!" Tristan said angrily.

Mai pounded on the door to the out-house. "MAKO! WOULD YOU COME THE FUCK OUT OF THERE! SERIOUSLY, THE ONLY THING YOU EVER WEAR ARE A PAIR OF FADED BLUE JEANS! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN THERE THAT'S TAKING FUCKIN 2 HOURS?" Everyone heard a voice sing from the out-house:

"_Sixteen men on a dead man's chest! Yo ho ho and a bottle of - -"_

Suddenly there was a Bronx sound, followed by a smell that seeped underneath the door and inside the nostrils of the Pootietang Tribe. Each one turned green in the face.

"DAMN!" Mai shouted as she took off running. Joey and Tristan bolted off in a different direction.

"Fuck that! If I wanna get a shower, im doing it in the lake!" Joey shouted behind him.

"It's the ocean for me!" Tristan said back

Yugi ran back inside his hut, took out an oxygen mask, then turned it on, covered his mouth, then he started to inhale.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Yugi Muto : Pootietang Tribe Leader**

"Geez Laweez! I have NO idea what Mako's been eating, but I've never seen anyone clear an area like that since the time Joey ate one of the school's been burritos!"

Yugi took off the oxygen mask and held his Millennium Puzzle, starting to concentrate.

"Man, if I wanna get clean, ill have to go to my secret room."

With a gold flash, Yugi was gone, and only the Millennium Puzzle sat on the floor of the hut.

**(The cameras have no idea where Yugi is, but we are gonna go ahead anyways and find out.)**

Inside the Millennium Puzzle rested two rooms. One room was a happy room that was filled with toys, dolls, games… everything that represented a happy child. The second room however, was a bit different. It was dark and mysterious. No one knew what was behind that door. Further down the hall rested another room. Yugi made his way through the darkness and finally reached the door. However, something was wrong.

"The door… why is the door locked!" Yugi said out of frusteration. Yugi took out his Sangan card and slid it through the crack in the door, then started jiggling the handle til it finally opened. Inside the room was a beautifully crafted bathroom, complete with a sink, toilet, roman tub with a shower, and a towel rack. Yami Yugi, inside the room, suddenly shot around.

"What the… Yugi?"

"OH MY GOD!" Yugi yelled as he covered his eyes. His alter-ego was standing there NAKED!

"What are you doing in MY PERSONAL BATHROOM!" Yugi shouted as he covered his eyes.

"Oh, YOU made this? I thought this was one of my lost memories. And what are you covering your eyes for? This is nothing you haven't seen in the shower!"

"Man whatever…"

It was then where Yugi realized what his partner was doing.

"ARE THOSE MY SCISSORS?" Yugi yelled out furiously. Yami shrugged. "I don't know. I found them in one of these drawers like a couple months ago. Think you can leave for like ten more minutes while I finish trimming my pubic hairs?"

Yugi's face got bright red from anger. "PHARAOH! I FUCKIN TRIM MY NOSE HAIRS WITH THOSE!"

Yami looked over his shoulder at his uber-pissed hikari. "Yugi, I've been trimming my ball hairs with these scissors for like two months now…"

Yugi was about to snap, but he suddenly gained his composure. "PHARAOH… GET… THE FUCK… OUT… OF MY BATHROOM… RIGHT FUCKIN NOW…!"

"Hang on."

Yami continued to trim his "danger zone". "DAMMIT! NOW I SEE WHY KAIBA WANTS YOUR ASS DEAD! I EVEN SEE WHY YOUR ASS WAS STUFFED IN THIS PUZZLE IN THE FIRST PLACE! YOU FUCKIN ANNOY THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE IN YOUR PATH!" Yugi yelled out of frusteration.

Yami put the scissors back, then turned around and started to walk out of the room.

"Shut the fuck up. You know you like it!" Yami laughed as he walked past Yugi. He then ducked his head as he kept walking as an empty can of shaving cream flew past where he head should have been, followed by the slamming of a door.

**(Back to Survivor: Duelist Style)**

Joey and Tristan sat at one of the picnic tables in their tribal area, trying to get their black and white tv working.

"So did you hear?" Tristan said breaking the silence.

"Hear what?" Joey answered.

"I overheard Jeff talking to some of the camera crew. Apparently there's gonna be a nurse on this island! And I also hear she's hot!"

"Are you shittin' me?"

"Nope! And if Jeff said it, it MUST be true!"

_Ill show that nurse what a REAL man is! Get ready, lady! Joey Wheeler's about to show you a good time! _Joey thought to himself. "Hey man, I just remembered something. Yuge asked me to help him with… uh… his newest dueling strategy! Yeah! A Duelist's job is never done… see ya later! And good luck with this piece of shit tv!" Joey started to slowly back away from the picnic table, then took off running into the bushes.

_THOUGHT HE WOULD NEVER LEAVE!_ Tristan thought. He quickly ran into his hut and came out a few mniutes later in a sharp, black tuxedo. He was holding a heart shaped box of chocolates in one hand and a dozen packed roses in the other. "Every girl's crazy bout a sharped dressed man!" Tristan said as he started walking toward the CBS Campsite.

**Location : CBS Campsite : 1:27pm**

Rex Raptor finally regained conscienceness from having a ceramic bowl shattering off his head, curtisy of Seto Kaiba.

"OH NO! IM BLIND! IM FUCKIN BLIND! IM VISUALLY CHALLENGED!" Rex yelled in a panic. A soft, most hand was felt on Rex's, followed by a beautiful voice. "Calm down, Rex… your not blind. I just had to wrap half your head up. You had a nasty bump there."

The sound of the voice not only calmed Rex down, but filled his body with a familiar passion to get laid.

"Are you the one who took care of me?" Rex asked in a polite voice.

"Yes I am. I'm the new nurse that was assigned to the show."

"Thank you so much… I'm Rex Raptor, the dino duelist!"

The nurse laughed. "Hee hee hee! I know who you are! I know all about you." A huge grin shot across Rex's face. "You do!" he asked excitedly. "Uh huh! I guess you can say, I'm a HUGE fan of yours!"

"_OK… calm down, Rex… Just… calm… down… This one is SOO OURS" _Rex thought to himself.

"How did you get that bump anyways? Did someone push you down some stairs?" The nurse asked. "No! Bastard face Kaiba threw a glass bowl at me!"

"OH MY GOODNESS!"

"Yeah, tell me about it! He's one of just many of the annoying people out there that holds me back! And have you even met that brother of his? He's a fuckin' Satan spawn!"

The nurse took Rex's hands again. "You must calm down, Mr. Raptor. Your head hasn't fully healed yet. You'll give yourself a headache."

Suddenly, Rex felt something different. He didn't want to just get into this one's pants. This one actually cared about him. "Wow… no one's ever took care of me like this before… your so good to me…" Rex said. "Awwwwww… not even your parents?"

"No… I'm.. adopted…"

"Awwww, poor Rex."

"But you… you must make your husband very happy."

"I don't have a husband, hon."

"Really? Well your boyfriend then?"

"No boyfriend either."

This was it! This was Rex's time! He stood up in his chair, then fiddled around til he found the nurse's hands and held them.

"You need someone to take care of you… just like you did me! And I'll be that man! Once I win this stupid reality show, I'll take you to Hawaii… no, ill take you to the Galapagos Islands! Better yet, I'll by you a house on the beach!"

"OOOOOHHHH REXY!"

"Yeah baby! Not many men can bring the Travel Channel to life! One day you and I will be on an Amazon Adventure, and the next we'll be on a Luxurious cruise to the Bermuda Triangle! You and I were meant to be! That bowl colliding with my head was the final sign to bring us together!"

"OH REX! I WANTED YOU EVER SINCE I SAW YOU ON THE FIRST EPISODE!" the nurse said. Surprisingly, she was REALLY EXCITED!

"Nothing can go wrong… this feeling is too strong!" Rex said epicly

"I FEEL THE SAME WAY!" The nurse said.

"Honey… I don't even know your name."

"Hee Hee… I guess I got so excited, I forgot to tell you my name!" the nurse laughed, embarrassed. "Its Bernadette!"

"Bernadette… its like the name of an angel!"

Bernadette laughed as she continued to hold Rex's hand. "Bernadette… baby… please, take off my bandages… let me see the face of my future wife!" Rex said happily.

"OK!"

Rex felt the bandages being taken off **_(Random Author Thought: Is anyone else having Serenity flashbacks? _**followed by the wiping of a damp rag gently over the bump on his forehead. It was followed up with a headband being gently tired around his head. The whole time, Rex had his eyes closed.

"I bet your SO sexy!" Rex said excitedly.

"Well… people have told me I looked like Christina Aguilera and LeAnn Rimes."

"OK, I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! IM OPENING MY EYES!"

Rex's plan was to open his eyes and take the nurse into his hands... but that didn't happen. As soon as Rex's eyes shot open, sirens blared in his head. His skin turned pale and his mouth widened. A high pitch scream could be heard from the nurse's office. Rex leaped over his chair and took shelter against a wall.

"WHO… OR WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SUSPOSED TO BE? WHERE THE FUCK IS BERNADETTE!" Rex shouted.

"I am Bernadette, baby! Now come here and give me some lovin'!" Bernadette ran and tried to grab Rex, but Rex ducked out of the way and ran to the other side of the room.

"BITCH, YOUR NOT BERNADETTE! YOU DON'T FUCKIN LOOK ANYTHING LIKE CHRISTINA AGUILERA OR LEANN RIMES! YOU'RE A DAMN BEACHED WHALE!"

Bernadette was, in fact, a heavy set woman with acne riddled all over her face and blonde hair that went down to her shoulders. She wore a nurses outfit and those little nurse hats… you know the ones I'm talking about.

"Come on Rexy Honey! Your gonna take me on an amazon adventure, remember? I think I know EXACTLY the kind of adventure YOU want!" Bernadette said seductively.

"BITCH, YOU ARE AN AMAZON!" Rex yelled in a panic. "_I gotta get out of here, I gotta get out of here!" _

Poor Rex was now on pins and needles… he's heart stopped from terror. He felt like a little kid looking face to face with the Boogeyman. There was no where to run. The door was locked and Rex was trapped in the office. Tears of fear and frusteration ran down his cheeks. "_Why do these things ONLY happen to me?" _Rex thought. It was then that he saw it. He saw his one escape route!

"_SCORE!" _

But in order to take it, this would have to be done with PRECISE timing. Bernadette zeroed in on Rex. "Come on baby! Give me some sugar!" she shouted as she charged toward her "Rexy". THIS WAS IT! The moment she got close enough, Rex ran at her and executed a baseball slide between her legs, making damn sure he covered his eyes and not look up her skirt (god only knows what he would have seen up there), then got up as fast as he could, ran across the office then dove clear THROUGH the window, shattering it into a million pieces. Rex used a defensive roll once he hit the ground, then ran as fast as he could, disappearing into the Jungle area.

Bernadette looked through the broken window as Rex vanished through the brush.

"He'll be back."

**Outside the office…**

Joey stood outside the office covered in bandages and fake blood. Clearly, his idea was to sweep the nurse off her feet. "_Awwww yeah! This is my best idea yet! It'll be just like those movies on Cinemax after 11pm!" _He thought. Suddenly a voice blared behind him, startling him.

"WHEELER! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE!"

Joey whipped around to find a sharp dressed Tristan looking angrily at him. "ME! Who the hell are you susposed to be! A penguin?"

"For your information you butt pirate, I'm here to talk to the nurse!"

"Bitch, IM the one who's gonna see the nurse! NOT YOU!"

Tristan threw down his chocolate and flowers. "The only thing your Beatle lookin ass is gonna see is STARS, once I bust your ass in the mouth!"

Joey started to take the bandages off of his fists. "Keep talking you needle-headed son of a fuck. JUST KEEP TALKIN, SO I CAN WHOOP YOUR ASS JUST LIKE I DID JUST LIKE I DID WHEN I SLAPPED THAT FUNKY ASS TOOTHBRUSH INTO THAT PISS WATER!"

Tristan took off his suit coat, staring Joey down all the while. "You asshole… you did NOT just bring the Oral-B into this… Shit just hit the fan now…"

Joey took off all of his bandages. "You damn right it did."

There was silence as the gentle breeze blew through. Joey and Tristan stared each other down. A lowly branch blew with the wind, finally snapping it off the tree. The branch landed in the sand, making a soft thump. With that, Joey and Tristan charged and grappled each other! Knowing they were both equally matched, Tristan kicked Joey in the one place you NEVER kick a guy (I don't care what the situation is). Joey went down with a high pitched screech. Tristan got over him and start delivering a flurry of punches. Joey threw his left arm up to block most of the hits, but was still taking a majority of the blows.

"BITCH! **(POW!)** YOU…**(POW!) **WANNA **(POW!) **FIGHT…**(POW!) **DIRTY?" Joey yelled through the onslaught.

Tristan continued to whale on his best friend. "KICK MY ASS, HUH WHEELER! KICK MY ASS? LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE THE ONE GETTIN' BEAT LIKE A RED NECK'S WIFE!" Suddenly, Joey lunged his right arm forward, throwing a fist-full of sand into Tristan's eyes! "AAAAAHHHHH! MOTHER FUCKER!" Tristan said as he felt himself getting bucked off of Joey. Soon they were both off the ground, but Tristan was swinging blindly, trying to find Joey.

"WHERE ARE YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT? WHERE ARE YOU!"

Joey took the opportunity to mess with Tristan while he was temporarily impaired. He ran behind him and started kicking him in the ass.

"Over here! Or am I over here! Oooohhh almost had me! Wrong way, bitch!" Joey laughed. Tristan opened his eyes a little to see Joey's schillouette. He ran directly at him, tackling him on the ground. The next minute, they were both on the ground in a gruesome slug fest. The door opened and someone was standing there watching them.

"OOHHH, ARE YOU TWO FIGHTING OVER ME!"

The sound of the voice made them both instantly stop fighting. They both quickly got off the ground, and at the same time, said, "I CAME TO SEE YOU!" Joey's mouth dropped as he saw Bernadette standing there. Tristan, still blind from the sand, couldn't see the horror that stood in front of him. "Dude, is that the nurse? Is she hot!"

Just then, Joey a very devilish smile shot across Joey's face. "Dude, she's fuckin hot as shit! I'm talkin' Sandra Bullock hot!"

"SHE'S MINE!"

"DAMN STRAIGHT SHE'S YOUR'S!"

Joey shoved Tristan into the waiting arms of Bernadette, then took off running as if he were being chased. As he ran, he closed his eyes and smiled.

"_Hahahaha! Looks like ol' Joey Wheeler gets the last laugh! Hahahahaha!"_

Joey, eyes being closed, ran DIRECTLY into a tree, landing on his back. His eyes had the anime spiral as his mouth hung open. (you know how when Joey is always all wide mouthed).

**Location: Pootietang Tribe : 3:18pm**

Yugi had on a gas mask as he desperately sprayed air freshener into the out-house. He right hand still a little shaky, he pulled the mask down and took a whiff. It was gone. The smell was FINALLY gone!

"Took long enough! 4 cans of air freshener FINALLY got that damn smell out. I swear, Mako is a stinky bitch!" He said.

Yami's transparent figure appeared next to him. "Yes. I think he's been hittin the oysters and beer or something."

Yugi turned away from the Pharaoh. "I am NOT speaking to you!" Yami had a huge smile on his face. "Come on, Yugi… this isn't about those scissors still, is it?"

"YES IT IS! I CANT BELIEVE YOU'VE BEEN TRIMMING YOUR PUBS WITH SOMETHING I USE ON MY FUCKIN NOSE! I WAS WONDERING WHY IVE HAD THE SCENT OF FUNK IN MY NOSE! I THOUGHT EVERYONE I CAME NEAR DIDN'T FUCKIN SHOWER OR SOMETHING!"

"Hold on… I'm sensing something…"

"NO! DON'T YOU TRY THAT SERIOUS BULLSHIT WITH ME, PHARAOH!"

"No, Yugi, seriously!" Yami had his game face on. "I sense danger!"

"YOU KNOW WHAT! YOU'VE ALWAYS GOTTA STEAL THE SPOT LIGHT TOO! FIRST WITH THE WHOLE ORICHALCOS THING, NOW THIS SHOW?"

Yami suddenly took over Yugi's body as he ran and dove out of the way, just in the neck of time. The out-house suddenly exploded!

Yugi and Yami both looked at each other.

"KAIBA!" they said in unison.

Yami shook his head. "He ought be ashamed of himself… that was the GAYEST attempt EVER to try and kill me.

Suddenly, Tristan walked up to them. He looked VERY pissed off… sweaty too. "WHERE…IS… JOEY…?" He said as calm as he could.

Yami Yugi shrugged. "Haven't seen his ass all day."

"Well if you do… tell him IM lookin for him!" Tristan said as he walked off. Yugi watched as Tristan stormed off into the woods, then looked at his alter ego. "Did Tristan look a bit… warped to you?"

Yami crossed his arms as he watched Tristan disappear into the woods. "Yeah… like he had sex with a fat chick…"

Tristan walked with a purpose. He was determined to find Joey. "That son of a bitch will PAY! I cant believe I lost my virginity to … THAT FUCKIN WALRUS!" Tristan suddenly stopped in his tracks. "What the hell are you doing out here?"

"I know your pissed off about that fat ass nurse… if you help me get Kaiba back, I'll help you get Wheeler back! I've had a bone to pick with his ass since day one!"

Tristan, anger still controlling his body, agreed. "I cant stand your guts, but I want some fuckin retribution right now! So lets do it… Rex!"

Tristan and Rex shook hands… **DUN DUN DUN!**

**Immunity Challenge!**

**Location : Top of Mt. Four Winds : 5:15pm**

Jeff stood at the top of a large mountain overlooking Destiny Island, wearing mountain climbing gear. He stopped yodeling long enough to address the cameras.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we are standing at the top of Mt. Four Winds… one of the many wonders of Destiny Island. This mountain got it's name, because… well… the name says it all. Four different winds blow around it, forcing on the bravest of adventures to scale it! Which brings us to today's Immunity Challenge! At the bottom of the mountain are our survivors! When they get the signal, they'll have to scale to the top of Mt. Four Winds, using teamwork to protect themselves against the four different directions of the winds. The first team to reach the top wins the immunity!"

Jeff turned to the production team. "Fire the flare in 3 minutes. They should be ready by then."

**Bottom of the Mountain…**

Everyone was dressed in Mountain climbing gear. Each tribe was opposite sides of the mountain, for fear that they will fight while climbing the mountain. Everyone had a bungee cord connected to one another to make the challenge more interesting. If one person fell, the whole team goes too.

The Pootietang Tribe were ready. Yami Yugi took over as the host, connected to Joey, then Mai, then Mako, then Tristan. Yami turned to the team.

"You ready to do this shit!"

Joey sat with his legs crossed on the ground. "No… I hate heights!" Mai turned to him. "Joey, get your bitch ass up! If we lost this, Kaiba said he was going to put a giant picture of you in that dog suit that Duke Devlin made you wear!" Joey sprung to his feet. "THAT SON OF A RAT BASTARD! ILL KILL HIM!" Tristan, still a bit sore at Joey, stared a hole right through him. "Not as badly as I'm gonna kill YOUR ass!"

On the other side of the mountain, the Gazonga Tribe were all set to climb the mountain. Dressed in special mountain climbing gear (curtisy of Kaiba Corporation), Seto Kaiba looked up at the mountain and shook his head.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Seto Kaiba: Gazonga Tribe leader**

The cameras suddenly shift to Kaiba, who was doing his camera time earlier today:

"Ok, seriously. I'm a DUELIST! Not a fuckin' mountain climber! I mean seriously, is this Cliffhanger or something! Do I look fuckin' like Sylvester Stallone to you? These past Immunity challenges have been nothing but a continuous chain of bullshit! But… it DOES have it's bright sides. For this challenge is the next step in killing Yugi's bitch ass! If you thought the exploding out-house was it, you ought be ashamed of yourself!"

The scene shifts back to the Gazonga Tribe as they got ready to scale the mountain. Kaiba was connected to Mokuba, then Rex, then Marik. Mokuba walked up to his big brother and looked at him with excitement. "So tell me Seto… how are you gonna kill Yugi today!" Kaiba continued to look up at the mountain. "Oh believe me Mokuba… its already taken care of."

After Kaiba spoke, a giant flare went off into the sky. As It exploded, the word "GO" could be seen in the sky. The camera switched to a side split screen as both tribes jumped up and climbed the mountain with all that the were worth. The higher the teams go, the harder the climb would be. Excessive cussing came from both sides as they struggled to climb Mt. Four Winds. The Duelists soon learned why it was called that, because the winds from two different sides started to blow like a giant fan was literally trying to knock them off the mountain.

The Gazonga Tribe held on the the mountain for all that they were worth, trying to avoid being blown off. Kaiba tightly closed his eyes as winds from four different directions hit him and his team.

"IM NOT PAID ENOUGH FOR THIS SHIT!" He shouted.

The Pootietang tribe had a firm grip on the mountain as the winds kicked up. Yugi bravely tried to climb the mountain, taking the winds head on, but suddenly stopped.

"WHAT… THE… FUCK?"

He looked down to see Joey holding the mountain tight as if his life depended on it.

"I WANT MY MOMMY! I WANT MY MOMMY! I WANT MY MOMMY!" He cried.

"JOEY! YOU HAVE GOT TO FACE YOUR FEARS!" Yugi yelled to try to encourage his best friend.

"ILL SNAP THE BITCH OUT OF IT!" Tristan yelled as he climbed past Mai and Mako. Tristan lifted his hand to try and hit Joey, but a powerful gust hit Tristan's back dead on, sending him flying towards a trail in the mountain! Yugi and the others plummeted after him, with Joey screaming like a girl all the while. They all landed on top of one another, surprised that they survived their free fall.

"Tristan, you jackass! What the hell were you thinking?" Mai shouted.

"Needless to say… were gonna lose." Mako said.

"ME! YOURE BLAMING ME FOR THIS? IF THIS LITTLE PUSSY RIGHT HERE WASN'T SUCH A SCARY BITCH, WE WOULDN'T HAVE FALLEN IN THE FIRST PLACE!" Tristan shouted in his defense.

"HEY KOALA FUCKER! DON'T GET MAD AT ME JUST CUZ YOU GOT RAPED BY A FAT BITCH!" Joey shouted back at Tristan.

"That's it you asshole!"

Joey and Tristan were on the ground fighting again. Yami Yugi ran over and started stomping the both of them. "KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF RIGHT NOW! KAIBA'S STUPID ASS TEAM IS GONNA …." Suddenly, there was a loud growling sound. The sound was scary enough to make Joey and Tristan stop fighting.

"Um… What the piss what that!" Mai said in a monotone voice.

"if I didn't know better… I'd say that was…" Mako began. Before he can finish, a giant, brown, hairy beast busted out from the side of the mountain, growling the whole time.

"AAAAAHHHHH! ITS FUCKIN BIGFOOT!" Joey shouted.

"Hey stupid ass… it's a well known fact that Bigfoot lives in the forest. Not a damn mountain." Tristan said. Joey turned to him. "You know what… I knew that."

Suddenly, in unison, the Pootietang Tribe shouted, "IT'S A YETI!" And with that, they all took off running, with the Yeti in hot pursuit. The chase didn't last long as Tristan tripped over a rock, sending him falling to the ground. Of course, the teams were still tethered together, sending each member to the ground like a bunch of dominoes. They each turned to see the Yeti starring them in the eyes.

"This is it… were all gonna die! And I thought I would be eaten by a whale!" Mako shouted.

"I WANNA GO HOME! I WANNA GO HOME!" Joey cried out.

"OH HELL NAW! I'm not goin out like that!" Yami Yugi shouted. He put on and activated his Duel Disk. "I summon Catapult Turtle in attack mode! Then I summon Kuriboh! Now my furry beast! Mount the turtle!"

"Hahahahahahaha! Mount!" Mako laughed.

Yami Yugi continued. "Now my turtle! FIRE!" The Catapult Turtle fired the little fuzzy creature directly at the Yeti. It was then that Yugi activated another card. "Now I activate Multiply! Which turns one Kuriboh into one hundred!" The one Kuriboh began to multiply, with each one of them exploding off the Yeti on contact.

"YES! I forgot that Kuriboh explode on contact!" Mai said happily.

"OK OK! STOP!"

Shocked faces appeared on each member of the Pootietang Tribe's faces.

"DID… DID THAT THING JUST FUCKIN TALK!" Tristan shouted.

"YES! OUCH! YES I DID! OWWW! And im not a 'thing'". The Yeti tried to shake off all the debris from all the Kuriboh attacks. "Hi, Percival T. Sullivan… I am a Yeti, and I was NOT told that you would fight back!"

Blank expressions were shown on the faces of Yugi, Joey, Tristan, Mai, and Mako.

"I was genetically engineered a long time ago by the Kaiba Corporation back in the days when Gozaburo Kaiba was the President. Since then I was living a carefree life in the woods until Seto Kaiba one day came to me and told me that if I killed Yugi, then he would give me my own TV show! But you see, I'm a peaceful creature… I hate to fight. And Kaiba certainly didn't say that you would fight back!" The Yeti explained.

"I am going to kick Kaiba's ass for this." Yugi declared.

"Speaking of Kaiba, he's probably like halfway to the top!" Mai shouted.

"No need to worry! If you like, I can take you to the top of this mountain!" Percival offered.

"Sure! Lets fuckin go!" Yugi shouted.

And so, the Yeti lead them all the way to the top, but it was too late. Back at the other side of Mt. Four Winds, Kaiba and his team reached the top of the mountain! They all sat down in front of the cameras, panting and wheezing. Jeff ran up to congratulate them.

"And the winner of the Immunity challenge… THE GAZONGA TRIBE!" He announced. Kaiba grabbed his shirt and pulled him close.

"If you… EVER… make us do some bullshit like that again… ill slit your fuckin throat! YOU HEAR ME?"

"Um… yeah…"

Suddenly, from behind Jeff, came none other than Bernadette! "Rexy-pie! Come here! Let me give you some victory sex!" She said. Rex's eyes widened at the sight of her.

"OH THE DAMN YOU WILL!"

Rex suddenly stood up and bolted, with Kaiba, Mokuba, and Marik dangling behind him. Of course, they were still connected to each other.

"Raptor… stop it! Fuckin quit running!" Kaiba yelled as he was being dragged along the way. Rex however, forgetting that they were just inches from the edge of the mountain, ran off the side! The cameras zoomed out to get the whole shot of Mt. Four Winds as four little dots were seen bouncing off each level of the mountain! Finally, they hit the bottom level, each laid out in a diamond pattern.

"Rex… if my… foot… isn't broken… remind me… to break it off… IN… YOUR… ASS!" Kaiba struggled to say.

The cameras switched back to the top of the mountain as the Pootietang Tribe arrived at the top.

"AWRIGHT! WE WON!" Joey shouted. Jeff turned to them. "Actually, the Gazonga Tribe won… considering they aren't dead.

"FUCK!" Yugi yelled out

"Im sorry guys… I got you hear too late." Percival said. "Don't worry Percy. Its not your fault. This was Tristan's stupid ass' fault." Mai said.

"You know what, Britney?" Tristan shouted.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME!" Mai said, with her face burning red. Suddenly, Bernadette appeared behind Tristan.

"Hiiiii Tristan!" She said in a sing-songy voice. A cold chill shot down Tristan's back as he turned to look her right in the face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Tristan took off running down the mountain trial, with the Pootietang Tribe behind him the whole time being dragged on the ground, shouting and cussing the whole time. Not too far behind, Bernadette tried her best to keep up with them.

"Wait for my, my little Tristan!"

Jeff stood watching the scene, with the classic anime sweat drop at the back of his head. He finally turned to the cameras.

"We'll see you at the Tribal Council…"

**Location : Tribal Council : 10: 35pm**

At the Tribal Council, The Pootietang tribe stood facing Jeff, each member battered from their wild ride down the mountain, curtisy of Tristan. Tristan however, was unscathed.

Jeff addressed the Pootietang Tribe. "Ok, you all know the drill… Mai, how do you feel about losing the Immunity Challenge?"

"I feel like fuckin breaking someone's neck!" Mai said, staring at Tristan.

"And Tristan, how do you feel about losing the challenge." Jeff asked.

"I could give 3 drops of monkey piss about the challenge! Just keep that fat ugly bitch of a nurse away from me!" Tristan yelled.

"Ok, its voting time. Start us off Yugi." Jeff said.

Yugi walked up to the voting box, wrote down a name, and dropped it inside. "Tristan… ive got a giant ass hole in my damn mountain climbing pants! Your ass is gone!"

Yugi walked back, followed by Joey. "Tristan… I love you as a brother… but if I so much as look at you again, ill sock you in your damn jaw."

And so, all the votes were in as Jeff walked over and tallied them all. "One vote for Tristan… another vote for Tristan… one vote for Yugi…"

"WHAT THE HELL! WHAT THE FUCK?" Yugi shouted.

"One for Tristan, and one for Joey… ok Tristan, bring me your torch." Jeff said. Tristan brought over his torch as Jeff doused it and threw it over his shoulders. "Tristan, the tribe has spoken. You are now eliminated. We thank you for all your efforts."

Tristan turned and walked away, then turned back to the others. "Later…" No one said anything back, but they just waved at him.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Tristan Taylor**

"Hey, I'm glad I'm gone! No more sand in my ass… no more stupid ass Joey… and best of all… NO MORE OF THAT FAT ASS BERNADETTE! YEE HAW!"

Tristan could then be seen running to the boat that heads back to Domino. However, there was someone else on the boat with him.

"Hey baby! Have you ever had sex on a boat before!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Tristan yelled as Bernadette pulled him into the cabin in the boat.

And so, the Moon overlooks Destiny Island as another day comes to a close… with another duelist on his way home… in a VERY disturbing way. The cameras suddenly zoom in on Joey.

"Tristan never was a fuckin duelist… neither is Mokuba! So why the FUCK were they even here to begin with! SORRY ASS WRITING! I SWEAR!"

**Tomorrow's another day as there are only 8 duelists left on Destiny Island. Who's gonna win the 3 Million Dollars and the Treasure Chest full of cards rarer than the Egyptian God Cards? Find out next time on Survivor! Duelist Style! Now if you don't mind me, I have to go break my foot off in the ass of a certain blonde hair, smart ass duelist!**

**OK guys, I know it was a bit long, but hopefully it makes up for my being away for so long. Please R&R! Next chapter will NOT … I repeat… NOT be list long to get up. You have my promise!**


	8. Merger of the Tribes

**DISCLAIMER: ** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do I own Survivor.

Its another beautiful day on the tropical Destiny Island as the sun glares over the campsite of the Pootietang Tribe. A man dressed up in a mailman uniform walked up to a large basket in the middle of the campsite and dropped off two letters, along with a package. He then started to ring a bell that was located next to the mail basket.

**DING! DING! DING!**

"MAIL CALL!"

The man hopped on a motor scooter and drove away. Yugi, Joey, Mai, and Mako scrambled out of their huts towards the mail basket.

"Finally! After like 7 episodes, we FINALLY got some mail!" Joey said excitedly.

"WHAT'D WE GET? WHAT'D WE GET! WHAT'D WE GET!" Mako said, wide eyed. Each of them looked as shaky as a patient in a mental institute… shaken with excitement. Yugi reached into the basket and pulled out the two letters and the package.

"Hey, this is a fancy looking box!" Yugi said, looking the box up and down. "Who's it for? And more importantly, what's in it?" Joey asked. "I don't know… but theres something pretty heavy inside."

"Something heavy? Maybe my loving fans sent me all the accessories that I need to survive on this hell hole of an island!" Mai said.

"Forget that shit! Its probably 12 cases of FRUIT PUNCH!" Mako said teary-eyed. Mai scrunched her face as she gave Mako an irritated look. "Get real, Fish boy!"

"Whatever it is, its for Joey…" Yugi said as he read the card on the package. Suddenly, the package was snatched out of little Yugi's hands.

"GIMME THAT!" Joey shouted excitedly. "CHA-CHING! THE PRODUCERS WERE PROBABLY LIKE, 'JOEY IS SOOO COOL! LETS JUST GO ON AND GIVE HIM THE CARDS!' OR MAYBE ITS JUST FROM SOME HOT FAN GIRL! OOOOHHH COME TO PAPA!" Joey said happily as he tore the package open. He opened the box and pulled out with looked to be a clock with a bunch of wires sticking out of it.

"Eh? Who sent me a clock? I wanted cards! Or food… one of the two!" Joey said, looking the "clock" up and down. Yugi, Mai, and Mako were wide-eyed, sweating bullets.

"J-J-J-JOEY! THAT'S A…" Yugi muttered. Joey turned and looked at him. "A what, Yuge?" Mai and Mako took off running.

"A TIMEBOMB!" Mako yelled behind him.

"A WHAT!"

**RIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! KA-BOOOOOOOOOOM!**

Joey stood there, charred black, still with his arms held out from where the bomb used to be. Joey coughed up smoke as Yugi, Mako, and Mai poked their heads out from behind a picnic table.

"Uh… Joey… you ok?" Mako said.

"WHO THE FUCK SENT THIS SHIT TO ME! IT WAS THAT DUCK FUCKER, KAIBA, WASN'T IT?" Joey yelled out.

The three duelist walked back towards Joey as Mai noticed a scrap of paper that had dropped out of the box the bomb was in.

"Hey! Maybe this has an answer!" She picked up the letter and read it out loud:

_Payback's a bitch, aint it, Wheeler! I'll see your ass when you get back to Domino! Good luck on Survivor! Luv, Tristan_

The charred Joey took the letter from Mai and re-read it, then closed his eyes, smiled, and crumpled the paper up.

"OOoooohhh… when I get back to Domino… there's gonna be a MURDER!"

**You've seen him as "The King of Games", and now, he's "The King of Prime Time"! He's Yugi Muto! Along with 7 other Duelists attempting to make it for a treasure chest full of rare cards and $3 Million dollars! It's time for another fun-filled episode of…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast**

**Duelist Style!**

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Yugi Muto : Pootietang Tribe leader**

"I have NO fuckin idea which one of those bastards tried to vote ME off, but when I find out who It was, they are going STRAIGHT to the Shadow Realm! NO BULLSHIT!"

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Mako Tsunami : Pootietang Tribe**

"hahahahahahahaha! I think Yugi is still pissed because I tried to vote him off! In case you didn't guess… it was me! I voted Yugi because I think I would make a better leader! I mean look at how ripped I am!"

Mako starts flexing in front of the cameras.

"Can Yugi do this! CAN YUGI DO THIS! Fuck no! he's so skinny I don't think he has ANY muscles! Now is that the kind of leader you want? A string bean? Or do you want this bad mutha…"

A girl's voice rang out from off cameras.

"Shut your mouth!"

**Location: Middle of the Island: 12:30pm**

The Pootietang Tribe and the Gazonga Tribe stood staring each other down. Kaiba, as usual, wanted to stab Yugi in the heart with a pen. His anger was calmed when he saw Joey, still kinda black from the explosion of the timebomb sent by Tristan.

"What happened? Someone let the dog into the campfire!" Kaiba laughed.

"Kaiba! You better shut up or the only fire that your gonna feel is the burning sensation of my foot going directly up your ass!" Joey shot back. Mai smiled. _"Wow! That was actually a good one!" _She thought.

Kaiba simply crossed his arms and smiled. "Nice comeback. Did you get that off T.V. or did Yugi toss you a few bones?"

As usual, Joey's short temper soon got the best of him. "THAT DOES IT, KAIBA! YOU'RE GOIN' DOWN NOW!" Joey charged at Kaiba, but as he did in the last chapter, Kaiba simply side-stepped Joey, sending him tumbling on the ground. "Once a mutt, always a mutt."

Yami Yugi suddenly took over Little Yugi's body, then shook his head at Kaiba. "For shame, Kaiba… picking on those less intelligent than you must make you feel like a BIG man… cuz from what your ex girlfriend told me last night, its not very 'big' in the personal area! WHOOOOO!"

"YOU SON OF A SHIT!"

Kaiba charged at Yugi. Stealing a page out of Kaiba's playbook, he side-stepped Kaiba, sending him tumbling to the ground. Yami looked over his shoulder at Kaiba as he laid on the ground. Knowing anger was boiling deep in Kaiba, Yugi couldn't help but add fuel to the fire. "I SUMMON A JACKASS FACE DOWN!" He yelled out.

"THAT'S IT YOU STUPID DIRTY CUNT RAG!"

Kaiba got up and charged at Yugi, but stopped in his tracks as Jeff appeared in the corner of his eye.

"Your not trying to pick a fight, are you Seto?" Jeff asked.

Kaiba didn't answer, but walked back to his team mates, but spit on Yami Yugi's shoe as he walked past him.

"HEY BITCH! YOUR SHINING THAT SHIT LATER!"

Kaiba simply replied with a middle finger as him and Joey walked past each other going back to their tribes.

"Elementary School Duelist." Kaiba said as he walked past Joey.

"Bitch, you jack off to Ru-Paul!" Joey returned as he kept walking.

_**Author's note: For those of you who don't know, Ru-Paul is a famous cross dresser. A SCARY CROSS DRESSER!**_

Jeff stood before the Duelist with Bernadette right behind him. She gave Rex a cutesy wink. Rex cringed as he hid behind Marik.

"OK everybody, I know you're all wondering why I wanted you here from the letter the producers sent you."

"Hey!" Joey interrupted. "Whats the idea allowing Tristan to send me a fuckin TIME BOMB! WHAT KIND OF UPS BASTARDS DO YOU HAVE WORKING FOR YOU GUYS!"

"Um… the finest in southern California…" Jeff replied.

"WELL I WANT THERE ASSES FIRED!" Joey yelled.

"And whats up with the other letter we got?" Mai said, very upset. "NO FUCKIN' JUNK MAIL!" She yelled as she threw the other letter on the floor. Jeff picked up the envelop and read it.

"POOTIETANG TRIBE… YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY WON TEN MILLION DOLLARS IN THE PUBLISHER'S CLEARING HOUSE SWEEPSTAKES… how did this garbage get here! Oh well." Jeff said as he burned the envelop.

"Anyways, the reason I called you here is because I have a VERY important announcement. You see, half of you have already been voted off the island, and since it would be pointless to have a tribe with only 4 members in it, the CBS executives decided it would be a great idea to combine both tribes into one!"

Commotion rang over both tribes. "OH FUCK NO! ILL BE DAMNED IF I SHARE A TRIBE WITH THAT SON OF A BITCH AND HIS FRIENDS!" Kaiba yelled out.

"Sorry Seto, but you have no say in the matter. So for this moment on, there is no longer a Pootietang Tribe or a Gazonga Tribe. You will now be…"

"THE POOTIEZONGA TRIBE!" Yami Yugi, Joey, Rex, and Marik yelled out.

"… um… The Pootiezongas! So Yugi, Joey, Mai, Mako, get whatever belongings you have at your old camp site because your moving to what used to be the Gazonga Tribe mansion."

"FUCK THAT SHIT! NOW YOUR MAKING THOSE BASTARDS LIVE IN MY HOUSE!" Kaiba yelled. "YEAH! WHY CANT THEY STAY IN THE BACKYARD OR SOMETHING!" Mokuba said in defense for his big brother.

"Well, if you want to know the truth Seto, the REAL reason is Spike TV bought the side of Destiny Island where the Pootietang property was located to film their next big special." Jeff explained.

"Whats that?" Rex asked.

_**Commercial**_

_SATURDAY ON SPIKE TV! IT'S THE FIGHT OF THE MILLENNIUM! FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY…. ITS DRAGON BALL Z VS. FINAL FANTASY!_

_**MATCH 1: Goku Vs. Cloud Strife!**_

Cloud charges at Goku, swinging his massive sword all the while. Goku dodges the flurry of swipes, then goes Super Saiyan 3 and begins to throw an array of punches, only to have each of them blocked by Cloud.

_**MATCH 2: Vegeta Vs. Squall Leonheart!**_

Squall fires a group of bullets at Vegeta from his Gunblade, but Vegeta teleports from side to side, avoiding each one, then delivers a blow to Squall's face, but Squall counters with a slash from his blade of his weapon.

_**MATCH 3: Trunks Vs. Tidus!**_

Trunks and Tidus charge at each other as they both deliver punches and kicks to each other.

**_MATCH 4: Gohan Vs. Yuna!_**

Yuna fires at Gohan with her twin pistols, but Gohan flew into the air and prepared to shoot a huge Kamehameha wave at her.

_**MATCH 5: Piccolo Vs. Zidane!**_

Zidane runs at Piccolo and steals a bag of Senzu beans from him, then pulls out his Thief's sword and attempted to slice Piccolo in half, but the Namekian warrior backflipped out of the way and fired off a Special Beam Cannon.

_**MATCH 6: Krillin Vs. Sephiroth!**_

Sephiroth narrows his sight on Krillin as he draws his hella long sword from its holster.

"OH FUCK! OH SHIT! H-H-HOW DID THIS SHIT HAPPEN! WHY ME!" Krillin said about to piss himself.

Bulma turned to Goten and Young Trunks. "You two might as well start looking for the Dragon Balls so that we can get ready to wish Krillin's sorry ass back to life!" Bulma said as she handed them the Dragon Radar.

"Ok mom!" Young Trunks said as he took off into the air.

"Wait for me, Trunks!" Goten said as he flew upwards to try to catch his best friend.

_**It's Dragon Ball Z Vs. Final Fantasy! Live on Pay Per View! Rated R… things could get a bit… bloody! Oh yeah, and lets not forget the cussing…**_

_Vegeta is firing off a bunch of energy blasts trying to hit Squall, cussing like a madman._

_**End of Commercial**_

"Holy shit! They're filming that HERE? Man, this I've got to see!" Joey said excitedly.

"Well you guys will get your chance to see the fight… but only if you help set up for it!" Jeff said.

"OK!" Everyone shouted.

"Alright … Ex-Pootietang Tribe… grab your belongings before your camp site gets bulldozed!" Jeff said.

And so, a few hours later, Yugi, Joey, Mai, and Mako moved into the Gazonga mansion… that was still tagged from Episode 4 I remind you. At first it was total chaos, but the ex-rivals began to get along… except for Yugi and Kaiba of course.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Joey Wheeler**

"You know, when I first met Rex, I envied him… then I got to know him and I fuckin hated his guts. Now that I'm getting to know him again… well… I still hate his guts. But I'll take him over stupid ass Kaiba ANYDAY!"

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Marik Ishtar**

"I hate the fact that we have to merge tribes! But theres DEFINATLY some out of all of this… We FINALLY have a woman in the house! I am SOO gonna watch Mai when she showers! I've got video cameras in ALL of the bathrooms AND her bedroom! And ive got like at least 20 of them hidden in different areas! There is NOWHERE Mai can go undress without us knowing about it… or in this case… SEEING IT!"

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor**

"I love Marik in the most NONSEXUAL way possible… when I found out about those cameras I thought I was going to die! Speaking of dying, if that nasty ass Bernadette so much as LOOK at me funny, I'm gonna fire on her ass with this little puppy right here!"

Rex then started to pat the huge T90 Assault Rifle with a belt full of bullets diagonally across his chest.

And so, all was well in the Pootiezonga Mansion… until…

**Location : Kaiba's Secret Room : 2:34pm**

Kaiba was working on his next big project to kill Yugi. He was wearing a lab coat with goggles, and a pencil behind his ear. He toiled endlessly to make sure EVERYTHING was perfect.

"YES! FINALLY! THIS IS GOING TO BE THE DEMISE OF THE SO CALLED 'KING OF GAMES' ONCE AND FOR ALL! HAHAHAHAHA!

Suddenly, out of nowhere, A voice rang out behind Kaiba, scaring the living crap out of him.

"HELLOOOOOOOO, KAIBA!"

"WHAT THE CHUNKY FUCK!"

Kaiba turned around and looked face to face with a grinning Yami Yugi!

_It's the Yugi & Kaiba Show!_

An audience could be heard applauding from an unknown location.

_**(50's style theme music begins to play, then it shows a title screen that says, "The Yugi and Kaiba Show! With Yugi leaning against the "Y" with his arms crossed looking at Kaiba, and Kaiba is standing in between the "K" and the "A" with one hand in his pocket and the other one flipping Yugi the bird.)**_

Yugi looks around the secret room, amazed. "Kaiba, you have a LOT of time on your hands, my friend. Did your girlfriend finally dump you… oh wait… you have no girlfriend! I forgot!"

_The audience laughs._

Kaiba shook his head, wondering where all the laughing is coming from, then looks back at Yugi. "First of all, bitch, I did have a girlfriend… YOUR MOM!"

_The audience hoots and hollers._

Yugi looked back at Kaiba from across the room. "Hey, you're the only one who would date the battle axe!"

_The audience laughs again._

"So anyways Kaiba, what are you up to?" Yugi said as he starts messing around with some beakers on a sink.

"DON'T MESS WITH THOSE YOU IDIOT! ARE YOU TRYING TO BLOW US ALL TO KINGDOM COME!" Kaiba yelled as he snatched the beakers from Yugi. Kaiba started to put the beakers away, until it hit him. He turned around and gave Yugi a cold stare. "What?" Yugi asked. "Is there something stuck on my face!"

"How the FUCK did you get in here!"

"Mokuba."

Kaiba closed his eyes and shook his head. "That little piss stain… he is going to be DEALT with… personally…"

_The audience "ooohhhss"._

"YO YO YO!"

The secret door opens and Joey is standing in the middle of the doorway.

_The audience cheers and applauds as Joey enters the room._

"Whats up Yuge!" Joey said as he and Yugi slaps five. "Same ol' same ol'. Just hanging out with Kaiba!" Yugi responded.

"DAMMIT! IM GONNA FUCKIN START CHARGING ADMISSION TO GET IN HERE!" Kaiba shouted. "HOW DID YOUR CHIMP ASS IN GET HERE!"

"Mokuba."

_The audience laughs again._

"Mokuba is going the get the punishment of a lifetime when I see him…"

Joey started to fan his face. "Damn, its hot in here… did Kaiba get the chili special at Senor Taco's again?"

_The audience laughs._

"Wheeler, I'm going to…"

Yugi interrupted Kaiba in mid-threat. "Hey Kaiba! Whats this?" He asked, pointing at Kaiba's newest project.

"Is this what your going to use to kill Yugi?" Joey asked.

"Yes. Yes it is." Kaiba answered.

Yugi and Joey got wide eyed. "Come on, Kaiba… tell us how your going to kill me today!" Yugi begged.

"No."

Joey turned to the cameras. "DO YOU WANT KAIBA TO TELL US HOW HE'S GONNA KILL YUGE!"

_The audience cheers._

"WE CANT HEAR YOU! I SAID DO YOU WANT KAIBA TO TELL US HOW HE'S GONNA KILL YUGI TODAY!"

_The audience goes crazy with cheers and shouts._

"Ok, Ok, Ok!" Kaiba said as he turned to what looked like a robot. "I call this the Killbot 2.0."

"What happened to Killbot 1.0?" Yugi asked.

"Well, that one was a prototype… it blew up during the test run. Then there was Killbot 1.5… but Mokuba's stupid ass poured Coke on its and it short circuited. But THIS ONE is perfect! Behold the armor. Its Titanium steel… the only thing that can hurt it is something else that's titanium." Kaiba explained. He then took out a pointer and pointed at some blueprints pinned to a wall. Yugi and Joey sat on the ground with there legs crossed and their heads on their hands as they watched Kaiba's presentation. "By inserting a picture of Yugi into the slot, shown here, Killbot will stop at NOTHING to destroy you… hence killing you, shown here, and exacting my revenge once and for all! Hahahahaha!

_The audience "ooohhed" and "aaahhed"_

Yugi stood up and took a picture of the Killbot with an old camera, then took the picture out as it came out through a slot in the front. "So let me see if I understand this correctly… NOTHING can hurt this robot but titanium?" Kaiba shook his head. "Nope. All the dumb luck in the world wont be able to save you this time, Yugi!"

Yugi put the picture of the Killbot into the slot. "And this thing stops at nothing until it destroys its prey, right?" Yugi asked. "That's right! Now I hope your prepared for …" Kaiba finally realized what Yugi did. "YOU SON OF A …"

_The audience begins laughing like crazy._

"DESTROY… DESTORY…" The Killbot said as it was activated.

"NOOOO! DON'T DESTROY! DON'T DESTROY!"

The Killbot fired twenty heat-seeking missles. They all went in every which direction, then stopped for a moment, zeroed in on the Killbot, then shot directly at it. The audience is still laughing like crazy.

"HIT THE DIRT! SHE'S GONNA BLOW!" Joey yelled as he dove behind a lab table. Yugi and Kaiba weren't too far behind him. The missles hit the Killbot which resulted in a HUGE explosion, making a hole in the floor. Mako's face appeared in the hole as he saw Yugi, Kaiba, and Joey. "The hell are you guys doing?" He asked confused.

"YUGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" Kaiba shouted

"Opps…" Yugi said as the screen got smaller and smaller into a sphere shape around Yugi. "My bad!" Yugi said as the screen went black and the audience is heard laughing and cheering like crazy.

_**The Yugi and Kaiba Show will return after this word from out sponcers!**_

**Location : Pootiezonga Mansion : 5:14pm**

Mai came into the house all hot and sweaty, wearing a lumberjack outfit. She was helping with the set for the Dragon Ball Z/ Final Fantasy fight. She walked into the kitchen to get something to drink when she saw Marik and Mako on the couch playing video games.

"OVER THERE! HE RAN OVER THERE!" Marik shouted.

"GET HIM! ILL BACK YOU UPT!" Mako shouted.

"SURROUND HIS ASS! SURROUND HIM!"

"FIRE!"

An explosion was heard on the TV.

"YEAH! WE WON!" Mako shouted.

"YEEEEEEAHH BABY!" Marik shouted.

Mai walked up to the two of them, interrupting their victory celebration. "What the hell are you two doing in here playing XBOX Live! Why aren't you outside helping everyone else?"

"We were helping! But they sent us inside. They said we were too lazy and we got in the way. That and Marik here got a craving for barbequed lizards!" Mako said, not looking up from the TV.

"Shut up Mako! You ate more than I did!" Marik said, shoving Mako.

"Whatever. Im going back outside." Mai turned and started walking, but she suddenly fell in to the hole that was caused by the explosion of the Killbot.

"Watch that first step, Mai! It's a lu-lu!" Marik shouted.

"KISS… MY… ASS…!" Mai shouted from Kaiba's secret room.

"… You promise… OH FUCK! I JUST DIED!"

**Location : Spike TV Set on Old Pootietang property : 5:20pm**

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor**

"Mokuba's ass needs to go! I mean, he's been annoying everyone on the set!"

_Scene switches to Mokuba pulling random pranks on the stagehands, followed by some of the stagehands chasing Mokuba down._

"He even had the nerves to pinch the asses of the make-up ladies… I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE DOING THAT, DAMMIT!"

Suddenly, a pair of hands starts massaging Rex, instantly calming him down. "Ooooohhh, damn… you Spike TV girls are somethin' else… you really know how to give a kick ass massage… wanna go back to my room and get down on some REAL massages?" Rex turned around to see none other than Bernadette rubbing his shoulders.

"I would love to Rexy-Pie!" Bernadette said in here seductive voice.

Rex jumped up from the chair, knocking the camera down to where we can only see their feet. "DON'T FUCKIN COME NEAR ME OR I'LL BLAST YOUR ASS!" He shouted.

"OOOooohhh… you promise!"

Rex's feet takes off running off camera, with Bernadette in hot pursuit.

**Immunity Challenge! HOODY HOO!**

**Location : Jungle : 6:30pm**

Jeff is sitting at the control panel inside one of the trailors as he turns to address the public. On the control panel, each of the monitors showed Yugi, Joey, Mako, Mai, Kaiba, Mokuba, Marik, and Rex.

"Welcome to the Immunity Challenge. This time around, since there's only one tribe, its every Duelist for themselves! So whoever wins, they CANNOT be voted off the island. Now, this next challenge is called, Battle Royale! Each of the survivors are in different parts of the Jungle, and they must search each other out, then beat the other til there's only one standing. The duelist who survives wins the immunity! As usual, once they see the flare, that's the cue to begin!"

Jeff then walks outside and fires a flare into the air.

The scene shifts to Mokuba, who's walking around trying to find his brother. "If I could just find Seto, he'll protect me from those other assholes… then I can go back to playing more pranks… got my itching powder right here and my…"

"AY YI YI YI YI YI YI YI!"

Mokuba froze in his tracks. "WHAT WAS THAT!" Just then, a wooden bat connected with Mokuba's skull, knocking the little boy unconscience.

Mako walked up from behind him, wearing camaflauge face paint and camaflauge clothing. "Easy prey…" he said as he jumped back into the bushes.

**MOKUBA IS OUT!**

Mai walked the Jungle with her twin desert eagles. "I'm gonna bust some caps in bitches asses once they have the balls to show themselves!" she said boldly. Watching her from one side of the field was Rex, and from the other side, was Marik. The screen turned into a split screen as both Rex and Marik both said, "I'm gonna kick her ass, then rape her!" Then, out of the blue, they both popped out of the bushes and charged at Mai. She didn't raise her guns however. She didn't even look scared. She waited for them to get close enough, then jumped up into the air. Rex and Marik's skulls connected with one another, instantly knocking them both out. Mai landed on the ground in front of them.

"Stupid asses. Didn't even break a sweat to take those morons down."

**(WHACK!)**

Mai had a shocked look on her face as she fell to her knees, then flat on her face on the ground.

Mako stood behind her, then gave his battle cry.

"AY YI YI YI YI YI YI YI!"

Then, the fisherman duelist executed 4 backflips before disappearing into the brush again.

**(WHISTLE BLOWS)**

"**MARIK, REX, AND MAI ARE OUT!"**

The scene suddenly shifts to another part of the jungle, where Kaiba has Joey in a headlock. "Fuckin give up you mutt! Don't think I wont hesistate to snap your fuckin neck!" Kaiba said as he tightened the lock. Joey's face started turning red. Rather than try to break free, Joey and a huge rock in his hand. With the little bit of power he had left, he reached around and lashed the rock across Kaiba's face. Kaiba feel down with a frusterated yelp…

_**(Author's Note: If you're a Seto Kaiba fan, I strongly suggest you skip this next scene, because I wrote it JUST for Joey fans!)**_

As Kaiba was on the ground holding his face, Joey kicked him in the head, then got on top of him and started whaling on him like crazy, taking a break every once in a while to slam his head into the ground to let his fists rests, then started punching again.

"THIRD RATE DUELIST AM I! DOG, HUH? AND IM A MONKEY RIGHT! WELL IT LOOKS LIKE THIS MONKEY IS KICKING YOUR STUPID BITCH ASS, DOESN'T IT, KAIBA!

Yami Yugi came out of nowhere and pulled Joey off of Kaiba. "Calm down Joey… He's out cold." Joey spit on Kaiba while he was down, then kicked dirt on him.

_**(OK Kaiba Fans! Its ok for you to read now!)**_

**(WHISTLE BLOWS)**

"**KAIBA IS OUT!"**

Yami Yugi and Joey got into fighting stances. "Joey… you're my best friend, but that doesn't mean I'm going to hold back in this fight."

"Me either man! Don't go easy on me because were friends. Otherwise you could give me ALL your rarest cards and I still wont forgive you!"

Yami smiled, then got ready to launch an attack, when another whacking sound was heard.

"Hey Yugi, did you hear that… Yugi?"

Yami Yugi hit the ground, unconscience. "Yugi! Yuge?" Joey shouted. But then he had a thought. "Nice try man. Tryin' ta play possum so that I lower my guard, then have you kick my ass! Nice try, but I INVENTED that technique! Now im gonna…."

**(WHACK!)**

Joey hit the ground unconscience. Mako appeared behind him, and gave his battle cry one last time.

"AY YI YI YI YI YI YI YI!"

**(WHISTLE BLOWS)**

**YUGI AND JOEY ARE OUT! THE WINNER IS MAKO TSUNAMI!**

Jeff ran up to congratulate Mako. "Congratulations, Mako! You've won the Immunity Challenge! Which means you cannot be voted off the island! Now when our survivors come to, we will…"

**(WHACK!)**

Jeff hits the ground unconscience. Mako dove back into the bushes, only leaving his battle cry…

" AY YI YI YI YI YI YI YI!"

**Location : Tribal Council : 10:52pm**

Everyone stood before Jeff, holding ice packs over the spots where they got hit by Mako's bat. Everyone including Jeff.

"Hey, sorry guys… I guess I got a little bit too into that one, huh?" Mako said, trying to break the silence.

"… Bitch, you better sleep with one eye open." Marik said angrily.

"ANYWAYS, welcome to the first tribal council that involves all of you… I've got a fuckin throbbing headache, so hurry the fuck up and vote so I can take some pain killers and go to bed."

Yami Yugi walked up to the voting box. "Since I cant vote for Mako's bitch ass, bye Mokuba."

Yami Yugi returned, followed by Kaiba. "Wheeler, I don't know how you survived this long, but your next on my kill list!"

Kaiba returned, followed by Joey. "Kaiba, as much as I hate you, I hate Mokuba just as much. His annoying ass has GOT to go!"

Joey returned, followed by Rex. "Mokuba, you've been a pain in the ass for WAY too long! This time, your gone!"

As soon as everyone was done, Jeff counted the votes, then read them off. "Mokuba… douse your own fuckin torch and get off the island. The tribe has spoken! I'm out of here… I feel dizzy…"

Security picked Mokuba up and carried him away, with another officer dousing his torch. "Seto! HELP!" Mokuba shouted, trying to kick himself free. The other duelists walked back to the mansion, shaken from the blows to their head.

"Mokuba! Just take care of Kaiba Corp, ok?" Kaiba yelled.

"Oh… OK SETO!" Mokuba called out.

"Now… I'm gonna go home… rest up, and kill Yugi… no… scratch that… I'm killing Wheeler's scrawny ass first! Then I'm gonna…" Kaiba collapsed to the ground from dizziness.

So we end tonight's show by saying… Kids… DO NOT hit others in the head with a wooden baseball bat… the results are NOT cool… and you could have a lawsuit put on you. Ok, I did my part, so NOBODY can use the, "Shortstop189 hit people with bats in his story!" excuse!

**Ladies and Gentlemen, yet another duelist has been voted off… but what who's next? Find out next time on Survivor! Duelist Style! Ok, wait… Mokuba isn't a Duelist either… but the rest are! Just thought I would get that out in the open!**

**OK Everyone! Please R&R!**


	9. The Decisive Battle for Christmas Pt 1

For the person who sent me that email about wanting me to make a Fanfiction about the Dragon Ball Z/Final Fantasy fight, I'll do it, but… I can't until I play Final Fantasy X-2… I admit it… I haven't played that one. And I must have ALL the facts straight because I don't do half assed stories. In the meantime, here's Episode 9! Enjoy everyone! PS: I know its not Christmas now, but remember, its just a story.

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor anything else I'm using… Just Bernadette… SHES FICTIONAL!

The Holiday season has arrived on Destiny Island as the once hot, tropical, exotic weather became cold, windy, and snowy. Nothing that the CBS crew couldn't handle though. In the Mansion of the Pootiezonga Tribe, the heater was on full blast as the whole house felt like a sauna. Seto Kaiba woke up, still a bit tired, but trying to get his memories together, thanks to the assault from Joey from the last Immunity Challenge.

"Ok… I was susposed to kill someone today… oh yeah… YUGI! No, wait… it was someone else… aww, fuck it. Yugi's always first on my hit list…"

Kaiba looked up from his bed to see Yami Yugi standing in the doorway, staring at him. Yami of course, had his smirk on his face. "What are you doing, Kaiba?" Kaiba looked Yami Yugi up and down, then looked back at him. "Fuckin' starin' at your bitch ass!"

Yami Yugi made a false shocked look, then put on his game face. "Better watch that tone with me, Seto."

"What the piss are you gonna do if I don't!"

Yami Yugi put on his smirk once again. "I'll beat that ass. You know the routine."

Kaiba yawned, then stretched. "I should fuck you up right here and now. But your lucky I gotta piss like a race horse."

"I gotta piss too."

Yami Yugi and Kaiba looked at each other, then looked at Kaiba's bathroom across the room. Then, without warning, they both took off running towards the bathroom. Kaiba thought smart this time. He let Yami Yugi get ahead of him, then grabbed a fist-full of his hair and pulled him down to the ground. Yami Yugi went down with a hard thud. Kaiba jumped over Yami and slammed and locked the door.

"I DID IT! I BEAT YUGI!" Kaiba shouted from the bathroom.

Yami Yugi wasn't sore at all. Instead, he got up, and left the room. He returned ten minutes later with a lock picking kit.

Kaiba was taking a hot shower. The whole bathroom was misty due to all the steam. Kaiba turned the water off long enough to wash up. As the water went off, Kaiba heard the picking at the door.

"_Is he doing what I think he's doing!"_ Kaiba thought.

Suddenly, the door was heard quietly opening, then closed, then locked.

"I KNEW YOU WERE FUCKIN GAY! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, YUGI!"

The door suddenly flew open as Bernadette stood there, NAKED, facing Kaiba! "We can get dress quicker if we shower TOGETHER, Kaiba-baby!" she said.

Yugi stood in the hallway with a HUGE shit-eating grin on his face. Joey walked down the hall to greet his best friend. "What did you do this time!" Joey said with a smile on his face.

"5…4…3…2…1…"

Yami Yugi pointed toward's Kaiba's room. The exact minute he pointed, Kaiba could be heard screaming at the top of his lungs in a very high pitched voice! Both Yami and Joey feel to the floor laughing!

**7 Duelists…**

**Yugi Muto… Joey Wheeler… Seto Kaiba… Rex Raptor… Mai Valentine… Mako Tsunami… Marik Ishtar… **

**2 Prizes…**

**3 Million Dollars…. Treasure Chest full of rare cards…**

**WHO WILL BE THE WINNER! FIND OUT WHO GET'S THE BOOT NEXT ON…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

It was a cold, windy day on Destiny Island as Christmas Eve rolled around. So cold that CBS just used the cameras that were already planted inside the Pootiezonga Mansion so they wouldn't have to freeze their asses off going outside. Inside the Mansion, everybody was sitting on the couch with the couch with the heater blaring as usual… all except Kaiba, who was sitting at the kitchen table, plotting on how he was going to get Yugi for the whole bathroom incident.

"What's wrong, Kaiba! Don't tell me your mad at me because I got you some shower play!" Yami shouted from the living room. Nothing. "Come on, Kaiba, you know you like your with a few extra rolls!" Yami shouted again. Still nothing. About 3 minutes later, Kaiba ran out with a huge knife, right at Yami! Yami got up and jumped over Rex and Joey, who were laid out on the floor, and ran through the house, with Kaiba chasing him down. Mako looked back at them. "Uhh…" Rex shook his head. "I am SO glad that wasn't me in that shower or I would have cut Yugi's head off and had a hobo shit down his throat."

"So, what the hell are we watching, Joey?" Mai asked. Joey looked back at her. "ONLY THE GREATEST CHRISTMAS SPECIAL EVER TO AIR ON TV! I WATCH THIS BITCH EVERY YEAR!"

Joey responded. "It had better be good, Wheeler." Marik said, sipping some hot chocoloate.

"Trust me… AWWW YEAH! HERE IT COMES!"

Joey, Rex, Mai, Mako, and Marik zoned in on the TV.

_**AND NOW, FOR THE NETWORK PREMIER OF… LIL' JON SAVES CHRISTMAS!**_

A couple elves walk up to Lil' Jon's house and knocks on the door. Lil' Jon answers it, and notices there are elves on his doorstep.

"…**_WHAT!"_**

"Lil' Jon… you have to help us… Santa has been kidnapped by the evil Snow Vizier! He's threatening to keep Christmas all for himself!" one of the elves cried.

"And if he does that, EVERY kid on Earth will be sad when Christmas comes! And an obnoxious rapper is the only thing that the Snow Vizier is weak against… so what do you say, Lil' Jon? Will you save Christmas!" the other elf pleaded.

Lil' Jon thought for a moment. **_"…YEAH!"_**

The elves cheered. "YEAAA!"

"Come on! We'll take Santa's sleigh to get to the Snow Vizier's Ice Castle! Then…"

_**We interrupt Lil' Jon Saves Christmas for this important news bulletin!**_

Joey suddenly shot up from the couch, throwing his hot chocolate every which way. "WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE BASTARDS THINKING! OF ALL THE SHOWS THEY COULD HAVE FRIGGIN INTERRUPTED, THEY PICKED MY SHOW!" He shouted.

"Yeah, seriously! The fuckin' plot is hard enough to follow as it is!" Mako said.

"Fuckin Fox Network…" Rex complained

"Hey, shut up! This could be important!" Mai said.

A news reporter sat in a newsroom, next to a screen that said, "INFILTRATION". "This is Richard Bagwell reporting to you live from Fox Studios. An unknown group has infiltrated Industrial Illusions Inc. and is holding everyone inside hostage! Reporting live from the outside of I2, here's Cameron Miza… Cameron?"

Mai called out to Yugi and Kaiba. "HEY! BITCHES! GET IN HERE! YOU MIGHT WANNA SEE THIS!" Kaiba had Yugi on the floor, trying to jam the knife into Yami's heart, while Yami had both Kaiba's arms, trying to force the knife away from him. "This had better be good, Valentine!" Kaiba yelled out as he got off of Yami. The two of them walked back into the living room and watched the tv. Yami quickly took the knife from Kaiba when his guard was down.

"This is Cameron Miza, reporting live outside Industrial Illusions… where nothing has happened yet, but an inside source tells us that everyone is scared and the president of Industrial Illusions, Maximillion Pegasus, is nowhere to be found. Another source told us he participated on the hit show Survivor! Duelist Style, but was voted off on the very first episode… ever since then, no one has heard from him. We will continue to cover this breaking story. Back to you, Richard.

"Thanks Cameron… until we get an update on the Industrial Illusions Hostage situation, we take you back to your regularly scheduled program, already in progress."

Kaiba walked away from the living room. "Sucks to be Pegasus." He said.

"Knowing that damn Pegasus, he's probably in a gay orgy in the middle of Germany!" Rex said.

"Listen to me everyone. We have GOT to free those hostages and save Industrial Illusions!" Yami Yugi proclaimed. Everyone looked up at him. "Why? Leave that shit for the police, Yuge!" Joey said.

"I wouldn't help that girly ass man if my life depended on it!" Kaiba shouted from across the room.

Yami looked over at him. "It DOES depend on it, Kaiba… Kaiba Corporation IS your life, is it not!"

"Yeah… so what you little fuck?"

"Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't Kaiba Corporation's products revolve mostly around Duel Monsters?"

"Yes… what's your point?"

"So, if something should happen to Industrial Illusions, Kaiba Corp. would be nothing… you would have to go back to making weapons of war. THAT'S my point!"

"OH HELL NO! FUCK THAT!"

Yami Yugi turned to the other Duelists. "And that goes for us too! If something happens to the cards… we would be stuck with the same ol' shit, day in and day out… Duel Monsters would get boring, and eventually die… where would we be?"

"WE WOULD HAVE TO FUCKIN GET REAL JOBS!" Joey shouted.

Mai started to day dream…

_Mai was behind a cash register at McDonalds, wearing a lavender shirt with a "M" emblem on one side and a name tag that said "MAI" on the other. She took a family's order. "You want any fries with that?" She asked them. "No thank you. Just the cheeseburgers will do." The father responded. "Hey, I've seen her before, daddy! She used to rock out on this one game… um… what was it? It got old and lame because no more cards were made for it…" the son said. "… Duel Monsters…?" Mai said. "YEAH THAT'S THE ONE!"_

Mai snapped out of her day dream and screamed the top of her voice. Everyone jumped and held their ears. "FUCK THAT! IM NOT WORKIN AT NO MOTHERFUCKIN MCDONALDS! WERE SAVING INDUSTRIAL ILLUSIONS! AND ANYONE WHO DOESN'T COME GETS A FUCKIN BULLET IN THE BRAIN! YOU HEAR ME!"

Yami Yugi, Joey, Rex, Marik, and Mako were all huddled together, scared from Mai's little outburst. They all nodded their heads. Kaiba, trying to play it though, pulled out his cell phone. "… your lucky I don't have anything else better to do…"

After a quick phone call, a Kaiba Corporation Helicoptor touched down in front of the Pootiezonga Mansion. Each of the Duelists prepared as they got their snow gear and their Duel Disks full of cards and prepared to load in on the chopper. Jeff Probst ran up to them in his snow wear as he tried to stop them.

"Where the fuck are you all going! Don't you know we have a show to do?" He shouted through the whirling of the chopper blades.

"Sorry Probst, but our reputations as Duelists are on the line!" Mai said as she pushed Jeff aside. Yami Yugi walked past him. "Don't worry. We'll be back in time for the Immunity Challenge!" he assured Jeff. Jeff however wasn't buying it.

"I don't believe you!" He turned and signaled a bunch of cameramen as they loaded inside the helicopter. "We're going with you! You aren't getting out of this show until it's OVER!" Yami Yugi shrugged. "Whatever floats your boat!"

Bernadette came running up afterwards. "Don't forget meeeee!" she shouted seductively. Rex saw her running at the copter from his seat. "OH HELL NAW!" He jumped up and ran to the control panel, shoved the pilot aside, and slammed the lever that closes the door.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU WAITING FOR! GET THIS BITCH INTO THE AIR BEFORE THAT FAT COW FINDS A WAY TO GET ON BOARD!" Rex shouted in a panic. At that moment, the pilot took off into the air, leaving poor Bernadette behind.

**Location : Inside Industrial Illusions**

Everyone was huddled together, scared. They had no idea why this group of terrorists decided to hold up a card company. But one thing was certain, they had to protect the cards at all costs. Two of the terrorists had two of Pegasus's most loyal flunkies, Croquet and Kemo, scared in a corner.

"Now… your gonna tell us where Pegasus is, and your gonna do it now… or else!" one of the terrorists said. "W-W-W-WE ALREADY TOLD YOU… WE DON'T KNOW!" Croquet yelled out. "Yeah… after that survivor thing… no one has seen him since…" Kemo said out of fear. "We think you're lying!" said the other Terrorist. Suddenly, another one walks up to them. "We found where they keep all their Duel Monsters cards! It's the fuckin' mother load!" He said.

"OH NO!" Croquet and Kemo shouted.

"Great! Show us!" said the other terrorist. The 3rd terrorist lead the other two to the room. Out the corner of his eye, he saw a frightened Industrial Illusions Secretary scared against a wall. The 3rd terrorist walked up to her. "Hey baby… you don't need to be frightened… come ride my 'Train of Love' and…" The 2nd terrorist shoved him. "KEEP GOING, YOU BASTARD!"

Kemo and Croquet looked out the window. "Pegasus! Where are you…" they said.

**Location : Kaiba Corp. Helicopter**

Everyone was seated in recliners as they watched the overhead tv as they enjoyed their trip to America.

_**We now return to the network premiere of Lil' Jon Saves Christmas!**_

A red sleigh touched down in a snowy field as Lil Jon and the two elves got out of it.

"If we go any farther on sleigh, the Snow Vizier will know that were here, so we have to go on foot, ok Lil' Jon?" The elf said.

"_**OK!"**_

The three of them walked walked until they reached a bridge. Just as they were attempting to cross, a troll popped out from underneath.

"BLAH! I AM A TROLL! I AM GOING TO EAT YOU! BLAH!"

The elves grabbed each other. "OH NO! IT'S A BRIDGE TROLL! LIL JON! SAVE US!" they both said.

"_**WHAT!"**_

The troll got wide-eyed. "Lil Jon! THE Lil Jon? OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD! YOU ARE MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE! I LOVED THAT SONG, SHAKE IT LIKE A SALT SHAKER! MAY I PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH!"

"…_**YEAH!"**_

Lil Jon signed the autograph, then gave it to the Troll. "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD! MY SISTER IS GOING TO FLIP WHEN SHE SEES I GOT LIL' JON'S AUTOGRAPH!" The troll said as he went back under his bridge.

"I guess that means we can cross!" The elf said. "HORRAY!"

"Come on Lil' Jon! We got a holiday to save!"

"_**OK!"**_

Suddenly, the TV went off.

"WHAT THE FUCK, MAN!" Joey shouted.

"We have arrived at Industrial Illusions." Said the pilot over the intercom.

The doors opened as Kaiba was the first one out. "Let's get this shit over with so I can go home and go back to killing Yugi's ass."

"And I can go back to pissing Kaiba off." Yami Yugi said as he walked outside. Mako was the third person off. "Man, is anybody else confused on that special we were watching?"

As soon as the Duelists were off, Joey looked around. "Industrial Illusions is in a forest."

"No, you fuckin moron! If we go any closer, those terrorists will know were coming. Were gonna have to sneak in from the sewers!" Kaiba said. He pulled out some blueprints (Kaiba is famous for those, as you can see!) and laid them out on the ground. Everyone gathered around the blueprints.

"If we follow the cave in the middle of the forest, it will take us to the main pipelines to I2, then getting us inside from the broiler room, we should be able to sneak attack those terrorists, if I remember this place correctly." Kaiba explained.

Yugi turned to Jeff and the others. "You guys stay here. This could get a bit ugly."

"Ok, but here. Take these with you!" Jeff said as he tossed each of them what looked like a hat.

"The fuck are these for?" Rex said, looking it over. "There's a small hidden camera in those hats. Try to give our viewers a good show!" Jeff said. They each put their hat on, then took off running into the forest.

Kaiba lead them to the cave, which eventually turned into a pipemaze. "Shit, how are we going to get thru this?" Marik asked.

"I summon Vorse Raider!" Kaiba shouted. "CUT THAT SHIT UP!"

The Vorse Raider executed a huge slash from it's axe, dicing up the pipes. The Pipes hid a walkway that lead straight to the Industrial Illusions Broiler Room.

**Location : Card Factory inside Industrial Illusions**

The Card Factory was a large facility that made every Duel Monsters card known to man. It was hidden underground, but somehow, the Terrorists were able to find the way in. Each worker were being held at gun point by the terrorists as the two in charge looked the factory over.

"I must say, I'm impressed!" The first one said. The second one shook it's head. "It's a damn shame we have to DESTROY it."

"NO! YOU CANT! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" Kemo said.

"WILL SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" Croquet cried.

"Be quiet before I shoot you in your fuckin ear!" said a bigger terrorist.

"Ok everyone! This is it! It's time to burn this mother down!" said another terrorist.

"YOU BITCHES ARENT DOING SHIT!"

Everyone turned to see Yami Yugi, Kaiba, Joey, Mai, Rex, Marik, and Mako standing across the factory, Duel Disks already activated.

"I should have known you rat bastards would be showing up here…" said a terrorist.

"What the hell took you so long anyways!" said another one.

"You fuckers talk like you've been expecting us or something." Kaiba said.

"WE WERE! WERE GOING TO KILL YOU ASSHOLES ONCE AND FOR ALL!" said the first terrorist. He was obviously the leader.

"You know, you all talk a lot of shit behind those black masks." Rex said.

"Yeah, why don't you take that shit off… or is it because your all just too ugly!" Yami taunted.

"You heard them, everyone… lets give the bitches what they want!" And with that, the terrorists took off their black clothing and masks. They revealed themselves to the Duelists, shocking the hell out of them.

"WHY DOESN'T IT SURPRISE ME THAT IT WOULD BE YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS PULLIN' THIS SHIT!" Yami Yugi shouted angrily.

"You've got some nerve showing your gay ass mugs around here!" Joey said just as pissed.

"What, did you dicks think you were going to see the last of us…" said the leader of the terrorists… who was really… Ash Ketchum!

Ash was backed by his Pokemon crew… Misty, Brock, Tracey, Gary Oak, May, and Max!

"You bitches obviously didn't learn your lesson from the last time we bitch slapped you when you tired pulling some shit like this!" Mako said.

Ash folded his arms. "THAT was a mistake. We admit, facing you hairy cunts head on was the stupidest thing we could have done… but then we got an idea… to hit you where it hurts… the source of your powers!"

**(Author's note: If you guys are lost, I originally created a fanfic called Duel Monsters VS. Pocket Monsters, but I pulled it down cuz it wasn't really getting any reviews… It was the first crossover fan fiction I've ever written. Would u like me to put it up again? Hit me up and let me know and I will.)**

Misty stepped forward. "If we destroyed Industrial Illusions, you all would be NOTHING!"

Mai shook her head. "You guys are nothing but a bunch of immature little kids!"

"Let's kick their asses again so that I can get home! I don't wanna spend my Christmas listening to these whiny bitches!" Rex said.

"Why don't you try it, you long hair homo!" Gary shouted at Rex.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! ILL KILL YOU!" Rex shot back. Yami Yugi held his arm out in front of Rex. "Hang on a second, Rex… don't you think their acting funny?" he said.

"What do ya mean, Yuge?" Joey asked.

"Think about it… last time we fought them, we udderly kicked their asses! Now their raring to go again… it doesn't seem right."

"Maybe they got better monsters? I mean, it was damn there two years ago that this happened, Yugi." Mai said.

"AND they don't have that Mewtwo thing with them…" Mako said.

"WAIT A FUCKIN MINUTE!" Marik shouted. Everyone looked at him. "YOU ALL FOUGHT BEFORE! WHEN WAS THIS!"

"It was a long time ago… these bitches took my grandfather, Mokuba, and Serenity, and forced us into a battle with our Duel Monsters vs. their Pocket Monsters. Of course, we kicked that ass, but then they unleashed this fuckin super Pokemon, Mewtwo, and it ALMOST kicked all our asses… thank god for the heart of the cards!" Yami Yugi explained to Marik.

"WHY THE FUCK WASN'T I INVITED! LAST I CHECKED, I WAS PART OF YU-GI-OH! TOO!"

"Because you were still an evil bitch back then and we all hated your ass." Kaiba said.

"…ooohh… I knew that…" Marik said.

The Pokemon crew stood there, annoyed and bored. "If you assholes are don't talking to yourself, we'd love to kill you, blow this place up, and go back to Kanto." Misty said.

"You skinny bitch! You aren't gonna do shit!" Mai shouted.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME!"

"YOU HEARD ME, CARROT TOP!"

Ash turned to May, Max, and Tracey. "Hey, you guys torch the cards in the card vault. We'll fight these fuckers!"

"Ok Ash! Good luck!" May said as she turned and started running towards the card vault. Max and Tracey went after her. Ash however kept watching May's butt as she ran. "Damn… I ain't never seen an ass like that…" Then he turned back to the Duelists. Are you ready? GO PIKACHU! BULBASAUR! CHIKORITA! TAILLOW! CHARIZARD! TOTODILE!"

Ash's Pokemon all stood staring down the duelists.

Brock and Misty ran beside Ash.

"GO ONIX! GRAVELER! FORRETRESS! MUDKIP! LOTAD!" Brock yelled as he tossed a bunch of red and white balls into the air. The balls popped open as all Brock's Pokemon stood beside Ash's. it was Misty's turn now.

"POLIWHIRL! STARYU! STARMIE! GYARADOS! AND… **(sighs) **fuckin Psyduck…"

Misty's Pokemon entered the battle lines, with Psyduck holding his head, walking around aimlessly.

"Psy yi yi…"

"PSYDUCK YOU STUPID ASS DUCK! GET YOUR DUMBASS BACK OVER HERE!"

The Duelists shook their heads.

"Is that shit susposed to scare us!" Rex shouted.

Yami Yugi turned to Joey, Rex, and Mako. "You guys, go after those other three bitches! If they destroy those cards then we flew all the way out here for nothing!"

"Count on us, Yuge! Those fuckers wont know what hit em!" Joey said.

"Come on! I'll be damn if I end up having to actually work for a living!" Mako said.

Joey, Mako, and Rex took off running, trying their best to catch up with May, Max, and Tracey.

"_You know… if, god forbid, they do destroy those cards… maybe I'll work at Victoria's Secret! Ohhh hell yeah!" _ Rex thought as he started to drool. Joey looked back at him.

"The fuck is wrong with you, Raptor?"

"HUH? Oh, nothing… I was thinking about having a Christmas Pizza later." Rex said.

"Yeah… with Fruit Punch!" said Mako.

"Oh we'll eat… just as soon as we whoop some Poke Ass!" Joey declared

Yami Yugi stepped forward. "I SUMMON CELTIC GUARDIAN! BIG SHIELD GARDNA! BUSTER BLADER! GAIA THE FIERCE KNIGHT! DARK MAGICIAN GIRL! AND DARK MAGICIAN!

Kaiba stepped forward. "I SUMMON VORSE RAIDER! SWORD STALKER! SPEAR DRAGON! AND ALL THREE BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGONS!"

Mai stepped up. "I SUMMON THE HARPIE LADY SISTERS! AND HARPIES PET DRAGON! THEN ACTIVATE HARPIE'S PHOENIX FORMATION!"

Marik stood there… staring down Gary… and Gary did the same thing… the two of them were in a heated match! This was it! The Ultimate Battle for Christmas was about to begin!

**Locatioin : Kaiba Corp. Helicoptor**

Jeff, the camera crew, and the pilot sat inside the helicopter playing Go Fish.

"Got any 10s?" the Pilot asked.

"Go fish." Said one of the Cameramen. "Got any 3s?"

"Go fish." Said Jeff.

"Hey, you think Yugi and the others will be ok in there… you know, going up against terrorists and all?" the other cameraman asked.

"They'll be fine. Believe me, if they can survive day in and day out from the shit that I've seen, this should be nothing more than a walk in the park for them." Jeff explained.

"Ok, I guess your right. Got any 5s?"

"Go fish."

**And so, the Battle for the Cards begins! Will Ash, Misty, and Brock get the best of Yugi, Kaiba, and Mai? What kind of Battle will we see when Gary Oak takes on Marik Ishtar! And will Joey, Rex, and Mako be able to prevent May, Max, and Tracey from destroying ALL the Duel Monsters cards! All these questions answered next episode of Survivor: Duelist Style!**

**OK guys, I thought I would try something different. I hope you like it! I had to give you all something to look forward too, so I made this one a two parter! Please R&R!**

**OH, and I'm SO sorry this is so short. I'm gonna be busy the next couple of days so I wont have time to update for a while.**


	10. The Decisive Battle for Christmas Pt 2

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor anything else I'm using

Duel Monsters and Pocket Monsters stared each other down as an epic rematch was about to be played out once again. Marik tried to reach for his deck, thinking Gary would do the same thing with his Pokeballs, but he didn't make a move. He stood there, staring at Marik, with the same blank look on his face.

"_Why doesn't this bastard draw a monster? Is he waiting for the right moment? Bideing his time? Or is he making fun of me!"_ Marik thought. He pointed at Gary. "WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR! ARE YOU GONNA FIGHT ME OR NOT?"

Gary shook his head. "You aren't worth my time."

"WHAT! IF I HAD MY MILLENNIUM ROD WITH ME, ID CONTROL YOUR MIND SO FUCKIN FAST!"

"There's only ONE person I want to fight…" Gary said as he stared at Kaiba.

"Why do you want to destroy Duel Monsters? It's not just us Duelist you'll be hurting… you'll also hurt millions of kids around the world!" Yami Yugi said.

"Why! We already told you why!" Ash shouted. "Pokemon used to be at the top! We took over TV, Video Games, toys… everything! But that all changed the day Yu-Gi-Oh! debuted… ever since that boring ass card game came out, EVERYONE had to buy decks and traded all their Pokemon cards! Then you took over EVERYTHING… leaving us with what! Forgotten memories! Then, as if that weren't bad enough, you did the one thing that broke the camel's back!"

"Which is…" Mai said.

"YOU STOLE OUR SPOT ON SURVIVOR!"

"Now your just full of shit!" Kaiba said.

"Jeff called US and asked US if WE wanted to do the show!" Yami Yugi said.

"Exactly! You bastards stole the spotlight from us AGAIN!" Misty said.

"It was susposed to be called Survivor: Pokemon Style! But CBS thought it would be better for a bunch of fuckin ratings to use Duelists, so what were we left with! NOTHING!" Brock said.

Kaiba crossed his arms and closed his eyes. "Is that what this is all about? You guys are all just pissed off because the kids found out what the SUPERIOR show was! They finally realized how gay Pokemon was and came to their senses! I mean, come on! You barely had ANY battles on your show! And when you did, they WERENT all that impressive. All you did was go around acting like Boy Scouts, helping ever damn person you meet and talk about friendship this, friendship that… you should have that bitch Tea on your show. She would fit in PERFECTLY with you losers!"

"YOU'VE GOT SOME NERVE!" Gary shouted at Kaiba.

"And you… are you still mad because my Blue Eyes White Dragon bitch slapped you up and down Duelist Stadium the last time we met in the ring?"

"You know what? We only lost because you had those cheap ass Egyptian God Cards!" Gary shouted. "But we've been doing some research on you. Oh, we've been watching your boring ass show, and we know that you gave your God Cards back to that one bitch… Isis or whatever… and THAT was how you beat Mewtwo!"

"Tch! So what! Just because we don't have our God Cards doesn't mean we still wont whoop that ass! Right team!" Yami Yugi shouted.

"YEAAH!"

"Then why don't you prove it?" Ash said.

"We will… I've honestly got better things I can be doing besides looking at you little punks for another second." Kaiba declared.

Kaiba then turned to Yami Yugi. "I'll let you work with me just this once. But don't get any ideas. I'm only doing this because I wanna get the fuck out of this stupid ass factory and beat the hell out of these assholes once and for all."

Yami Yugi looked back at Kaiba. "Agreed. No funny stuff til this is all over."

Kaiba looked back at the Pokemon Trainers. "Good… because I cant even look at your boney ass for more than 2 seconds without wanting to sock you in your damn mouth."

Yami Yugi also looked back at the Trainers. "And the sight of your balls through those tight ass pants makes me wanna throw up." Then he put his game face on. "CELTIC GUARDIAN! GAIA! BUSTER BLADER! ATTACK THOSE SESEME STREET REJECTS!"

Celtic Guardian and Buster Blader charged at Ash's Pokemon, then jumped up into the air as they got ready to bring down their swords.

"GUYS! GET OUT OF THE WAY!"

Each one of Ash's Pokemon scattered, but jumped directly at a charging Gaia. Gaia brought back his twin jousting swords then lunged them forward, narrowly missing each one as the Pokemon were able to avoid that attack as well.

"PIKACHU! USE YOUR THUNDERBOLT ON GAIA!"

Pikachu's body began to light up as it was surrounded by electricity. A huge wave of electricity shot out and went directly for Gaia.

"OH NO YOU DON'T, BITCH! I ACTIVATE MIRROR FORCE! IT REFECTS YOUR ATTACK BACK AT YOU!"

Pikachu's Thunderbolt bounced off a Mirror-like screen and shot directly back at Pikachu.

"PIKACHU! USE YOUR AGILITY! NOW!"

Pikachu dashed out of the way with tremendous speed, then went after back after Gaia. The yellow mouse moved so fast, not even Yami could follow it's movements.

"NOW USE IRON TAIL!" Ash ordered.

Pikachu jumped up and brought it's tail down. the tail suddenly turned gray as it went down hard on Gaia's head. The impact was enough to destroy Gaia! Yugi dropped to one knee, holding his side.

"Yugi! Are you ok? Whats wrong!" Mai asked. "Be careful! Our monsters are real, so if they're destroyed, WE feel the damage…" Marik shook his head. "You just HAD to make this a Shadow Game, didn't you?" Yami gave Marik a cold stare. "BITCH, HOW ELSE WOULD WE HAVE BEATEN THESE ASSHOLES! WITH A BUNCH OF FUCKIN HOLOGRAMS!" Marik was silent.

"BULBASAUR! CHIKORITA! USE VINEWHIP ON THAT ELF!" Ash shouted.

Celtic Guardian quickly turned around as it was lassoed by the two grass Pokemon. It struggled with all of it's might, but it couldn't break free.

"Oh no! Buster Blader! Cut those vines and save Celtic Guardian!" Yami ordered.

"Taillow, Use Agility! Then Wing Attack!"

The little black bird Pokemon whisked around Buster Blader as it tried to make it's way towards it's hogtied Duel Monster Companion, but it was too late. Buster Blader was being hit with a barrage of slaps from Taillow's tiny, but powerful wings. Yugi felt each hit as if he were being slapped in the face by a couple of 2 by 4s.

"NOW CHARIZARD! USE FLAME THROWER ON CELTIC GUARDIAN!"

Charizard flew up into the air, then shot a wave flames down at Celtic Guardian. Chikorita and Bulbasaur let go long enough to get their vines out of the way as the flames went down hard, toasting Celtic Guardian. Another monster went down as Yami dropped to his knees.

"_Damn… Mai was right… they must have been training since the last time we met! There's no way he was this strong two years ago!" _Yami thought.

"NOW TOTODILE! USE HYDRO PUMP ON BUSTER BLADER!"

The little blue gator began to do a little dance, then got serious as he jumped up into the air and fired a wave that looked similar to Charizard's attack, but in water form. Taillow jetted out of the way as the water connected with Buster Blader, sending him flying through a wall, obliterating him.

"AAAAGGGGHHH!" Yami shouted as the impact came out of his life force.

"Yugi! DON'T YOU LOSE THIS DAMN FIGHT!" Kaiba shouted. Yami looked back at Kaiba. "Kaiba! Do NOT underestimate them! They're a hell of a lot stronger than the last time we faced them!"

"Hmph! Once a weakling, always a weakling."

Yami struggled to his feet. "I… play… MAGICAL HATS!"

Out of nowhere, four large black top hats with question marks embedded on them feel from the air and covered Dark Magician, Dark Magician Girl, and Big Shield Gardna. Yami forced a smile on his face. "Now… if you wanna finish me off… have to FIND my monsters!"

"Are you that desperate that you have to use that stupid hat trick? And besides, you forget I have SIX monsters!" Ash said. "EVERYONE! ATTACK ALL THOSE HATS!"

A barrage of electricity, water, grass, and fire was launched on the Magical Hats, destroying each one. Something was wrong. Yami Yugi was still standing. "What the fuck? Why aren't you dead!" Ash yelled at Yami.

As the smoke cleared, Big Shield Gardna stood with it's large shield in front of him, and Dark Magician and Dark Magician Girl crouched behind him.

"There's a reason he's called Big Shield Gardna… he blocks attacks for one turn, no matter how strong they are! NOW DARK MAGICIAN! DARK MAGIC ATTACK! DARK MAGICIAN GIRL, USE DARK BURNING MAGIC!"

The two magicians jumped up and unleashed their attacks on the unsuspecting Pokemon.

"NO! EVERYONE! GET OUT OF THE WAY!" Ash panicked. But it was too late. By the time the Pokemon had noticed, the attacks connected, sending each one flying in a different direction.

Marik and Mai cheered. "YEAH YUGI! WAY TO KICK ASS FOR THE TEAM!" Mai shouted. "WE BAD! YOU KNOW IT! WE BAD! WE SHOW IT!" Marik cheered. "You bitches cheer like you won this damn thing already. Did you forget about Taillow?" Everyone looked up to see Taillow zeroing in on Dark Magician Girl. Yami shook his head. "What a desperate ass move… Big Shield Gardna… do something about that overgrown fly."

Big Shield Gardna walked in front of Dark Magician Girl, then pulled out a tennis racket from some unknown location and batted Taillow across the factory.

"Now it's over." Yugi announced.

Ash growled. "Everyone! RETURN!" Each Pokemon returned to its respectful Pokeball… except for Pikachu, who rested in Ash's arms. "Good job guys. I'm proud of you all. You did EXACTLY what you were susposed to do." Yami cocked his eyebrow. _"What did he mean by that…"_

Misty stepped forward, then snapped her fingers and pointed at Mai. Mai shook her head as she zoned her sight in on Misty. "That ho has some nerve! Watch out! I'm gonna slap that pony tail out of her damn hair!" Mai shouted as she stormed past the boys.

"It's four monsters against my five… you sure you want to do this you slut!" Misty shouted.

"Bitch! I can beat you with just ONE monster! After watching how much you sucked when you had that water duel against Mako!"

"THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO! IM A MUCH BETTER TRAINER THAN I WAS BEFORE! GO STARYU AND STARMIE! USE YOUR SPINNING TACKLE ATTACK!"

"GO HARPIE'S PET DRAGON! BLOCK THAT ATTACK!"

Harpie's Pet Dragon stood firm as the two starfish pokemon connected with the large dragon, but only to be sent flying backwards and to the ground.

"What! Why didn't that work?" Misty said confused.

"If you really DID do research on our show, you would have known that Harpie's Pet Dragon gets a huge power up when it's on the same field as it's masters. And the more Harpies means the stronger the power up!" Mai explained.

Misty growled.

"NOW HARPIE'S PET DRAGON! USE YOUR FLAME ATTACK!"

Harpie's Pet Dragon shot out a stream of fire, toasting Staryu and Starmie! "Oh no! Staryu! Starmie! RETURN!"

The two Pokemon returned safely to their pokeballs through a red beam. "Hey Misty! You obviously aren't ready for this, so why not let BIG DADDY take over!" Ash shouted from behind Misty. She stuck her middle finger up at Ash as she called her next command. "GO POLIWHIRL!"

"This is SOOO BORING!" Mai shouted. "Go, Harpie Lady!" Mai Yawned, then pulled up an chair and sat down.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING!" Misty shouted, pissed off.

"About to kick your scrawny ass, that's what I'm doing." Mai left, then came back with a foot stool and kicked her boots off. "Now I activate Harpie Phoenix Formation! ATTACK!"

Suddenly, the one Harpie Lady turned into seven as they each jumped into the air, then lined up into the form of a Phoenix, then dove down at the unsuspecting Poliwhirl.

"POLIWHIRL! USE DEFENSE CURL!"

Poliwhirl curled itself up into a ball, but it wasn't enough. The Harpies came down hard, resulting in a massive explosion that sent Poliwhirl flying. Marik whistled. "You know he's done!"

"POLIWHIRL! RETURN!"

The Pokemon was recalled right as it was about to hit the ground. "It's ok, Poliwhirl… you tried your best…"

"Psh! That overgrown pillow didn't even get the chance to attack because I kicked it's ass so fast! Now since out that stupid looking duck so we can get this overwith!" Mai shouted.

Misty growled again, then turned to Psyduck, who was playing around with some Duel Monster cards. Misty snatched the cards out of Psyduck's little hands, then kicked him into the "ring" in front of the Harpie Lady army.

"Ok… time to end this… Harpie Lady, use your scratch attack and kill that goofy lookin' thing."

Psyduck looked up to see that he was surrounded by Harpies. Psyduck cocked it's head, then held up a Peace sign.

"Psy yi yi!"

Suddenly, a flurry or scratches came as Psyduck ran around yelping his headache was obviously getting worse with each strike. "That's it Mai… keep it up..." Misty said, beggingly.

"Ok Harpies! That's enough playing. FINISH IT!" Mai ordered. The Harpies jumped up into the hair and prepared to deliver a fierce jump kick, but was stopped in mid air.

Mai jumped up from her seat. "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?"

Misty shook her finger at Mai. "It's one of Psyduck's hidden attacks! It's called Disable!"

Kaiba turned to Yami. "She's fucked, isn't she?"

Yami looked back at Kaiba. "Looks that way."

"NOW PSYDUCK! USE PSYCHIC ATTACK!" Misty ordered.

Psyduck's eye's shot open as they turned dark blue, then a colorful energy field surrounded Mai's Harpie Lady army, then there was a bright flash. Yami, Marik, and Kaiba all yelled as they covered their eyes. When Yami opened his eye a little to see what was going on, he was hit by Mai's body due to the impact of Psyduck's Psychic attack. Both duelists flew across the factory and hit off of a machine.

"Damn, that hurt…" Yami said. Mai struggled to get to her feet. "Fuck that duck…" Mai muttered as she tried to walk. "Mai, your weak… let me take over." Yami pleaded.

"No… I can… beat… that… bitch…" Mai collapsed.

"I told that skank I was going to put her in her place! GOOD JOB PSYDUCK!" Misty said.

"Good work Misty! That'll teach those cocky bastards not to underestimate us!" Ash shouted. "Now finish those fuckers off!" Gary said.

"Gladly! Psyduck! Use Psychic one more time on that Dragon!" Misty ordered. Unfortunately for Misty, Psyduck's headache went away. Psyduck looked back at Misty as if it's trainer was crazy.

"Hey Misty… I think Psyduck's headache is gone." Brock said. "Don't worry! I got a plan!" Misty said with a huge smile on her face. She took a crow bar off one of the wooden boxes located in the factory, then ran towards her pokemon and continuously whacked it in the head. "COME ON! GET A HEADACHE! GET A HEADACHE!" She chased Psyduck around, hitting it in the head with the crow bar. Psyduck hollered as he ran around the factory.

Kaiba couldn't take this anymore. "BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON! USE WHITE LIGHTNING ON THOSE IDIOTS!"

One of Kaiba's Blue Eyes took flight, then shot a huge wave of electricity towards Misty and Psyduck. The attack sent both Trainer and Pokemon flying, both landing on Ash.

"AAHHH! MY NUTS! GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY NUTS, MISTY!" Ash shouted. Misty had the anime swirls in her eyes. "D-d-did anyone get the license plate number on that truck…?"

Brock stepped forward. "Who do you think you are, attacking a girl like that." Kaiba stepped up to meet his opponent. "Girl? The way she ran around, I thought she was a fuckin' Looney Tune." Brock shook his head. "You'll pay for what you did to my friends." Kaiba had a confused look on his face as he stared at Brock.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" Brock said.

"Hey… are those your eyes, or are they mail slots?" Kaiba asked.

"Good one… coming from someone who looks like they just came back from a Gay Pride March." Brock said.

Yami covered his mouth to keep from laughing. _"Gay Pride March… gotta remember that one!"_

Brock got ready to send out his Pokemon. "Lets get this party started!"

Kaiba did the same. "This party will be over before its even started!"

**Location : Card Vault**

Tracey, May, and Max finally arrived at the Card Vault. The Card Vault was a huge safe that had steel that couldn't be penetrated by anything… not even an explosion from an atomic bomb could crack this safe. Pegasus spared no expenses in protecting his life work.

"Wow… this thing is HUGE!" Tracey said.

"How are we ever going to get inside?" May asked.

"Simple… we do a little safe cracking!" Max said.

Tracey looked down at Max. "Um… how? This steel looks pretty durable."

Max pulled out a briefcase, then opened it. He pulled out a cup and put it up to the safe. "OK you guys, start messing with the dials. I'll tell you when you've hit the right numbers."

"FREEZE BITCHES!"

Tracey, May, and Max turned around to see Joey, Rex, and Mako, along with Rocket Warrior and Megazowler.

"Make one move and we'll send you all on a one-way trip to Hell!" Joey said.

"Aah! How did you idiots get here so fast!" Tracey shouted. Mako shook his head. "You know, you Pokemon Trainers aren't very bright, are you?"

"Whats that susposed to mean!" Max yelled angrily.

"The next time you wanna throw us off a trail, you might wanna take down all the CAMERAS that follow you're every move!" Rex said as he pointed up at one of the survilence cameras.

Tracey, May, and Max looked up, then Tracey and May gave Max an annoyed look. 

"They wont be smart enough to figure out how to use the survilence cameras!" May yelled imitating Max. "Well how was I supsosed to know…"

"ANYWAYS, how about stepping away from the safe before we open up a can of whoop ass on you pansies." Joey said. Tracey threw out his Pokeballs. "GO MARILL! GO VENONAT! GO SCYTHER!" May threw out her Pokemon too. "GO TORCHIC! GO BEAUTIFLY! GO SKITTY!"

"MEGAZOWLER! USE YOUR BUM RUSH!"

The large orange triceratops charged at the Pokemon. The Pokemon and the Trainers dashed out of the way as Megazowler rammed the door!

"OUCH! FUCK THAT SHIT HURT! WHY THE HELL DID THAT HURT ME!" Rex shouted.

"Must be a Shadow Game." Joey said. "I ACTIVATE THE MAGIC CARD SCAPEGOAT! THEN I SUMMON PANTHER WARRIOR!" four multicolored sheep like animals appeared, as well as the Panther Warrior.

"Mako… aren't you gonna summon a monster?" Joey asked. "All in due time my friend." Mako responded with his arms folded.

"Marill! Use your Water Gun! Venonat, use Psybeam! Scyther! Use Slash attack!" Tracey ordered. Marill and Venonat jumped up and used their attacks, which headed right at the Duelists.

Mako's jaw dropped. "OK, THAT TIME IS NOW! I SUMMON JELLYFISH IN DEFENSE MODE!"

A large Jellyfish appeared in front of the Duelists and absorbed the attacks. A large green mantis with sword like arms leaped over the Jellyfish and lunged at the Duelists.

"OH THE DAMN YOU WILL! I SACRIFICE A SCAPEGOAT SO PANTHER WARRIOR CAN ATTACK!" Joey shouted.

Panther Warrior jumped forward and blocked the Slash from Scyther, then pushed the giant bug down. Panther Warrior brought down his large sword and sliced Scyther in half.

"OH MY GOD! MY STRONGEST POKEMON!" Tracey cried with tears in his eyes.

"Dude, get over it. That thing looked old. It was gonna kick the bucket sooner or later." Joey said in a fake, consoling voice.

"YOU MURDERERS! YOU ARENT KILLING MY POKEMON! EVERYONE! RETURN!" May said as she recalled all her Pokemon.

"The fuck are you getting mad at us for?" Rex shouted. "You started this shit, so now your losing and you wanna cry and bitch now!"

"Look, theres no way we can beat these guys! We'd better go tell Ash right away!" Max whispered. "Fine… whatever!" Tracey sobbed. May broke out into a sprint down the hall, followed by Max, who was dragging a still crying Tracey.

"What the fuck is up with these pussies! Why do they keep running?" Joey yelled.

"Because their weak! Lets get them so we can get the fuck out of here!" Rex said. Mako turned to them. "We cant leave this thing just lying here… I suggest we eat it!"

"Are you fuckin crazy! Hell no!" Rex shouted. "Hey… bugs do have a bunch of nutrients I hear." Joey said. Mako, not waisting any time, began picking off pieces of Scyther and stuffing them in his mouth. "MMMmmmm! MMMMmmmm! TASTES LIKE CHICKEN!" he said with green globs spraying out of his mouth.

"… I'm gonna fuckin puke…" Rex said.

"HEY HE'S RIGHT!" Joey said with a mouthful of Scyther.

"Oh well… Hakuna Matata, right?" Rex sighed. He grabbed a handful of the backside and began chomping. "HOLY SHIT THAT'S GOOD! I DIDN'T KNOW POKEMON WERE SO FUCKIN TASTY!" Rex shouted. And so, the three of them began to take off after Tracey, May, and Max, with a handful of Scyther.

**Location : Industrial Illusions Card Factory : 9:12pm**

Duel Monster after Pokemon Monster fell as Kaiba and Brock were engaged in a heated battle. It finally came down to their strongest monsters… Brock's Onix and Kaiba's Blue Eyes White Dragon. Onix swung his large tail, but Blue Eyes flew out of the way. Blue Eyes fired it's famous White Lighting attack, but Onix's rock like skin prevented it from being affected from it.

"Dammit! No matter what I do I cant hurt that stupid ass thing!" shouted a frusterated Kaiba.

"Why don't you just let a REAL Duelist handle this fight." Yami Yugi taunted. Kaiba turned to him, pissed as usual. "SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I CAVE YOUR FUCKIN BALLS IN!"

"ONIX, RETURN!"

Kaiba turned to Brock. "What do you think your doing. Were in the middle of a fight!"

"I can see that."

"NO YOU BASTARD! I MEAN A MONSTER FIGHT!"

"Theres no point. You know damn well that dragon wont hurt my Onix. I win."

"BITCH!"

"He's got a point Kaiba." Yami said.

"YUGI NO ONE FUCKIN ASKED YOU!"

Suddenly, Tracey, May, and Max joined the other trainers. Ash looked at Tracey, then at May and Max. "Why the fuck is he crying now… did you guys tell him Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood was a shitty movie again?"

"No! those stupid Duelists cut his Scyther in half!" May cried.

"WHAT?" Ash shouted.

Yami, Mai, and Marik began to laugh like crazy. Kaiba held his mouth to hold back his laughter.

"WHAT THE HELL KIND OF PEOPLE ARE YOU!" Gary shouted.

"Hey, you fucked with us first." Yami shouted.

"If you cant hang with the big dogs, don't even fuckin try running with the pack!" Kaiba said.

"Whats next, are you guys gonna eat our Pokemon next!" Misty shouted.

At that moment, Joey, Rex, and Mako came back to the factory, with armfuls full of the diced up Scyther. "Hey Yuge! Mai! You guys should try this shit! It looks nasty, but its fuckin grub!" Joey shouted. The Pokemon Trainers gasped in horror, while the Duelists laughed even harder.

"You guys think were playing, but were being totally honest! This shit is the bomb!" Rex said.

Gary stepped forward. "You guys think your SOO funny, don't you?" He looked at Ash, who nodded at him. "We WERE going to save this from when we destroyed this factory, but you bastard ass Duelists just keep pushing out buttons!"

"Wait, wait, wait" Mai said between laughing. "You guys started this… so why are you so mad!"

"GO ARTICUNO! ZAPDOS! MOLTRES!"

Gary unleashed the Three Legendary Pokemon, who stood down the Duelists. The laughter soon died down as each of them stared into the face of a terror as bad as the Egyptian god Cards!

"Let's see how you assholes deal with that!" Ash shouted.

"And now that most of your good cards are in the card graveyard, there's no way you'll be able to save yourselves!" Max shouted.

The Duelists all got into their fighting stances. "OK… anyone got any Ideas…?" Yami Yugi asked.

"Yeah, I got one." Mako said. "Pray for a miracle."

"Fuck! I should have known they would do some bullshit like this!" Mai shouted.

Rex stepped forward with a grin on his face. "Man, this is NOTHING! You saw how weak those bastards were! These damn Pokemon are no different from all the other ones! We'll kick their asses, then eat them!"

"Raptor! DO NOT underestimate those things!" Kaiba shouted.

Rex, not paying any attention to Kaiba, drew a card. "GO SERPENT NIGHT DRAGON! ATTACK WITH NIGHTMARE SONIC BLAST!

A large, blue like serpent appeared, and fired black waves of energy at the Legendary Pokemon. All three attacked with a delta blast, which cancelled out the serpent's attack, and connected with the duel monster, destroying it, and sending Rex flying some feet back.

"Idiot…" Kaiba muttered.

Yami stepped forward. "We have GOT to fight these things! Something's gotta work, so hit it with everything you've got!"

"RIGHT ON!" The Duelists, sans Kaiba, shouted.

Every one played monster after monster, but to no avail. The Legendary Pokemon destroyed each one as soon as they were played. Even Joey's Red Eyes Black Dragon and Mako's Fortress Whale fell to these mighty beasts.

"IVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT!" Kaiba shouted. "GO BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON!"

Kaiba played Polymerization, fusing his dragons together. The Ultimate Dragon fired a large photon wave, but it wasn't enough. The Legendary Pokemon combined their attacks once again and cancelled it out.

"Damn… looks like this is it." Marik said.

"Marik! Remember in the first Immunity Challenge you were going to use the Winged Dragon of Ra? Where is that bitch?" Mai asked.

"It was one of those fakes that me and my rare hunters made… it's not going to work in a shadow game…" Marik said.

"Then… its over… those Pokemon bitches beat us." Joey said.

The three birds prepared for a devastating attack. The Duelists could feel the power as it was about to fire off, ending their dueling careers. Just then, Yami, Joey, and Kaiba's Duel Disks began to shine. They each pulled out a card that was mysteriously placed in their decks.

"Hey… I've seen this shit before!" Rex shouted.

"Is that what I think it is!" Mai asked happily.

Yami, Joey, and Kaiba stepped forward.

"HURRY! THEY'RE ABOUT TO FIRE THEIR ATTACKS!" Mako shouted.

"EYE OF TIMAEUS!" Yami Yugi shouted.

"CLAW OF HERMOS!" Joey shouted.

"FANG OF CRITIAS!" Kaiba shouted.

Three Legendary Dragons… the same ones that saved the world against the evil madman Dartz, appeared before the Legendary Pokemon. The Dragons charged up for a devastating attack of their own.

"We might wanna take cover. Shit's about to hit the fan!" Rex said to the others. Marik, Mai, Rex, and Mako ran behind a large machine.

"HIT THE DIRT!" Yami Yugi shouted. Yami, Joey, and Kaiba dove on the ground and covered their heads.

This was it! Articuno, Moltres, and Zapdos fired their attacks! Timaeus, Hermos, and Critias fired their attacks!

**Location : Kaiba Corp. Helicopter : 9: 49pm**

Jeff, the pilot, and the camera crew sat watching "It's a Wonderful Life" on the TV inside the Helicopter.

"What the hell is taking them so long? It's almost Christmas, and I need to get home to my wife and kids!" one of the cameramen complained.

Jeff turned to the Cameraman. "Don't worry… I'm sure Yugi and the others are finishing up right—"

**KABOOM!**

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!" Jeff shouted

They all looked outside the window to see half of Industrial Illusions blown up, with smoke smultering from the once thriving factory. Jeff turned to the Pilot.

"Take us over there! Hurry!"

"Roger!"

A few minutes later, the helicopter was in the air and headed straight for Industrial Illusions.

**What a battle! Who won? The Legendary Dragons or the Legendary Pokemon! And what happened to the Pokemon Trainers? Find out next time on the exciting conclusion of Survivor: Duelist Style: The Decisive Christmas Battle!**

**Ok, everybody! Next Chapter, We're going back to the normal Survivor thing! Immunity Challenge and everything! Count on it! But til then, please R&R**


	11. Return to Destiny Island

Ok guys, I realize that the last chapter was kinda boring… and I deeply apologize for that. Now this chapter, It's back to Survivor! I hope this makes up for everything! Here's Chapter 11!

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

The Dust cleared… debris still fell from the walls. Rex, Mai, Marik and Mako came out from their hiding spots. Mai punched Rex in the back of the head.

"OUCH! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR!" Rex shouted as he held his head.

"IT WAS FOR GRABBING MY BOOBS DURING THAT EXPLOSION!" Mai shot back.

"HEY! YOU LOOKED SCARED, SO I WAS TRYING TO CONSUL YOU!"

Mai punched Rex again. This time in the face. "That's for fuckin' lying about it!" Then she delivered a spinning heel kick to Marik, which caught him in the face as well. "AND THAT'S FOR GRABBING MY ASS DURING THAT EXPLOSION! YOU STUPID FUCKING PERVERTS!" Marik went down hard, holding his face all the while.

Mako walked forward. "Yugi! Joey! Kaiba! Are you alright!"

The three Duelists got off the ground. "We… we won…" Yami muttered. They each looked at their cards as Timaeus, Hermos, and Critias returned to card from.

"YEEEAAHH! STUPID AS POKEMON AINT GOT SHIT ON YU-GI-OH!" Joey cheered. "I guess this wasn't a total loss." Kaiba said. "We completely fucked this place up!"

"Take that, Pegasus! You shouldn't be so damn gay!" Rex shouted.

The Kaiba Corp. helicopter landed as Jeff ran inside and looked around the demolished factory. "Why doesn't this surprise me…?" The Duelists smiled at Jeff. "What were those three big ass birds we saw hauling ass out of here?" Jeff asked.

"WHAT? YOU MEAN THOSE BITCHES RAN AWAY!" Kaiba yelled.

"Its alright. They know they're no match for us." Yami Yugi said.

The Industrial Illusions workers, as well as Kemo and Croquet, came out to thank the Duelists. "Thank you SO much for saving us!" said a female worker.

"Unfortunatly, we've got some bad news." Croquet said. "What now.." Kaiba said.

"Those terrorists somehow hacked into the Card Vault and destroyed every last card!" Kemo said in a panic.

"WHAT?" The Duelists shouted. Kemo and Croquet lead them to the Card Vault. The Huge door was, in fact, open, and all that remained was a large pile of ashes.

"…aint that a bitch…" Rex said. Joey punched the nearby walk… his fist went right through it due to the explosion. "FUCK! THOSE BASTARDS WON AFTER ALL!"

"Duel Monsters is finished…" Mai said sadly

"No… no its not!" Yami Yugi said.

"Forget it, Yugi. If there's no Duel Monster Cards under the kid's Christmas Tree, they wont wanna play anymore" Marik said.

"That wont happen! We'll just have to make new cards!" Yami said, trying to lighten the mood.

"You Jackass! Do you have any IDEA what your daying?" Kaiba roared. "That's damn there over a million cards… in two hours!"

"And all of our delivery truck drivers have gone home for the holidays… It's hopeless." Croquet said sadly.

"Unless… you have a plan, Yuge?" Joey said.

"I do! Everyone! Meet me in the card factory!"

Five minutes later, everyone was in the card factory, wondering what Yugi was planning. Yami returned, with a Santa costume and a sleigh that was found in the storage room.

"Ok, here's my idea… you workers make as many cards as you can before 12am… then Kaiba will dress up as Santa Claus and deliver all the cards using this sick ass jet powered sleigh I found in the storage room… I put the reindeer on the front for shits and giggles!"

"HOLD ON!" Kaiba shouted. "WHO THE HELL SAID KAIBA WOULD DO THIS STUPID ASS TASK!"

"Because YOURE the tallest one here… the Santa suit will only fit you!" Yami said, trying not to laugh.

"YOU IGNORANT SLUT! YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY? I SURE AS FUCK AREN'T DOING THIS! YOU BETTER GET THAT FISHERMAN OVER THERE TO DO IT! HE'S DAMN THERE BIGGER THAN ME!"

Mako walked up to Kaiba and put his hand on his shoulder. "I'd love to Kaiba… but the last time I checked… this place was called KAIBA Corporation… not Mako Corp. This is YOUR ass riding on the line… not mine."

Kaiba snatched the suit from Yugi and started walking to the back, cussing like a madman.

Yugi turned to the others. "He's gonna do it!" He then turned to the Industrial Illusions workers. It's all up to you guys… we did our part, and now its YOUR turn to save Christmas!"

"We'll do our best! RIGHT EVERYBODY?" said one of the workers. The workers all cheered and immediately got to work on crafting new Duel Monsters cards.

**(SONG TIME!)**

**(Ok guys, Do you watch Futurama? If so, have you seen the episode, "A Tale of Two Santas"? If so, you want to sing this song to the tune of the Neptunian Elves' work song. If not… try your best to improvise, ok?**

**Workers**: _We are free and fairly sober,  
with so many cards to build.  
The machines are kind of tricky  
prob'ly someone will be killed.  
But we gladly work for nothing..._

**Rex**: _Which is good, because we don't intend to pay…_

**Workers**: _The drones are back to work today! HOORAY!_

We have just a couple hours  
to make several billion cards,  
and the labor isn't easy...

**Mai**: _Then you'll all work extra hard!  
You can make the job go quicker if you turn up the controls to super-speed!_

**(Music and singing speeds up!)**

**Workers**: _It's back to work on Christmas Eve! Hooray..._

**Yami Yugi**: _And 'though your old, and shaken, and musty,  
your pride will mask the pain._

**Joey**: _Let my happy smile warm your heart_!

**Random Worker**: **(Walks up to Joey, with a Duel Disk mysteriously sticking out of his head) **_There's a Duel Disk lodged in my brain!_

**Workers**: _We are getting awfully tired  
and we can't work any faster  
and we're very, very sorry!_

**Kaiba**: _Why, you selfish little bastards!  
Do you want the world to know that Kaiba's just a crummy empty-headed jerk!_   
**(Kaiba kicks two of the worker men in their "jewels" and starts slapping random workers upside their heads as they all scatter back to work)**

_Then shut your traps and get back to work!_

**Workers**: _Now it's very nearly Christmas and we've done the best we could_

**Mako**: _All these cards are poorly painted..._

**Joey**:_ And they're made from inferior wood. _

**Kaiba**:_ I should give you all a beating, but I really have to fly..._   
**(Kaiba presses a button on the jet powered sleigh and it takes off flying into the air, then out of sight.)**

**Marik **: _If I wasn't freezing my balls off, I'd harpoon you in the eye!_

**Workers**: _Now it's back into our tenements to drown ourselves in rye!_

**Yami Yugi**: _You did the best you could, I guess that some of these Kuriboh are okay!_

**Workers**: Hooray! We're adequate!

**Duelists and the Workers**: _Yu-Gi-Oh! have rescued Christmas day! HOORAY!_

**(End of Song)**

And so, Kaiba flew through the night, dropping off cards on Every doorstep… how he knew which house had kids that played Duel Monsters is beyond me. But Kaiba Claus flew from Asia to Africa, Australia to Newark, then complained,

"How's Santa stay fat, man? This shit is hard work!"

Kaiba eventually flew to Kanto. He thought to himself, _"That was one hell of a Christmas they put us through… Maybe I should give them something in return!" _He suddenly flipped a U-turn, then came back a few minutes later with a large package, then dropped it in the middle of Pallet Town. And they heard him exclaim as he put on a sneer,

"Pull this shit again and I'll kill you next year!"

Then, Kaiba stepped on the gas and hauled ass out of site as a huge explosion went off behind him.

His cell phone rang a couple minutes later. "Kaiba." He answered.

"Hows the delivery going, Kaiba?" Yami Yugi asked on the other line.

"A fuckin cakewalk. I left a little present to those Pokemon bastards and… WHAT A DAMN SECOND! HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY CELL PHONE NUMBER!"

"Mokuba."

"I am going to strangle that little… ANYWAYS, its going fine. Now get off the damn phone so I can finish!"

"Ok, cool. Hey, were all going back to Destiny Island, so meet us there."

"Fine. Oh, and Yugi?"

"Kaiba?"

"Don't EVER fuckin call my cell phone again!"

"Whatever bitch. Bye."

**CLICK!**

Kaiba closed his flip phone and went back to his job. A few hours later, Kaiba had finished his world tour, and headed back to Destiny Island. He crashed his sleigh in front of the snowy field facing the Pootiezonga Mansion, then crashed out on his bed.

What a night for the Duelists, but it was all over.

**Immunity Challenge! WOOO! BET U MISSED THOSE!**

**Location : Middle of the Island : 9:45am**

Everyone faced Jeff as he got ready to explain the next Immunity Challenge. 

"First of all, I just want to say, Merry Christmas everyone!" Jeff said.

"Merry Christmas Jeff!" The Duelists said back.

"Hey, is Bernadette here?" Rex asked.

"No, she went home for the holidays."

"Hallelujah Day!" Rex said with tears in his eyes from happiness.

"Ok, now today's Immunity Challenge, seeing as how its Christmas, is… Wait, were's Seto?"

"He must still be asleep." Mai said.

"Hang on, I'll get him." Said Yami as he walked back towards the Pootiezonga Mansion.

"No, Yugi, no. Come back here!" Jeff pleaded.

"Don't worry. I'm just gonna bring Kaiba here." Yami said as he kept walking.

"…THAT'S what im afraid of…"

Yami Yugi walked all the way back to the Pootiezonga Mansion and into Kaiba's room as he saw the young CEO exhausted from his midnight ride the night before. Yami leaned in towards Kaiba's ear.

"Kaiba…" Yami whispered in a really low voice. "Oh Kaiba…Wake up Seto…"

Still, Kaiba continued to snore. He wasn't really in the blankets. He was laid out wearing a wife beater and his boxers. Yugi walked into the bathroom, and filled up a large bucket full of cold water, then walked back to Kaiba with a HUGE grin on his face, trying his hardest not to laugh.

"Kaiba…" His whispered one last time.

Finally, he dumped the large bucket full of ice cold water on Kaiba and shouted, "RISE AND SHINE! IMMUNITY CHALLENGE TIME, BABY! WOOOOOO!"

Kaiba jumped up from his bed and grabbed his covers as he shrieked from the cold water. Yami laughed so hard he almost fell on the floor.

Kaiba looked at Yami and his face turned bright red. He ran to his closet and started pulling out some clothes.

"DAMMIT YOU SON OF A BITCH! IM GONNA KILL YOU THIS TIME! NO LIE! IM GONNA REALLY FUCK YOU UP! HAND ME MY SHIRT!"

Yami, still laughing, reached over and handing Kaiba his shirt. Kaiba put it on, still yelling at Yami.

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU, THEN BURN YOUR CORPSE AND FEED IT TO THE WOLVES! THEN IM GONNA HEX YOUR SOUL STRAIGHT TO HELL! HAND ME MY BOOTS!"

Yami handed Kaiba his boots, still laughing all the while. Then Yami helped Kaiba put on his white rock star like jacket. As soon as that was done, Yam Yugi bolted out of the room, then Kaiba reached under his bed and pulled out a large bat with spikes sticking out of it, then pursued his long time rival.

The two of them ran out towards the snowy field, where the Immunity Challenge is taking place. Yami hid behind Jeff.

"Probst! YOU BETTER DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT ANAL CRUSADER BEFORE I PUT HIM OUT OF HIS MISERY!" Kaiba yelled.

"Calm down Kaiba… u might cause an avalanche on Mt. Four Winds!" Yami Yugi said from behind Jeff.

"Ok, now that we're all here, today's Immunity Challenge is Snow Forts! Its pretty much a snowball fight! Last person standing wins Immunity! But, this wouldn't be Survivor: Duelist Style of we didn't Jazz it up a bit, so the snowballs you will be using have a special chip inside… when your hit, you'll get an electric shock… like from Pikachu! Hahaha!"

The Duelists all groaned as they pelted Jeff with snowballs.

"That's not funny, Probst!" Mai yelled.

"Yeah! DO NOT mention ANYTHING that has to do with Pokemon around us!" Marik yelled.

Jeff stepped back. "Right, right… sorry… anyways, Survivor's ready?"

The Duelists each picked up a bag of special snowballs and zeroed in on their targets. Guess who Kaiba had in his sights.

"GO!"

And with that, the snowballs flew! Everyone was diving and tossing all over the place. It looked like a friendly snowball war, until Yami Yugi somehow hit Kaiba in his "no-no's". Kaiba was shocked, then frozen. "Y-Y-Yugi… I-I-I'm g-g-gonna…"

**KAIBA IS OUT!**

Mako grabbed a snowball, then had a serious grin on his face. "Time to go… Jungle Style! Ay Yi Yi Yi Yi!"

Suddenly, Mako was hit and zapped by a barrage of snowballs! "Don't think so, squid for brains!" Rex shouted. Mako was paralyzed.

**MAKO IS OUT!**

Snowball after snowball flew as Mai, then Marik, til it was a triangular stare down between Yami Yugi, Joey, and Rex. Joey began to sweat… then his short temper got the best of him.

"TAKE THIS, DINO-BOY!" Joey jumped up, then switched directions and threw a snowball, hitting Yami Yugi right in the face!

"Joey, you clever son of a b-b-bit.." Yami tried to say through his paralysis.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS, WHEELER!" Rex said as he threw a snowball right at Joey's head. The screen suddenly went into bullet time as Joey leaned back slowly **(Author's Note: Remember The Matrix? THAT'S what I'm talking about when I mean Bullet Time for those of you who don't know.) **and three snowballs flew directly past him. Then he pulled back and it went into Bullet Time again as he jumped up and stayed in the air for like 5 seconds, then hit Rex with two snowballs, paralyzing him!

"SON OF A MOTHERLESS FUCK!" Rex shouted.

Jeff blew his whistle.

"**TWEEET!"**

"Rex is out! Joey is the winner of the Immunity Challenege!" Joey started to do a little victory dance. "I'M BAD! YOU KNOW IT! I'M BAD! I SHOW IT! WHO'S YOUR DADDY! WHO'S YOUR DADDY! JOEY! THAT'S WHO!"

"I—am—going—to—kick—your—ass!" Kaiba muttered.

"Don't worry survivors. Your paralysis will wear off in 30 minutes. Til then, enjoy your Christmas. Tomorrow we'll have the Tribal Meeting!" Jeff said as he ran back to the CBS Campsite. "Gotta get home… my wife is going to kill me!"

**Location : Pootiezonga Mansion : 10:36am**

The Duelists were all back inside as they each opened a present from the CBS executives. Joey got a new Duel Disk. Rex got a stuffed Megazowler doll. Marik got a chess set. Mai got the make up she wanted so badly. Mako got a fishing rod. Kaiba and Yugi had yet to open their presents from CBS… because they each got one for the other. Kaiba unwrapped his gift, staring at Yugi the whole time. As he opened the box, a raunchy smell filled the room, nearly wilting the tree and causing everyone to cover their noses.

"DAMN! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!" Mai shouted.

"It smells like a fuckin' corpse!" Marik said.

Kaiba pulled out a horse's head, with blood dripping from the bottom. "Thanks a lot you stupid motherfucker." Kaiba said.

"Hey, I was at the meat market the other day, and that head just SCREAMED out Kaiba!" Yami said with a big smile on his face.

"Whatever. Open my gift now, fucker."

Yami began to open the package. Suddenly, the Millennium Puzzle began to flash. Yami quickly ran to the nearest window, opened it, and chucked the package as high as he could into the air. The package exploded, and a red, lava like substance fell to the snow covered ground as it melted its way to the bottom. Yami Yugi shot an angered look at Kaiba.

"WAS THAT FUCKIN' NAPALM?"

Kaiba smiled. "It sure was!"

"YOU TRIED TO KILL ME WITH NAPALM! AWWWW, COME HERE YOU BIG LUG!"

Yami and Kaiba began to hug. "Merry Christmas Jackass!" Kaiba said

"Merry Christmas, tater nuts!" Yami replied.

Joey jumped on the couch. "Come on guys! Lets watch the rest of Lil Jon Saves Christmas! I taped the rest of it before we left the other day!"

Everyone gathered around the TV. It was a Christmas to remember!

**Location : Mai's bedroom… Pootiezonga Mansion : 1:23am**

Two unknown figures snuck into Mai's bedroom. A flashlight came on as the two went straight for Mai's underwear drawer.

"So… what did you say this was called again?" Marik asked.

"A Panty Raid." Rex replied.

"Sweet… hey, are you sure Mai's gone?"

"Yeah! I saw her leave when she went walking outside with Wheeler. That dopey bastard might get lucky, but we get to go through Mai's panties!"

"SCORE!"

"SSHH! She may be gone, but we don't want no one to know were in here!"

"Oh, right…"

Marik held up the flashlight as he and Rex rummaged through Mai's thongs. Rex grabbed a pair and sniffed them deeply. "OOOOOOOHHHH SHIT!"

"Whats wrong, Rex?"

"Mai must have bought her after shave cream from that store Bed, Bath, and Beyond! Damn that smells good…"

"Her shaving cream… u mean when she shaves her cha-cha?"

"Exactly!"

Marik took out a pair and sniffed them… but threw them back, gagging. "GOD DAMN! I DON'T THINK SHE WASHED DOWN THERE AFTER SHE PUT THIS PAIR ON! SMELL THIS SHIT"

Rex took the panties and threw them over his shoulder. "Fuck no! I don't want that raunchy shit in my nose!"

Suddenly, the lights flipped on, and Mai stood there, VERY VERY angry, in her night gown, with the panties on her head that Rex had tossed backwards. Rex and Marik slowly turned around with the deer in the headlights look on their faces.

"Hi… Mai.. we were… um… putting away your laundry! Right Marik?" Rex said nervously.

Marik was still frozen from shock.

Mai took the panties off of her head, then pulled out her famous twin desert eagle pistols.

"…IM ABOUT TO GET JOLLY ON YOUR NAUGHTY ASSES!"

The cameras zoom in on the Pootiezonga Mansion as Rex and Marik busts the door down and hauls ass outside, with Mai in hot pursuit, firing her guns all the while!

**Location : Tribal Council : December 26th : 10:57pm**

The Pootiezongas stood before Jeff Probst at the latest Tribal Council. Jeff looked at Rex and Marik, who was bandaged in many places due to Mai's random firing.

"…I wont even ask…" Jeff said. "Ok everyone, do you all feel rested up from your adventure at Industrial Illusions?"

"Yep. Fit as a fiddle!" Mako said.

"And how was your Christmas?" Jeff asked.

"I was great after we got that damn horse head smell out of the fuckin living room." Kaiba said.

"Alright then. Let the voting begin. Yugi, do you thing. And remember, since Joey won the Immunity Challenge, he cannot be voted off."

Yami Yugi walked up to the voting box. "Mako… Fit as a fiddle? Sorry, but you've gotta go!"

Mai went next. "Mako, If you think I forgotten about the last Immunity Challenge, your sadly mistaken! Rex and Marik's bitch asses are next!"

Finally, everyone was done voting. Jeff tallied up the votes, then read them off. "Ok, one for Mako, another for Mako… one for Yugi… One for Mako… One for Kaiba… One for Mako… and one for Kaiba… Ok Mako, bring me your torch."

Mako gave Jeff his torch. The Torch was doused and broken in half. "Mako Tsunami, the tribe has spoken. We thank you for surviving this long. As for the rest of you, rest up for the next day!"

Everyone, sans Kaiba, said their goodbyes to Mako, then went back to the mansion.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Mako Tsunami**

"I was SO close to winning that cash and the rare cards… I would have been like Pegasus… only straight. OH WELL! THERE WILL BE OTHER SURVIVORS! UNTIL THEN… MY FRUIT PUNCH AWAITS!"

Mako jumped up from his seat in front of the camera, then took off running towards the ocean and swam out of sit. Joey appeared in the camera as he watched Mako swim away. "Damn, I feel bad for him getting voted off… anyone who can swim across a fuckin' ocean has GOT to be one hell of a guy… but hey! It leaves room for the TRUE survivor, Joey Wheeler! Ha ha!"

And so, the holidays pass on Destiny Island as another adventure closes. But what's in store for our survivors next episode? Will the Pokemon Trainers exact futher revenge on the Pootiezongas? Probably not…Kaiba blew Kanto to hell! But one thing's for certain… they will find another way to fuck with the Yu-Gi-Oh! cast… we just don't know when. GEEZ I'M SCARED NOW! SOMEONE HOLD ME!

**We are down to 6 Survivors! I honestly cant believe this Fan Fic lasted this long! And I have all of you to thank for that! So thank you SO much from the bottom of my heart! And I apologize one more time if the Pokemon Vs. Yu-Gi-Oh! fight was boring… I kinda rushed through that so I can get us back to the humor. But in the meantime, please R&R… and don't be too harsh with me, ok?**


	12. A Revolving Door of Duelists

Ok guys, I'm having some serious writers block on the next episode, so here's something I put together while I was in my Biology Class while watching some boring ass movie on Chromosomes. It's something I like to call, "The Cartoon Before The Movie". I did this because of writer's block, and I'm not quite ready to end this fan fic yet. So until then, ENJOY!

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do I own Survivor

In Hollywood California, the CBS Executives all sat around a large rectangular table with a bunch of papers and glasses of wine in front of them. At the head of the table sat the CBS Producer and Kazuki Takahashi, the father of Yu-Gi-Oh!

"A toast, Gentlemen…" The Producer said. "To Mr. Takahashi for giving us the gift of Yu-Gi-Oh! and for the success of Survivor! Duelist Style!. Thanks to that show, we are now the most watched network on the air! And that whole incident at Industrial Illusions skyrocketed our ratings!"

"And to think… you all wanted to use stupid ass Pokemon!" Takahashi said.

"Had we of done that… we would have all been in the unemployment line at this very moment… so a toast to…"

As everyone rised up their wine glasses, a distress call came on the telecom.

"Mr. Haywood! Mr. Haywood!"

The Producer pushed a button next to the telecom. "Yes, what is it Debbie! Were in the middle of a toast!"

"I know, I know, but theres a large man here, and he's… NO DON'T GO IN THERE!" 

Suddenly the line went dead.

"Um… what's going on Mr. Haywood?" Takahashi asked.

Just then, an ax blade came through the large double doors. The blade was pulled out, then forced back in. The Executives all shot worried looks at one another. Finally, the double doors were kicked in as a large man who wore a bandanna with the American flag on it around his head, dark sunglasses, and biker attire stepped into the room. Bandit Keith threw down his ax and walked up to the large table and began pounding on it.

"I WANT SOME FUCKIN ANSWERS! ONE OF YOU PENCIL NECKED GEEKS BETTER START TALKING RIGHT FUCKIN NOW!"

"Keith! Keith, calm down." Takahashi said.

"NO YOU FUCKIN CALM DOWN! I'M GOING TO THE BAR TO GET HAMMERED THE OTHER DAY, AND I JUST SO HAPPEN TO LOOK AT A BILLBOARD THAT SAYS, 'THE GREATEST REALITY SHOW ON TV… SURVIVOR, DUELIST STYLE!' AND THERES A PICTURE OF THOSE STUPID ASS DUELISTS! THAT JUST COMPLETELY FUCKED UP MY ENTIRE NIGHT! WHY THE FUCK WASN'T I CALLED FOR THIS SHOW! IM THE FUCKIN' INTERCONTINNENTAL CHAMPION, DAMMIT!"

The Executives were all too scared to say anything. Mr. Haywood and Mr. Takahashi looked at each other. Keith then jumped on the large table.

"SOMEBODY BETTER START FUCKIN TALKIN OR BANDIT KEITH IS GONNA GET BUCK WILD UP IN THIS BITCH!"

Mr. Haywood tried to reason with the uber-pissed Keith. "Keith, Keith, we tried to call you, but it said your cell phone was disconnected."

"THAT'S SOME HIGH QUALITY, FIRST CLASS, GRADE-A BULLSHIT!" Keith shouted. "CALL MY PHONE! RIGHT NOW! I GUARANTEE YOU IT'LL WORK!"

"Keith, I don't think…"

Keith pulled out a shotgun, then cocked it. "CALL IT OR IM GONNA START PUMPIN' BITCHES FULL OF HOT LEAD!"

"Fine…"

Mr. Haywood walked back to the telecom and entered Bandit Keith's cell phone number, then turned the speaker on. The cell phone could be heard ringing. The ring tone was Beethoven's 9th Symphony. After the third ring, System of a Down's Bounce! Began to play loudly. After like 3 minutes, the sound turned down and Keith's voice could be heard,

"_Hey, this is Bandit Keith. You know what to do."_

The music turned back up and played for another 2 minutes, then another voice came on,

_If you would like to leave a messege, press one or wait for the tone. To send a numeric page, press two now._

"SEE! MY SHIT IS CONNECTED!"

"Um… why didn't you answer?" Takahashi asked.

"Because bitch! I don't get free minutes til after 9pm! And plus I'm roaming right now!" Keith yelled.

"Listen Keith…" The Producer said. "We have something we think you'll like. We're currently working with MTV for another Real World, and we thought having Duelists on there would spice up the ratings, and naturally, we thought to add Bandit Keith to that mix… what do you think?"

Keith got down off the table. "Whoa! Some of those chicks are HOT on that show! Ok, you guys got a deal! Where do I sign!"

"We'll do the contract signing once everyone is here." The Producer assured him. "Alright! Now that's what the fuck I'm talkin' about!" Bandit Keith shouted. He then started to walk out the busted down double doors, then stopped in his tracks.

"If I'm watching TV one day, and I find out that you decided to use something like Yu Yu Hakusho, Digimon, or any gay shit like that, then I will come back here and open up a can of whoop ass on you nerdy bastards. You hear me? Good Day!"

Bandit Keith left the room. All the network executives finally calmed down.

The Producer raised his wine glass. "Now, before we were so rudely interrupted… a toast to…"

"MR. HAYWOOD! MR. HAYWOOD!"

"What now, Debbie!"

"There's another psycho here to see you! Theres a bunch of them and they all look alike and… HEY, YOU CANT JUST GO IN THERE… COME BAC…"

The line suddenly went dead again. Mr. Takahashi shook his head. "Now what…?"

Espa Roba and his three brothers busted in the room.

"IM GOING TO ASK THIS AND IM ONLY ASKING IT ONCE… WHO'S ASS AM I ABOUT TO KICK!" Espa Shouted

"Whats the matter... Mr… uh…"

"ROBA! ESPA ROBA!"

"Right… Mr. Roba… what seems to be troubling you?"

"ME AND MY BROTHERS WERE WATCHING TV THE OTHER DAY, AND NOT ONLY DID WE SEE YOUR SURVIVOR: DUELIST STYLE, BUT MY NAME WAS MENTIONED SO MANY TIMES ITS NOT EVEN FUCKIN FUNNY! AND IVE WRITTEN IT DOWN TOO!"

The executives and the Producer looked at each other. Mr. Takahashi put his hand over his face as he shook his head in disgust. Espa Roba pulled out a small list out of his pocket.

"In one episode, Rex Raptor said something, and Jeff Probst replied, 'Go Blow Espa Roba, Raptor!' And in another episode, that American Idol rip off you did, I heard Yugi or Mako or whoever mention MY name in a song!"

"BIG BROTHER! IM HUNGRY!"

"SHUT UP! IM TRYING TO NEGOTIATE HERE!" Espa shouted at one of his brothers. "Now im not TOO pissed that you didn't call ME to be on this show, but if your going to be mentioning me, I want to see some of that damn money your all swimming in! I've got half the mind to sue your asses, but I have to take care of my brothers here! And quite frankly, I barely have the money to feed them!"

"Ok Mr. Roba… if we give you some money, will you cool off?"

"DAMN STRAIGHT!"

"But Espa… we thought you were gonna…"

"_Shut up or I'll whore you all out to gay men for money again…" _ Espa said quietly.

The Producer tossed a roll of dollar bills to Espa Roba. "Will $200 be enough?"

"TWO HUNDRED? TWO HUNDRED! TWO FUCKING HUNDRED DOLLARS! I GET MADE FUN OF ON A DAILY BASIS AND ALL YOU CAN GIVE ME IS TWO HUNDRED FUCKIN DOLLARS! I'VE SOLD MY BROTHERS FOR MORE THAN THAT SHIT!"

"Fine… $400 AND a coupon for a free small Blizzard at Dairy Queen."

"…sold." Espa said as he took the money and the coupon. He and his brothers left the room. About a minute later, Espa came back and said, "IF I HAVE TO COME BACK DOWN HERE, HEADS WILL ROLL! YOU HEAR ME! HEADS… WILL… ROLL!" Then he left again.

The Producer grabbed his jacket and headed for the door. "Come on… Lets go get lunch before another loser ass Duelist comes barging in here!"

Everyone got their jackets and briefcases full of papers and started heading out the door. A figure appeared in the large window overlooking the office. Ishizu Ishtar watched as all the Executives, Mr. Haywood, and Mr. Takahashi left the room.

Ishizu's Millennium Necklace began to flash. "So… your going to T.G.I.Friday's, huh? I'll see you there!"

The Group proceeded to head outside, but was stopped by a familiar dark group in the lobby of the CBS Building. This group was dressed in rags however, from being out of work for so long. Mr. Takahashi slapped his forehead. "What is this, a class reunion of losers! What the fuck do you Rare Hunters want!"

Rare Hunter, Arkana, Umbra, Lumis, and Strings stood between the network Executives and the door.

"Come on… you guys have got to help us! We've been in shambles ever since Master Marik disowned us!" Arkana pleaded.

"Yeah… give us our own show! PLEASE!" Rare Hunter begged.

Mr. Haywood opened his mouth, but Lumis interrupted him. "I know what your going to say… why should we give you washed up Duelists a show? Well ill tell you why!" Lumis snapped his fingers. The lobby suddenly turned from a nice, air conditioned waiting room to what appeared to be a large stage. (How they did that is beyond us).

Umbra stood on the stage in a Ring Master's suit and top hat. "We'll call it… Circus of the Ghouls!"

Mr. Takahashi slapped his forehead once again. "This CANNOT be happening to me…"

Umbra pointed upwards. "WE HAVE RARE HUNTER… THE DEATH-DEFYING, AMAZING FLYING TRAPEZE ARTIST!"

Rare Hunter began to swing from a trapeze. The second swing came loose from the lack of funds. Lumis pushed a large tank of water on the stage to break the Rare Hunter's fall. Once he hit the pool, the water splashed from the tank and drenched the Network Execs, Mr. Haywood, and Mr. Takahashi!

The Network Execs began to grumble. "MY FUCKIN SUIT! I JUST GOT THIS OUT OF THE CLEANERS!" Mr. Takahashi shouted.

Umbra began to sweat. "Um… well, if that didn't get you, then you'll LOVE the pantomime of Strings!"

Strings came on the stage and began doing the man trapped in the box act, and a few other routines.

The others weren't buying it as most of the Network Execs. have nodded off, while Mr. Haywood and Mr. Takahashi struggled to stay awake.

Umbra ran back on stage and pushed Strings off. "And finally… duel ghoul with a funny bone… the comedy act of the Dueling Comedian… Lumis!"

Lumis came on stage wearing a t-shirt, an open jacket, baggy pants, and some Air Force Ones shoes. He still, however, wore his half of a white mask over his face.

"Yo Yo YO! MAN, WHATS UP WITH YUGI! I HAVENT SEEN HAIR THAT BIG SINCE MARGE SIMPSON… HUH? HUH?"

The Network Group was silent. Crickets were heard chirping in the background.

"Ok OK OK! YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE! Kaiba's mama's so stupid, if brains were dynamite, she wouldn't have enough to blow her nose! Huh! HUH!"

A chuckle was heard in the group, followed by the smacking sound of a head. Mr. Haywood stood up. "You know what guys? Work on your stuff. And don't call us… we'll call you." He turned to his group. "LETS GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!"

Everyone took off running as the Rare Hunters stood there, stunned. "I cant believe that didn't work…" Arkana said. "I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SHOW THEM MY MAGIC ACT!"

Suddenly a young woman walked up to the group.

"Hi! I have a 2:15 interview with CBS for Fear Factor…?"

The Rare Hunters shot each other devious looks…

Outside, The Network Group piled into a large stretch Limo. Mr. Takahashi knocked on the small window that connected to the driver's area.

"Driver… I don't care where you take us, but get us the fuck out of here before more Duelists show up and… OH HELL NO!"

Mr. Takahashi looked at the small plaque that was posted on the dash bored. It read:

"_Your driver is… Ms. Ishizu Ishtar"_

Mr. Haywood and the Network Executives saw the plaque, and fear and terror was seen on their faces.

Ishizu turned around wearing a chauffeur uniform and a little chauffeur hat on her head.

"Welcome to hell on earth…"

The Limo took off down the street and hauled ass a couple blocks until it boarded the L.A. Freeway. Screams could be heard coming from the Limo as it took off to an unknown location. So it seems, looks like Ishizu will be the one to get what she wants.

**And now, we return you to your regularly scheduled Fan Fiction… Next Chapter, were down to Six Duelists… who's gonna get kicked off next? Find out soon! If you like, please R&R this mini-chapter! **


	13. New Years Rockin Eve

So I take It you guys didn't like the whole side story thing. Don't worry. No more of those. And to Ametu's Lover, I don't hate you for that review… TOO MUCH! No, I'm playin. I don't hate you, but here is what you all have been waiting for! Enjoy!

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

Joey Wheeler, Mai Valentine, Rex Raptor, and Marik Ishtar all sat in the living room doing an activity. Joey, Marik, and Rex played Playstation 2, and Mai was reading a glamour magazine. It was one of those boring Sunday afternoons with nothing to do but sit around the house and be lazy (don't you just love those?).

Suddenly, Yami Yugi busts in, surprising everyone.

"Hey guys! I just got a great idea! Um… where's Kaiba?" Yami asked.

"He's in that lab of his planning his next plan to kill you." Mai replied.

"Figures. Oh well. Hey, you guys feel like adding fuel to the fire?" Yami asked.

"Huh?" Joey, Rex, and Marik said.

"You know… add insult to injury!" Yami said excited.

"Yuge." Joey said. "We have NO idea what the FUCK you are talking about."

"I'll explain along the way… now come on… unless you would rather just sit around being bored." Yami said.

"Who says were bored!" Marik said

"Yeah, were having the time of our lives!" Rex said excitedly.

Yami crossed his arms. "Then why the hell are you getting ready to hit yourself in the head with an empty glass bottle of Crush soda?"

Rex looked over his head and noticed he was in fact about to club himself with an empty bottle.

**(Side note: Crush soda is SOOOO good! I had some on my spring break! Best soda in the world!)**

"… Ok, lets go." Rex said, tossing the bottle aside.

Yami and the others left the house, with Yami saying, "… and CBS already approved of this!"

_**Meanwhile on the other side of the world…**_

In an average suburbian American home, A young boy is sitting on the couch watching the end of a tv show. He then calls out to his family.

"HEY! MAMA! PAPA! SIS! ITS COMING ON!"

The sister quickly hung up the phone as she came running down the stairs, followed by the father. The mother came in the room from the kitchen holding a large bowl of popcorn.

"This is it! I cant wait to see what happens today!" The father said excitedly.

"Do you think Kaiba is going to kill Yugi today, dad?" The son asked.

"Probably not…. But its fun to watch!" the father replied.

"Who do you think will get voted off?" The sister asked.

"I hope it's Marik. That guy is weird!" The mom said.

"Not me! Said the sister. I hope its that pervert, Rex Raptor!"

"No way!" the son said. "Who will that fat chick harass if Rex gets voted off!"

"Now now." The dad said. "You shouldn't make fun of people just because they have a few extra pounds. I mean, your mother used to be like that…" The father turned his head.

"_Til she got liposuction…"_

"Ssshhh! Its coming on!" the mother said.

Suddenly, a bunch of Duel Monsters appeared on the TV, followed by Rex Raptor.

**(SONG TIME! WOO!)**

**(Sing this song in the tune of the Pokerap… if you've ever seen that catchy crap.)**

**Rex: **Hey kids! You think you know Yu-Gi-Oh?

**Yami Yugi: **TAKE THE CHALLENGE, TAKE, TAKE THE CHALLENGE!

**Kid Chorus: **_Fairy's Gift, Dark Elf, Hane Hane, Beaver Warrior, Bickuribox, Battle Ox…_

**Joey: **AWESOME!

**Kid Chorus: **_Celtic Guardian, Berfomet, Beta the Magnet Warrior, Curse of Dragon, Axe Raider, Jinzo, Dark Magician, Ryu-Kishin, Rogue Doll…_

**Mai: **Come on now, your doing great! Bring it on down, see how you rate!

**Yami Yugi: **TAKE THE CHALLENGE, TAKE, TAKE THE CHALLENGE!

**Kid Chorus: **_Dark Magician Girl, Shadow Ghoul, Suijin, Silver Fang, Red Eyes Black Dragon, Panther Warrior, Harpie Lady, Zoa, Time Wizard, Feral Imp, Dark Witch, Dragon Piper…_

**Marik: **SING IT BABY!

**Yami Yugi: **TAKE THE CHALLENGE, TAKE, TAKE THE CHALLENGE!

**Announcer: **Yu-Gi-Oh! Weekdays at 4:30, 3:30 central and pacific, on Kids WB!

**6 Duelists…**

**Yugi Muto… Joey Wheeler… Seto Kaiba… Rex Raptor… Mai Valentine… Marik Ishtar…**

**2 Prizes…**

**3 Million Dollars…. Treasure Chest full of rare cards…**

**WHO WILL BE THE WINNER? FIND OUT WHO GET'S THE BOOT TODAY ON…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

**Location : Sauna on old Pootietang Property : 12:37pm**

Rex Raptor sat in the sauna, relaxing. It was New Years Eve, and of course, Rex was uptight.

_"New Years Eve… yet ANOTHER year has gone by and I haven't been a champion since the Regionals… worse of all… I HAVENT GOTTEN LAID YET! Well who cares.. I just wanna relax now… just sit away and watch the day go by…"_

Rex was on the verge of nodding off until his eyes shot open.

"_My dino sense is tingling!" _He thought.

"Hey! Who's out there! I'm trying to relax over here!"

Bernadette came out of the bushes wearing nothing but a beach towel around her. Rex's eyes bulged out of his head.

"What the hell do you want? GO AWAY!" Rex shouted, scared.

"I was hoping we could make some REAL steam, Rexy- baby!" Bernadette said as she eyed Rex's body.

"No… HELL NO! DON'T COME NEAR ME!" Rex said as he moved as far to the back of the sauna as he could.

Bernadette took off the bath towel and began to move toward the sauna. Rex, blinded from the site, began to panic.

"GET AWAY! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING!"

"CATCH ME BABY!"

Bernadette jumped into the sauna. The water, along with Rex, began to flood out of the hole, splashing all over the area. Once Rex hit the ground, he immediately began to run for dear life. He left his clothes on the other side of the sauna. He was so terrified, he didn't notice that he was running through the jungle bare naked. The nude Rex Raptor eventually ran past Joey and Marik, who was taking a walk. Rex turn to them and shouted,

"DON'T GO IN THE SAUNA! THERES' A NAKE FAT BITCH!"

Then turned around and continued running. Joey and Marik, however, were wide-eyed at the site of their naked Tribal Member.

"Hey Marik… remember how I said the scariest thing I ever seen was the time your evil side unleashed the Winged Dragon of Ra on me in the Battle City Finals? Well I'd like to change that to… THAT…" Joey said as he pointed at Rex running naked.

"I'm going to have to say the same… I'll need the jaws of life to get that image out of my head…" Marik said, shaken.

**Location : Middle of the Island : 1:14pm**

Yami Yugi, Joey, Mai, Marik, and Rex were all called to the usual mingling spot. Apparently, Jeff Probst had another big announcement. They all talked amongst themselves, wondering why they were called out this time.

Yami suddenly felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to only get slapped in the face by a giant t-bone steak, by none other than Seto Kaiba. Yami wiped grease and gravy off of his face, angrily.

"DAMMIT KAIBA? WHAT THE FUCK?" he shouted.

Kaiba had the smug grin on his face this time. "I am SOO sorry Yugi… guess I cant control my 'meat'". He put his index and middle fingers on both corners of his mouth and let out a whistle. Kaiba moved out of sight as a lion jumped out of the jungle and began looking hungerly at the Duelists. Each of them froze, but Yami, no knowing what was going on, used his jacket to wipe the meat juice off of his face. The lion caught the scent of the meat on Yami and began to charge at him.

"What the deuce?" Yami said as he looked up. Then he shot a pissed off look at Kaiba. "I'm gonna get you for this!" he said as he turned and started running. The lion chased Yami Yugi around the area as Kaiba laughed his ass off and yelling.

"KILL HIS ASS! DON'T LEAVE A SINGLE STRAND OF THAT BASTARD!"

Yami soon got an idea. He ran back towards the Duelists. Joey, Marik and Rex dove out of the way, but Yami ran right past Mai and grabbed something from her.

"Hey! What the fuck did you just do, you fly-by-nights ass!" Mai shouted as she searched her body. "Hey… DID YOU TAKE MY PERFUME!"

Yami started spraying perfume all over his body, then he turned around. The Lion continued charging, but suddenly froze as a gold aura surrounded it's body and lifted it up into the air. Yami walked up to the lion, with the Millennium Puzzle flashed a dark gold, and began to say something to him in what appeared to be lion language. The Puzzle stopped flashing, and the aura let the lion down and disappeared. The Lion turned to Kaiba and charged at him!

"WHAT THE SHIT! YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!

Kaiba began to run like crazy with the lion hot on his heels. The lion went for a huge chomp, catching the end of Kaiba's jacket, pulling him down.

"EAT HIM! EAT HIM!" Joey shouted.

"Hey Kaiba! I told the lion you have the meat! GIVE HIM THE MEAT, KAIBA!" Yami Yugi shouted.

Kaiba took the t-bone steak and threw it as far as he could into the jungle. The lion let go of his jacket and took off running after the meat. Kaiba got up, dusted himself off, and began to charge at Yami.

"IM GONNA RIP YOUR HEART OUT FROM YOUR DAMN THROAT!" Kaiba shouted.

Yami go into a fighting stance, but Jeff finally appeared before everybody. Kaiba stopped in his tracks and Yami turned towards him.

"Kaiba… Yugi… what are you guys doing now?"

"Nothing." Yami and Kaiba said.

"Then why did a large piece of steak just fly over my head, follow by a blood thirsty lion running past me?"

They both shrugged.

Joey began to think. _"I wonder where that steak landed?"_

**Location : Jungle : 1:20pm**

Maximillion Pegasus marched through the jungle, very pissed off. He was apparently looking for someone or something.

"First they vote me off the island, then they blow my company to hell! I'm gonna rip some asses apart!"

Suddenly, a large t-bone steak landed in Pegasus's hands.

"MMmmm! I haven't eaten yet either! This will go great with my Funny Bunny Comics, Red Wine Spritzer, and …"

Suddenly, the lion jumped Pegasus and began to maul him viciously.

"OH GOD! GET OFF ME! SOME ONE HELP! OH GOD! OH GOD! OH GOD!"

The Lion continued his assault while Pegasus yelled and screamed like a 5 year old girl.

**Location : Middle of the Island : 1:23pm**

The Pootiezongas gathered around as Jeff began his announcement.

"Ok guys, as you know, Today is New Year's Eve and you were forced to spend your holidays on this island." Jeff said.

"YEAH! CHRISTMAS WAS ALMOST RUINED AND THANKSGIVING… OH MAN, DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THAT!" Joey shouted

**Flashback…**

_Kaiba is chasing Yami Yugi around the living room with a large knife, Mako is eating fish, Joey, Mai, and Marik are fighting over random items on the table, and Rex is throwing dinner rolls, potato salad, and dressing at Bernadette, but misses with each item he threw. It was one hell of a Thanksgiving!_

**End of Flashback**

Jeff shook his head. "Which is living proof that you guys cannot do ANYTHING without security supervison from hear on out!" he declared. "Anyways, with the whole Pokemon incident, and all the other things that you all been through, we were all talking, and we thought it would be a good idea to do something to reward YOU ALL!"

Marik slapped his forehead. "Here it comes! Your gonna fuckin make us do community service, aren't you?"

"NO!" Jeff shouted. "Get ready for this… you guys are going to be… the special guests on New Years Rockin' Eve with Dick Clark!"

The Pootiezongas eyes each lit up. "Do NOT bullshit us, Probst!" Yami Yugi said. "if your lying, I will send your ass to the Shadow Realm SO fast!

"Its not lie. You guys, despite all the trouble you've caused, deserve it!"

"This is SO great! NO MORE ROUGHING IT! WE GET TO PARTY!" Mai said.

"Oh yeah! And its at Time Square isn't it! That place is gonna be bumpin' like the city of Compton!" Joey shouted.

Rex had a large grin on his face. "Oh man… ALL THOSE GIRLS! IM GONNA GET LAID FOR SURE!"

Marik nodded his head. "WE ARE GONNA GET _FUUUUKAY _TONIGHT!"

Kaiba closed his eyes, nodded his head, and smiled as he crossed his arms. _"I'll get to kill Yugi and everybody will be too drunk to know what happened… What a great way to ring in the new year with Yugi's head melted over my fireplace! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" _

"Wait a minute…" Yami thought. "Isn't New Years Rockin Eve on ABC?"

Jeff took out his cell phone. "I'll call the trailor and tell them were ready and to bring in a helicopter for us."

"Fuck that." Kaiba said. "If were going on New Year's Rockin' Eve, were going there in style!"

Kaiba pulled out his cell phone and made a quick call. Ten minutes later, a Kaiba Corporation Jet landed on this island. Everyone walked towards the Jet as the doors opened and Kaiba's trusted employee, Roland, sat at the controls.

"Now were ready to go." Kaiba said.

"Hang on." Jeff said. "There's one more person coming with us."

"Oh yeah? Whos that?" Yami Yugi asked.

Bernadette soon joined the others. "I'm here Jeff!" she called out. "Alright, now were ready to go!" Jeff said.

"OH FUCK THAT! IF THAT SKANK-A-SAURUS IS COMING THEN IM STAYING HOME AND SPENDING NEW YEARS WITH THAT DAMN LION!" Rex said as he started to walk away.

"REX!" Jeff called out. "GET YOUR SHORT ASS BACK OVER HERE SO WE CAN GO!"

Rex walked back to the group, cussing all the while.

The doors opened as the Duelists walked past Jeff and Bernadette and boarded the jet. As Rex walked by, Bernadette pinched his ass. Rex stopped in his tracks.

"DO NOT… EVER… EVVVVVER… TOUCH ME AGAIN, OR I WILL TORCH YOUR FAT ASS." He said as calm as he could, still looking forward.

As Jeff and Bernadette boarded, the doors closed and the engines began to roar. The jet lifted off the island and took off into the air, towards New York City.

The flight was a long one for poor Jeff. Yami Yugi kept picking up pieces of gravel off of the floor and throwing them at Kaiba's head. Kaiba tried to suppress his rage, but after the 210th piece, he tried to bash Yami's head off the window til it broke, trying to throw him off of the plain. Security pried Kaiba's hand's off of Yami's head and throat and the two were forced to sit on opposite sides of the Jet as if they were on time-out.

Joey kept trying to put his hand on Mai's leg, but every time she looked his why, he would pull his hand back and back on his lap, with sweat running down his face.

Rex kept changing seats. Every time he sat down, Bernadette would sit right next to him, staring at him and trying to touch his crotch. Even shouting the most offensive insults to a heavy set woman ever at Bernadette wouldn't keep her away from him.

Marik was the most well behaved Duelist of the bunch. He sat and read a book on Egyptian scriptures the whole time… or was he? He was actually reading a porno magazine in between the thick textbook like history book. He had a huge smile on his face the whole time.

In spite of all the craziness, the jet finally arrived in New York City.

**Location : Time Square… New York City… 8:00pm**

The Big Apple… New Year's Eve… A VERY nice mix if your looking for a party. The lights of Time Square lit up the streets as the lights on The Strip of Las Vegas. The sidewalk and streets were all filled with people for that one moment… to watch the large metal ball drop at 12am.

The ABC camera crew appeared before a man wearing a trench coat. He had his ABC microphone as he got ready to address the crowd.

"How are you doing tonight, everyone! I'm Dick Clark, and this is NEW YEARS ROCKIN EVE!"

The people in the streets all went crazy with cheers.

"And while we await the arrival of our special guests, here's a performance by Green Day, singing their hit, 'American Idiot!'"

Green Day began to play their song:

_Don't want to be an American idiot.  
Don't want a nation under the new media.  
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?  
The subliminal mindfuck America._

_Welcome to a new kind of tension.  
All across the alien nation.  
Everything isn't meant to be okay.  
Television dreams of tomorrow.  
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.  
Well that's enough to argue._

Suddenly, The Kaiba Corporation Jet appeared over Time Square an began to land on a helipad. The Cameras were suddenly taken off of Green Day and appeared on Dick Clark.

"OUR SPECIAL GUESTS HAVE ARRIVED! THE CAST FROM SURVIVOR, DUELIST STYLE, HAS JUST TOUCHED DOWN ON TIME SQUARE!"

The doors of the jet opened as Joey stepped out. The crowd went wild.

"THANK YOU! THANK YOU MY ADORING FANS!" he said, waving his arms around.

Joey was suddenly shoved out of the jet. "Move monkey! Make way for the champions!" Kaiba said as he marched out of the jet.

"WHAT! DON'T MAKE ME FUCK YOU UP AGAIN!" Joey shouted.

"In your dreams, mutt."

Obviously, Kaiba still doesn't remember when Joey attacked him in the Battle Royal Immunity Challenge. Yami Yugi was the next out of the jet, followed by Mai, then Marik, hiding his obvious "excitement" with his Egyptian Scriptures book, covering his crotch area. Finally, Rex ran at full speed off the plane, being followed by Bernadette. He stopped right next to Marik.

"DAMN! LOOK AT ALL THOSE GIRLS!" He shouted.

"I know… I need to go to the bathroom… NOW…" Marik said as he started to back away.

"Ok, Mai Valentine is in Time Square… at New Year's Rockin' Eve… and she doesn't have a friggin drink! WHERE THE HELL IS MY ALCOHOL?" Mai shouted.

Jeff walked up to her. "There will be PLENTY of time for that… but for now… we have to get ready for your New Years Eve Immunity Challenge!"

The Crowd continued to cheer and drink.

**Immunity Challenge!**

**Location : Time Square : 9:20pm**

After band after band performing and commercials and recaps of the year about to pass, it was time for something different… it was time for an Immunity Challenge! The Scene was on the stage with the Survivor logo in the background. The Pootiezongas all stood side by side… Yami Yugi, Joey, Mai, Marik, Rex, and Kaiba. (Yami and Kaiba had to be separated, by orders of Jeff Probst).

The cameras appeared on Dick Clark.

"Welcome back, everybody! We have a performance by Nelly, Billy Idol, Ashlee Simpson, and Simple Plan, but first, Here's Jeff Probst with a New Year's Eve Immunity Challenge!"

The Scene shifted back to the stage, where Jeff was standing in front of the Pootiezongas.

"How's everybody doing tonight!" he shouted. The crowd went wild.

"Alright! Well tonight's Immunity Challenge is… The Beer Blast!" The crowd went wild again as the Pootiezongas all shot excited looks at each other.

"The challenge is simple… the Survivors will each chug fifty mugs of drinks, and the last person drunk loses!"

Suddenly, the microphone was snatched from Jeff by Rex Raptor.

"Jeff… I just want you to know… that I love you in the most NONSEXUAL WAY right now." He said as he handed the microphone back to Jeff.

"The feeling is mutual. OK! SURVIVOR'S READY?"

"WAIT!" Mai shouted.

"Yes Mai?" Jeff said.

"What are we drinking?"

Dick Clark appeared next to Jeff. "Tonight's Immunity Challenge is brought to you by Smirnoff Ice!"

The Pootiezongas began to complain.

"THAT SHIT IS FOR PUSSIES!" Joey shouted.

"WHOEVER GETS DRUNK OFF THAT SHIT IS A LIGHTWEIGHT?" Yami shouted.

"Fine, fine!" Jeff said. Some ABC Stagehands appeared and took away all the Smirnoff Ice and brought Coronas back.

"WE'VE GOT CORONAS!" Dick said.

The Pootiezongas began to complain once again.

"WE WANT GOOD SHIT! NOT CARBONATED MOOSE PISS!" Joey shouted.

"Ok, Ok!" Dick said. The stagehands appeared once again and took away the Coronas, then brought in Rum and Coke.

"Do you guys have a problem with Rum and Coke?" Dick asked.

The Pootiezongas began to conversate among themselves, then turned back to Dick.

"No. Rum and Coke will be fine, hon." Mai said.

"OK!" Jeff shouted. "SURVIVORS READY?"

Each Duelist began to grab their mug.

"GO!"

The crowd went wild as the Pootiezongas began pounding drink after drink. This went on for almost an hour. Jeff and Dick looked at each other, then walked on the stage.

"How are you all doing?" Jeff asked. Rex threw an empty mug at the two hosts as it shattered two feet in front of them.

"Do… DO YOU NOT… SEE US… DRINKIN…" He said, slurring his words. Rex chugged another drink and looked back at Jeff and Dick.

"BITCHES!"

"Well we can safely assume that Rex is drunk." Dick said.

"Nah. He's always like that." Jeff said. "Wait… never mind, he can hardly stand up straight. Rex is drunk! How is everyone else doing?"

"MAN… FUCK THIS SHIT!" Kaiba said as he started to stumble away. "Fuck Immunity Challenges… fuck Survivor… and… and… fuck Yugi! Yeah!"

"Kaiba's gone." Dick said.

"Forget it. IT'S A DRAW!" Jeff shouted as the crowd went crazy once again.

Mai took one of the mugs and ran off the stage, taking off her purple jacket and pulling down her white top.

"WOOOO!" She shouted. Yami and Joey both looked at each other, then stumbled after Mai.

"LETS PARTY!" Jeff shouted.

And with that, it was on! A band began to play as people started dancing. Mai danced with four or five guys all around her. Joey was on the stage singing with the rock band.

Rex was in the streets when he noticed Paris Hilton. "OOOHH YEAH! THIS ONE… IS… SOOO IN THE BAG!"

Rex walked up to Paris and began talking to her. "Hey babe… ever… been with a… Regional fuckin' champion… and I do mean… FUCKIN'!"

Paris shot Rex a disturbed look. "Look, I don't know what you take me for, but I don't sleep with any guy that walks up to me… only if he has more money than I do."

"And… how… how much… is that…?"

Paris looked over and saw Kaiba stumbling past her, followed by a group of Kaiba fans.

"Like him!" she shouted. She walked up to Kaiba.

"Hey baby… you wanna…"

"Get your skinny skank ass away from me." Kaiba said as he kept walking.

Rex watched the scene with amazement as Marik walked up to him.

"Hey man… we gotta find Mai…" Marik slurred.

"Why." Rex said.

"Because… I slipped a lil' somethin'… special in her drink before that… you know… that Beer thingy we just did…"

Rex shot a perverted grin. "Something like what?"

Marik whispered something in his hear, which made Rex smile even brighter.

"Marik… I love you in the most nonsexual way! Lets go find her!"

The two of them began running drunkly through the crowd.

Yami Yugi was walking down the street, trying to find a bathroom.

"I GOTTA PISS! I GOTTA PISS!" Yami shouted, but he was assaulted by his fans.

"Man Yugi, you rock!"

"YOU CAN KICK KAIBA'S ASS!"

"Are you single?"

Suddenly, Kaiba appeared ten feet away from him.

"HEY… BITCH!" Kaiba yelled. Yami turned around to face his arch rival.

"What… what do you want… you fuck…" Yami slurred.

"I'm gonna kill your ass… tonight!"

"BRING IT ON!"

A large group gathered around. "They're gonna duel!" a man shouted.

"No they aren't, you idiot! They're gonna have a fist fight!"

Yami and Kaiba stared each other down for like two minutes. Finally, the two of them charged at each other. The crowd went wild with cheers. Suddenly, the two of them stopped.

"Hey… you hear that!" Kaiba asked.

"… I do…" Yami said.

"Shit… we cant fight right now…"

"Yes… we have to do…"

"OUR SONG AND DANCE NUMBER!" Yami and Kaiba shouted in unison.

The crowd began to look at each other confused. Yami Yugi and Kaiba both lined up next to each other, then began to disco dance. Music was playing in both of their drunk heads, as only the two of them can hear it. The rivals began to sing:

"_Oooo, Ooooooo… DO IT! Oooo, Oooooo… DO IT!"_

They began to dance one more time, then sang again:

"_DO THE HUSTLE! DO THE HUSTLE!"_

The crowd watched with amazement and confusion, til finally, then went wild with applauds.

Back at the stage, Mai was dancing topless on the stage as a band kept performing. She was feeling up on the three guitarists and the drummer. Rex and Marik arrived at the scene just in time.

"YES!" Marik shouted. "LOOKS LIKE THE X KICKED IN!"

Rex, not wasting a single moment, leaped on the stage and began freak dancing with Mai. Normally, Mai wouldn't allow this, but seeing as how she was drunk and on X, she didn't mind at all.

"OH HELL NAW!" Marik shouted. "SAVE SOME FOR ME!" Marik jumped on the stage and began dancing on the other side of Mai. Her only response was a loud, "WOOOO!"

Once the band was done, they lead Mai, Marik, and Rex back to their extremely large tour bus and locked the door.

**Ladies and gentlemen… it finally happened. Hell has frozen over… the apocalypse is upon us… REX RAPTOR FINALLY GOT LAID!**

**Location : Time Square : 11: 59pm**

Everyone was gathered in Time Square as the countdown began. Dick and Jeff watched the large digital clock on one of the buildings as the countdown began.

"Were just 30 seconds away from the new year. Jeff, is there any your thankful for about this past year? Anything at all?" Dick asked.

"Yeah… I'm thankful for the patience I had to deal with those damn duelists…" Jeff said, obviously drunk.

"Here it comes…" Dick said as he watched the giant, lit up metal ball.

Everyone in Time Square began to count down.

"**10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…"**

**HAPPY NEW YEARS!**

Every couple in Time Square began to make out with one another. Joey with Mai, Yugi, Kaiba, and Marik all with a random single girl, and Rex with, of all people, Bernadette! (Yeah, hes still drunk!) Everyone in Time Square began to sing:

_Should old acquaintances be forgotten,  
And never brought to mind?  
Should old acquaintances be forgotten,  
And days of long ago !_

"What a New Years! And it could only have been done… Duelist Style! Well Everyone, this is Dick Clark from Time Square… signing off! SEE YOU NEXT NEW YEARS EVE!"

**Location : Middle of Destiny Island : January 1st, 20XX : 12:30pm**

The Pootiezongas and Jeff were hungover. They could barely stand up straight.

"Well… that was one hell of a New Years huh?" Jeff asked.

"Jeff… why cant you be cool like that all the time?" Joey asked.

"Because this wouldn't be Survivor, now would it?" Jeff said. "Now I know its early… but I'm so fuckin hungover its not even funny… so lets get this Tribal Council out the way to I can go back to bed…"

Rex held a gun to his head.

"Rex! What the hell are you doing!" Marik said.

"I fuckin made out with Bernadette… Ever since that damn ball dropped, AND the whole way home! I want to be put out of my fuckin misery…"

"But you finally had sex last night, man…!"

Rex lowered the gun. "Good point."

"Ok, since there was no winner last night, what were gonna do is…"

Suddenly, Joey, Kaiba, Rex, Mai, and Marik all began to turn green in the face. They all fell over unconscience.

"What the… What the hell just happened!" Jeff asked.

"I… I DON'T KNOW!" Yami Yugi said. Suddenly, a techie from CBS ran up to Jeff.

"Dick Clark is on the phone, Jeff." He said.

"Thanks." Jeff said as he took the phone. "Whats up, Dick?"

"Um, you aren't going to believe this, but a majority of the guys from last night got sick… even one of the bands… they all turned green in the face and fell down unconscience!" Dick said from the phone.

That was when It hit Yugi. "WAIT A FUCKIN MINUTE! THOSE ARE ALL THE GUYS THAT SLEPT WITH MAI!" he shouted.

Jeff turned to Yugi. "Ok… since you're the only one left, its your call Yugi. Who do YOU want off the Island?"

"I WANT MAI'S ASS VOTED OFF! THAT DIRTY WHORE!" Yami shouted.

"Then its settled… once Mai comes to, she will be escorted off the island… now I'm taking an asprin and going to bed." Jeff said.

Yami held his head. "Me too… fuck this shit." The Millennium Puzzle flashed as Little Yugi stood there.

"FINALLY! YAHOO! IM FINALLY ON THE SHOW! ITS BEEN SO LONG… WHAT, WERE GOING OFF THE AIR! OH FUCK THAT! YOU CANT GO OFF THE AIR YET! IM FINALLY IN THE STORY AND…"

**And so, Mai's been voted off and Little Yugi is FINALLY out of the Puzzle. Now there's 5 Duelists left… who will be next? Marik? Kaiba? Rex? Joey perhaps? Maybe even the star himself, Yugi! Find out next time on Survivor! Duelist Style!**

**Ok Everybody… were coming down to the wire with 5 Duelists left. I think its about time I started on another Fan Fic. But which one should I do? I've got Ideas for Teen Titans, Dragon Ball Z, Inuyasha, Naruto, Sonic the Hedgehog, and two more Yu-Gi-Oh! fan fics. One is an Action/Adventure, and the other is another comedy. I don't think I'll be able to top this one, but I'll damn sure try, so be on the look out! Until then, please R&R!**


	14. Infiltration of Destiny Island

Whats up everybody! Ok, I've been getting asked how I come up with all my material for my fan fics, so I'm gonna tell u… though I doubt it'll help. When I was growing up, I didn't really have any friends on my block because it was in an old people neighborhood on a mountain housing track. All my friends lived in like the city area and what not, so the only "friends" I had were my toys (Which I have on display in my room… except for when I bring girls over) and cartoons. There were my sibs, but we're completely different people. So yeah, there's my story! I had to entertain myself when I was little! So without further ado, here's chapter 14!

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! nor do I own Survivor

**Location : Duelist Kingdom : 8:47pm**

Maximillion Pegasus gathered all sorts of individuals to his castle in Duelist Kingdom. As the famous saying goes, "Shit's about to hit the fan."

In the dining room, all the people that were called by Pegasus sat with a block of cheese and wine on their plates. Pegasus paced back and forth, until he finally stopped and faced the others.

"Now… I suspose your all wondering why I called you all here… As we know… in one way or another, we have all been disgraced, and udderly humiliated by the hands of that damn Yugi Muto, Seto Kaiba, Joseph Wheeler, and those other two pussies! Take me for example. Not only was I, of all people, the first person voted off, but those damn ruffians blew my company to hell! And that is just NOT good for business!"

Weevil Underwood stood up. "I got voted off because of Kaiba and that dinosaur loving bastard who couldn't even get a prostitute to sleep with him!" Weevil then slammed his fist on the table. "I WANT SOME RETRIBUTION, DAMMIT!"

"Actually… if you saw the last episode, you would have seen that Rex actually had sex with Mai." Odion said as he stuffed a block of cheese in his mouth.

"Shut up, Odion! Who's side are you on, anyways!" Weevil said.

Bonz stood up next. "I didn't even GET voted off! I got kicked off because I was sick!" Those damn producers are gonna pay with my _ZOMBIE_ Deck!"

"SIT DOWN YOU LITTLE FUCK!" Bandit Keith shouted. "YOU ALL KNOW WHO I AM! I WASN'T EVEN CONSIDED FOR THIS DAMN SHOW! AND FOR THAT, SOMEONE IS GOING TO GET MY SIZE 13, ALL AMERICAN, HARLEY DAVIDSON BOOT SHOVED DIRECTLY UP THEIR ASSES! AND I GOT MY EYES ON THAT SCRAWNY PUNK JOEY WHEELER!"

"I never got considered either!" Espa Roba said. It was his turn to take the floor. "I was only in two friggin episodes on Yu-Gi-Oh! but I'm still a duelist right! I should have gotten every right to be on that damn show! And for that, bitches are gonna fry!"

"Espa! You said you would take us to the water slide!" one of Espa's brothers said, who was sitting next to him. "I TOLD YOU GUYS TO BE QUIET! WERE IN FRONT OF THE DUELISTS!"

Pegasus walked to Espa's brothers. "Aren't you all just soo cute! Here's a key. Go play in my personal theme park!"

The young boys snatched the key and cheered as they hauled ass out of the castle.

Suddenly a loud belch was heard across the table. Yami Bakura finished a large steak and fries, and was chugging down some wine from the bottle. "Are you bitches through crying? All I wanna do is send a couple bastards to the Shadow Realm, then go back to gettin' my grub on!"

Pegasus got everyone's attention. "Ok, ok, we all want a piece of Yugi-boy, Kaiba-boy, and the rest, so now that we are all here, its time to explain our battle plan. Come on in, Dukey-boy!"

Duke Devlin entered the dining room pushing a projector. As he plugged it in, a large pull-down screen dropped from the ceiling. Weevil blinked as he looked at Duke.

"Hey, I know you! Your friends with Yugi!" he shouted. Duke looked back at him.

"Bullshit! I was only using him so that I could learn his strategy, then beat him at Duel Monsters, so the popularity of Dungeon Dice Monsters can skyrocket!"

"Too bad that game is a piece of shit that's only entertaining to a group of six year olds." Bandit Keith said as he put his legs up on the table.

Duke dropped all the wires and turned to Bandit Keith. "WHAT'D YOU SAY, YANKEE? I DARE YOU TO SAY IT AGAIN! I DARE YOU TO SAY THAT SHIT IN MY FACE!"

"You heard me, bitch!" Keith said. "Besides, I ain't gettin' anywhere near your gay ass. You might try to kiss me or something with that flamin' ass ponytail and that dice dangling from your ear. Seriously, are you gay or something? You look like one of the Village People."

"OH THAT'S IT!" Duke charged at Duke, but only to be stopped by Pegasus.

"Devlin-boy… he's like three times your size. I seriously don't think you wanna be messing with him."

Duke grubbed as he continued to fiddle with the projector.

"**_Cough!Cough!_**Bitch!**_Cough!Cough!" _**Keith said with a huge smile on his face.

Duke did his best to ignore Keith. "The projector's done, Pegasus."

"Excellent!" Pegasus said. He clapped hands twice as the lights went off.

"Alright Gentlemen! We'll strike tomorrow night at around 8pm. If my sources are correct, those duelists will be exhausted from their… Challenge… so we'll be able to hit them hard and fast!"

Pegasus signaled Duke to change to the next slide. Duke pulled the tiny lever, which changed the slide to a map of Destiny Island. The map was marked precise, from the Pootiezonga Mansion to the sauna on the old Pootietang property, to the CBS Campsite. The map was obviously marked with drop points all over it. Pegasus pulled out a pointer and began pointing at key points on the map.

"OK, we'll decend from the chopper here, in front of the Pootiezonga mansion, a few of us will bust in from the front, while the rest breaks in from the roof. Once we corner them, they'll be ALL ours! Now, we might have to use brute force, since a certain SOMEONE stole my Millennium Eye…" Pegasus started to glare down Yami Bakura.

Yami Bakura looked up with a leg of lamb sticking out of his mouth. "Hey… I beat that ass fair and square!" he said with his mouth full of meat.

"BULLSHIT!" Pegasus shouted. "FAIR ANDA SQUARE MY ASS! YOU LITERALLY WAITED TIL I WAS WEAKED FROM MY SHADOW GAME WITH YUGI TO TAKE ME ON! BECAUSE YOU KNEW IF I WAS FRESH, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN MY BITCH!"

Yami Bakura started to chug some wine to wash down the lamb. "Ever hear the saying, 'work smart, not hard'? Or is it stupid? Oh well, you get what I'm saying."

Duke Devlin flipped the lever again, and there was a drawing of Pegasus holding hands with a drawn body and a picture of Justin Timberlake's head cut out and pasted on the body.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Bandit Keith shouted. Pegasus quickly clapped his hands twice and ran over and pulled the plug of the projector. "AND THAT WRAPS UP OUR PRESENTATION! Does anyone have any questions?"

Keith raised his hand. Pegasus looked over at him and squinted his eye. "THAT INVOLVES OUR DUELIST DESTROYER MISSION AND NOT MY FANTASY… I MEAN PICTURE!"

Keith slowly put his hand down and crossed his arms. "You are a sick, sick fuck…"

"If there are no questions, then let us prepare for our battle!" Pegasus said, throwing his fist up into the air."

"But what about my brothers?" Espa asked. "Don't worry. They'll be fine in my castle." Pegasus answered.

"…its not them I'm worred about… it's the castle…"

Pegasus, Bandit Keith, Weevil, Espa, Duke, Odion, Bonz, and Yami Bakura (with an armful of food) went to the elevator, which took them to Pegasus' private helicopter. The chopper blades began to whirl, then it took to the air and made it's way towards Destiny Island.

**Location : Elm Pokemon Lab / Johto Region : 9:00pm**

On Christmas eve, a large explosion took place. This forced many people (and Pokemon) to take refuge in the Johto Region. In the Elm Pokemon lab, a few trainers were gathered for a new plan against the Duelists.

Ash Ketchem stepped forward.

"Ok everyone… we have been humiliated time and time again by that damn Yu-Gi-Oh! But this time, this WILL be different. We WILL have our revenge! That explosion was NO freak accident. I know in my heart that those Duelists blew up a part of our world. But when those bitches decided to rip off our Pokerap, they just started World War fuckin' Three with us!"

"But Ash… you saw what they did to us… Maybe this time we should just let it go." Brock said.

"NO FUCK THAT!" Ash shouted. "This time, were gonna hit those bitches where it hurts!"

"Kaiba Corporation?" Misty asked.

"No… Destiny Island!"

"Wait… your not suggesting that we attack them head on again, are you?" May said.

"Yeah… you saw what… what they did to my poor Scyther!" Tracey said, eyes blood-shot red (he was still crying about it).

"OH no… this time, I'm enlisting some help." Ash said as he picked up the phone. "Hello, operator? Could you please connect me to…"

**5 Duelists…**

**Yugi Muto… Joey Wheeler… Seto Kaiba… Rex Raptor… Marik Ishtar…**

**2 Prizes…**

**3 Million Dollars…. Treasure Chest full of rare cards…**

**WHO WILL BE THE WINNER? FIND OUT WHO GET'S THE BOOT TODAY ON…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

The lights were off as a squeaking of a bed could be heard, followed by noises that you would hear in an adult movie. Behind a closed door, you could hear Rex Raptor say,

"Oooohh yeah Tea… give it to me baby!"

Seto Kaiba walked by and heard what was going on. "What the fuck is that!" he said. He pulled out one of his many credit cards and swiped it through the door, instantly unlocking it. He then flipped the light switch. Kaiba's face turned pail as he saw the most disturbing thing has has ever seen.

Rex looked over at him, very upset. "DAMMIT KAIBA! CANT YOU SEE ME AND TEA IS TRYING TO FUCK IN HERE!"

"RAPTOR! YOUR EVEN MORE STUPID THAN I THOUGHT YOU WERE! THAT'S NOT TEA!"

"WHAT!"

Rex looked over to see that he was really having sex with Bernadette.

The Cameras zoomed out on Destiny Island as a loud, blood curdling scream was heard.

**Location : Middle of the Island : 12:43pm**

Rex stumbled around holding a bottle of malt liquor in his right hand. "I…hate… my…life…" He muttered. Laughter could be heard from the other side of some bushes. Rex walked through to see Bernadette talking to Yugi, Joey, and Marik. She turned around and shot a seductive look to Rex.

"Hey baby! I was just telling the others about our hardcore night last night." She said.

Joey was laughing too hard to even reply.

"Someone is DESPARATE for some pussy!" Marik said with a huge grin on his face.

"Well Rex… I didn't know you into that saying, 'more cushion for the pushin'!" Yugi said with a grin.

"… Fuck you guys… fuck you all in your filthy, sweaty assholes…" Rex said as he started to stumble away.

"…NO! NO… YOU DID THAT ALREADY!" Joey shouted in between laughs.

Rex snapped as he threw his bottle. He was so tipsy however, that it went over everyone's heads. Yugi, Joey, and Marik began to laugh again.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor**

"You know what! IVE FUCKIN HAD IT! YOU HEARD ME RIGHT! IVE HAD IT! EVER SINCE THAT FAT BITCH ARRIVED ON THIS ISLAND, ITS JUST BEEN BULLSHIT AFTER BULLSHIT AFTER BULLSHIT AFTER BULLSHIT! SO IM THROUGH! IM GONNA FUCKIN ELIMINATE MYSELF! NO AMOUNT OF RARE CARDS OR MONEY IS WORTH ALL THE SHIT IVE BEEN THROUGH!"

A rustling sound came through the bushes. Yugi, Joey, and Marik turned around.

"What the fuck was that?" Joey said.

"I'm taking over." Said a voice through the Millennium Puzzle.

"OH HELL NO!" Yugi screamed. "IM NOT GOING BACK IN THERE! YOU'VE BEEN OUT FOR DAMN THERE 5 EPISODES!"

"YU-GI-OOOOOHHHHH!"

Yami Yugi stood before Joey and Marik. Marik nodded his head. "… Pharaoh… Welcome back." He said.

"Thank you." Yami said. "Get ready… theres no telling what is in those bushes."

Suddenly, Tea popped out!

"TEA!" Yami and Marik shouted. Joey's mouth dropped.

Yami ran and hugged her, rubbing his face in her breasts. "Tea… what happened to you? We heard you went missing! We didn't know what happened to you!" he said.

"BLAME THIS BASTARD!" Tea shouted, pointing at Joey. "HE TOLD SOME DWARFS THAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT THEM, SO THEY KIDNAPPED ME AND HAVE BEEN TORTURING ME SINCE… so… many… tiny… dicks…"

"NO! IT WAS TRISTAN! I SWEAR!" Joey said, with a face, innocent look on his face. "He's already been voted off! He's back in Domino!"

"Ok… he's mine!" Tea said. She turned to Joey. "If I find out your lying, I'm going to Loraina Bobbett style on your ass… you hear me?"

"YES!" Joey said as he held his crotch.

Tea walked off with a purpose.

Marik shook his head as he watched Tea walk off. _"Damn… nice ass!" _He thought.

**Rewards Challenge! YAY!**

**  
Location : Beach : 2:00pm**

Yami Yugi, Joey, Marik, Rex, and Kaiba stood on the Beach before Jeff. The Pootiezongas each held a paper like material that was green and had a symbol of the moon on it.

"It's been a while since we had a Reward's Challenge." Yami said.

"Seriously. I wonder what da prize is…" Joey said.

"Ok, as you all know, you've each been handed $500 Moon Bucks." Jeff said.

"What the fuck is a Moon Buck?" Rex said.

"I was getting to that!" Jeff shot back. "A Moon Buck is the money that you will be using for your Reward's Challenge. Your Challenge today is called, Food Auction! I will be auctioning off random food items, and whoever runs out of Moon Bucks is out! You can bet as much as you want, and its just like a regular auction… only with food."

"Sweet!" Joey shouted.

"Good… because these fuckin' hogs cleaned out every scrap from the survival kit… even the damn cookie crumbs!" Kaiba said.

**Today's Reward's Challenge is sponcered by McDonalds!**

Jeff looked around. "WHAT THE FUCK! NO ITS NOT!"

**Today's Reward's Challenge is sponcered by Pizza Hut!**

"NO IT ISNT! SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

**Today's Reward's Challenge is sponcered by Anubis Mini-Markets!**

"IM GONNA KILL YOU! NO IT FUCKIN' ISNT!"

The Pootiezongas all had the anime sweat drops falling from the back of their heads.

"Let the games begin!" Jeff shouted as some CBS Stagehands brought over a bunch of props and a large box. Jeff reached inside the box and pulled out a large cheeseburger.

"The first item up for bid is a cheeseburger! Do I have 10 Moon Bucks?"

"10!" Joey shouted.

"I HEAR 10, I HEAR 10, I HEAR 10! DO I HEAR 20?"

"20!" Marik shouted.

"20! 20! 20! DO I HEAR 25?"

"30!" Rex shouted.

"OOOOOOOOHHH, 30 GOING ONCE… GOING TWICE… SOLD FOR 30 MOON BUCKS TO REX RAPTOR!"

"GO REX! GO REX! ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY!" Rex shouted as he did a little dance, then ran and grabbed his cheeseburger. After forking over 30 Moon Bucks that is.

"Next Item up for grabs… a bowl full of Chicken Nuggets! I'll start the bid at 15 Moon Bucks!"

"100!" Joey shouted.

"I GOT 100! I GOT 100! I GOT 100! DO I HEAR 150?"

"For chicken nuggets? Fuck that." Marik said.

"I'll wait… there's bound to be a bad ass prize somewhere along these lines." Yami Yugi said.

"100 GOING ONCE… GOING TWICE… SOLD TO JOEY WHEELER FOR 100 MOON BUCKS!"

"HOODY HOO!" Joey shouted as he took the large bowl full of nuggets.

**20 minutes later…**

**Results: **

**Yami Yugi : 500 Moon Bucks**

**Joey Wheeler : 175 Moon Bucks**

**Rex Raptor : 100 Moon Bucks**

**Marik Ishtar : 70 Moon Bucks**

**Seto Kaiba : 205 Moon Bucks**

Jeff wiped sweat from his face. "Ok Pootiezongas, the next item is… A MYSTERY BOX…"

"_THERE WE GO!" _Yami Yugi thought. _"THAT'S THE PRIZE I WAS WAITING FOR!"_

"A mystery box? What the fuck is inside!" Kaiba said.

"That's the mystery!" Jeff said. "I'll start the bid at.."

"500 MOON BUCKS!" Yami Yugi shouted.

"SOLD TO YUGI MUTO!"

"YES!" Yami ran up and opened up the large box. The box was nicely wrapped with sky blue wrapping paper that was covered with question marks. Yami tore the box opened. "Now… lets see what bad ass prize lurks inside…"

Bernadette popped out of the box. "SURPRISE!" she shouted as she pulled Yami Yugi inside.

"NOOOOOOOOO!" Yami shouted from inside the box.

"DON'T WORRY! IM HERE TO HELP!" Kaiba shouted as he ran into the jungle. He returned a few seconds later with a tool box and some chains. He grabbed the lid to the large box and threw it on top, then nailed it shut with a hammer and some spikes. Then he wrapped the large box up with chains and ended it by locking it with a large pad lock. Kaiba then pushed the large box off the cameras.

"Seto… I thought you said…" Jeff said.

"I SAID I was hear to help. Sorry if you thought I meant helping Yugi's bitch ass!" Kaiba said with a smirk.

"Anyways… the next item is…"

And so… the Immunity Challenge ended with Joey, Rex, Marik, and Kaiba having a feast with all the food they bought, and poor Yugi raped by the fat nurse. He mustered enough shadow powers to escape the box a few hours later.

**Location : Pootiezonga Mansion : 9:58pm**

Pegasus' Helicopter finally arrived at Destiny Island. Pegasus looked downward at the mansion.

"There it is… I guess it's good that were a little late. All the lights are off, which means they must be asleep." Pegasus said. He then turned to Bonz.

"Next time, TELL ME IF YOU GET AIR SICK!"

"Yeah, you nasty little fuck!" Duke shouted, trying to scrub vomit off of his shoes.

"…Sorry…" Bonz said.

"Ok, we all know the plan… this is it! This is not a drill! Weevil! Espa Roba! Duke! Bonz! Prepare to drop!" Pegasus said.

The four of them put on a parachute. The doors opened. The 4 of them dove out of the chopper. They each pulled the cord, and the parachutes shout out from the back pack. They landed gently on the roof of the mansion.

"… They've landed." Odion said.

"Ok! Its time for the next phase! Are you ready?" Pegasus said.

"Lets rock this bitch." Keith said.

The floor hatched opened as four ropes descended from the chopper and touched down in front of the Pootiezonga mansion. Pegasus, Bandit Keith, Yami Bakura, and Odion put on some special gloves, then jumped through the hatch, then grabbed the ropes as they slid down the rope. They touched down on the ground and walked up to the mansion.

"No turning back now." Odion said.

Bandit Keith kicked down the door, and the others charged inside.

The lights suddenly came on as Yugi and Kaiba were standing side by side facing their rivals.

"Well look what we have here. A class reunion of losers." Kaiba said.

"What the… why aren't you asleep! And why are you standing here in the dark?" Pegasus said.

"Well we WERE sleep… until I heard a fuckin helicopter flying around the house!" Yugi said.

Bandit Keith slapped Pegasus in the head. "I TOLD YOU NOT TO FLY SO FUCKIN' LOW TO THE GROUND!"

"Move, you fuckin clowns!" Yami Bakura said. Darkness began to surround him and Yami Yugi.

"PHARAOH! ITS TIME FOR THE ULTIMATE SHADOW GAME!"

"YOUR ON!"

The two of them disappeared into the darkness. Pegasus, Keith, and Odion stared Kaiba down.

"Kaiba-boy… I hope your ready to get your ass kicked!" Pegasus said.

"Bitch please. I can take all three of you losers with both my arms tied behind my back!"

**Upstairs…**

Espa Roba, Bonz, Weevil, and Duke walked quietly through the mansion.

"Ok… if my memory serves me right, the first room we'll hit will be Rex Raptor's room. Remember, that bastard is mine!" Weevil said quietly.

**(WHACK!)**

"What the hell was that!" Weevil said. Espa and Bonz turned around to see that Duke was gone.

"What the hell happened to Devlin?" said Bonz.

**(WHACK!)**

Espa and Weevil turned to see Bonz was gone this time.

"This house is haunted!" Weevil shouted. The lights came on as an unconscience Duke and Bonz laided out in front of Weevil and Espa. Standing behind them was Joey, Rex, and Marik stood in front of the intruders.

"Well, would you look what stegosaurus dragged in!" Rex said.

"H-h-how did you know…" Weevil said.

"Free house robbing tip… next time you wanna break into someone's house, you might wanna check for infrared lasers which sets off ALARMS in everyone's rooms!" Joey said.

Espa and Weevil looked at each other. Joey cracked his knuckles. "This is gonna be fun! I have had a REAL fight in the longest time.

Espa got into a fighting stance. "WE CAN TAKE YOU! RIGHT WEEVIL? … WEEVIL?"

Espa turned around to see Weevil running for dear life. Rex took off after him. "I'll deal with bug boy! You two deal with that wanna be psychic!"

Back downstairs, Pegasus was backed against a wall. Bandit Keith and Odion were on the floor unconscience, with smoke rising from their charred clothes.

"I cant believe you! H-how did you set up laser beams around this living room!" Pegasus said, startled.

"… I should thank you bastards for testing those for me. I had originally planned that for Yugi. Now that I know it works, ill just have to recharge those tonight. But for now…"

Kaiba ran over and punched Pegasus in the stomach. And he cringed over in pain, holding his gut, Kaiba delivered a double ax smash to the back of Pegasus' head, instantly knocking him out.

"Step your pansy ass back on my property again and ill set those lasers for KILL!" Kaiba said as he picked up Pegasus and threw him on top of Keith and Odion. He pulled out his cell phone and made a phone call.

"Hello, is this Waste Management? Hi, this is Seto Kaiba. You might wanna come and pick up the garbage that's in front of my mini-mansion… and you might wanna get that helicopter that seems to be parked in the air above my house… because if it falls… You know what? Leave the helicopter. Just come pick up the sacks of crap that I'm gonna leave outside my door."

Kaiba hung up his cell, then proceeded to walk outside, dragging Pegasus, then Bandit Keith, then Odion outside on the poarch. He then climbed up the ropes to the helicopter.

"_I can use this bitch to kill Yugi if my laser idea fails!"_

The shadows inside the house disappeared as Yami Yugi stood victoriously and Regular Bakura sat next to him. Yami turned to him. "Don't worry. I'll tell the CBS Producers to take you home." he said.

"Well that's good… I hate it when that evil bastard takes control of my body!" Bakura said.

"… then you might wanna STOP PUTTING ON THE MILLENNIUM RING!" Yami said.

"Oh… heh heh! Right!"

Joey came downstairs dragging Espa Roba and Duke Devlin behind him, followed by Rex dragging Weevil by his hair, then Marik dragging Bonz. They were each unconscience (the intruders).

"Man Yuge. I cant believe they would pull some shit like this." Joey said.

"Yeah… worse then those damn Pokemon Trainers. Oh well. Throw em' outside. Jeff can decide what to do with them." Yami said. "I'm goin' back to bed."

Rex, Joey, and Marik threw the rest of the unconscience Duelists outside, then locked the door as Bakura left for the CBS Campsite. Rex walked past a closet door that was left opened. He was dragged inside, followed by a locking sound. Bernadette had once again got the best of Rex.

"HEY BABY! READY FOR SOME MORE LOVIN'?"

"HELL NO! HELLLLLLLPPPPP!"

**Immunity Challenge!**

**Location : Middle of the Island : 3:43pm**

Yami Yugi, Kaiba, Joey, and Marik stood before Jeff in a familiar spot. The spot where most of the Survivor news took place.

"Well, those Duelists who broke into your house last night were taken into custody, and Bakura was returned to Domino. Were gonna start beefing security up around the island." Jeff announced.

"You better, because I don't enjoy staining my hands with the filth of losers… some who shall remain nameless…" Kaiba said looking at Joey.

"FUCK YOU, KAIBA!" Joey shouted.

"Anyways, we'll start your Immunity Challenge once Rex gets here… where is…"

Rex finally stumbled up before them, with a VERY unhappy look on his face. "I hate that fat bitch! I SWEAR I HATE THAT FAT BITCH!" Rex shouted.

"Whats wrong, Rex? Tired from doing the Mattress Mambo with Bernadette!" Marik said as he started laughing.

"BLOW OFF, MARIK!" Rex shouted.

"Now now!" Jeff shouted. "Ok, since Rex is finally here, your next Immunity Challege is something NONE of you should have a problem with! It's an insult contest! You will each insult one another, and I will judge on how well the other gets slammed and originality! One rule… there are NO paybacks. Meaning if Kaiba bags on Joey, Joey isn't allowed to insult Kaiba back."

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor**

"Ok, I know I said I was going to get myself eliminated, but a challenge where I get to insult these morons should be fun! But next episode, I am EXTINCTED from this damn show!"

"OOOoooohhh am I gonna enjoy this…" Joey said.

"Ok, we'll start with Marik, then Rex, then Joey, then Seto, then Yugi. SURVIVORS READY?" Jeff said.

Marik looked at Rex. "Hey Rex, your so poor that you went to McDonald's and put a happy meal on layaway!"

Jeff turned his head a little to snicker.

"FUCK YOU MARIK!"

"I give that a 5 out of 10! Your turn Rex! Remember, you cant insult Marik back."

"Ok, whatever… Hey Kaiba… what are you going to do for a face when the baboon wants its ass back?"

"What are you, like four?" Kaiba said.

"I'll give that one a 4 our of 10. Ok Joey, your up!" Jeff said.

"Hey Kaiba! Your teeth are so yellow that cars slow down when they see you smile!" Joey shouted.

"Grow up, Wheeler." Kaiba said, shaking his head.

Jeff tried not to laugh. "6 out of 10. Ok Seto! Its your turn!

Kaiba cracked his Knuckles. "Wheeler… Raptor… your lucky I cant get you fuckers. Yugi…Yo mamma's so fat, she had her baby pictures taken by satellite."

Rex, Joey, and Marik each held their mouths. "OOOOooooohhh!"

"Good one!" Jeff said. "How will Yugi retailiate? By the way, that insult was a 7 out of 10."

Yami stepped forward.

"Hey Marik… if I had like 15 more cents, I would have been your daddy."

Rex, Joey, and Jeff broke down laughing. Even Kaiba himself let out a snicker.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT MY MOM LIKE THAT! ILL KILL YOU!" Marik said as he tried to charge Yami Yugi. Security grabbed him from charging.

"Yugi… that's a 10 out of 10! You win the Immunity Challenge! We all know the routine. Meet back at the Tribal Council for the voting!" Jeff said as he walked away laughing.

"15 more cents… I have GOT to remember that one!" Jeff said.

**Tribal Council : 10:02pm**

The five Duelists stood before Jeff holding their torches. It was time for the vote. The Pootiezongas would only be 4 members after this vote.

"_This is it!" _Rex thought. _"This is my chance to get voted off!"_

"Alright survivors. Welcome to the Tribal Council. Marik, how do you feel about…"

"DUDE! LETS JUST START THE VOTE!" Rex shouted.

"Fine, bastard! Get to voting!" Jeff said.

Yami Yugi walked up to the vote box, followed by Joey, then Rex, then Marik, then Kaiba.

Jeff took out the votes and read them off to everyone.

"Ok.. one vote for Marik… another vote for Marik.. one for Rex… another for Marik, and one for Joey… Ok Marik, hand me your torch."

"FUCK! I WAS CLOSE! I WAS SOO CLOSE!" Marik shouted as he presented Jeff his torch. The torch was doused, then tossed away. "Marik, the tribe has spoken. You are hereby voted off. We thank you for surviving this long!"

Yami Yugi, Seto Kaiba, Joey Wheeler, and Rex Raptor returned to the Mansion.

Rex lagged behind, then kicked a tree. "FUCK! WHY THE FUCK WAS I THE ONLY ONE WHO VOTED FOR ME?

Suddenly, Bernadette popped out of some bushes. "Hey baby… sounds like you need a pick-me-up!"

"NOOOOOOO!"

Rex was pulled into the bushes as garments of clothes went flying out. And so, another duelist was voted off… Were down to 4! Who's going to be next? And what is Ash planning for the Duelist this time? Find out next time on Survivor! Duelist Style!

**The show is nearing a close as we are down to four Duelists! You'll be happy to hear that I thought of a sequel to this story that wont put it to shame! Sorry, but that's all I can tell you for now! In the mean time, please R&R! If you'll excuse me, I have to put up Chapter 2 of Duel Monster Frontier.**


	15. Win, Lose, or Drop!

Sorry this took so long... my parents decided to clean out the computer, and the result was catastrophic... EVERYTHING I had on my computer is gone... and I was halfway done with this chapter, now I have to start ALL over! I hope I can redeem the first part. That and the fact that my finals… I was on wits end about that… but its all over now!

Anyways, moving right along, Atemu's Lover, what do you mean when you say, "POST POST POST!"? You want me to post this up on the Internet or something? Lord Nysakeo, I saw your profile man! I dont mind at all that you used my format... cause I kinda burrowed it off other profiles! And Finally, Malik Ishtar Sekhmet, sorry about the joke about Malik's mom. I had originally had that planned for Kaiba, but I wanted to target someone else for a change. Chill out, ok? Smiles

Check out my profile to see what I've been up to. Til then, heres the next Chapter!

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! nor do I own Survivor

**4 Duelists…**

**Yugi Muto… Joey Wheeler… Seto Kaiba… Rex Raptor… **

**2 Prizes…**

**3 Million Dollars…. Treasure Chest full of rare cards…**

**WHO WILL BE THE WINNER? FIND OUT WHO GET'S THE BOOT TODAY ON…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Rex Raptor**

"Ok, this is it! Today is the day! I am seriously getting voted off! Week after Week after Week, I have been raped by that incredibly large whale of a woman, and I'm fuckin' sick of it! I don't deserve this! I'm a regional champion, dammit! Well no more! this show isn't worth the bullshit I've been through, so if i cant get voted off, I'm just leaving in general!"

Well, its another beautiful Morning on Destiny Island as the cameras film all sorts of exotic loactions on this island. The scene then shifts to the inside of the Pootiezonga Mansion as Joey sits on the couch with a tableful of food that he won at the past Rewards Challenge, watching TV. Then there was Rex's room... there were KEEP OUT signs posted all over the doors, as well as barbed wire and land mines too keep a certain nurse out. The cameras were about to view the kitchen, until they were pulled aside by Yami Yugi.

"Hey, come with me!" he said as he grabbed the cameraman by his arm.

"Where are we going, Yugi?" the cameraman asked.

"You'll see!"

**(A/N: The following scene is based on a TRUE event. I'm Yami Yugi, my other friend Dylan is the Cameraman, and my best friend Eli (Goten) is Kaiba. I repeat... this really happened!)**

Yami led the man upstairs, to one of the many master bedrooms. Yami put his index finger to his lips as he quietly opened the door and walked inside, to see none other than Seto Kaiba sleeping like a baby. The cameraman looked around as Yami walked out, then back inside with a box. he set the box down, then pulled out a bottle.

"Yugi..." The cameraman whispered. "Why are we in Kaiba's room?"

"You'll see." Yami whispered back. "Whatever you do, just keep filming."

Yami took out a bottle rocket and set it inside the bottle. He lit the fuse then pulled the cameraman back. A second later, the bottle rocket launched, pinballing off each of the walls, carrying with it that loud, high pitched shrieking sound! (If you've ever lit a bottle rocket, you know EXACTLY which sound I'm talking about!). Kaiba jumped about a foot into the air as the shrieking sound pierced his earlobes. Kaiba looked around to see the bottle rocket richocheting off the walls, then pulled his covers over his head.

"YUUUUUUGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" Kaiba shouted from under his blankets.

The bottle rocket bounced off one more wall, then shot towards his head, then exploded. The cameraman was laughing like crazy, and Yami Yugi had fallen on the floor because he was laughing so hard.

"TIME TO WAKE UP, KAIBA!" Yami shouted in between laughs.

Kaiba quickly threw off his covers and jumped out of bed, his eyes were blood-shot red from anger.

"YOU DONE FUCKED UP NOW!" Kaiba shouted.

"Damn Kaiba!" Yami laughed. "You look like the Red Eyes Black Dragon!"

_**(END OF TRUE EVENT)**_

_**Back downstairs...**_

_"Today on Maury... Which one of these men is the baby's father?"_

Joey groaned as he changed the channel. "Fuckin' Maury! Cant that decrepit old bastard come up with some new topics for a change!"

Suddenly, Yami Yugi and the cameraman ran at top speed past Joey, followed by the sound of a gun that vibrated throughout the house. Next came a stream of bullets that rushed past Joey's sight. Next was a VERY pissed off Kaiba, chasing them down firing an M4 Assualt Rifle. "IM GONNA FUCKIN KILL YOU YUGI! YOU HEAR ME! YOUR DEAD!"

Joey watched as Yugi and the cameraman busted down the front door, followed by Kaiba and another group of bullets fired from his rifle.

"Damn... Yugi has all the fun..." Joey said, watching the scene in bafflement.

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Seto Kaiba**

"You know what? This is it. No more of these childish games. Yugi has pissed me off one too many times and its about time he met the Reaper of the Cards! Shooting off a fuckin' bottle rocket while I was sleeping? THAT was the straw that broke the camel's back! Yugi... prepare yourself. This time, you meet your fuckin' maker!"

_Ladies and Gentlemen... I think he means it this time..._

**Location : Jungle : 1:14pm**

Bernadette walked through the jungle with one purpose in mind. "Rex.. where are you my sweet little Rexy-pie!" she called. Rex was no where to be found. Suddenly, a pair of beady little eyes were seen from a tree watching her… followed by more and more pairs popping up out of random trees.

"REXY?"

"NOW!"

Suddenly, a barrage of coconuts were being tossed out from the trees, each one connecting with Bernadette's skull. The nurse went down, unconscience.

Rex jumped out of the tree, followed by a group of monkeys. "Thanks for the help, guys!" he said.

Each of the monkeys put of their little paws on their hips and tapped their foot, while they extended their other hand.

"Haha! Oh yeah, right!"

Rex tossed them a large bunch of bananas. The monkeys took the bananas and ran off into the jungle. Rex reached into the brush and pulled out a large tool box. He ran into the jungle with a huge smile on his face.

"This is it!" Rex said happily. "I'm gonna finally get off this island and away from these chumpasaurs once and for all!"

Rex then disappeared into the Jungle.

**Location : Other side of the Jungle : 1:20pm**

Yugi and Joey decided to take a walk through the jungle. Of course, it was one of those blazing hot days that you would come to expect on a tropical island.

"Wow Joey… I cant believe weve survived this long!" Yugi said.

"You said it Yuge. Just two more duelists and it'll be down to just the two of us!" Joey said

Joey stopped in his tracks. "Hey Yugi… wanna fix the competition so we win?"

"Joey, I don't think that would be right…"

"Come on, Yuge… remember the theme of this show… outwit, outplay, outlast!"

Yugi thought for a moment, then Yami Yugi decided to take over.

"**YU-GI-OOOOOOHHHHHH!"**

Yami Yugi stood in front of Joey with one hand on his hip and the other hand hanging down. "Your on Joey!" he said. "You take care of Rex Raptor… Kaiba is mine."

"AWW, COME ON YUGE!" Joey cried. "I WANNA GET RID OF RICH BOY!"

"NO." Yami said. "You know Kaiba wants a piece of my ass… because he's gay… no, but were rivals, so it's only proper that I be the one to get rid of his ass once and for all."

"Alright… ill go find Dino Brains" Joey said as he ran off into the Jungle.

_And so, an alliance has been made. Yugi and Joey has teamed up against Rex and Kaiba… its Pootietang vs. Gazonga all over again!_

Yami Yugi sat down on a rock, crossed his legs, then his arms, then bowed his head and closed his eyes

**(CAMERA TIME)**

**Yugi Muto**

"Kaiba seriously isn't hard to find at all. The bitch pops up either when you least expect it or when you don't really wanna look him. Lately I've taken it upon myself to tease him, so knowing Kaiba, all I have to do is wait, and he'll be here with another plan to try and kill me, only to have me find a clever way out of it. Is anyone else having Wile E. Coyote/Road Runner flashbacks?"

Yami listened to the sounds of the jungle… the birds chirping… monkeys chattering and jumping through trees… the warm wind blowing through the brush… until an unknown sound was heard. This was the roaring sound of helicopter blades that cut through the wind. Yami's eyes shot open as a smile shot across his face.

"SHOWTIME!"

Yami got up, and pulled a backpack out from behind a rock, then put it on. The Millennium Puzzle began to flash, indicating danger.

"What's Kaiba up to now?" Yami said.

Just then, Yami sensed something. He quickly turned around and looked up as a familiar helicopter flew past him. This was the same helicopter that Pegasus and the other duelists had used to infiltrate the Pootiezonga Mansion the night before. The chopper turned around. Yami used his Millennium Puzzle to see who was piloting the chopper.

"I should have known better! KAIBA!"

Inside the helicopter, Kaiba sat at the controls, messing around with the on board computer. Yami Yugi appeared on the screen. Kaiba smiled as he grabbed the tiny microphone off the dashboard. The helicopter had a built-in P.A. System.

"This is it Yugi! There's NO WAY your hocus-pocus magic tricks are gonna save you this time! I modified this helicopter to be my Fortress of Revenge!"

Yami Yugi flipped Kaiba off from the ground.

"You'd better enjoy that, because that's the last time you get away with mocking me!"

Kaiba set the microphone down, then flipped a couple caps off the steering wheel of the helicopter. The caps hid little buttons that were obviously used to fire off guns. Kaiba pressed down on the buttons with his thumbs and let out an evil laugh. The front of the helicopter began to fire bullets straight down at Yami.

Yami shook his head as two lines of bullets approached him. He quickly side stepped out of the way. Yami then pulled out a megaphone from out of his back pack.

"KAIBA! YOU OUGHT KNOW BETTER THAN THAT!" He shouted.

Kaiba picked up his microphone again. "SHUT UP, BITCH! I WAS JUST TESTING THOSE!"

Kaiba starting firing again, this time, he had Yugi in his sights. Yami dashed around, swiftly avoiding each one of Kaiba's shots. The only thing Kaiba was hitting where the trees and bushes. Something didn't seem right though. Kaiba still didn't seem like he was being serious. After another stream of bullets, Kaiba stopped firing. Yami Yugi crotched down and put his hands on his knees as he tried to catch his breath.

"HAHAHAHA! DO YOU SEE NOW YUGI? I WAS TRYING TO WEAR YOU DOWN! NOW I BUST OUT THE HEAVY ARTILLERY!" Kaiba shouted over the P.A.

Kaiba started to program something into the computer database. Crosshairs began to move around the screen, then finally zeroed in on Yami Yugi. Kaiba then turned a dial that was next to the keyboard. The description read, "MACHINE GUN". Once Kaiba turned the dial, the description read "HEATSEEKERS".

"Die, Yugi…"

Kaiba pressed the buttons on top of the steering wheel. Two hatches opened from the bottom of the helicopter. Then, two huge missles shot out from the hatches and headed straight for Yami Yugi. He looked up to see the missle speeding through the air, coming right at him.

"Oh fuck me…" Yami said slowly and quietly.

The missles collided with Yami and resulted in a huge explosion. Kaiba watched the monitor as a tear slowly rolled down his cheek.

"I…I did it… I did it… I FUCKIN' DID IT! YES! I FINALLY KILLED YUGI!" Kaiba shouted as he pulled out a bottle of champagne, shook it up, then popped the cork. Kaiba then started to chug down the champagne in a blaze of victory. However, that was short lived. Kaiba glaced at the monitor for a split second, then spit out all the champagne he drank all over the place.

Yami Yugi stood there, unscatched. His Millennium Puzzle formed a barrier around him, which protected him from the missles.

Kaiba grabbed his microphone. "YOU LUCKY BITCH! LETS SEE YOU ESCAPE THIS!"

Kaiba grabbed the controls and started to fly over Yami. This time, a hatch opened underneath the bottom of the helicopter, and a bomb dropped from the hatch.

Yami's mouth dropped as he looked upwards. He pulled his megaphone to his mouth.

"KAIBA! HAVE YOU FUCKIN' LOST YOUR MIND! YOU COULD BLOW UP THE WHOLE ISLAND!" he shouted.

"WHAT DO I CARE ABOUT THE REST OF THESE LOSERS ON THIS ISLAND!" Kaiba retaliated.

The bomb dropped closer and closer to the ground. Knowing there was no way to stop it, Yami took off running. He ran faster than he's ever ran before. Kaiba however, was in hot pursuit in his helicopter. The bomb hit the ground, which resulted in a very gruesome explosion that nearly wiped out a good portion of the island. Destiny Island now looked like someone took a big bite out of it.

Yami pulled himself up off the ground. "Ok… this shit has to stop! NOW!"

Kaiba circled around the Island. _"WHERE DID THAT FUCKER GO? FOR A SKINNY BASTARD, HE SURE MOVES FAST!" _He thought.

"_YUGI MUTO LOCATED"_

Kaiba zoomed in to see Yami Yugi looking around in the sky. "GOTCHA!" he shouted. Kaiba went full speed ahead at Yami. The machine guns fired and the heat seeking missles were launched. Once again, Yami's Millennium Puzzle shielded him from Kaiba's assault. Yami was ready this time. As soon as the shield faded away, Yami ran over and quickly lit a fuse. The lit fuse disappeared into the jungle.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST DO!" Kaiba yelled over the P.A. system.

"YOU'LL SEE!" Yami shouted through his megaphone. Suddenly, thousands of bottle rockets shot out from the Jungle, each of them carrying that loud shrieking sound. A few of them exploded off the windshield of the helicopter, while another group collided with the body of the chopper.

"IS THAT THE BEST YOU GOT? BOTTLE ROCKETS? IF IT IS, YOU'D BETTER GIVE UP, NOW!" Kaiba shouted through his speakers.

"HEY… GENIUS… YOU MIGHT WANNA TAKE A LOOK AT WHERE THE REST OF THOSE BOTTLE ROCKETS ARE HEADED…" Yami shouted back with a huge grin on his face.

Kaiba looked to see the rest of the bottle rockets screeching there way into the hold where the heat seeking missles where kept at bay.

"OH NO… OH HELL NO!" Kaiba said. He quickly jumped up from his seat, grabbed a nearby backpack, then set the helicopter to auto-pilot. He then opened the door and jumped out of the chopper.

A few seconds later, sparks began emitting from the helicopter, followed by a huge explosion in the sky.

_**On another side of the Island…**_

In one of the trailors on at the CBS Campsite, Jeff tapped his fingers on the desk he was sitting at. He had a disgruntled look on his face as the explosion finally cleared the sky, followed by a burned helicopter dropping to the island.

"Two more days… just TWO MORE DAYS of this bullshit and I can go home!" he said. "What the fuck are they gonna do next, blow up half the island!"

Suddenly, a stagehand busted into Jeff's trailor. "Mr. Probst! Were not sure how it happened, but there's a a giant chunk of the island missing!"

Jeff slapped his forehead. "Just… get…out!"

_**Back on the other side of the island…**_

Kaiba floated back down to the island with the parachute that he deployed just seconds after he jumped out of the now blown up helicopter.

"Yugi… words cannot explain how much I hate your ass…" Kaiba said quietly. "I swear… If I so much as LOOK at you when I touch the ground, I will…"

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!"

A shrieking sound was heard getting louder and louder. "The hell is that?" Kaiba said. He looked down to see another group of bottle rockets heading right toward him!

"YUUUUUUGIIIIIIIIIIII!"

Each rocket exploded around Kaiba! Some hitting him, some exploding around him, and the rest exploding off Kaiba's parachute. The Parachute then caught on fired, and Kaiba plunged toward the ground.

Yami looked worried as Kaiba came down faster than a comet. "DON'T WORRY KAIBA! ILL SAVE YOU!"

Yami ran off the cameras. He returned a few seconds later with a large wagon that held a banner that said, "Crazy Edgar's Manure Farms".

Kaiba landed in the large wagon full of manure. Kaiba stayed down for a good while. He was on the verge of killing the first object that crossed his path. The smell of manure pierced his nostrils and burned his eyes.

"Yugi… I will not stop… until I kill you… with my bare hands… I will use your body as a floor mat to my mansion in Japan… then I will melt your head on my wall…" Kaiba said as calm as he could.

Yami Yugi shook his head as he began to walk away. "Man, I save your life and this is the thanks I get? Joey's right… you ARE an ungrateful bastard." He said.

Without warning, Kaiba jumped out of the wagon and pursued Yami.

"OH SHIT ON A STICK!" Yami yelled as he took off running. Kaiba was in hot pursuit, and this time, NOTHING was gonna get in his way!

**Location : Upper part of the Jungle : 2:10pm**

Rex Raptor was working endlessly on a project to rid himself of Bernadette and Survivor once and for all. He had a steel face mask on and using a blow torch to put the finishing touches on his project. He shut the torch off and lifted his mask up over his beanie-covered head.

"Done… ITS DONE! HAHAHAHA!" Rex laughed.

Joey Wheeler walked up from out of some brush and looked at the large object that Rex had just finished.

"The hell is dat' thing, Rex?" Joey asked.

"THIS… is my Dino-Rocket!" Rex shouted.

The "Dino-Rocket" was a large, pterodactyl looking rocket that took Rex an hour or so to build (with strong determination). Inside the rocket, was a chair, a large tv, a couch, a bed, and a mini fridge.

Rex turned to Joey. "Wheeler… I'm going to follow my childhood dreams of going into outer space. I'm going to live above human kind in a large pterodactyl and start life on another planet! I'll make sweet, sweet love to beautiful alien women and will NEVER be harassed by that fat bitch ever again!"

Joey wiped a tear from his eye. "Good luck, man!" he said.

Rex opened the door to his Dino Rocket and went inside. "Stand back Wheeler… initiating launch sequence!"

Joey took a few steps back. Inside the rocket, Rex sat at his control panel and hit the "launch" button. A female voice was hear through the rocket.

"_**10… 9… 8… 7… 6…5… 4… 3… 2… 1…0… BLAST OFF!"**_

The large pterodactyl suddenly turned upwards, then the thrusters engaged. Fire shot out from the bottom, and the rocket launched into the air. Joey turned away and guarded his face from the impact of the launch.

_**Inside Jeff's Trailor…**_

Jeff sat with his head on his desk. The Duelists has caused Jeff more trouble than he bargained for when he agreed to do this show. From out of his window, the pterodactyl rocket could be seen shooting upwards towards the sky. The same stagehand from before busted into the trailor.

"JEFF! JEFF! YOUR NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS! A GIANT…"

"I… don't… want… to hear it…!" Jeff said with his head still on the desk.

_**Back at the Jungle…**_

Joey watched as Rex's rocket disappeared into the clouds. "…SWEET! He saved me the trouble of having me get rid of him!" Joey said happily. He walked and pulled out a cracked bat from behind a bush.

"Guess I wont be needing this anymore…"

**Location : Outer Space : 3:00pm**

The Pterodactyl Rocket slowly drifted across the universe. The silence of space was soon shattered as loud music began to emit from the inside of the space ship.

Rex Raptor had plugged a guitar into the stereo he had installed in the ship. He let his happiness hang out as he began to sing loudly.

"_WILD THING… YOU MAKE MY HEART SING… YOU MAKE EVERYTHING GROOVY! WILD THING!"_

He set his guitar down, then plopped down on the chair.

"THIS IS GREAT! NO MORE YUGI! NO MORE JOEY! NO MORE KAIBA! NO MORE PROBST! NO MORE SURVIVOR… AND BEST OF ALL… NO MORE BERNADETTE! THIS IS THE GREATED SHIT THAT'S EVER HAPPENED TO ME!"

Rex kicked his shoes off and grabbed out a highly advanced remote control. "Since I'm in space, the satellite I put in gives me access to EVERY FREAKIN CHANNEL OUT THERE! Time to watch the Playboy channel!"

Rex pushed a button on the remote, and a flat screen TV lowered from the ceiling. Rex then began to flip through channels until he got to the one he wanted.

"OOOHH YEAH!" Rex said as he grabbed his crotch.

An adult movie came on. Rex was red in the face, sweat dropping from all around. A scene with two women taking a bath then came on.

"THIS IS IT! HOT GIRL ON GIRL ACTION, BABY!"

Suddenly, the TV began to get snowy.

"NO! NO! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!"

The screen started to clear up to show a studio set that had a desk, a couch, a window with a fake New York City background in it, and a large potted plant.

"What in the…" Rex said, scratching his head. The announcer of the show came on.

"Hiiiiiii… this is Hikari, and its time for everyone's faaaaaavorite day time talk show, 'Bernadette!'"

Rex began to shake his head in disbelief. "What the flying fuck!"

Bernadette walked on to the set and sat down at the desk. The audience went wild with appluades. Hikari took a seat on the couch. Hikari was a beautiful, dark hair Japanese woman who wore a dress suit… sort of like what you would see female lawyers wearing.

"Hi! Welcome to the very first episode of Bernadette! This is a show where we talk about all the gossip that goes in the lives of celebrities!" Bernadette said happily to the cameras.

"…Oh fuck this shit." Rex said. He started to frantically change the channel with his high tech remote, but something wasn't right. "What… WHAT'S GOING ON! THIS BULLSHIT IS ON EVERY FREAKIN' STATION!"

"Sooooo…" Hikari said. "What's with you and Kobe Bryant?"

"I don't know… we went on one date… then he said he was going to Colorado and he would call me when he got back… and I never talked to him since then…" Bernadette said.

"I think there's another woman involved." Hikari said in an accusing voice.

"Yeah, well whatever. I've got a new man now! The sexiest Duelist in the world!" Bernadette said turning red in the face.

"OH MY GOD!" Hikari squealed. "YOUR DATING MARIK ISHTAR!"

"What! EWWWWWW… NO! You find a purple, short sleeve hooded shirt sexy! EWWWWW!" Bernadette said. "I'm talking about…."

"Yugi? Joey? Kaiba? Oh my god they make me melt!" Hikari said.

"Well, I wont lie to you, I have slept with all three of them…"

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" the crowd bellowed.

"Your such a slut, Bernadette…" Hikari said. Bernadette turned red in the face.

Rex slapped his forehead and shook his head. "SHES NOT JUST A SLUT! SHES A DIRTY SLUT! Is this the kind of garbage people watch on TV nowadays!"

"ANYWAYS, My Duelist… my boyfriend… is REX RAPTOR!"

The crowd went crazy as a giant picture of Rex dropped down beside Bernadette and Hikari.

Rex's right eye began to twitch from anger.

"But… Rex Raptor… isn't he a washed up loser?" Hikari said.

"KISS MY JURASSIC ASS, YOU BITCH-A-SAUR!" Rex shouted at the tv.

"Well, maybe… but he's MY washed up loser!" Bernadette said.

"I AM NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND YOU FAT UGLY BITCH! I DON'T EVEN LIKE YOU!" Rex shouted.

Bernadette pulled out a remote and began showing pictures on the TV.

"Here we are sitting by the beach…" The beach picture was a picture of Rex trying to keep Bernadette a bay with a pitch fork.

"Here we are about to have wild monkey sex in the spa…" The next picture was of Rex jumping out of the spa and Bernadette grabbing his swimming trunks to keep him inside.

"And finally, us confessing our love under the moon light" The final picture was after a tribal council, Bernadette pulling Rex into some bushes.

"Wow… I wish I had a Duelist boyfriend… maybe ill get with Joey!" Hikari said in a seductive voice.

"OH FUCK NO! GET WITH ME! I WOULDN'T WANNA BE SEEN DEAD WITH THAT COW OF A NURSE!" Rex shouted at the TV.

"Well… that's all the time we have for today's show! See you next time!" Bernadette said.

"BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Bernadette and Hikari said as they both waved to the cameras. The audience cheered and clapped as the credits rolled.

_**This episode of "Bernadette!" was filmed live at the basement of Rex Raptor's space ship!**_

Rex's eyes widened and his skin turned pale at the mention of this announcement. "_You have GOT to be fuckin' kidding me…" _Rex said in a monotone voice. Suddenly, a saw blade plundged through the middle of the floor of the space ship. It began to saw a large hole through the floor. Rex shot around as he noticed the floor about to give way.

"No… NO…. NOOOOOOO!" Rex shouted.

The circular part of the floor that was cut fell through, and Bernadette climbed through the hole. "Hey baby! Did you see the show?"

Rex jumped out of his seat and slowly backed up until he was against a wall. "How… HOW DID YOU GET HERE? I THOUGHT THOSE MONKEYS AND I KNOCKED YOUR ASS OUT?"

"I recover fast." Bernadette said. "Now… how about some intergalactic sex?"

"HOW 'BOUT NOT!"

Rex ran towards Bernadette and tried to slide under her legs, but he made it too obvious. As Rex began to slide, Bernadette dropped down, landing on Rex's stomach.

Rex's face turned red, then purple as all Bernadette's weight was on him.

"Cant… Breathe…" Rex struggled to say.

"GOTCHA HONEY! NOW YOURE ALL MINE!" Bernadette said seductively.

"O…K… OK… I… GIVE… UP… I… WANNA… GIVE YOU… YOUR… ENGAGEMENT… RING…" Rex said, about to lose conscienceness.

"OOOOOHHH REXY PIE!" Bernadette squealed. She quickly got of Rex, who quickly jumped up and started gasping for air. As soon as his skin tone turned back to normal, Rex turned to Bernadette. "Ready for your ring!" he asked. She happily nodded.

Rex ran up to her, pulled out a tube of pepper spray, and maced Bernadette. Bernadette dropped to her knees rubbing her eyes.

Rex then grabbed his backpack and guitar and ran to the back of the ship.

"TIL DEATH DO US PART, YOU FUCKIN WOOLY MAMMOTH!"

He pounded the wall, which revealed another small control panel. _"I knew I installed this for a reason!" _Rex thought.

A small, spherical pod emerged from the back of the space ship. The words "ESCAPE POD" was written on it. Rex jumped inside, and quickly tapped some keys on his keyboard. The escape pod shot out of the ship and back towards earth, closing the back doors of the Dino Rocket.

The escape pod plundged like a comet towards the earth, til It finally landed in an ocean. Rex opened the top and looked around. There was nothing but water in every direction.

"No land… but its not a total loss… there is NO WAY that fat bitch can find me out here!" Rex said happily. Suddenly, shark fins popped out of the water and began to circle Rex's escape pod.

"GREAT GLOBS OF SHIT!" Rex shouted as he dropped back into the pod and shut the doors.

_**5 days later…**_

Rex's escape pod landed on a tiny island that had two palm trees and a couple bushes. Rex woke up, then climbed out of the pod and onto the island.

"Why… why me… all I ever wanted was to be… the world's greatest Duelist… and make love to an asian girl… IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK FOR?" Rex cried. He was week from not having anything to eat. He took a few steps, then collapsed on the ground. A few moments later, tropical music began to play. Rex opened his eyes a little. "What… what is that…?"

Suddenly, four beautiful women walked out of the bushes, each wearing a tight, sexy, dress like suit. The colors were red, orange, purple, and blue. They each picked Rex up and sang,

"_Wanta, Fanta, don't ya wanta! Wanta Fanta, don't ya wanta!"_

"OH MY GOD!" Rex shouted. "THE HEAVENS LOVE ME!"

One of the girls handed Rex an orange soda. Rex opened it, then chugged it, spilling soda all over him. Once he was done, he began dancing with the girls.

_**Rex….**_

"I WANTA FANTA… YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IVE BEEN THROUGH!"

_**Rex…**_

Rex's vision began to fade. "What… WHAT NOW! NOOOOOO!"

**REX! WAKE UP!**

Rex's eyes shot open. He was still on the small island, but Jeff Probst stood over him.

"Jeff? JEFF!" Rex shouted. "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO! WHERE ARE THE FANTA GIRLS!" Rex shouted.

"Fanta girls? Is that why you kept muttering 'Wanta Fanta'? We thought you had island fever or something." Jeff said.

Rex shook his head.

"Come on. We've got a special Immunity Challege!" Jeff said.

"Hey… if I get voted off… will you guys take me home?" Rex asked.

"Yes." Jeff answered.

"SWEET!" Rex shouted as he ran toward's the rescue boat. Jeff followed him.

"By the way…" Rex asked. "How did you know I was here?"

"Bernadette told us." Jeff said. Bernadette waved at Rex from the rescue boat.

"…PLEASE keep that fat bitch away from me…" Rex said sadly

The Rescue Boat took them back to the beautiful Destiny Island. Once there, Rex was fed and was given a bath. Rex walked out of the Pootiezonga Mansion with a bat in his hand. Joey walked past him.

"Hey Wheeler… have you seen Bernadette?" Rex asked.

"No… and I don't EVER want to see her fat ass!" Joey said back.

"That makes two of us." Rex said.

"By the way," Joey asked. "How was your space voyage?"

"…I don't wanna talk about it…" Rex said as he walked back into the Mansion.

**Immunity Challenge! PLAY ALONG EVERYONE! KEEP READING FOR DETAILS!**

**Location : Middle of the Island : 8:00pm**

The usual spot of the Immunity Challenge was different. The CBS stagehands turned it into a game show like set. There was a back drop, a pedestal for the host to stand, and pod like pedestals for the contestants. There was even a small audience that CBS picked up at the Hollywood bus stop.

_**And now… its time for everyone's favorite Immunity Challenge game show….**_

At the same time, the audience shouted with the announcer:

_**WIN, LOSE, OR DROP!**_

The audience then went crazy with appluades.

_**Here's your host of this Immunity Challenge, Jeff Probst!**_

Jeff ran on camera wearing a suit.

"Thank you Johnny! Welcome to Win, Lose, or Drop! This Immunity Challenge is simple! Our Duelists… or Contestants, will answer a series of questions. Each question they get right, their pod moves up a level! However, if they get ONE question wrong, they'll drop, eliminating them from the Immunity Challenge! And now, Johnny, introduce our Survivors!"

_**Gladly, Jeff! First, he's a high school student from Domino High School, and he's also won both Duelist Kingdom AND Battle City tournaments, and has also been given the title, King of Games, give it up for YUGI MUTO!**_

The audience went crazy once again as Yami Yugi ran out, waving at everyone, then pointed at the cameras and gave a thumbs up. He then took his position at the first pod on the left.

**_Next, he's also a student at Domino High School, he placed 2nd at Duelist Kingdom, 4th in Battle City, and he's given himself the title, "The Godfaddah of Games", give it up for JOEY WHEELER!_**

Joey ran out as the audience went wild with applaudes. He then did a little dance, and walked up and slapped five with Yugi, then stood at the pod next to him.

_**Next, He hails from West Japan, The Runner up in the Duel Monsters Regional Championships, but unfortunately didn't place in the Battle City OR Duelist Kingdom Tournaments, and he's going out with the lovely nurse, Bernadette, give it up for REX RAPTOR!**_

The audience cheered and hooted, but not as hard as they did for Yugi and Joey. Rex ran out and snatched the microphone from Jeff.

"I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU GOT THAT CRAP FROM, BUT I AM NOT GOING OUT WITH THAT GORILLA OF A WOMAN!" Rex shouted as he tossed the mic back to Jeff. He walked angrily to the pod next to Joey and crossed his arms.

**_And finally, he's also a student at Domino High School, he's the President of the Kaiba Corporation, he didn't enter the Duelist Kingdom tournament, but he placed 3rd in Battle City, and he's also "Yugi's Bitch", give it up for SETO KAIBA!_**

The audience blew up as Kaiba walked on the stage, but rather than do something to appeal to the crowd or take his place at the pod next to Rex, he kept walking. Gruesome sounds of beating was then heard. The audience stopped cheering to look around. Kaiba came back out a few moments later dragging a beaten down Johnny behind him. Johnny was out cold. Kaiba threw Johnny in front of Jeff.

"You need a new announcer." Kaiba said. He walked to his pod, but stopped in front of Yami Yugi. "You see what I did to that jackass? That's going to be you, but a thousand times worse." Kaiba said. He then walked to his pod next to Rex.

"Hey Kaiba!" Yami shouted. Kaiba looked at Yami. Yami pointed his middle finger up at Kaiba.

Jeff looked down at the beaten down Johnny, then kicked him off the camera. Jeff walked to his host pedestal and addressed the crowd.

"We will now begin the Immunity Challenge! And you at home (and reading) can play along too! _I'll ask a question like this… in italic… and in bold **like so. When you see this, don't scroll down at the answer!**_ Survivors ready?"

Yugi, Joey, Rex, and Kaiba nodded.

"HERE WE GO! The first round will be Multiple Choice! Yugi, we'll start with you!"

"_**Yugi... who was the very first Duelist kicked off the Island?**_

_**Mako Tsunami**_

_**Tea Gardner**_

_**Maximillion Pegasus**_

_**Duke Devlin**_

"That's to easy." Yami Yugi said. "C! Pegasus!"

"THAT'S CORRECT! YUGI MOVES UP!" Jeff shouted.

The crowd cheered as Yami Yugi's pod began to rise a level

"**_Joey, next question: what is your name in the Japanese anime and manga?"_**

_**Hiroto Honda**_

_**Katsuya Jonouchi**_

_**Tomoya Hanasaki**_

_**Akira Toriyama**_

Question marks began to rise from Joey's head. "Ummmm… B?" he said.

"CORRECT! JOEY MOVES UP A LEVEL!"

"HOODY HOO!" Joey shouted as his pod rised up to Yugi. "Fancy meeting you up here, Yuge!" Joey said. Yami smiled and shook his head.

"_**Your turn Rex! Who was the very first person to review this fanfic?**_

_**Seto's Sister**_

_**Lord Nysakeo**_

_**HinaFilipina**_

_**MystikDragon**_

Rex gave a sigh of relief. "Phew… an easy one… A!" He answered.

"CORRECT!" Jeff shouted.

Rex's pod moved up next to Joey and Yugi's.

"_**Ok, Seto, who is the author of this fanfic?"**_

_**Shortstack189**_

_**Shortstop189**_

_**Shortdick189**_

_**Shortstuff189**_

Kaiba turned and began to snicker. "…short dick… hahahaha!"

"We need an answer, Seto."

Kaiba turned back around. "B." He said.

"CORRECT!"

Kaiba's pod moved upwards to join the others.

"OK, now that the easy questions are out of the way, now the challenge gets harder. The next round will be mixed questions. Good luck, Survivors!" Jeff said.

"_**Yugi… what was the very first Immunity Challenge?"**_

"Hmmm…" Yami thought.

"It was the Duel Monster battle!"

"Close enough!" Jeff shouted. Yami's pod went up again.

"**_Joey, who is the Network that created this show?"_**

"Uh…"

Joey began to sweat. _"Man… why couldn't we just duel…? I'm TERRIBLE at quizzes!"_

"Uh… Uuhhh…"

"5 second's Mr. Wheeler…" Jeff said.

"UHHH…"

"JUST SAY SOMETHING, MUTT!" Kaiba shouted.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, KAIBA!" Joey shouted. "ITS CBS, RIGHT?"

"CORRECT!" Jeff shouted.

Joey let out a huge sigh of relief as his pod went up a level.

"_**Rex, True or False, There was another show before Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters?"**_

"_This is it… this is my chance to get eliminated!" _Rex thought. "FALSE!"

A loud buzzer sounded. "WRONG!" Jeff said. Kaiba turned to Rex. "Fuckin' moron."

"In Japan, Yu-Gi-Oh! Was the origin of Yugi and his friends, where they dealt with everyday life… and no surprise, gets tortured by Seto Kaiba." Jeff said as he turned to Kaiba

Kaiba gave a thumbs up to Jeff along with a huge grin.

"The second season is Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters… which is the first season out here in America." Jeff explained.

"Look, I didn't ask for a lecture!" Rex shouted. Suddenly, a hole opened up in the ground and Rex's pod revealed trap doors that were underneath him. Rex dropped down and into the hole.

"WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK?" He screamed as he fell through.

"Theres a reason this is called Win, Lose, or Drop!" Jeff shouted.

"_**Moving right along, Seto, what is the name of this fanfic?"**_

Kaiba crossed his arms, bowed his head, and closed his eyes.

"Well… when it first debuted, it was called Survivor! Yu-Gi-Oh! Style, however, it was removed because of a scene with Rex Raptor talking to a girl in a chat room (which is still a stupid reason to remove something) but a month later, it was put up again as Survivor! Duelist Style!… Sooo… Which answer are you looking for!"

"THAT IS CORRECT! AND THAT WAS A TRICK QUESTION TOO! KAIBA MOVES UP TWO LEVELS!"

Kaiba held up his middle finger at Yugi and Joey as his pod rose a level over them.

"THAT KAIBA!" Joey said angrily.

"Don't worry Joey." Yami said. "We'll catch him."

"_**Yugi… what is the name of Bakura's favorite card?"**_

_**Earl of Demise**_

_**Hane-Hane**_

_**Sangan**_

_**Change of Heart**_

"D. Change of Heart." Yami Yugi said.

"Correct!"

Yami's pod moved up to Kaiba's level.

"_**Joey…What does Yugi always tell you to believe in?"**_

Joey smiled. "That's easy! If it weren't for this, I would be nothing…"

"And you still are." Kaiba shouted.

"DON'T MAKE ME COME UP THERE AND FUCK YOU UP, RICH BOY!" Joey shouted. "Anyways, it's the Heart of the Cards!"

"CORRECT!"

Joey's pod moved up.

"_**Seto… how tall is Yugi?"**_

"WHAT THE HELL KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT!" Kaiba shouted.

"Yeah Seto! How tall am I" Yami said with a smile on his face.

"Like I give a shit how tall this sack of crap is! He's what, 5'0?" Kaiba said.

A loud buzzer sounded. "WRONG!" Jeff said.

"WHAT?" Kaiba shouted.

"Yugi is actually 5'3." Jeff said.

"YOU HAVE GOT TO BE… AAAAAHHHHH!" Kaiba shouted as he fell through the trap door under his pod.

Little Yugi's transparent Image appeared before Yami. "That's YOUR height." He said.

"Yeah… and?" Yami said.

"I thought you were 5'2?" Yugi asked.

"No… I thought you knew that I was…"

"_**Yugi… How many review does this fan fic have so far?"**_

"5'3" Yami said, finishing his sentence.

A loud buzzer sounded.

"WRONG!" Jeff shouted.

"What! HEY WAIT A SECOND, I DIDN'T MEAN…"

"The correct answer was 54! 54 reviews!"

"WAIT A SECOND PROBST! HANG ON!"

The trap doors opened and Yami Yugi fell through. "YUGI, IM GOING TO GET YOU FOR THIS…!" he shouted.

"Joey Wheeler is the winner!" Jeff shouted.

"HOODY HOO!" Joey said as he did a little victory dance. The audience went crazy with cheers and applauds.

"We'll see you all tonight for our Immunity Challenge! Take care! GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE!"

Jeff and Joey waved at the cameras as the audience cheered and applauded.

_**Tonight's Immunity Challenge was sponcered by…**_

"DON'T YOU FUCKIN DARE!" Jeff shouted.

_**Never mind…**_

**Location : Tribal Council : 11:14pm**

Yami Yugi, Joey, Rex, and Kaiba holding their torches. stood before Jeff at the Tribal Council.

"Ok guys… were coming down to the wired as you can see… time for another one of you to go. Remember, since Joey won the Immunity Challenge, he cannot be voted off the island." Jeff said.

Rex was estatic. This was his chance to go home and be rid of Bernadette once and for all.

Yugi and Joey each shot smiles at each other.

"Get to voting." Jeff said.

Yami Yugi walked to the vote box, wrote down a name, then came back. Next was Kaiba, then Joey, then Rex.

Jeff pulled out the votes and read them off. "One vote for Kaiba… two votes for Kaiba… one vote for Rex… and one vote for Yugi. Ok Seto, please bring me your torch."

"WHAT? WHAT THE SHIT?" Rex shouted.

Kaiba, not the least bit upset, handed Jeff his torch. Jeff doused the torch and looked at Kaiba.

"Seto, you don't seem to be angry in the least… aren't you gonna… you know… go beserk and threaten to kill Yugi?" Jeff said.

"Nope. Why should I care? I mean, I'm a fuckin Millionaire, I've got one of the biggest companies in the world, so I don't really care about 3 million extra dollars. I make that in a fuckin minute. And as for those cards… well, that's a whole 'nother story. Now if you'll excuse me, ive got a company to run."

Kaiba said as he walked off. He stopped in front of Yugi and whispered. _"Just because I'm off the show doesn't mean your ass is off the hook. You'd better sleep with one eye open, bitch."_

Yami returned the bone chilling threat by flipping Kaiba off.

Kaiba made a quick phone call on his cell phone, and a Kaiba Corp helicopter appeared a few minutes later. Mokuba was in the passenger seat, waving from above. A rope ladder dropped as Kaiba grabbed hold of it. The Helicopter began to take off with Kaiba still hanging from it.

"YOU BITCHES HAVENT HEARD THE LAST OF ME! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!"

Soon, Kaiba was out of sight. Jeff, Yugi, Joey, and Rex watched as the Kaiba and the helicopter disappeared into the night. Jeff turned to address Yugi, Joey, and Rex.

"Ok guys, the next episode will sadly be the final episode…"

"YES! OH HALLELUJAH DAY!" Rex shouted.

"So be ready, because tomorrow's challenge will be NOTHING like you've faced before."

Yami Yugi smiled as the familiar Yu-Gi-Oh! Theme music began to play. "Don't worry. We live for this shit! Right Joey?"

"Damn straight!" Joey said.

"IF THIS IS THE LAST EPISODE, THEN IM GONNA GIVE IT MY ALL!" Rex shouted. "MIGHT AS WELL GO OUT WITH A BANG!"

"Alright then, Pootiezongas… please return to your camp. We'll see you tomorrow." Jeff said. They all split up from the Tribal Council.

**Location : Pootiezonga Mansion : 2:28am**

Yugi, Joey, and Rex was in a deep sleep. Suddenly, the mini-mansion began to shake like crazy. Each of them woke up.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!" Joey shouted.

"JOEY! REX! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!" Yami shouted.

"WAY AHEAD OF YOU!" Rex shouted as he ran out the front door.

Yami, Joey, and Rex ran outside, only to see the Kaiba Corp. Helicopter with a huge claw and chain dangling from the bottom. The claw had a grip on the mansion and lifted it up from the ground.

"KAIBA! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING!" Yami Yugi shouted.

"I'M TAKING MY SHIT BACK! WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE?" Kaiba shouted.

The helicopter took off into the distance, hauling the mini mansion behind it.

"That son of a bitch!" Rex shouted. "Where the hell are we going to live now!"

"I am SO going to fuck Kaiba up after I whoop Tristan's ass when we get back to Domino!" Joey shouted.

"Don't worry. Kaiba wont get away with this shit." Yami said as he closed his eyes and held up his Millennium Puzzle.

"MILLENNIUM BLAZE!" Yami shouted. A gold heat ray shot from the center of the Millennium Puzzle and fired at the center of the large chain that was holding Kaiba's Mini Mansion. The chain snapped, sending Kaiba's Mini Mansion plummeting into the ocean. It made a huge splash, which nearly rocked Destiny Island.

"HAHAHAHA! STUPID KAIBA!" Joey shouted.

"That should show his ass!" Rex said.

"SSHH! You're going to miss the best part!" Yami said. He, Joey, and Rex closed their eyes and listen very carefully.

"_damn you Yugiiiiiii!" _Kaiba shouted in the distance.

Yami, Joey, and Rex began to laugh like crazy.

Yami turned to the cameras. "Always remember kids… he who laughs last…"

"LAUGHS BEST!" Joey and Rex finished.

**Kaiba's gone, but don't think we've seen the last of him. As it comes down to Yugi, Joey, and Rex, what kind of surprises will they have in store for us! Find out next episode of Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast: Duelist Style!**

**Sadly everybody, Jeff was right. Next Chapter will be the final episode, but that doesn't mean it's the end of the fan fic. I've got a huge Final Episode blowout planned, and it may take a while to write it all, but please bare with me! Theres gonna be like 2, 3, or 4 more Chapters, so stay tuned! Until then, please R&R. I know it was long, but I hope it was worth the wait!**


	16. Series Finale

This is it… the Grand Finale is upon us! I thank you all for your support. Be on the look out for the follow up story! Lets jump right into it!

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! nor do I own Survivor

**Location : Kaiba Corporation : Town of Domino : 10:45pm**

Mokuba walked around the Kaiba Corporation looking for his brother. He stopped at a random worker.

"Hey, Isono… have you seen my brother?" Mokuba asked. Isono turned to Mokuba. "Your brother is in his top secret base at this moment."

"Of course…" Mokuba said. He walked to the elevator, then pressed the level 13 button. This lead to the floor of Kaiba's personal office. Once there, Mokuba walked over toward the book shelf, and removed a book that was titled, "How to Earn $15,000 in a Span of Ten Minutes" Mokuba looked at the book and shook his head. "Gozaboro had some gay ass books…" He opened the book and pushed a button inside, then ducked as a laser shot from the wall.

The book shelf slid to the left, and it revealed a large, metal door, complete with a wall panel.

"PLEASE ENTER PASSWORD" said a female voice.

"Death to Yugi." Mokuba responded.

"PASSWORD EXCEPTED. WELCOME TO KAIBA HEADQUARTERS."

The large door opened, which revealed yet another elevator. Mokuba stepped inside as the large door closed. Down, down the elevator went, below Kaiba Corporation, below the sewers, and below the ocean. Large double doors opened as the elevator touched down as Mokuba walked out. Kaiba's personal base was a large war room, kinda like what you would see in those military movies. Kaiba had his own personal army, complete with advisers, all for the one soul purpose of killing Yugi.

Mokuba walked past all the generals and advisors, only to find Kaiba himself looking over some blueprints.

"Seto… you've only been back for one night and your already working on some big project?" Mokuba said.

"Damn straight." Kaiba said. "This is it. I spared NO expenses… cut NO corners… I even researched those damn Millennium Items Yugi keeps mumbling about… only to build my monument of REVENGE!"

"ANOTHER DEATH T?" Mokuba asked.

"No." Kaiba said. He walked over to the other side of the table he was working on and pulled a tarp off a model he made. The model was of a large airship, made completely of metal and was riddled with weaponry all over. The very top had an area that acted as the control panel.

"I CALL IT… BATTLESHIP DEATHSTRIKE!" Kaiba shouted.

"WHOA!" Mokuba said.

"Allow me to explain, Mokuba… Even though I don't believe in those hocus pocus fairy tales that Yugi keeps talking about, I made the armor of my airship of doom out of Kitchim… the hardest metal in the entire universe! And the weapons on this ship is made by the one known substance that will penetrate Yugi's little Millennium Item…"

"Um… Grandma's dinner rolls?" Mokuba said.

"No… though I should have used those… they are made… from Orichalcos stones."

"Seto, are you sure you should be messing around with those?" Mokuba asked, worried.

"Please… like those things are any threat anymore." Kaiba said. "Construction will begin immediately… now, You go to bed. Its WAY past your bedtime!"

"Awwww, but Seto! I wanna see Battleship Deathstrike!"

"You will see it when it's complete! Now MARCH!"

Mokuba turned and grumbled as he walked back towards the elevator.

"_grumble, grumble grumble, _**MARCH! **_Grumble, Grumble, Grumble!"_

**Location : Elm Pokemon Lab / Johto Region : 11:04pm**

Ash stood outside the balcony of Professor Elm's Pokemon Laboratory. As he stared at the moon, an huge, evil smile wiped across his face.

"Soon… soon you stupid duelists will get your just desserts! Tomorrow… tomorrow is the day!"

Brock joined Ash on the balcony. "Hey Ash… I just finished talking to our 'allies'. They said they could start the plan tonight if you want."

Ash turned to Brock. "Nah, that's ok. Lets wait til tomorrow. I want to get this on camera… so the whole world can see those idiots fall before the power of Pokemon! Now if you'll excuse me…"

"Where are you going?" Brock asked.

"I'm going to feel Misty's ass while she sleeps!" Ash said as he went back into the lab.

Brock shook his head. "… Why the hell didn't I think of that… oh well… Ash's mom has a nice rack… maybe I'll go feel on her's for a little while! Heh Heh Heh!"

**3 Duelists…**

**Yugi Muto… Joey Wheeler… Rex Raptor… **

**2 Prizes…**

**3 Million Dollars…. Treasure Chest full of rare cards…**

**WHO WILL BE THE WINNER? FIND OUT WHO GET'S THE BOOT TODAY ON…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

**Location : Site of where the Pootiezonga Mansion used to be : 10:23am**

Yugi, Joey, and Rex all woke up really cranky. They used giant lotus leaves for blankets and their backpacks as pillows.

"That damn Kaiba… how am I susposed to wash up today?" Joey said.

"THIS is what we originally signed up for, remember?" Yugi said.

"Whatever. I just want to get this last challenge over with and take home all that loot and all those cards and never look at you losers again!" Rex said.

"Bullshit!" Joey said. "IM the one who's going to win! You hear me!"

"Yeah, when triceratops flies! Hahahaha!" Rex laughed.

Yugi shook his head. "Um, guys? Shouldn't we get some food?"

"Good Idea, Yugi." Joey said.

Yugi, Joey, and Rex wondered through the woods, each of them holding pellet guns.

"Be VEWY VEWY QUIET! WERE HUNTING WABBITS! HAHAHAHA!" Joey said in an Elmer Fudd like voice.

"Shut the fuck up, Wheeler." Rex said.

"You guys! STRAIGHT AHEAD!" Yugi shouted. He pointed at a group of rabbits clustered together.

"THEYRE MINE!" Rex shouted. He took aim and began firing shots off. Missing every single shot, the rabbits began to run away at full speed.

"Yeah, theyre yours alright, with your poor ass aim!" Joey said.

Rex turned and pointed his gun at Joey. "I can shoot YOU, you smart ass bitch!"

Joey pointed his gun at Rex. "Not if I shoot you first, ass-wipe!"

"ILL KILL YOU!"

"ILL PUMP YOU FULL OF BEBES!"

Yugi ran in between his tribe mates, breaking them up. "Hey, come on guys! Spend that energy finding food and not on each other!"

Joey and Rex turned away from each other. The Three boys continued to walk until they saw a beehive hanging from the top of a tree. There were a group of bees fluttering about the hive, going about their busy day.

"HELL YEAH! We can have honey!" Joey said.

"I want some fuckin meat!" Rex said.

"Fruit would be nice…" Yugi said.

"Ok, Ok, Ok, lets do this… Rex can find meat, Yugi can get fruit, and I'll get some honey!" Joey said.

"Ok!" Yugi said.

"Fine with me." Rex said.

Yugi and Rex went two opposite ways, leaving Joey to contend with the bees. He took aim at the hive. "Alright you little bastards! Prepare to share!"

Yugi looked around the forest, trying to find fruit. Yami's transparent image appeared next to him.

"Morning Partner." Yami said.

"Good Morning." Yugi said.

Yugi kept searching for fruit. A smile appeared on Yami's face.

"…How are you…?"

"I know what your doing, Pharaoh!" Yugi said. "You're not leaving me in that puzzle today!"

"Awww, come on Yugi! You like it in there!"

"NO I FUCKIN DON'T! NOW UNLESS YOU WANNA HELP ME FIND FOOD, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT!"

Yami Yugi crossed his arms. "Fine!" His transparent image disappeared. "…Bitch." He said as he disappeared from sight.

"…Takes one to know one." Yugi said.

Yugi looked up a tree to see bananas dangling from above.

"SCORE!" he shouted. "Now all I have to do is climb this tree and…"

Suddenly, a group of monkeys popped out from the trees, growling and chattering as Yugi climbed the tree. Frightened, Yugi jumped down and slowly backed away.

"Um… Partner… think you can…"

"KISS MY ASS!" Yami shot back.

"But Pharaoh, I need your help!"

"Fuck you! I tried to help you and you yelled at me! Help yourself you spoiled little bastard!" Yami shouted from the puzzle.

"FINE, I WILL!

**Location : Middle of the Island : 11:45am**

Jeff Probst watched as the CBS campsite was taken down and was preparing to go back to America. Only a single helicopter stayed behind with Jeff and a few Cameramen.

"Do I have to go back too?" Bernadette asked Jeff.

"Yeah. Once Yugi, Joey, and Rex gets here, their going to have their final challenge to decide who the winner is, and that's it."

"Awww… cant I say goodbye to my Rexy-pie?" Bernadette asked sadly.

"You can see him back at Domino." Jeff said.

"You had better be right Jeff, or I'm coming after you!" Bernadette said angrily at Jeff. Jeff looked out the corner of his eye to see Bernadette backing into one of the helicopters, pointing a silent, accusing finger at him all the while.

All the helicopters lifted into the air, then took off over the horizon, some back to America, and the others to Domino.

Jeff turned to his camera crew. "Ok guys, as soon as the Pootiezongas get here, we can start the…"

Suddenly, Joey shot out from the jungle, running at full speed, screaming all the while. He was holding a beehive full of honey with one arm and firing his pellet gun with his other hand. He was being chased by a swarm of angry bees. The bees avoided ever shot Joey fired.

Jeff shook his head. "What the fuck was…"

"SON OF A BIIIIIIITCH!"

Once Joey was out of sight, Rex Raptor shot out of the Jungle next. He stopped in front of Jeff and the cameramen and started firing his pellet gun. Only two shots came out as it was out of ammo. Rex threw his gun as hard as he could into the jungle and took off running.

"HEEEEEELP!" He shouted as he ran. A moment later, a giant warthog ran out of the bushes and chased after the fleeing Rex Raptor.

Jeff shook his head. "You know… ill be glad when this shit is…"

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"This must be Yugi… lets see what kind of random shit he's gotten himself into…" Jeff said.

Little Yugi ran out of the jungle with an armful of bananas. He ran right past Jeff, dropping bananas as he continued running. Soon after Yugi came running, a group of monkeys ran out from the jungle, reaching their hands into their butts and throwing feces at Yugi.

"Ok… that's just fuckin nasty." Jeff said.

"Should we help them?" one of the cameramen asked.

"No. those duelists are known for pulling stuff out of their asses. They can get themselves out of this mess… get it? The monkeys?" Jeff said

The other cameraman shook his head. "My god…you're sick, Probst! SICK!"

**Location : Beach : 1:02pm**

Yugi, Joey, and Rex sat quietly on the beach eating. They had meat, honey, fruit, and fruit juice.

Yugi had scratches all over him, and his clothes were ripped. Joey had beestings all over him. Rex looked like he came out of a meat grinder. His body looked completely mangled.

Jeff joined them a moment later. "Wow… you guys look like you got your asses jumped by the Saint Louis Rams!"

"Shove it, Probst!" Joey said.

"Yeah, Blow off!" Rex said.

"…Fuckin' Pharaoh…" Yugi said.

"Well, it's a shame we sent Bernadette back to America… otherwise I would have her treat your wounds!" Jeff laughed.

"… You aint funny, Jeff!" Joey shouted.

"Don't mention that fuckin name in my presence!" Rex shouted.

"… Fuckin' Pharaoh…" Yugi muttered.

"Ok, I'm over it." Jeff laughed. "Once you finish your breakfast, I'll explain your final challenge."

"Awright!" Joey said.

"Thank Slifer!" Rex said.

"…Fuckin' Pharaoh!" Yugi said.

**Location : Beach : 2:30pm**

Yugi, Joey, and Rex stood before Jeff. Their wounds was mysteriously treated and their clothes were normal, as if the attacks never happened. The helicopter blades on the last helicopter were going.

"So… whats the challenge, Jeff?" Joey asked.

"Ok guys, this is it!" Jeff said proudly. "This is the end of Survivor! Your final challenge… Were going to leave you on this island."

"WHAT THE FUCKIN HELL?" Rex shouted.

"Let him finish, Rex." Yugi said.

"This is where your Survivor skills come into play… you must build a raft, and sail back to Domino! The first one back to Domino is the winner of Survivor!" Jeff announced.

"HOLY CRAP ON A CRUTCH!" Rex shouted.

Joey had question marks over his head. "So… this is a race?" he asked.

Jeff nodded.

"So this is it then… its every Duelist for himself!" Yugi said.

The cameramen and Jeff boarded the Copter. "Survivors ready? GO!"

With that, Yugi, Joey, and Rex took off into different parts of the Jungle.

Inside the copter, Jeff watched Yugi, Joey, and Rex scramble through the jungle on three different monitors.

"This will be the ultimate challenge for them!" Jeff said.

"HEY JEFF! WEVE GOT A PROBLEM!" one of the cameramen said.

"Whats wrong?"

"Theres a large battleship approaching the island!"

"What!" Jeff said. "Zoom in on it!"

A large blimp sped towards Destiny Island. It stopped right over it. Suddenly, a tractor beam shot out from the blimp and snared the CBS Helicopter.

"OUR CONTROL PANELS ARE JAMMED! I CANT GET US OUT!" The pilot shouted.

"What? Who is that?" Jeff said.

The beam pulled the CBS Helicopter inside the large hold of the Blimp. Jeff and his crew were captured by a mysterious black blimp. The blimp began to lower itself down to the island.

_**Back on Destiny Island…**_

"GO OBNOXIOUS CELTIC GUARDIAN! FAERIE BLADE SLASH!" Yugi shouted.

Celtic Guardian Slashed a row of trees. They each came down and hit the ground. "Cool! Now all I have to do is…"

"YUGI!"

"Huh?"

Yugi looked to see Rex and Joey run up to him. "What are you guys doing here! DID YOU COME TO SABOTAGE MY RAFT! OH FUCK NO! CELTIC GUARDIAN…"

"No you stupid jackass! LISTEN!" Rex shouted.

"Something isn't right… I was looking at a cloud that looked like Kaiba's mom, and I saw Jeff's helicopter get captured by a large blimp!" Joey explained.

"What? Are you serious? Or are you just trying to trick me?" Yugi said.

"I sense danger!" Yami shouted from the puzzle. "I'm taking over!"

"NO! NO YOU FUCKIN'…."

"**YU-GI-OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!"**

Yami Yugi stood before Rex and Joey. "It's that damn Kaiba! I'm gonna whoop his ass once and for all…"

Suddenly, smoke bombs dropped down from the sky and exploded all around our duelists.

Yami, Joey, and Rex coughed and gagged.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!" Rex shouted.

Suddenly, evil laughter was heard all around.

"PREPARE FOR TROUBLE, WE'VE INVADED DESTINY ISLAND!"

"MAKE IT DOUBLE, YOU'VE REACHED YOUR END!"

"Who the… what the fuck was that!" Yami shouted.

"TO PROTECT THE WORLD FROM DEVASTATION!"

"TO UNITE ALL PEOPLES WITHIN OUR NATION!"

"TO DENOUNCE THE EVILS OF TRUTH AND LOVE!"

"TO EXTEND OUR REACH TO THE STARS ABOVE!"

"JESSIE!"

"JAMES!"

"TEAM ROCKET BLASTS OFF AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT!"

"SURRENDER NOW OR PREPARE TO FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!"

"MEOWTH! THAT'S RIGHT!"

Once the smoke cleared. Two individuals were standing before the Pootiezongas. One was a young woman with long red hair that stuck out straight behind her. The other was a young man who had short blue hair. Both of them wore a white shirt with a large red "R" on the front, but the man had pants on, and the girl had long boots. Along with them, was a talking cat known as Meowth.

"Who… or what… the fuck are YOU susposed to be?" Joey asked.

"WHERE YOU NOT PAYING ATTENTION!" Jessie yelled out.

"Yeah! Were Team Rocket!" James said.

"And as much as we hate those twerpy trainers, we hate you Duelists even woise, so we formed a little alliance!" Meowth said.

"HAVENT YOU ANNOYING BASTARDS LEARNED YOUR LESSON YET!" Yami shouted.

"Annoying! Did he just say we were ANNOYING!" Jessie said.

"Well… maybe YOU are…" James said.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY YOU BASTARD!" Jessie said.

Meowth turned to his teammates. "NOT NOW YOU IDIOTS! WE HAVE TO GET THESE MORONS AS ORDERED!"

"Right… the boss said it would be stupid to try to fight them…" James said as he looked over at the Duelists.

Yami, Rex, and Joey had their duel disks activated.

"BACK UP!" Jessie said. She pulled out a gun and fired at the Duel Disks.

"OH SHIT!" Rex shouted.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO!" Joey shouted.

"GO! DARK MAGICIAN GIRL!" Yami shouted. He put his card on his Duel Disk, but nothing happened. Dark Magician Girl didn't appear!

"YOU BASTARDS… YOU BUSTED OUR DUEL DISKS!" Joey shouted.

"That's ok!" Rex said. "Now we'll just have to beat that ass with our bare hands!"

"Yep!" Yami shouted. "Use your duel disks as weapons, boys!"

Jessie, James, and Meowth blew a whistle loudly. Suddenly, from out all around the Jungle, members of Team Rocket popped out, each pointing guns at Yami, Joey, and Rex. Each Team Rocket member all looked the same. They were dressed like James, only they had black uniforms instead of white, and they all wore black berets.

"Um… I'm going to file this under the category of NOT GOOD!" Joey said.

"DROP YOUR FUCKIN DUEL DISKS!" One of the Rockets shouted. "FUCKIN' DROP EM'!"

"You bitches don't scare us!" Rex shouted.

The Rockets began to fire at the Pootiezongas. Yami, Joey, and Rex began to dance around as they avoided being shot in the feet.

"Unless you bitches want holes in your feet, I suggest you give the fuck up." James said.

The Pootiezongas dropped their duel disks on the floor, then put their arms into the air. The extremely large blimp landed in front of them.

**(A/N: Remember the episode "Rumble in the Jungle"? Remember where Yugi and Kaiba's battle took place? That's where this is taking place. The blimp landed in the large empty field.)**

"…Were boned…" Joey said.

Suddenly, Jessie walked up and pistol whipped Rex in the back of his head, sending him to the ground unconscience.

"YOU DUMB BITCH! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR!" Joey shouted at Jessie.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME, YOU SKINNY LEGGED ASSHOLE?" Jessie shot back. She then pistol whipped Joey, sending him plummeting down next to Rex on the floor. Some of the Team Rocket Grunts picked up Rex and Joey and carried them on the blimp.

"WALK!" Meowth shouted as he pushed Yami Yugi. Yami walked towards the ship with his arms still in the air. He walked past Jessie and glared at her.

"Better watch your back, bitch." He said.

Jessie's eye twitched. She walked behind Yami and pistol whipped him as hard as she could. Yami dropped to his knees.

"I fuckin hate Pokemon… WITH A PASSION!"

He finally passed out and hit the floor.

**Geez, what a twist! We thought we were seeing the end of Survivor, but Team Rocket has captured Yami Yugi, Joey Wheeler, and Rex Raptor! They even captured Jeff Probst and the CBS crew! To make matters even worse, Team Rocket seem to be in cahoots with Ash Ketchum and his Pokemon Trainer friends! What is Ash planning? Will Yami, Joey, and Rex be able to fight the cast of Pokemon now that they have been separated from their damaged Duel Disks! Find out next time on Survivor! Duelist Style!**

**Yes everyone… Survivor! Duelist Style! Has turned into an action/adventure. Don't worry… I've still got my off the wall humor in it! And we still have to finish the final challenge! Stay tuned! Til then, please R&R!**


	17. Survivor: Dungeon Style!

Going to try to update asap. Time to see what fate lies in store for Yami, Joey, and Rex! Normally I don't like advertisements in fan fictions, but I must recommend that you all read Lord Nysakeo's Emblem of the Duelist. Its long, but it's a really great story! And if you have the chance, check out my newest story, "The Adventures of Bakura and Yami Bakura". And I still have to update Duel Monster Frontier… GEEZUS! I'm finally on summer vacation and I STILL have a lot of work to do! Oh well… enjoy the second part of the Pokemon Saga…

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Pokemon, Survivor, nor any of the songs I'm using in this fan fic. They all have very caring owners that they belong to!

Yami Yugi began to twitch while he slept. His eyes opened his eyes a little and put his hand on his head.

"Ugh… what happened… Oh, that's right! I got sidewinded by that ugly Team Rocket bitch!" Yami was still a little bit shaken from when he got pistol whipped earlier that day. Something wasn't right though. He looked around and noticed that he was in a dark, dank dungeon. The dungeon was a small room that had two disgusting bunk beds that looked like they've never been cleaned. There was also a bucket in the corner of the room that served as a toilet. At the front, There was the entrance that was blocked by steel bars.

Yami Yugi got up from the ground. He noticed that Joey and Rex was lying next to him, still unconscience from when they got pistol whipped by Jessie. Yami began to shake Joey and Rex.

"Joey! Rex! Wake up! Those bastards locked us up!" Yami shouted.

The two duelists began to stir. "Where… where are we, Yuge?" Joey asked as he slowly rose to his feet. Rex got up, then held his nose. "DAMN! It smells like hot ass and Chee-Toos in here!" he said.

"Heh heh heh heh! So you're finally awake I see!"

Yami, Joey and Rex turned to the door to see Ash, Brock, and Misty standing on the other side of the bars, smiling at them.

"YOU SONS OF BITCHES! ILL KILL YOU!" Joey shouted. He ran to the bars and tried to bend them, but to no avail.

"Try all you want, stupid." Misty said. "Those are made of steel. Unless your Superman, there's no way your going to bend those bars!"

"Then I'll just get us out of here a different way! I SUMMON SUMMONED SKULL!" Yami Yugi shouted.

"Hey… Yugi…" Rex said, crossing his arms and staring at Yugi with the anime face, where his eyes are just a straight line and a half of a black dot was at the bottom of the line, which served as the eyeball. "Those bitches busted our duel disks… remember?"

"Yugi stared forward for a moment. "You know what? I knew that." He said, finally breaking the silence.

"You'd better let us out of here! RIGHT NOW!" Joey shouted.

"OH sure… let me go get the keys. We'll let you out in like 2 minutes!" Brock said.

"Are you serious?" Rex said with hope in his eyes.

"FUCK NO YOU STUPID MORON? DO YOU REALLY THINK A CAPTOR WOULD LET HIS PRISONER OUT WHEN THEY DEMANDED THEM TO? ARE YOU THAT FREAKIN' STUPID!" Brock said.

The Duelists growled.

"Anyways, welcome to your new home! You guys are going to rot in that cell until we release you to watch us destroy EVERYTHING Yu-Gi-Oh! And turn this planet into a Pokemon World! HAHAHAHA!" Ash said evily.

"You'll never get away with this, you 11 year old bastard!" Rex shouted.

"That's right!" Yami shouted. "Our friends will come and rescue us! And when they do, we're gonna kick your asses so hard EVERYONE at Nintendo will feel that shit!"

"Whatever!" Misty said as she made the whatever "W" sign with her hands.

"As we speak, Every Pokemon Trainer in Kanto, Johto, AND Hoenn are Invading the town of Domino, destroying EVERYHING you hold dear! We swore that NO Duelist will be spared!" Ash said.

"So to make a long story short… YOUR FUCKED!" Brock shouted. He and Ash then slapped five.

"WHY DO YOU WANT TO DESTROY US SO BAD? WHAT KIND OF GLORY WILL YOU GET OUT OF IT! ITS NOT LIKE PEOPLE ARE JUST GONNA JUMP ON THE POKEMON BANDWAGON AGAIN! YOU HAD YOUR TIME IN THE SPOTLIGHT AND ITS OVER! FUCKIN' DEAL WITH IT!" Yami Yugi shouted.

"You see, its shit like that is what got you in this mess in the first place!" Misty said. "You don't know how to shut the fuck up!"

"I'm through talking!" Ash said. "You bitches are going to stay in there until I feel the time is right to let you out! Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to LOTS to do before the Trinity Hour! Brock! Misty! Lets get going!"

"Ok Ash!" Misty said.

Two Team Rocket officers came into the area and stood before Ash and company. "Try not to torture them TOO much. I want them at least HALF alive when we destroy this miserable place." Ash said to the troops. The officers saluted Ash.

"SIR, YES SIR!" They both said. Ash, Misty, and Brock left the dungeon. The two guards stood on both sides of the door, standing guard.

Inside the Cell, Joey slowly slouched down to the ground. "Soooo… how long do ya think they plan on leaving us in here?" he asked.

"I don't know… But we have GOT to find a way out of this cell!" Yami Yugi said. He, Joey, and Rex nodded in unison, and then began to think of a way to get out of their jail cell.

_**Day 1**_

A day has passed since Yami, Rex, and Joey were locked in Pokemon Prison. The Pootiezongas were forced to wear "prison" uniforms. They now wore a long white shirt with a Pokeball on the front and said, "IM A POKEMON TRAINER" on the back. The shirt went all the way down to their knees, and had ripples at the bottom. They also wore black slippers, and blue khakis. As nice as all that sounds, they were only given ONE outfit.

Yami Yugi slept on bottom bunk of the nasty beds, while Joey and Rex tossed a beach ball to each other to pass the time.

"Man, is it just me, or is that fuckin' smell getting stronger?" Rex said as he tossed the beach ball to Joey.

"Sorry… I farted again." Joey said as he caught the ball. He threw it back to Rex.

"Figures! Stinky bitch!" Rex said as he caught the ball. He threw it back to Joey.

"So… thought of a way for us to get out of here yet?" Rex said.

"No… these damn bars are to skinny to slide through… if Kaiba were here, I'm sure his skinny ass could slide through those bars!" Joey said as he caught the ball. He threw it back to Rex. Rex caught the ball and glanced over at Yami Yugi.

"Man, Yugi's been sleeping all day! Doing time like this must have REALLY taken it's toll on the little guy." Rex said. He threw the ball back to Joey. Joey caught the ball.

"That Yugi! He's probably cookin' up some bad ass escape plan to get us out of here in that noodle of his!" Joey said excitedly. "I bet he's already dreamt of a way out of here!"

Yami Yugi had a huge smile on his face…

_**Yami Yugi's dream…**_

_Yami was having hot, wild sex with Serenity in one of the classrooms at Domino High School. Serenity was bent over a desk, and she was wearing the same uniform that Kagome (from Inuyasha) was wearing._

"_OOOOHHH RIGHT THERE! HELL YEAH! GIVE IT TO ME SERENITY!" Yami shouted._

"_OOOHH YUGI! OOOHHH YUGI!_

_**End**_

Yami Yugi's smile got even wider as he slept.

_**Day 7**_

A week has passed since the Pootiezongas were locked away in Pokemon Prison. Outside of the cell, the two Team Rocket officers continued to guard their cell, and a squadron of Team Rocket grunts marched back and forth past the cell.

Yami, Joey, and Rex sat on the ground, thinking hard of a way to get out of their dungeon.

"ITS BEEN A FUCKIN' WEEK! WE HAVE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE!" Rex shouted.

"TELL ME ABOUT IT!" Joey shouted. "These fuckin prison clothes are starting to stink, This fuckin cell reeks of ass and fungus, and lets not forget the fabulous menu they gave us… OVER HARD SQUIRTLE EGGS, HARD ASS BISCUITS, AND TEA EVERY FUCKIN DAY THIS PAST WEEK! I SERIOUSLY THINK THOSE TEAM ROCKET COOKS HAVE BEEN RUBBING THEIR BALLS WHEN THEY COOKED THIS SHIT!"

Rex laughed. "Calm down, dude! You're going crazy!"

Joey quicky stood up and pointed angrily at Rex. "NO YOU CALM DOWN! THIS IS BULLSHIT! COMPLETE AND UTTER BULLSHIT!"

"Lets not forget… the lack of shampoo! My fuckin' bangs are starting to straighten out! And im losing my star look!" Yami Yugi said.

Joey turned to Yami. "Shampoo? SHAMPOO? SHAM-FUCKIN-POO! FORGET THE SHAMPOO YOU STUPID ASS CUM CATCHER! WE GOTTA GET OUT OF THIS FUCKIN HELLHOLE!" Joey then turned to the cell door. "AND WHILE IM AT IT, IM SICK OF LOOKING AT THESE LOSER ASS TEAM ROCKET BASTARDS! I MEAN LOOK AT THEM! MARCHING UP AND DOWN THE FUCKIN CORRIDOR, THINKIN' THEY'RE ALL HARD! BUT THEY REALLY AREN'T! THEYRE JUST A BUNCH OF STUPID FAGS!"

Joey ran to the cell door and grabbed the bars. "YOU HEAR ME, YOU STUPID FAGS! **STUPID FAGS!"**

Yami Yugi and Rex Raptor fell on the floor laughing.

Outside the cell, one of the Rocket officers glanced at Joey. "Hey, they're being rowdy again… should be tie them up, duct tape their eyes open, and force them to watch Kiki's Delivery Service?"

The other rocket gave his partner a disturbed look. "DUDE! We're evil, but we aren't THAT evil! I don't care who you are! NO ONE deserves to be tortured like that!"

_**Day 28**_

Joey sat in a corner, curled up in a little ball. He had tears running down he cheeks. "I want my mommy! I want my mommy!" he cried.

Rex was in another corner, also curled in a ball. He was twitching and shaking. "I-I-I-I cant take it anymore… as bad as this sounds, I'd MUCH rather be getting raped by Bernadette than sitting in this nasty ass smell… I think I'm starting to like the smell… NOOOOOO!" He suddenly jumped up and ran up to the bars and shook them like crazy. The steel bars didn't budge.

"LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUUUUUUUUT!" Rex shouted.

Joey wiped the tears from his eyes, then stood up and ran towards Rex. He tackled Rex on the ground and began slapping him.

"CALM DOWN! CALM DOWN! CALM THE FUCK DOWN!" Joey shouted.

One of the guards looked inside the cell and saw Joey on top of Rex, slapping his face around.

"Hey, look…" He said to his partner. "That blonde kid is using Doubleslap attack!" The two Rocket officers began laughing, then slapped five.

Yami Yugi ran to his cellmates and separated them. "Stop it! STOP IT! That's enough! Don't you two see! This is what Ash WANTS us to do! But we have to be strong! We have to keep our sanity and… oh shit…"

"Whats wrong, Yuge?" Joey asked.

"This happened once before at New Year's Rockin' Eve!" Yami said.

"A dance number!" Rex asked.

"EXACTLY!" Yami shouted. He, Joey, and Rex lined up. Suddenly, music began to play from some unknown location

_**(SONG TIME! SING THIS TO THE TUNE OF "Ride Wit Me" by Nelly! Ready?)**_

**Yami Yugi: **Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Where they at, Come on now!

**Yami Yugi, Joey, and Rex: **If you wanna go and have a duel wit me  
We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's  
Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go have a tournament wit me  
Play Dark Magician in back of the Benz-y  
Oh why must I feel this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

**Yami Yugi: **In a duel on the late night, feelin right  
Lookin tryin to spot somethin real nice  
Lookin for a little shorty hot and horny so that I can take home  
(I can take home)  
She can be 18 (18) wit an attitude  
or 19 kinda snotty actin real rude  
Boo, as long as you a thicky thicky thick girl you know that it's on  
(Know that it's on)  
I peep something comin towards me up the seating floor  
Sexy and real slow (hey)  
Sayin she was peepin and I dig the last duel monster match  
So when Yugi, can we go; how could I tell her no?  
Her measurements were 36-25-34  
Yellin I like the way you brush your hair  
And I like those stylish clothes you wear  
I like the way the light hit the ice and glare  
And I can see you moving way over there

**Yami Yugi, Joey, and Rex: **If you wanna go and have a duel wit me  
We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's  
Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go have a tournament wit me  
Play Dark Magician in back of the Benz-y  
Oh why must I feel this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

**Rex Raptor: **Face and body front and back, don't know how to act  
Without no vouchers or boozers she's bringin nuttin back  
You should feel the impact, shop on plastic  
when the sky's the limit and them haters can't get past that  
Watch me as I gas that, 4.6 Range  
Watch the candy paint change, everytime I switch lanes  
It feel strange now  
Makin a livin off my brain, instead of 'caine now  
I got the title from my momma put the whip in my own name now  
Damn shit done changed now  
Runnin credit checks with no shame now  
I feel the fame now (come on), I can't complain now (no more)  
Shit I'm the man now, in and out my own town  
I'm gettin pages out of East Japan, from Mako T.  
Tellin me about a tourney down in NYC  
Can I make it? Damn right, I be on the next flight  
Payin cash; first class - sittin next to Tea G.

**Yami Yugi, Joey, and Rex: **If you wanna go and have a duel wit me  
We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's  
Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go have a tournament wit me  
Play Dark Magician in back of the Benz-y  
Oh why must I feel this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go and have a duel wit me  
We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's  
Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go have a tournament wit me  
Play Dark Magician in back of the Benz-y  
Oh why must I feel this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

**Joey: **yo, I know somethin you don't know  
And I got somethin to tell ya  
You won't believe how many people, straight doubted the Joe,  
Most said that I was a failure  
But now the same motherfuckers askin me fo' dough  
And I'm yellin, "I can't help ya"  
"But Joey can we get tickets to your next duel?"  
Hell naw! you for real!

Hey yo, now that I'm a fly guy, and I fly high  
Duelists wanna know why, why I fly by  
But yo it's all good, Range Rover all wood  
Do me like you should - fuck me good, suck me good  
We be no stud duelists, wishin you was duelists  
Poppin like we drug dealers, sippin Crissy, bubb' mackin  
Honey in the club, me in the Benz  
Icy grip, tellin me to leave wit you and your friends  
So if shorty wanna... knock, we knockin to this  
And if shorty wanna... rock, we rockin to this  
And if shorty wanna... pop, we poppin the Crist'  
Shorty wanna see the ice, then I ice the wrist  
Yugi talk, Joey listen; Joey talk, Yugi listen  
When I fuck fly bitches; when I walk pay attention  
See the ice and the glist'; Duelists starin or they diss  
Honies lookin all they wish - come on boo, gimme kiss

**Yami Yugi, Joey, and Rex: **If you wanna go and have a duel wit me  
We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's  
Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go have a tournament wit me  
Play Dark Magician in back of the Benz-y  
Oh why must I feel this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

Hey, must be the money! _4X_

**Yami Yugi, Joey, and Rex: **If you wanna go and have a duel wit me  
We three-wheelin in the fo' with the gold D's  
Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

If you wanna go have a tournament wit me  
Play Dark Magician in back of the Benz-y  
Oh why must I feel this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

_**End of Song.**_

The two Team Rocket officers looked at each other. "What the fuck are they doing in there!" One of them asked.

"I don't know… but that song sure was catchy…"

The other guard looked at his partner funny. "… I'm fuckin taking my break now…"

_**Day 46**_

Months have passed since the Pootiezongas were locked away. Rex was asleep on one of the mattresses. Yami Yugi and Joey sat on the floor… but something wasn't right…

"Hey Yugi… do you know what today is?" Joey asked his best friend.

"… No… No I don't… I honestly lost track of the days like a month ago." Yami replied.

"Man this sucks…" Joey said sadly.

Then there was silence.

"Sooo… What do you think Ass… er Ash, or whatever the fuck his name is, means by the Trinity Hour?" Joey asked.

Yami's quickly lifted his head up. "Oh yeah… I had forgotten all about that! How does Ash of all people know about the Trinity Hour!"

Joey cocked his head. "Um, you gonna tell me what that is, or are you just gonna leave me here wonderin'?"

Yami turned to Joey. "The Trinity Hour happens once every 20,000 years. It happens on the 6th month of the 6th day of the 6th hour." Yami explained.

"AAAHH!" Joey shouted. "You mean 666?"

"Exactly. And that's not all, Joey… during the Trinity Hour, the Evil Gods will awaken and bestow their power upon the one who recites the demonic chant word for word. He will then be reborn as the El Taco…"

"El Taco! Isn't that some kinda restaurant in America?" Joey asked.

"No man, that's DEL TACO!" Yami said.

"OOHHH… So then, Ass wants to be a Taco?"

"No Joey, thats just what it's called. And it gets much worse than that! The El Taco is virtually INVINCIBLE! No one will be able to stop him... no one but the three chosen duelists."

"Shit… this sounds serious… looks like we have our work cut out for us again, Yuge…" Joey said.

"I know… but what puzzles me is why would Ash Ketchum of all people want to be the El Taco… and how does he even know about the Trinity Hour!" Yami thought.

"Hey Yuge… just out of curiousity… have you dealt with this El Taco character before!" Joey asked.

"Yes… but sadly I don't remember the outcome…" Yami said.

"Your fuckin worthless." Joey said.

"Don't make me fuck you up, bitch!" Yami said.

"I'm just kiddin' Yuge! You know its all out of love!" Joey laughed. "But seriously though… we have GOT to get the fuck out of this jail cell and stop that stupid little bastard before he kills us all!"

"Agreed! Lets put our heads together…" Yami said.

Rex woke up, then got out of bed and stretched. He looked over at Yami and had a shocked, disgusted look in his face. "WHAT THE! WHAT THE FUCK?"

"Mornin' Rex!" Yami said.

"Did you have a nice nap, Rex? Yugi and I were just discussing the Trinity Hour and how we need to get out of here and stop that little Pokemon molesting bitch, Ass… or Ash…" Joey said.

Rex had a blank stare on his face. "Yeah… that's all fine and dandy… but why the FUCK is Yugi dressed in DRAG!"

Yami and Joey looked at each other, then smiled at Rex.

"G-GUYS!" Rex shouted, scared.

**_Day 93_**

Yami had his eyes closed.

"MARCO!" He shouted.

Rex stood on the other side of the cell.

"POLO!" Rex shouted.

Yami walked for like five steps. "MARCO!" He shouted.

Joey saw Yami coming towards him and ran to another part of the cell.

"POLO!" Joey shouted.

"POLO!" Rex shouted after Joey.

"WAIT A MINUTE!" Rex shouted. "YUGI, YOU GODDAMN CHEATER! YOUR EYES WERE OPEN THE WHOLE FUCKIN TIME!"

Yami Yugi turned to Rex. "WHAT THE FUCK! I'M NOT CHEATING YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT! ILL KILL YOU!"

Yami ran at Rex and punched him as hard as he could in the face. Rex went down and hit his head on the wall, knocking him out. Yami dragged Rex by his feet to the other side of the jail cell and threw him against the wall. Rex hit the wall, then landed on the floor. Yami then unzipped his pants and began to urinate on Rex. One of the Rocket officers saw the whole thing.

"DUDE! ARENT YOU GOING TO STOP YOUR FRIENDS FROM FIGHTING!" He said to Joey.

"HEH HEH HEH! Its fun to watch!" Joey laughed.

_**Day 130**_

Rex went into his tweeking stage again. This time, he was foaming at the mouth. Yami Yugi stood against the wall with his eyes closed and his arms crossed. Joey sat on the ground eating Squirtle eggs, biscuits, and tea.

Rex began looking around the room frantically. "I-I-I'M GOING CRAZY! I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE! I- IM SEEIN' THINGS! SHROOMS! DANCING SHROOMS! FANTASIA TYPE SHIT!"

Joey turned around and threw one of his hard biscuits at Rex. The biscuit hit Rex in the head, knocking him out.

"That's the 8th time this week he's been spazing out." Joey said.

Yami opened his eyes. "Did you fuckin' fart again?"

"… Hey, what can I say? Squirtle eggs gives me gas…"

_**Day 189**_

Rex had the urine bucket in a corner. Yami was against the wall again, only this time he was facing it. Joey started to walk over to the cell door. Rex saw Joey out the corner of his eye.

"Dammit Wheeler! Can you turn around for two minutes so I can take a dump!" Rex said.

"Chill the fuck out! I was just going to ask the guard what time dinner is!" Joey shot back.

Suddenly, out of nowhere something dropped from the ceiling and crashed down on the bunk beds! The instantly landed on the bottom, sending the beds to the ground. Rex, Joey, and Yami Yugi jumped. They all ran to the destroyed beds.

The figure got up and rubbed his head. "That… wasn't as bad as I thought it would be…"

Yami, Joey, and Rex's eyes lit up. "TRISTAN!"

Tristan got up to his feet. "Yugi! Joey! Man am I glad I found you! I've been looking all over for you guys!"

"You could have called." Joey laughed.

"Tristan… whats going on out there!" Yami asked.

Tristan looked at Yami in all seriousness. "It's… horrible… Pokemon invaded Domino! They began destroying EVERYTHING in their path! A lot of Duelists tried to fight, but the numbers overwhelmed them! A majority of them got captured! I heard they even captured Jeff Probst and some other CBS guys!"

Joey punched the wall. "DAMMIT! THOSE ASSHOLES!"

"That's not all…" Tristan continued. "Remember Duelist Stadium?"

Yami, Joey and Rex nodded.

"No more…" Tristan said. "It's now Pokemon Stadium…"

"This time they've gone too far! It's the Shadow Realm for those bitches!" Yami shouted.

A tear ran down Tristan's cheek. "It's not even Domino anymore… they've rearranged EVERYTHING! Pokemon Centers… Pokemon Marts… and there's Domino Gym RIGHT in the middle of town!"

"We have GOT to get out of this dump! I know we've been saying that a lot in dis here chapter, but seriously, we've almost been in this place for a fuckin' YEAR!" Joey said.

"So… Everyone got captured?" Yami asked.

"Yeah…" Tristan said. "Which reminds me!" Tristan reached into his pocket and handed Yami a card. "Pegasus wanted me to give this to you… right before he died…"

Rex fell on the floor laughing. "HAHAHAHAHA! THAT HOMO IS DEAD! OH HELL YEAH!"

"HEY!" Tristan shouted. "THAT HOMO IS THE REASON I'M EVEN HERE!"

"What do you mean?" Yami asked.

"Well…"

_**Tristan's flashback…**_

A group of Team Rocket grunts had Tristan, Tea, and Bakura at gun point. The Rockets were leading them to an Alcatraz Island like location.

"You wont get away with this!" Tea shouted.

"Shut up, bitch!" One of the guards said.

Suddenly, an army of Toon Duel Monsters popped out of some bushes and began to attack the Rockets!

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE! AAAHHH!" One of the guards shouted.

"WE'VE GOT GUNS! FUCKIN FIRE!" another one shouted.

Pegasus popped out of the bushes and picked the locks on Tristan, Tea, and Bakura's hand cuffs.

"COME ON! WE'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE!" Pegasus shouted. The four of them ran through the large field at full speed.

"Where are we going?" Tea shouted.

"I'm gathering a resistance on Destiny Island! I'm taking you to my yacht!" Pegasus explained.

Out of nowhere, Jessie, James, and Meowth appeared in front of the group.

"Goin' somewhere?" Jessie said.

"Stand back! I'll take care of these ignoramouses!" Pegasus shouted. James shook his head. "AWWWW… is Pegasus still sad because I went on ONE date with him and never called him since?" James said in a cutesy voice.

"SHUT UP!" Pegasus shouted. "You're a gold digger anyways! I-I NEVER LIKED YOU!"

"That's not what you said when we had phone sex the other night." James said back.

"I'm gonna fuckin puke…" Tristan said.

"GO TOON DARK MAGICIAN! TOON SUMMONED SKULL! AND MANGA RYU RAN!" Pegasus ordered. The Toon Monsters attacked Team Rocket with all they had. The impact was enough to send Team Rocket flying upwards.

"LOOKS LIKE TEAM ROCKET'S BLASTING OFF AGAIN!" They all shouted.

"That was easy…" Bakura said.

"Now, lets get to Destiny Island!" Tristan said.

"THERE THEY ARE! FIRE!"

The four turned around to see a group of Team Rocket Members about to take fire on Tristan.

"Oh fuck me…" Tristan said.

"TRISTAN! NOOOOOO!" Pegasus shouted. He ran forward and shoved Tristan out of the way as a group of bullets went through his body.

"PEGASUS!" Tea and Bakura shouted.

Pegasus hit the ground. With his last ounce of strength, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a Duel Monster Card.

"NOOOOO!" Tristan shouted. He ran over and lifted Pegasus up a little.

"Tr-Tristan… I-I'm not going to make it…" Pegasus muttered.

"No… don't talk like that…" Tristan said.

"P-Please… gather… everyone… the duelists who were… captured… gather… them… on Destiny Island… and … here…" Pegaus handed Tristan the card. "G-G-Give this card… to… Yugi boy… it-it just… might save us… all…" Silence.

Tristan, Tea, and Bakura stood there in silence. Tristan finally darted his sights over toward the Rockets.

"STUPID FUCKING BASTARDS!" Tristan shouted. He ran at the group and beat the living crap out of each one.

_**End of Flashback…**_

"And that's what happened…Tea, Bakura and I went our separate ways after that. Tea went to go find allies to help us fight the Pokemon Trainers, and Bakura went to free the other Duelists. I went to look for you guys." Tristan said.

Yami looked at the card. "Poor Pegasus…but this could defiantly help us… but it's a damn shame my deck is back on Destiny Island and my duel disk is broke."

"That's why I came to get you out!" Tristan said.

"And how are we going to get out of here! Believe me, we tried everything… and we're still stuck in here!" Joey said.

"Simple! We'll get in the way I came in here! Through the hole in the ceiling" Tristan said proudly

"Tristan…" Yami said. "That ceiling is at least 300 feet high."

Tristan slowly looked up, then back at the duelists. "…Opps… I knew I should have brought some rope with me…"

"Thanks for nothing… fuckin moron…" Rex said. "Now will you all PLEASE turn around! I have to take the meanest dump!"

_**Day 236**_

Yami, Joey, Tristan, and Rex sat in the four corners of the jail cell. Rex began to trip out again. He was shaking and foaming at the mouth. Tristan looked over at him. "Uh, guys… whats wrong with Rex?" he asked.

Joey waved him off. "He's been doing that for the past 8 months now. He's just going crazy because we've been stuck in here for so long."

"This is bullshit! We've been in here for damn there a year! If we don't think of a way out of here…"

Suddenly, a voice ran from across the corridor. "GO! BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON!"

Joey, Tristan, and Yami jumped to their feet. "PLEASE TELL ME I WASN'T THE ONLY ONE WHO HEARD THAT!" Yami shouted.

"WHITE LIGHTNING!"

The two Team Rocket officers outside the jail cell turned to the entrance.

"Hey, what the hell was…"

Suddenly, a large white energy beam shot into the room and hit the guard dead on! The other guard was shocked.

"WHAT THE HELL? I BETTER GET HELP!"

Another blast of energy shot into the room and hit the other guard. The two guards laid side by side next to each other, knocked out, smoke rising from their singed bodies.

Kaiba walked into the room, followed by his Blue Eyes White Dragon.

"KAIBA!" Yami, Tristan, and Joey shouted.

"I NEVER thought I would be glad to see your ugly mug!" Joey shouted.

"Ugly? Bitch, you are in NO position to talk, with those flamin' ass clothes your wearing." Kaiba said.

"WHAT?" Joey shouted.

"Kaiba… you came to save us?" Yami said.

"Please. I came to kick some Pokemon ass. It just so happens I took a wrong turn and wound up down here." Kaiba said. "Your lucky I'm in a good fuckin mood. Let me find the keys to…" Kaiba looked inside the cell. He glanced at what looked like an old sheet dangling from the walls.

"How long has that been in there?" Kaiba asked.

"I don't know… it was there when we got here." Yami said.

Kaiba walked out of sight.

"Where's he going!" Tristan shouted.

Suddenly, the old blanket was suddenly pulled down, and Kaiba stood there, staring into the cell.

"You stupid fuckin' morons! There was a hole here this whole time!" Kaiba shouted.

Yami and Joey's mouths both dropped.

"You mean to tell me… we wasted a WHOLE YEAR in this place FOR NOTHING!" Joey shouted.

"You are so fuckin' stupid! You aren't even worth me coming all the fuckin way to save!" Kaiba shouted as he left the room. "COME ON BLUE EYES!"

"So you DID come to save us! Kaiba, you big softy!" Tristan shouted. He ran through the hole in the wall and around the corner and followed Kaiba out of the dungeon. Joey and Yami looked at each other.

"AINT THAT A BITCH!" Yami shouted.

Yami ran through the hole. Joey looked over at Rex. "Raptor! Come on man! Were bustin outta here!"

Rex was motionless.

"REX! COME ON! WERE FINALLY GETTING THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLACE!" Joey shouted

Rex continued shaking.

Yami, on the other side of the cell, grabbed the bars and reached his head as far in as it would go.

"REX! LUCY LIU IS IN THE NEXT ROOM, BUTT NAKED, WITH HER LEGS SPREAD!" He yelled.

Rex instantly jumped to his feet. "OH MY GOD!"

Rex ran as fast as he could, busted CLEAR THROUGH the cell bars and took off running down the hall, catching up to Kaiba and Tristan.

Joey shook his head in disbelief. "Dude… there were SOO many fuckin ways we could have gotten out of this place…"

Yami Yugi and Joey took off running, catching up with their friends.

**And so… after a narrow escape, our heroes set off to take down any and everything Pokemon related, rescue their captured friends, and stop Ash Ketchum before the Trinity Hour! Find out how our heroes fare in the new outside world on the next episode of Survivor: Duelist Style!**

**So what do you all think? Is it getting exciting? Please R&R!**


	18. Trilogy of Error

p)The epic battle of Duel Monsters VS. Pocket Monsters continues! Hey Sakurascorpion19! I never got the chance to give you a shout out cuz you email isn't listed in your profile! You've been a fan, and I wanted to thank you and EVERYONE else for your support! Alright, here's the next chapter!

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Pokemon, Survivor, or anything else famous for that matter. If I did, I'd have my own Destiny Island, complete with mansion, swimming pool, and baseball field…

The town of Domino has been turned into a Pokemon paradise… the Kame Game Store, Kaiba Corporation, Kaiba Land, Duelist Stadium… all famous Duel Monster related themes have been eliminated, and Pokemon rose in it's place.

**Location : Underground Base deep under the town of Domino : 11:32pm**

A snowy tv suddenly got reception. A young man appeared on the tv.

"Hey… Hey! I GOT IT! Twilight Ranger! Get over here! I got it working!"

Twilight Ranger ran over to his friend. "Sweet! Now we can give people the update!"

"Good Evening ladies and gentlemen! I don't want to give my real name, so call me Shortstop189... know what? Just call me 'Trunks'."

"And I'm Twilight Ranger… but call me 'Goten'."

"As you know, Survivor, Duelist Style was cancelled because the world was overthrown by Pokemon!"

"We were able to escape to update you on the situation…"

"Basically, as you all remember, the last chapter ended with Kaiba breaking Yugi, Joey, Tristan, and Rex out of the dungeon." "Trunks" explained.

"From there, the story breaks off 3 different scenarios… Yami's Scenario, Tea's Scenario, and Bakura's scenario…" "Goten" explained.

Suddenly, there was a pounding on the door. "OPEN UP IN THE NAME OF TEAM ROCKET! WE KNOW YOUR IN THERE!"

"Trunks" turned to the door. "FUCK ON A DUCK! They've found us!" he shouted.

"We gotta bounce! Come on!" "Goten" said.

"Trunks" and "Goten" ran towards a wall. "Trunks" pushed a part of the stone in, which revealed a hidden door. "Trunks" turned back to the camera. "Watch the footage we managed to steal from Team Rocket. It'll tell you EVERYTHING you need to know about whats happening to the Survivors! Til then, 'Goten' and I have to get the fuck outta here!"

Shortstop and Twilight Ranger took off running through the hidden door, and slammed it shut. The door soon went back into being camoflauged as a wall. Team Rocket officers busted the door down a minute after they were gone.

"Fuck! They got away again!" said one of the officers.

"Well they couldn't have gone very far! Rip this place apart! They're probably hiding!" said the commander.

Team Rocket began to tear the Underground Base apart, looking for Shortstop and Twilight. One of the TVs that was sent plummeting to the ground began to show a picture:

**(A/N: I'm pretty sure you all know me by now, so you know that that wasn't THE Trunks and Goten from Dragon Ball Z, but the nick names me and my best friend has. Just want to clear up any confusion!)**

**Bakura's Scenario**

**Location : Woods : 10:13pm**

Bakura had a small campfire going. "Geez… why did I take this job… why did I say I would free the Duelists… I have no idea where they are or how I am even going to save them for that matter… Wait… I know! Hey, spirit!"

Nothing.

"SPIRIT!" Bakura shouted.

Yami Bakura appeared before Bakura, rubbing his eyes. "What the fuck do you want… Waking me up like that! I was having a bad ass nap!"

"I'm sorry." Bakura said. "But I need your help."

"Help with what…"

"I must free all the Duelists so that we can meet up with everyone else on Destiny Island and plan on how we are going to take down the Pokemon Trainers and Team Rocket."

"To hell with all of you! What makes you think I would want to help those morons!"

"Because if you help me spirit… I'll treat you to the biggest smorgasbord you've ever seen!"

Yami Bakura looked his hikari up and down. "Ok… I'll do it…"

"Great!"

"…But if I find out you're lying, I'm going to whore you out to gay men in San Francisco!"

"Whatever. Just take over!"

Bakura nodded his head and rose it up a few seconds later. He had his evil smirk on his face. "Well, speak of the devil… I scene total gayness approaching this direction… Team Rocket indeed."

A Team Rocket grunt was running at full speed down a path. "Oh geez, I'm going to be late! I'm SOO late! The Commander is gonna kill me!" he panicked. The man kept running at top speed. Suddenly, he was pulled into the bushes. Sounds of beating were heard in the brush. A couple minutes later, Yami Bakura emerged, wearing a Team Rocket outfit.

"Enjoy your new home in the Shadow Realm, bitch!" he said.

"JOHNSON!"

A Team Rocket Commander approached Yami Bakura.

**(To make things easy, I'm going to refer to the spirit as "Bakura" and to his hikari as "Ryou".)**

"Johnson! Where the hell have you been, Cadet!" the Commander shouted.

"Are you addressing me in that tone!" Bakura shot back.

"The last time I checked, the rotten shit sandwich standing in front of me was known as Johnson! Hence I am 'addressing' you! And do you dare smart mouth your commander like this!" The Commander shouted.

"Bitch, I'm gonna…" Bakura started.

"YOUR GONNA WHAT! YOUR GONNA WHAT, JOHNSON!"

"NO!" Ryou shouted from the Millennium Ring. "We must go along with this! It's the only way we can find the Duelists!"

"But this bitch is ASKING to be sent to the Shadow Realm!" Bakura said with his mind.

"… Swallow your pride… at least until we free the others…" Ryou said.

"… FINE! And u had better not be lying about that meal or your ass is gonna join this twit in the Shadow Realm!" Bakura thought.

"… I'm gonna do…absolutely nothing…" Bakura said quietly.

"YOU DAMN RIGHT YOUR GONNA DO NOTHING! NOW GET YOUR ASS BACK TO THE BARRACKS! WE LEAVE FOR POKEMON PALACE FIRST THING TOMORROW MORNING! GO!" The Commander said as he shoved Bakura. Strongly fighting the urge to send the Commander to the Shadow Realm, Bakura gritted his teeth and walked forward.

"That's right Johnson! You better start walking! I'm like an overdue electric bill! I'll put your lights out!" The Commander shouted as he followed Bakura.

_**A few moments later…**_

A group of Team Rocket Cadets, along with the still disguised Bakura, all climbed into their bunk beds.

"Lights out, you lumpy pieces of Bulbasaur shit! Tomorrow we leave at day's break for Pokemon Palace!" The Commander shouted as the lights went out. Footsteps were heard, indicating he was walking out the barracks. Suddenly a large thumping sound was heard. "OUCH! FUCK! LIGHTS ON! LIGHTS ON!" The Commander shouted.

The lights suddenly went on and the Commander was seen hopping with one leg out of the room, rubbing his other leg. He stopped once he got to the door. "OK, Lights out!" The lights went out again.

Bakura laid on the top bunk of on of the beds. "Fuck I'm hungry… what are you gonna feed me in this, 'smorgasbord'"? He asked.

"Everything your little heart desires." Ryou answered from the Puzzle.

"…can we have… Macaroni and Cheese…?" Bakura asked.

"…Yes…" Ryou said.

"HELL YEAH!" Bakura shouted. A Team Rocket Cadet on the bottom bunk pounded on the bottom of Bakura's bed. "Shut the fuck up, Johnson! Quit fuckin' talking to yourself while I'm trying to sleep!" He said.

"You son of a…"

"Bakura…"

_**The next morning…**_

It was 5:30am when the Commander busted into the Barracks of the Team Rocket Cadets. "WAKE UP! WAKE UP YOU LOWLY BUTTERFREES! WE JUST GOT WORD THAT THOSE DUELISTS THAT WERE HELD IN CAPTIVITY THE PAST YEAR ESCAPED! GET THE FUCK UP!"

The Cadets all woke up and stumbled out of bed. "GET YOUR ASSES IN GEAR! MOVE IT! MOVE IT!" The Commander shouted. All the Cadets were quickly in uniform. All except Bakura, who was still sleeping. The Commander walked over to him and blew a whistle in his ear. Bakura jumped up and darted his sights on the Commander.

"I SHOULD SOCK YOU IN YOUR DAMN NOSE!" Bakura shouted.

"WAKE YOUR ASS UP, JOHNSON! GET ON THE DAMN TRANSPORT COPTER! WE HAVE TO GO! NOW!"

"You dare order me around like I'm one of your…" Bakura then remembered that he was undercover.

"…Sir, yes sir…" He sighed. Still in his uniform, Bakura got up and walked towards the door.

"YEAH, YOU'D BETTER FOLLOW DIRECTIONS, JOHNSON, YOU LITTLE BITCH! I'M A THOROUGHBRED IN A DONKEY RACE! I'LL KICK YOUR ASS!"

When Bakura got outside, he noticed that there were two transport copters. One was destined to go to Pokemon Palace, which was located at the edge of Domino, and the other to Team Rocket H.Q., in the Kanto district.

The commander ran outside and faced his Rocket Platoon. "Red Team, go to Rocket Headquarters! Blue Team, go to Pokemon Palace with me! MOVE OUT!"

All the rockets began to scatter to their respective copters, all except Bakura, who had no idea what was going on.

"WHICH ONE OF THIS CONTRAPTIONS LEADS TO POKEMON PALACE!" he shouted.

The commander shoved Bakura. "GET YOUR SCRAWNY ASS ON THE COPTER JOHNSON, BEFORE WE LEAVE YOUR ASS!"

"You push me again and I'm gonna…" Bakura shouted with rage in his eyes.

"YOU'LL WHAT! YOU'LL DO WHAT JOHNSON?" The Commander challenged.

"… I'll sit on the plane and pout like a little bitch…" Bakura said as he turned around and walked to the copter on the right.

"DAMN RIGHT YOU WILL! I'M LIKE YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S GRAVY, JOHNSON! I'LL MAKE YOU LUMPY!"

Bakura got in and sat down with the Blue Team. The Commander followed him inside as the doors closed. Both Copters took off into the air and flew off into the morning skies, both going different directions.

"… _I swear, if this isn't the right way, bitches are going to the Shadow Realm…"_ Bakura thought.

**Location : Pokemon Palace : 7:13am**

The flight to Pokemon Palace was a long one… mainly because the Transport copter was really slow. Pokemon Palace looked like a giant castle out of a fairy tale book… a Grim Fairy Tale book for those of you who don't like Pokemon. It was a beautiful palace that was Pokemon all over. Water Pokemon swam the moat surrounding the castle. Flying Pokemon flew around it, both as guards and pets. Of course, as seen in anything Pokemon related, there were pokeball decorations all over the place.

Bakura's stomach turned as he caught a glimpse of the castle.

"This is down right disgusting…" Bakura thought. "It's like these damn people are a cult or something…"

The transport copter touched down in the middle of the courtyard. The large doors opened in the back and Team Rocket all scattered outside. They were met by Professor Oak himself.

"Welcome! The master… or should I say my grandson, would like to see you all."

The Rockets all threw up a salute. "SIR YES SIR!" They all said.

Professor Oak lead them through the Palace, with Bakura lagging behind. The group reached the large double doors… which lead to the main room. Professor Oak opened the doors.

"Ok, it's all yours! Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to do." He said as he walked away. The Rockets went inside the large room. It looked like a giant medieval Pokemon sanctuary. A cold chill ran up Bakura's spine as he walked inside.

"Bakura... Thief King Bakura, are you SCARED!" Ryou said.

"Fuck yeah I'm scared!" Bakura said with his mind. "If you see what I'm seeing right now, your little ass would be scared too!"

"Welcome back Team Rocket!"

Everyone looked forward to see Gary Oak sitting on a throne, with Tracey, May, and Max standing beside him. Gary was wearing a red cloak, with a crown on his head.

"The reason I called you all here is because those Duelists may be stupid enough to try and fight us, knowing damn well that they'll lose! But just because we're not cutting any corners, I want you guys here with us." Gary explained.

"SIR YES SIR!" shouted the Rockets, sans Bakura.

"Gary…" May said. "It's breakfast time!"

Gary looked at the Pokemon clock on one of the walls. "Indeed it is… SEND IN OUR BITCHES!"

"_Breakfast…" _Bakura thought, about to drool. "Easy, boy…" Ryou said from the Ring.

Jeff Probst and the two cameramen, all dressed in butler suits, entered the room. They all pushed a cart that was full of bacon, eggs, waffles, pancakes, hash browns, orange juice, and a side of syrup. Ryou's transparent image appeared next to Bakura. "Bakura, look! Its Jeff!" he said.

"Good… that's three less bastards we have to locate." Bakura said quietly.

"So…" Gary said. "Have you all decided to film Survivor! Pokemon Style?" Gary asked.

"Like I've been telling you the past year…" Jeff said. "WE AREN'T IN CHARGE OF THOSE DECISIONS!"

"Well, it looks like you'll be stuck as our bitches for the rest of your lives til you have a CHANGE OF HEART! HAHAHA!" Gary laughed. May, Max, and Tracey began to laugh along with him.

"Pokemon Style? You have GOT to be kidding me…" Bakura said. The Commander suddenly slapped him in the head. "Shut up, Johnson!" he said quietly.

"Forget it!" one of the cameramen said. "Were getting out of here!"

Gary stood up and threw out three Poke-balls. Each one popped open and revealed Charizard, Blastoise, and Venusaur. "Youre gonna do what now?" Gary asked with a smirk on his face. All three men were quiet. "Now…" Gary started. "I want you to shine those Pokeballs we have up on display. We have to make them looking nice for the one year anniversary of Pokemon destroying Yu-Gi-Oh!"

Jeff looked at the Pokeballs. "Whats in there? More Legendary Pokemon?" he asked.

"Not that it's any of your business…" Tracey said.

"But they happen to be the Duelists that we captured!" Max shouted. "Mai Valentine, Mako Tsunami, Weevil Underwood, Duke Devlin, Marik and Ishizu Ishtar, Odion, Espa Roba, Bonz, Bandit Keith, and that blonde hottie… Rebecca…" Max said. Little hearts fluttered over his head.

"Theres a lot of other duelists that are locked in the dungeons in Team Rocket Headquarters, like your little friends Yugi and those other two losers!" Tracey explained.

Gary jumped out of his seat so fast, he knocked his throne over. "TRACEY! MAX! HELLO! DON'T TELL THESE IDIOTS!"

"Don't worry Gary!" May said with a wink. "It's not like these guys are going to try anything funny!"

"Sir!" The Commander said from in front of the Rockets. "We just got word that those duelists have somehow broken free… they probably found the hole in the cell… which I said was a stupid idea to use a sheet to cover it. But they insisted that the duelists would be too stupid to find it!"

"So?" Gary said. "Ash was the one responsible for them… let him clean up his own damn mess!"

Suddenly, Bakura started laughing evily. Gary looked over at him. "Hey! You find something funny!" He shouted.

"Johnson! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" The Commander said.

"YOU IGNORANT DOLT! I TRICKED YOU ALL ALONG TO GET ME CLOSE TO THE DUELISTS!" Bakura shouted. He threw off the Team Rocket uniform and put on his Duel Disk. The Rockets took out their pokeballs and threw them. Dark Pokemon all appeared before Bakura.

"Duelist! You'd better freeze or…"

"Or else you'll do what, you pathetic little drones!" Bakura shot back.

"Go Houndour! Use Flamethrower, now!" the Rockets all shouted in Unison. The dark dogs opened their mouths and fired streams of hot fire. Bakura quickly activated Mirror Force and shot the attacks back at them. The Houndour all fell unconscience.

"Now, its my turn. And were doing this shit my way!" Bakura shouted. His Millennium Ring began to glow, and the floor began to turn into a dark, mucky like substance. The Rockets began to sink into it.

"What the… WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!" The Commander shouted.

"You bitches are going to the Shadow Realm! THAT'S whats happening!" Bakura shouted.

Jeff and the cameramen ran behind Bakura. "Hey Bakura!" Jeff shouted. "Gary and his buddies are getting away!"

"No one can run from the Shadow Realm!" Bakura shouted. Dark shadow hands appeared from the walls and grabbed Gary, Tracey, May, and Max. They all screamed with tears in their eyes. "HELP! OH MY GOD HELP!" Gary shouted. More and more shadows appeared from the walls and pulled them in. The Rockets were sinking fast into the ground. They all screamed, unable to break free. Bakura walked over to the Commander and kicked him in the face.

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NOW, BITCH! THAT'S RIGHT COMMANDER! I'M A PARACHUTE THAT'S CAUGHT ON FIRE! I'LL DROP YOU LIKE ITS HOT!" Bakura shouted. Ryou's transparent image appeared next to Bakura. "HEY! Let me get in on this!" He cleared his throat. "I'm a bag boy in a supermarket with a loaf of bread! I'll smash you flat!"

"Touche, Ryou!" Bakura said.

The shadows cleared and Bakura, Ryou, Jeff, and the two cameramen stood tall.

"Bakura! You saved us!" Jeff said.

"We don't have time for reunions! Free those Duelists so that we may get the fuck out of here!" Bakura ordered. Jeff and the two men grabbed the pokeballs on display and threw them up in the air. They each popped open, setting free Mai, Mako, Weevil, Ishizu, Marik, Odion, Espa, Bonz, Bandit Keith, and Rebecca.

"What… What happened?" Odion said.

"Where are we?" Mako said.

"I remember!" Mai shouted. "We got jumped by those bastard ass Pokemon Trainers! Where are they! THEY PICKED THE WRONG BITCH TO FUCK WITH!"

"Hey!" Ryou suddenly took over as host. "Listen to me everyone! We have to get out of this place and get back to Destiny Island! We heard Yugi and Joey and Rex have escaped and their probably going there!"

"Wait a minute…" Marik said. "YOU saved us! How did your weak ass beat those Pokemon Trainers?"

"You wanna find out you bastard?" Ryou said in Bakura's voice.

"We don't have time!" Ishizu shouted. "We must flee, now!"

"Wait a minute!" Jeff shouted. He ran over to a large save against the wall. Somehow he managed to break inside. "You guys may want to take these!"

Inside the safe were the Duel Disks that belonged to the captured Duelists. They each took their respective Duel Disks, then Bakura lead the way out.

"Bakura, do you have any idea where you're going?" Mai asked him.

"…No…" Ryou said. "Let me take over. I know how to get out of this place!" Bakura said. The Millennium Ring flashed, and Bakura was back in control. "THIS WAY!" He shouted. He lead Jeff and the Duelists to the path where Professor Oak took Team Rocket. They eventually made it to the main courtyard, where There were an army of Pokemon Trainers standing outside waiting for them. Each of them between the ages of 12 and 16.

"What the FUCK is this supposed to be?" Bandit Keith said.

"If you think were letting you get away, you'd better think again!" said one of the trainers.

"I DO NOT have time for this shit!" Bakura shouted. He closed his eyes. The Millennium Ring began to flash bright.

"What the fuck are you doing, Bakura?" Mai asked.

Dark storm clouds began to form around Pokemon Palace. The Pokemon trainers began to look around, wondering what was happening.

"SHADOW WORLD!" Bakura shouted. A large black beam shot down from the sky and inhaled the Pokemon Trainers, pulling them into the clouds. A few moments later, the sky went back to being clear and sunny.

"THAT WAS FUCKIN' SWEET!" Marik shouted. "YOU HAVE GOT TO TEACH ME HOW TO DO THAT!"

He looked back to see Ishizu and Odion giving him a very pissed off look. "Um… never mind…" Marik said.

"Look everyone!" Jeff said. He pointed at a large plane that looked like a Charizard. "Get inside, NOW!" Bakura shouted. The Duelists infiltrated the plane, and Bakura ran to the controls. Bakura hit every switch on the plane, trying to make it fly.

"Damn this machination… how do you get it into the air!" He shouted frusteratedly. The plane finally started. But when Bakura stepped on the gas, the Charizard plane shot not forward, but backwards, into the palace!

"OUCH! SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON UP THERE YOU WHITE HAIRED FREAK?" Bandit Keith shouted. Bakura turned around. "Shut your god damn mouth before you end up with those Pokemon Trainers in the Shadow Realm!" he shouted.

"Hey." Ryou said. "Why don't you try pulling this lever?"

"… Sure, why not." Bakura said. He pulled a lever, then stepped on the gas again. The plane shot forward this time, crashing clear through the wall that keeps intruders out of the castle.

"NOW PULL UP ON THE CONTROLS!" Ryou shouted.

The plane continued to roll forward until it eventually went off a cliff. Bakura, misinterpreting what Ryou meant, push the controls forward, sending the Charizard plane plummeting downwards.

Jeff, the Cameramen and the Duelists began to scream in terror.

"NEW DRIVER! SOMEONE ELSE FLY THIS BITCH!" Marik shouted.

"WERE GONNA DIE! WERE GONNA DIE!" Rebecca shouted.

"PULL BACK! PULL BACK! FOR THE LOVE OF OBELISK, PULL BACK!" Ryou shouted

Bakura crossed his arms, "You know, if you're going to keep yelling at me, I'm just gonna us all!"

Ryou's transparent image got wide eyed. "Bakura… I am SOO sorry!" he said.

"Much better." Bakura said. He pulled back on the controls a split second before hitting the water, saving everybody. Sighs of relief was heard throughout the plane.

"… That got the ol' heart rate up…" Mai said, breaking the silence.

"That was fun! Lets do it again!" Rebecca shouted.

Cameras showed the plane, and a tiny figure being thrown out… guess who it was? Yeah, it was Rebecca (sorry Rebecca fans… I cannot STAND her.)

And so, the plane flew off into the morning skies. Jeff walked towards Bakura. "Hey Bakura… Destiny Island is Westbound… why are we going East?" Jeff asked.

"Because a certain bastard owes me a smorgasbord." Bakura answered.

"Bakura! There's serious stuff going on right now! We can't just…"

Bakura slammed down on the controls and sent the Charizard plane into a nose dive.

"OK OK! WE"LL EAT! WE"LL EAT!" Ryou shouted.

"That's what I thought." Bakura said. He made the plane fly toward a small city. A few minutes later, The Charizard plane was full of donuts. Jeff was at the controls, flying toward Destiny Island. The Duelists were all eating boxes and boxes of donuts.

"HELL YEAH! THAT'S WHAT THE FUCK IM TALKIN' ABOUT!" Bandit Keith shouted.

"We've been stuck on those damn balls for so long I forgot what food tasted like!" Marik shouted.

Bakura was busy pigging out on donuts to care what was going on. Ryou's transparent image appeared next to him. "It's a good thing my uncle owns a donut factory" he said with his arms crossed.

And so, the Charizard plane headed towards Destiny Island, to meet with their friends and allies.

_**The TV monitor began to get static, then snow up, as a new scenario began…**_

**Tea's Scenario**

**Location: Pokemon Tower : Lavender Town : 10:10pm**

Pokemon Tower… a haunted, scary home for deceased Pokemon. At the very top, Ash Ketchum stood staring at the moon, along with his buddy, Pikachu.

"Soon, Pikachu… soon… The Trinity Hour will be upon us… and when that happens… This world will be…"

Misty appeared on the roof, desparately rushing to Ash.

"ASH! ASH! IVE GOT HORRIBLE NEWS! YUGI, JOEY, AND REX HAVE ESCAPED! AND THAT'S NOT ALL! WE'VE LOST CONTACT WITH GARY! WE CANT GET IN CONTACT WITH POKEMON PALACE!" She sobbed.

Ash turned to face her. "It's ok, Misty. They're already too late. Our plan is already in play. There's NOTHING they can do to stop us. Most likely they're going to where that stupid reality show was being filmed. Go there and kill them once and for all!"

"You got it Ash!" Misty said. She turned and ran back to the door. Ash turned back to the moon. "Just let them try to stop me! They'll NEVER stop the El Taco!"

**Location : Mountainous area overlooking Japan : 10:13pm**

Tea Gardner had been really busy gathering allies to help her find her friends and fight the Pokemon Trainers. Once she got enough people, it was time to head to the rendezvous point to plan for a counter attack.

Deep in the mountains, Tea gathered all her allies together.

"Thank you… thank you all for helping us out!" Tea said. The allies she gathered were:

**Sonic and Shadow the Hedgehogs, and Chris (Sonic X)**

**Goku, Vegeta, Tien, Yamcha, Krillin, Piccolo, Gohan, and Future Trunks, Chibi Trunks, Chibi Goten, Pan, and Mr. Satan (Dragon Ball Z)**

**Inuyasha and Kagome (Inuyasha)**

**Naruto**

**Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell, Trowa Barton, Quatre Winner, Wufei Chang, and Zechs Marquis (Gundam Wing)**

**Ken, Ryu, and Akuma (Street Fighter)**

**Vampire Hunter D**

**Vash The Stampede (Trigun)**

**Robin, Starfire, Raven, Cyborg, and Beast Boy (Teen Titans)**

"No problem! We all hate Pokemon just as much as you do!" Goku said.

"I was hired to kill those bastards. So our goals are the same." D said. "Stop that damn lying!" his possessed hand said. "You were lonely and you wanted friends!" D pulled his hand to his mouth. "Don't make me chop your ass off…"

"Who do you think was behind the Nuke All Pokemon . com?" Beast Boy said.

"YOU?" Cyborg shouted

"No… a buddy of mine!" Beast Boy laughed. Cyborg slapped his forehead.

"Anyways!" Tea said. "We should get going. We have to meet my friends on Destiny Island so we can all plan on how we're going to beat the Pokemon group."

"I'll tell you how!" Vegeta shouted. "We'll just fly in there and BLAST them all!"

"Um, father…" Future Trunks said. "I don't think that's going to work in this situation…"

"Plus…" Heero said. "I overheard that Ash kid say something about a Trinity Hour and some bullshit like that."

"If that's the case, we must leave immediately!" Shadow the Hedgehog said. "I know all about the Trinity Hour, and no one is safe if that boy recites the chant!"

"Don't worry Shadow! We can stop it! Right Sonic?" Chris said. Sonic slapped his forehead. "Why the hell did we bring YOU of all people along anyways! I knew we should have waited for Knuckles and Tails… hell, AMY would have been more useful.

Tea stamped her feet to get everyone's attention. "Ok guys, we have to go, now!"

"HOLD IT!" Inuyasha shouted. Everybody looked over at him. "Ok, never mind. I just wanted a speaking roll. Everybody groaned.

"How do we get to the Island of Destiny from a mountainous region?" Starfire asked.

"There's a land bridge that leads to Destiny Island." Cyborg said. "But its on the other side of the mountains… a good 2 day walk."

"Then lets get going!" Tea said.

And so, Cyborg and Tea lead the allies through the mountains. Hours and hours went by. It actually began to rain for a little bit, and the group was forced to take shelter. Mr. Satan and Chris annoyed everyone with games like I-Spy and sing-a-longs. When the weather cleared, it was time to sally forth again.

"I wonder…" Tea thought as she walked with Raven. "Did Jeff Probst know about this Land Bridge?"

"No. It's a secret path that was said to be guarded by a Toll Troll. The Troll cannot be defeated by any kind of attack." Raven explained.

"Then… why are we going there!" Tea said, scared.

"Because its just a fairy tale." Raven said.

Another day passed. The group decicded to have a picnic. Vash took a picture of the happy moment.

Hours and hours passed again, and the party finally made it to the land bridge. The path looked like the entrance to a New York subway, which went deep underground and had a path that leads to Destiny Island.

"Come on! Let's go!" Beast Boy said.

"Damn… my scenario was short!" Tea said.

Suddenly, a cloud of smoke appeared and a Frodo looking being appeared in front of the group.

"Oh no…" D said. "It's the Toll Troll… I guess it really DOES exist."

"There's no way to kill it unless we answer all 3 of its questions…" Raven said.

"Oh, just GREAT!" Vegeta complained.

"All we have to do is answer some stupid questions! Let the champ handle this!" Mr. Satan shouted.

"Grandpa, I don't think…" Goku held Pan back. She looked up at Goku, who simply shook his head, telling her to let him go.

Mr. Satan faced the Toll Troll.

"_Halt! You may not pass unless you answer my questions 3!"_ The Troll said. "_Question one… Vvvvuuuuutttt is your favorite color!"_

"Brown!" Mr. Satan answered.

"_Correct!"_ said the Troll. _"Vvvvvvuuuuuttttt is your destination!" _

"Destiny Island!"

"_Correct!"_

"Wow… Satan can actually do it…" Gohan said.

"_Vvvvvvvvvvuuuuuuuuuttttttttt is the square root of 3,445,393,490,593?"_

Mr. Satan made a blank face. "What the… WHAT THE HELL KINDA QUESTION IS THAT!"

The Troll pointed his hands forward and shot a huge beam that engulfed Mr. Satan.

"Look guys… Hercule is dead…" Krillin said. There was silence for a minute. Then, the Dragon Ball Z crew began to cheer like crazy. Piccolo popped off a cork off a bottle of champagne and began to spray everybody with it. Anime sweat drops dropped from everyone else's heads.

"Ok… we lost one annoying member… who's next?" Vash the Stampede asked. Sonic and Shadow looked at each other, then smiled. They both shoved Chris towards the Troll.

"Hey! What happened?" Chris said.

"_Halt! You may not pass unless you answer my questions 3!" _The Troll said.

Chris began to panic. "Wait, I don't wanna…"

"_Question one… VVvvvvvvvuuuuuutttttt is your favorite color?"_

"Uhh… Brown… NO NO NO, I MEAN BLUE! BLUE!"

The Troll once again pointed his hands forward and shot out a beam, completely destroying Chris.

"OH HELL YEAH!" Sonic shouted. He and Shadow jumped up and slapped five.

"Ok… that's the last of the annoying characters… now we have to be serious, guys." Tea said.

"Then let me take it…" Inuyasha said as he walked forward.

"Be careful, Inuyasha!" Kagome shouted. Inuyasha turned back and gave her a thumbs up.

Inuyasha faced the troll. _"Halt! You may not pass unless…"_

"Yeah yeah yeah! Unless I answer your questions 3! I know! Get on with it already!" Inuyasha said.

"_Question 1… VVvvvvuuuuttt is your favorite color?"_

"Red."

"_Correct! VVVvvvvvvvuuuuuuuttttt is your destination?"_

"Destiny Island."

"_Correct! VVvvvvvuuuuuuuuttttt is your favorite dance move!"_

Inuyasha's face turned. "WHAT THE FUCK! I REFUSE TO ANSWER THAT FUCKIN QUESTION!"

The Troll pointed his hands forward at Inuyasha. "OK OK! I'LL ANSWER!"

Everyone looked forward.

"…_it's the Macarena…" _Inuyasha whispered.

"_What!" _The Troll said. "Yeah, WHAT!" Kagome said with a smile on her face.

Inuyasha growled. "THE MACARENA! THE MACARENA, DAMMIT!" he shouted.

The group all began to fall down laughing. "BWA HA HA HA HA! CAN YOU SEE INUYASHA DOING THE MACARENA?" Tea shouted.

"_You… YOU ANSWERED MY QUESTIONS 3! THAT MEANS…" _The Troll began to inflate, then exploded.

"YEAH! KICKED YO' ASS!" Inuyasha shouted. He turned to the group, who was still laughing. Inuyasha began to get angry. "STOP FUCKIN' LAUGHIN' BEFORE I START HACKIN' HEADS OFF!"

Everybody stopped laughing, then got off the floor.

"Come on guys! Destiny Island is just up ahead!" Tea shouted as she ran into the Land Bridge. The others nodded as they followed her inside.

And so, Tea and her group ran through the Land Bridge, arriving at Destiny Island. Their team will be powerful, seeing as how they lost two of the weakest characters in any Anime.

_**The TV monitor began to get static, then snow up, as a new scenario began…**_

**Yami Yugi's Scenario**

Bullets fired. Fire, Water, Grass, and Darkness attacks flew in all sorts of directions. Yami Yugi, Joey Wheeler, Tristan Taylor, Rex Raptor, and Seto Kaiba charged through Team Rocket's Headquarters, along with Kaiba's Blue Eyes White Dragon, trying to find a way out. But the numbers overwhelmed them.

"FUCK! IF ONLY YOU BASTARDS HADN'T LOST YOUR DAMN DUEL DISKS, YOU COULD FUCKIN BE OF SOME USE!" shouted a frusterated Kaiba.

"Kaiba stop bitchin'!" Joey shouted.

"Kaiba's right though!" Yami shouted. "We have to find something to help fight these idiots!"

"Hey! Check this shit out!" Rex shouted. He pointed at a room that said, "ARMORY". Tristan's eyes lit up. "Freakin' sweet…" he said.

"Come on!" Joey said.

"Wait… since when do Duelist go around wielding guns!" Yami said.

"Hey… this is a fan fic, remember? 4Kids isn't behind this shit!" Joey said.

"Yeah… you KNOW they wouldn't let us get away with all this language!" Tristan added.

"Ok, good point! Lets go!" Yami said. Yami, Rex, Joey, and Tristan ran inside the armory. Another dozen group of Team Rocket members began to charge at Kaiba, each of them with guns and Pokemon running alongside with them.

"YOU BITCHES ARE LIKE A BUNCH OF COCKROACHES! SQUASH ONE AND MORE POP OUT OF THE WALL!" Kaiba shouted. He put two more Blue Eyes on his Duel Disk, then Polymerization.

"GO BLUES EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON!" he shouted. The Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon emerged, then shot a huge beam of energy at the Rockets, blowing them all away.

"…bitches…" Kaiba said.

Yami, Joey, Tristan, and Rex returned, each of them holding assault rifles. "AAWWW YEAH! JOEY WHEELER'S PACKIN' SOME SERIOUS HEAT!" Joey said excitedly.

Kaiba shook his head. "… Lets go!" he said.

Kaiba lead the others through the base, taking out each and every Rocket that popped up in their way. The crew made it outside, where Mokuba was waiting in a Kaiba Corp Helicopter. "SETO! OVER HERE!" He shouted.

Bullets wizzed past them. Pokemon attacks flew past them. But Yami, Kaiba, Joey, Tristan, and Rex continued to run. Yami, Joey, Rex, and Tristan continued to run, occasionally turning around to fire their assault rifles. The Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon continued to fire it's attacks. They all jumped in the helicopter. The chopper turned around and began to fly away at full speed.

Suddenly, at the top of Team Rocket headquarters, a large cannon turned and took aim at the Kaiba Corp. Helicopter.

"_**5… 4… 3… 2… 1… FIRE!"**_

The cannon shot a huge blast that went directly at the helicopter, hitting it dead on. It began to go down fast!

"SHIT! EVERYONE HANG ON!" Mokuba shouted. The Duelists all began to shout as the helicopter landed down in a forest area.

Inside the Headquarters, two Rocket officers watched as the chopper went down into the woods.

"Its down… should we go after them? We should make sure those guys are dead." One of them said.

"Nah. That's Evil Forest. Even if they did survive that crash, there's no way they'll make it out alive. Too bad too… I think Ash wanted them alive… oh well… shit happens." The other one responded.

**Location : Evil Forest : 12:32am**

Joey, Rex, Tristan, and Kaiba began to come around. They were all unconscience from their crash landing.

"You guys ok?" Joey asked.

"Gee, I don't know. I just came out of a fuckin' shot down helicopter… YOU TELL ME, MUTT!" Kaiba shouted.

"You know what Kaiba! I am going to kick your ass right here, right now!"

"You aren't going to do shit!" Kaiba shot back.

"THAT'S IT!" Joey shouted. He charged at Kaiba, and the two of them were on the ground, fighting.

Yami Yugi emerged from the bushes. "There you are!" He said. Tristan turned around. "Hey Yugi! Glad your alive after you jumped out of the copter!" he said.

"I didn't jump out! I got knocked out the back from the impact!" Yami said.

"Hey Yugi, your just in time! Look at this!" Rex said, pointing at Joey and Kaiba, wrestling on the ground. "Dammit!" Yami said. "Tristan, help me separate them!"

Yami grabbed Joey and Tristan grabbed Kaiba. "THAT'S ENOUGH! WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS BULLSHIT! WE MUST GET TO DESTINY ISLAND SO THAT…"

"Shut up, bitch! Who the hell said you were in charge!" Kaiba shot at Yami.

"You know what Kaiba?" Yami said.

"What bitch! Don't think just because Pokemon took over the world, I'm still not going to kill your ass! The ONLY reason I saved you is because I want you to die by MY hands and not some gay ass 11 year old boy!" Kaiba shouted.

"THAT'S IT!" Yami shouted. He charged and speared Kaiba to the ground. The two of them began to fight.

Joey turned to Tristan. "Oh… By the way…" Joey punched Tristan directly in the face.

"OUCH! YOU STUPID ASS SON OF A BITCH! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR!" Tristan shouted as he held his face.

"THAT'S FOR SENDING ME A FUCKIN' TIME BOMB! YOU THINK I FORGOT ABOUT THAT SHIT!"

"YOU ASS! YOU DESERVED THAT FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME WITH THAT FAT NURSE!"

"BITCH YOU STARTED IT!"

"oh that's it! Your goin' down, Wheeler!"

And just like that, Joey and Tristan were fighting. Rex watched wide eyed as Yami and Kaiba and Joey and Tristan fought. It was two fights going on right in front of him.

"KICK ASS!" He shouted.

Suddenly a gun shot fired. The four duelists quickly stopped fighting.

"DA FUCK WAS THAT!" Joey shouted.

A figure emerged from the bushes. "How can we beat those Pokemon Trainers if you are all acting like this?"

Rex's jaw dropped. "OH HELL NAW!"

Maximillion Pegasus walked toward the Duelists, wearing his explorer outfit that he wore on his expedition to Egypt. "PEGASUS! YOUR ALIVE! BUT I SAW YOU DIE!" Tristan shouted.

"Oh no, Tristan-boy! That was really Croquet… disguised as me. I sent him to free you. He's the one who's dead." Pegasus said.

"Well aint that a bitch…" Tristan said.

"Anyways, we MUST get to Destiny Island! The others should already be there! Come on!" Pegasus said.

"Wait! WHERES MOKUBA!" Kaiba shouted. "We aren't going anywhere until I find my brother.!"

"The sorry piece of shit is probably dead. Come on, we've got to go!" Yami said.

"YOU STUPID MOTHER…" And like that, Kaiba and Yami were fighing AGAIN. Pegasus fired his shotgun into the air. "BREAK IT UP!"

Yami and Kaiba got off the ground, but looked at each other evily.

"We'll find Kaiba-boy's brother, then we'll go to Destiny Island! Got it!" Pegasus ordered.

Everyone but Rex nodded.

"Hey! Who put Chief Dances With Wolves over there in charge!" Rex shouted.

"Because he has a gun you idiot, where as we lost ours in that crash!" Joey said quietly.

"…Oh…" Rex said.

"Come on!" Pegasus said.

Hours have passed, and the Duelist walked through the evil forest in search of Mokuba, Pegasus fired his shotgun at any evil animal that attacked them.

_**(You all like all the violence I decided to add?)**_

Another hour later, the group walked to a large, circular field.

"MOKUBA!" Kaiba gasped.

Mokuba laid unconscience on the ground. However, there was a small kitten standing next to him. The kitten had a cute, baby face look on. It let out a little meow that a baby kitten would make.

"AAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, ISNT THAT CUUUUUUUUUTE!" Pegasus shouted.

Rex slapped his forehead. "Dude, you are SO fucking GAY!"

"I'm gonna go pet him…" Pegasus said with a huge grin on his face. "Wait a minute, Pegasus!" Yami said. "I sense danger from that feline."

"What do you mean, Yuge!" Joey asked.

"Look at it… it's almost as if that kitten is standing guard over Mokuba." Yami said.

"OH please Yugi Boy! Its just a harmless kitty-kitty!" Pegasus said in his flamboyant, cutesy voice. He walked towards the kitten. "Let me pet you, you cute little…"

As soon as Pegasus got close enough, the kitten's cute, innocent looks turned evil! It's eyes turned blood red, and the kitten opened it's mouth to reveal sharp fangs. The kitten pounce Pegasus and began to attack!

"AAAAAHHHHH! OH SHIT! OH DAMN! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!" Pegasus shouted desparately.

Yami, Joey, Rex, Kaiba, and Tristan watched the scene in bafflement. A few moments later, Pegasus was gone.

"OH NO!" Tristan shouted. "PEGASUS IS DEAD… AGAIN!"

"Don't be so quick to judge, Tristan." Yami said. "Remember, we thought Pegasus was dead before, and he showed up out of nowhere!"

"So you think Pegasus is still alive out there somewhere?" Joey asked.

"Could be…" Yami responded.

The kitten meowed again. Everyone looked at it as it jumped up and pooped out Pegasus's head. The head rolled over and stopped at the group's feet.

"…Yeah, I'd say Pegasus is pretty damn dead now!" Rex said.

"That's fuckin sick!" Kaiba shouted as he kicked Pegasus's head like a soccer ball. "How the fuck are we gonna save Mokuba!" He said as he looked at his brother.

Joey and Tristan looked at each other. "Yugi… Kaiba… Rex… turn around… we don't want you to see what were going to do to this hairball." Joey said.

"But Joey…" Yami said.

"Yuge… turn…" Tristan said.

Yami, Kaiba, and Rex looked at each other, then turned away. "This had better be worth it you fools." Kaiba said.

Joey cracked his knuckles. "You ready, pal!" He said.

"Lets do it!" Tristan said.

Yami, Rex, and Kaiba stood there with their backs turned. Suddenly, sounds of beating and scratching came from behind them. In between those sounds were blood curdling meows and excessive cussing coming from Joey and Tristan. Yami listened in amazement.

"Um… guys… you sure you don't want my help!" Yami shouted.

"STAY BACK YUGI!" Joey shouted. "THIS IS BETWEEN US AND THE CAT! OUCH! YOU STUPID SON OF A …"

A few minutes later, the sounds stopped. Joey and Tristan were both panting. "Ok… you… can… turn around… now…" Joey muttered.

Yami, Rex, and Kaiba turned to see Joey and Tristan with blood all over their clothes and their clothes ripped and scratched. The kitten however, was nowhere to be found.

"WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT DID YOU GUYS DO!" Yami Yugi shouted.

Joey and Tristan smiled at each other. "Don't worry Yuge… just don't ask." Joey said.

"Damn, that was tough though… that cat was tougher than any high school gang we ever fought!" Tristan said.

"…Tell me about it…" Joey said.

Kaiba ran past them and towards Mokuba. "Mokuba! Hey Mokuba! Wake up!" Kaiba said, lightly slapping Mokuba in the face. Mokuba began to come around. "Ugh… Seto?" He said as he came to.

"Hey… you ok kid?" Kaiba said.

"I am now! Where are we, big brother!" Mokuba asked.

"Don't worry about it… were about to get out of here… thing is, with homo boy dead, were just as lost as ever." Kaiba said.

Suddenly, A tiny bird flew over and landed in front of the others. This bird was different. It only had one leg.

"SPRINGY!" Mokuba said as he ran over to the bird.

"Springy!" The duelists shouted in unison. "Yeah! This is the pet bird I had when I was on Destiny Island!" Mokuba explained. "Did you come to take us to Destiny Island?"

Springy nodded happily. It hopped a few feet, then began to fly. It turned around and signaled to the Duelists, telling them to follow him. Mokuba ran ahead. "Quick guys! Follow Springy! He's going to take us to Destiny Island!"

"Um… should we really believe a bird is going to take us to Destiny Island?" Tristan asked.

"Man, after everything that's happened to us this past year, I'll believe ANYTHING now!" Joey said.

And so, the little bird lead Yami, Joey, Tristan, Rex, Kaiba, and Mokuba to Destiny Island. Once they go to the ocean, the Duelists made a raft and road the waves the rest of the way.

An island appeared in view. "LOOK! THERE IT IS!" Tristan shouted.

"Shut the fuck up, Taylor! You said that about that past 12 Islands we passed!" Kaiba said.

Another island came into view, this one bigger than the last ones. "That's the one!" Yami said.

"You sure, Yuge?" Joey asked.

"Yeah… because there's the area where Kaiba dropped that fuckin bomb!" Yami said, staring at Kaiba. Kaiba simply smiled.

The bird flew into the island, and the Duelists prepared to disembark on Destiny Island.

**And so, Yami, Bakura, and Tea's groups all made it to Destiny Island, and they all rendezvoused. This is it… the final showdown between Pocket Monsters and Duel Monster is about to reach the final confrontation! Who will come out on top? Pokemon, or Yu-Gi-Oh! And their allies! Find out on the shocking conclusion to the Pokemon Saga on Survivor! Duelist Style!**

**Ok guys, this is it! After this chapter, its back to Survivor! See now I need your help. I already have the final battle planned, so please, no advice on that… but I do wanna put in more allies for the Yu-Gi-Oh! Crew, and maybe even the Pokemon Crew… so give me some ideas of who I can use for some allies in the final battle! Until then, please R&R.**


	19. Rise of the El Taco

This is it, everyone. The final confrontation between Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh! Concludes today! Sorry for the long wait by the way. I wanted to wait a while and see how many ideas I would get from you guys. That and I've been busy with other projects and enjoying summer. I wanted to thank you all those who helped with allies for the story. I took all your ideas and TRIED to add them in. My email box had hella ideas, so I tried my best to work them into the story. if I didn't get it, I am SO sorry. Ill make it up to you, I swear.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, Pokemon, Survivor, or anything else that appears in this fan fic.

**Location: Destiny Island : 5 hours before the Trinity Hour**

Two Monkeys sat smoking cigarettes, chillin' in one of the many large trees in Destiny Island.

"Man, I for one am glad those damn duelists are gone! They turned our beautiful home upside down!" said one of the monkeys.

"Tell me about it! And there was something wrong with that Rex Raptor guy. Seriously, what a FREAK! And what was up with that one large woman! I almost thought she was a fuckin' elephant… but I have a few elephant friends, so I didn't want to insult them." Said the other.

The first monkey took a puff of his cigarette. "Man, just be thankful their gone." He said. Both monkeys nodded and relaxed. It was then that a small raft came into view and 6 tiny figures disembarked from it. The first monkey was so shocked he spit out his cigarette.

"MAN, YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTIN' ME!" He shouted.

The other monkey glanced at him. "What? Whats wrong?" He asked.

The first monkey pointed to the figures that got off the raft. "OH HELL NAW!" he shouted.

"Dammit! Lets get out of here!" said the second monkey. The both of them jumped from tree to tree, escaping the scene.

Yami Yugi, Joey, Tristan, Kaiba, Rex, and Mokuba all touched down on Destiny Island. Tristan ran ahead. "Come on. Pegasus said the Meeting place is where the old Gazonga Mansion used to be!"

"Oh… you mean the Mansion that ass face over there sunk into the ocean!" Kaiba shouted as he stared at Yami. Yami had a huge smile on his face, obviously proud of what he did.

"Oh no! They found us!" Mokuba said as he pointed upwards. They all looked to see a Charizard plane about to touch down on the island.

"Oh fuck that!" Rex shouted. "I am NOT going back to that damn cell… even if there was a big ass hole in the wall… that place smelt like ass!"

Yami Yugi cocked his rifle. "We aren't going ANYWHERE! The only place those Pokemon Trainers are going is on a one way trip to HELL!"

Joey cocked his gun as well. "Hell yeah! That's the spirit, Yuge!"

Tristan followed in the festivities. "Lets cap some ass!"

And so, lead by Yugi, Joey, and Tristan, the group dashed off towards the place where the Charizard plane touched down. It was, in fact, where the Gazonga Tribe campsite was. Yami, Joey, Tristan, and Rex began to let the bullets fly. Mai opened the door to see the four duelists firing like madmen.

"SHIT!" Mai screamed as she slammed the door shut. No sooner than when the door closed, a group of bullets collided with the door. Marik opened one of the windows a little bit and began to shout into a megaphone.

"STOP SHOOTING YOU MORONS! ITS US!"

Joey stopped firing. "Hey, was that Marik? HOLD YA FIYAH!"

Yami and Tristan stopped. Rex kept shooting. Tristan slapped him upside his head.

The door to the Charizard plane opened and Mai and the rest of the Duelists stepped out.

"HOLY CRAP! YOU'RE ALL OK!" Yami shouted.

"Good to see you again, Yugi!" Mai said. Bakura (or Ryou I should say) was the last one off.

"Yugi! Tristan!" He said happily.

Yami and Tristan ran towards him. "Bakura! You did it! For a while there, I didn't think you would pull it off!" Tristan said.

"And for a while there I thought you were GAY!" the spirit said from the Millennium Ring.

"OK, where all here… when do we get revenge on those Pokemon Trainers?" Mako asked.

"Soon… Really soon… The Trinity Hour is upon us…" Yami said.

"Must you always be so fuckin' dramatic?" Kaiba said. Yami turned to him. "KAIBA! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WERE UP AGAINST!" Yami shouted.

"You know something, you skinny ass…" Kaiba started.

"YUGI!"

Everyone turned around to see Tea run from the bushes, followed by her allies.

"TEA! ITS YOU!" Yami said.

"Yep! And I brought some friends too!" She said as she pointed to her group.

"Um… who are those guys?" Joey asked.

"ok, this is Robin, Cyborg, Raven, Starfire, and Beast Boy, the Teen Titans, Vash the Stampede, Vampire Hunter D, Ken, Ryu, Akuma, Heero, Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Wufei, Zechs, Naruto, Inuyasha, Kagome, Goku, Vegeta, Tien, Yamcha, Krillin, Piccolo, Gohan, and Future Trunks, Chibi Trunks, Chibi Goten, Pan, Sonic, and Shadow the Hedgehogs." Tea said as she took a really deep breath.

"Whoa, You said a mouthful…" Rex said.

"Its great to meet you all… maybe we stand a chance…" Yami said.

"Hey… Where's BB!" Cyborg asked as he looked around the Island.

**Location : Route 4 : Johto Region : 4 hours before the Trinity Hour**

A large group of Pokemon Trainers were gathered around in a large field, where many wild Pokemon could be caught. Misty faced the trainers, ready to give them orders.

"Listen up! This is it! Today is the day we finally put those Duelists in their places once and for all! Now we don't know what happened at Pokemon Palace, but what we do know is that those damn Duelists are plotting something at Destiny Island, and we will NOT give them the chance to attack! So where gonna hit them hard and fast! Already, Team Rocket is planning an assault on Destiny Island, so were gonna hit them from the air! Is EVERYBODY READY!" Misty shouted.

All the trainers roared and cheered.

"THEN LETS GO!" Misty shouted.

A group of transport copters landed on the field, and the trainers all boarded them. A few of the other trainers decided to use their strongest flying Pokemon and use them to fly to Destiny Island. Soon, they were in the air, and took off into the skies toward Destiny Island!

In a tree, not far from the "pep rally", a green bird sat in a tree. The bird reverted back to Beast Boy. "Dude… this is NOT cool… we don't even have a plan yet and their already about to attack us!"

"Looks like you could use some help…"

"Huh?" Beast boy looked down at the figure on the ground. "You're…"

**Location : Destiny Island : 3 and ½ hours before the Trinity Hour**

**(NOTE: Remember the prison clothes that Yami, Joey, and Rex were wearing? Well they changed. Yami is back in what he ALWAYS friggin wears, Joey is wearing the school uniform… blue jacket, white shirt, blue pants, and "Air Muscle" shoes, and Rex is wearing the clothes he wore in the Battle City/ Dartz sagas.)**

Yami Yugi walked back and forth. He was obviously in deep thought. "Everything ok, Yuge?" Joey asked.

"I'm starting to wonder if we can win this… I mean, they have thousands of those Pokemon Trainers, and theres just a handful of us… even with our allies, I don't think we stand a chance against a head on assault." Yami explained.

"But don't forget, Yugi… I sent some of those blokes to the Shadow Realm." Bakura said.

"I know, but theres still a whole lot of them…" Yami said. "The main issue right now is the three choosen Duelist beating Ash before he becomes the El Taco."

"And who are the three choosen Duelists, Yugi?" Tea asked.

"I'M ONE OF THEM, AREN'T I?" Rex shouted.

Yami stared at Rex out the corner of his eye. "Um, NO!" he said.

"Gee, I wonder… could it have been the same three Duelists who beat the Great Beast?" Mai asked sarcastically.

"The three choosen Duelists are… Myself… Joey… and…. WEEVIL!" Yami said.

There was commotion amoung the group. Weevil laughed evily. "I KNEW IT! I KNEW I WAS THE BEST! BUT WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I WANNA HELP YOU!"

Yami gave Weevil a cold stare. "Bitch, please! I was just kidding! Like YOU would ever be a choosen anything… well, choosen DICKHEAD maybe."

Everyone, even Kaiba, laughed at the comment. Yami grew serious again. "Our situation seems hopeless right now."

"_Hopeless! I never thought I would hear the great Yugi Muto say the word, 'hopeless'!"_

"What the?" Yami said. Everyone looked and saw a two boys emerge from the bushes. The same boys who stole Survivor footage from Team Rocket.

"We came to help!" The other boy said.

"Uh… who the fuck are you two, and how can you help us!" Joey asked.

"We don't wanna give out our real names, so just call me 'Trunks', and he's 'Goten'!" the other boy explained.

The Real Trunks (both future and chibi) and Goten approached the boys. "You cant be Trunks and Goten!" Little Trunks said.

"Yeah! WERE Trunks and Goten! This guy is Trunks too!" Goten said as he pointed to Future Trunks, who was about to pull out his sword.

"Ok, fine! Then call me Shortstop!"

Twilight looked at his friend. "Dude… stop being so damn secretive… its not like someone's gonna stalk you because your name is out in the open!"

"Fine… Name's Andre!" He said.

"And I'm Eli… you can put that sword away now… please…"

Yami walked up to the boys. "Thank you… but even with your help, I doubt we stand a chance."

"Don't worry." Andre said, wagging his index finger. "Eli and I have been busy helping gather allies ourselves! Theres a few on there way now. "

"_Yeah, like us!"_

The group all turned to see a few females with duel disks standing behind them. Eli walked over to them.

"This is 'HinaFilipina', 'Atemu's Lover', 'Sakura Scorpion', and 'Cutepuppy'!" He said.

An Anime sweatdrop dropped down from Kaiba's head. "We need Duelists… and we get two punks and a group of cheerleaders…" Kaiba said, complaining. He looked to see Sakura Scorpion staring at him with stars in her eyes next to him. He took a step back.

"WHAT!" He yelled. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT?"

"You… are … so… HOT!" Sakura said. Andre took Sakura and pulled her away. "Hey… you saw what he tries to do to Yugi on TV… just imagine what he'll do to you!"

Yami looked around at the group. "Well… we CAN fight off the Pokemon Trainers, but a head in a head on assault, we'd get our asses kicked… so I suggest we…"

Suddenly, 3 smoke bombs landed in front of the group and exploded, resulting in smoke in that area.

"NOW WHAT!" Kaiba shouted. Sakura tried to run towards Kaiba in the confusion, but Andre restrained her.

"IT'S TEAM ROCKET! I'LL KICK THERE ASSES!" Cutepuppy shouted.

The smoke cleared and three duelists in long cloaks stood before them. The one in the middle stepped forward. He was obviously the leader. Joey rolled his eyes. "And the crossovers continues… whats next, 1930 sex symbols!"

"Allow us to help you too… We are the three Emblem Knights!" The leader said. "I'm Karl, and this is James, and Josh." (From the Fan Fic, "Emblem of the Duelist".)

Yami smiled and nodded his head. Andre stepped forward. "Hey Karl! What the hell, man! What took you so long!"

"Sorry man… we were on our way here, when we saw a sign for 99 cent nachos at this café, and we COULDN'T pass it up!" Karl explained.

Andre and Joey had fire in their eyes. "AND YOU DIDN'T BRING US ANY!" They both said in unison.

"Hey." James said. "We got some allies to help. COME ON OUT!"

From out of the bushes came teams Uremeshi and Taguro from Yu Yu Hakusho. Team Uremeshi consisted of Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei, Kurama, and Genka. Team Taguro consisted of Elder Taguro, Younger Taguro, Karasu (The Bomb Master), and Bui.

From another side of the area, Nuraku and Sesshomaru came and joined Inuyasha and Kagome.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Inuyasha asked.

"The same reason you're here! TO KICK SOME POKEMON ASS!" Seeshomaru shouted.

"Kagome… you may want to keep this." Nuraku said, handing Kagome her trusty bow.

"Hey thanks! I was just going to kick the shit out of anything Pokemon related, but putting an arrow between some bastard's eyes is good too!" Kagome said as she took her bow.

"If any Pokemon Trainer tries reaching this island, the Luffy Crew will shoot their asses down!" Josh said.

"OOOOHHH YEAH! WE ARE GOING TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS NOW!" Marik shouted.

"…OK everyone… gather around… we must plan and plan fast… for the Trinity Hour is upon us and…" Yami said.

"MUST YOU ALWAYS BE SO GOD DAMN DRAMATIC ALL THE TIME, YOU BONEY BITCH!" Kaiba shouted.

Yami, with pressure taking over his body, quickly took off his jacket and shirt, then threw them on the floor, exposing his chest. The girls all began to sweat and smile.

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, KAIBA! HUH? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, BITCH?" Yami said as he threw his arms into the air.

Kaiba threw off his long white robe like jacket, then took off his shirt and threw his garbs on the ground. "LETS FUCKIN' DANCE, ASS CLOWN!" He shouted. Everyone cheered as gathered around as Yugi and Kaiba were about to engage in a brutal deathmatch. It was then that the green bird from the Johto area landed on Destiny Island and right in between Yugi and Kaiba. The bird reverted back to Beast Boy. Starfire jumped up and down and began to clap. "Friend! You are back from your infiltration mission!" she said.

"DUDES! EVERY SINGLE POKEMON TRAINER ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH IS HEADING THIS WAY! THEY'LL BE HERE IN REALLY SOON!" Beast Boy shouted.

Everyone gasped.

"How do you know that they'll be here in half an hour!" Yami asked.

"Because this guy told me!" Beast Boy said. A person stepped out from behind him. Everyone gasped again, then each got into fighting stance. Tea ran in front of him and threw her arms out.

"NO! HES ON OUR SIDE!" Tea shouted.

"Its true." Eli said from inside the group. "He helped us escape from Team Rocket."

"But… He's Ash's right hand man for cryin out loud!" Mai shouted.

Brock stepped out from in front of Tea. "Hey, I've been slowing Ash and the others down. If it weren't for me, you would all be wiped out by now!"

"Well if you're really on our side, why the FUCK did you leave us to rot in a nasty ass jail cell for damn there a year?" Joey shouted.

"I left a hole there for you to get out! I thought you would have been smart enough to find it… Morons…" Brock replied.

"My thoughts exactly." Kaiba said.

"Whatever. We don't have time for this bullshit right now! We'll have to trust him for now. But we must act QUICKLY! The Trinity Hour is at hand!" Yami said as he put his shirt on and left his jacket hangin over his shoulders.

The group all huddled together. This was it… the time to act was now.

_**2 hours before the Trinity Hour… Preparations.**_

Yami and Brock walked around as everyone trained to prepare for the final battle. Duelists dueled with each other. Other's sparred with each other. This was no fight to cut corners around. Brock ditched his Pokemon and wore a Duel Disk that consisted of Rock Type Cards.

"…So once I was through researching this 'El Taco', I knew Ash had to be stopped, so I secretly helped Tea find allies this whole time… and besides, everyone knows that Duelists get more girls than Pokemon Trainers!" Brock explained.

"I see. Well thanks for your help… with this plan, we'll beat that bastard face, Ash, once and for all!" Yami said.

"Yeah." Brock said. "It's like that saying… you cut off the head of the snake and the rest of the body will die."

"So we get rid of Ash, and the Pokemon Trainers are fucked." Yami said.

He then turned to Brock. "So… did Tea… you know… give you some play?"

Brock had a huge smile on his face. "HELL YEAH MAN! AND IT WAS DA BOMB! NO POKEMON BITCHES WOULD HAVE EVER DONE THE THINGS SHE'S INTO!"

Yami closed his eyes. "Oh yeah… that girl knows how to work it!"

The two continued their walk as they talked about their "experiences" with Tea.

_**1 hour before the Trinity Hour...**_

The stars are aligned. The sun is in eclipse. The Pokemon Trainers are minutes from Destiny Island. The Duelists and their allies are about to face their greatest challenge ever. But is there really any hope of preventing Ash of becoming the El Taco?

"If what Beast Boy said was true… then the Pokemon trainers should be here any minute now." Robin said, facing the sea.

"When they land down here… they wont be any match for us!" Cyborg said. Everyone was spreaded out, waiting for the arrival. The Luffy crew patrolled the seas. Jeff Probst and his camera crew hid at the old Pootietang campsite.

"Hey…" Marik said. "Does the sky look different to you?"

"Must be part of the Trinity Hour…" Bakura said.

"No, its not!" Yami said.

"THOSE ARE FUCKIN HELICOPTERS AND…" Kaiba shouted wide eyed.

The sky was suddenly filled with helicopters and trainers riding flying Pokemon. Once they were close enough, a barrage of Pokeballs dropped from the sky and showered down on Destiny Island. As they popped open, An army of Pokemon Surrounded the Duelists, and their allies.

"NOW!" Yami shouted.

And it was on. The Pokemon all charged forward. The Duelists and their allies charged forward. It looked like the scene from the opening of the original X-Men cartoon. When they clashed together, the battle was on! Duel Monsters were summoned. Attacks were thrown. World War 3 has begun!

The rest of the Helicopters arrived and landed on the island. All the doors opened and Misty ran out and began directing traffic (Meaning she was leading the trainers to the battle field.)

"GO! GO! FUCKIN KILL THOSE BITCHES!" She shouted.

Suddenly, she turned around to face Brock.

"Asshole… how could you betray us?" She shouted with rage in her eyes.

"… You know why." Brock said with a smile on he face.

"YOU GOD DAMN PERVERT! NOW I'M REALLY GOING TO TAKE YOU DOWN! GO GYARADOS!" Misty shouted.

"No you don't! I ACTIVATE THE TRAP CARD, TRAP HOLE!" Brock yelled back. But nothing happened.

"Uhhh… guys…" Mai turned from her battle with a group of random female trainers. "You have to fuckin ACTIVATE your duel disk for it to work!" she shouted.

"You know what? I knew that." Brock said. After a while, he figured out how to activate his duel disk. "NOW… I ACTIVATE TRAP HOLE!" A hole appeared in the ground, but still, Gyarados stared Brock down.

"SHIT! I forgot Gyarados is a flying type too!" Brock said as he took a step back.

"Prepare to die you treacherous bastard! GYARADOS! DRAGON RAGE!" Misty shouted.

"HEY BROCK! USE MIRROR FORCE!" Tea shouted from the sidelines.

A wave of hot flames approached Brock fast as he shuffled through his new deck. "AH! I FOUND IT! MIRROR FORCE, GO!" He shouted as he slapped a card on his duel disk. The attack bounced off a large mirror like object and went back at Gyarados at full force. The blast was enough to take the large dragon like Pokemon down.

"OH NO! GYARADOS!" Misty shouted.

Brock threw his fist in the air. "YEAH! HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES, BITCH!"

Misty growled.

**30 minutes before the Trinity Hour…**

The fighting continued. It was truly the battle of the Millennuim. Duel Monsters shattered, Pokemon fainted… Trainers getting the shit beaten out of them by random allies, whether it was Sonic or Goku or the Teen Titans. Neither side was letting up.

"This is it… its time for the final part of the plan!" Tristan shouted. Two Pokemon trainers jumped him from behind, but Tristan, being Tristan, easily beat the crap out of them.

"HERE IT COMES!" Rex shouted as he glanced upwards from his battle.

A large stealth bomber like aircraft emerged from the middle of the forest. Inside the craft was Andre and Eli at the controls. Yami Yugi, Joey, and Kaiba were inside, along with the Angels (HinaFilipina, Atemu's Lover, Mystik Dragon, Cutepuppy, and Sakura Scorpion) and finally, the Emblem Knights.

"NEXT STOP… POKEMON TOWER!" Eli shouted.

"LET'S DO IT TO IT!" Andre shouted.

The aircraft took off into the skies. it flew at full blast, trying to make it to the Kanto Region before the Trinity Hour. Misty and her army was so into their fight that they never looked up to see the key part of the Yu-Gi-Oh! Team's plan.

Moments later, Lavender town was into view, along with the trademark of the town, Pokemon Tower. It was a dark place where deceased Pokemon are laid to rest.

"There it is! It looks like we'll be able to stop Ash from reciting the chant!" Yami said.

"You spoke too soon, Yuge!" Joey said.

Dragon like Pokemon emerged from the shadows and began to attack the Stealth. "Fuck! Someone's gonna have to do something about those dragons or this whole plan will go down in smoke!" Andre shouted.

"Leave them to us!" Yami shouted.

Outside, three hidden doors opened up. Yami, Joey, and Kaiba rose to the top of the aircraft.

"YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! YOU DARE CHALLENGE ME TO A BATTLE OF DRAGONS!" Kaiba shouted.

"GO RED EYES BLACK DRAGON!" Joey shouted as he summoned his beast. Yami and Kaiba did the same thing.

"GO, BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON!" Kaiba shouted.

"GO BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON!" Yami shouted.

Red Eyes and two Blue Eyes emerged from the duel disks and engaged in fighting the dragon Pokemon.

Kaiba's anger flared as he turned to Yami so fast he almost gave himself whiplash. "YOU STUPID MOTHER FUCKER! WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET THAT!"

"From your deck. Where else?" Yami said with a smile on his face.

"YOU BITCH! YOU FUCKIN TOUCHED MY DECK! ILL KILL YOUR ASS!"

Inside the craft, Everyone watched as Duel Monster and Pokemon Dragons fought it out.

"Damn, this is some exciting shit!" Karl said.

"I know! It's a damn shame this bucket doesn't have any lasers on it or it would be some Star Fox up in this bitch!" Andre said.

It was then that the bodies of Yugi and Kaiba was seen rolling off the windows, grappling with each other, then fell downwards out of sight. Everyone watched the scene, wide-eyed.

"…God dammit…" Eli muttered. Joey returned inside the stealth. "Uh guys…"

"…We know… we saw…" Eli replied.

The stealth suddenly dropped at an alarming rate. Yugi and Kaiba were punching and kicking each other as they both plummeted downwards towards the ground. Kaiba grabbed Yugi by the neck and positioned him so that when they hit the ground, Kaiba would use Yugi to break his fall. Yugi reversed the hold by grabbing Kaiba by the neck and bashing his head off of his. Once Kaiba recovered from the attack, he noticed that he was on the bottom. The stealth quickly flew in and caught the two fighting duelists. Once back inside, Yugi and Kaiba immediately began to viciously attack each other. It was then that the Emblem Knights came to separate the two.

Andre turned around in his seat. "Hey, what grade are you mother fuckers in again?"

"HE TOUCHED MY FUCKIN DECK! NO ONE TOUCHES MY MOTHER FUCKIN' DECK!" Kaiba shouted.

"Heh heh heh! I just wanted to see how pissed he would get…" Yami said with a huge smile on his face.

The Emblem Knights shook their heads and laughed. Andre turned back around. "Ok everyone. Hang on! Were gonna break thru that fleet!" He shouted.

Eli was ready and willing at the controls. "Lets rock!"

**(To strengthen the mood, imagine that "Highway to the Danger Zone" by Kenny Loggins is playing through this scene)**

The thrusters engaged on the stealth as it shoot through the dragons. More and More dragon Pokemon emerged and began firing at the stealth, but it nimbly dodged each attack. The stealth was dead set on reaching Pokemon Tower.

The dragons stopped for a second, then fired one that's attack. The attack hit the main thruster, which sent the stealth plummeting to the ground, just inches from the Pokemon Tower.

"OH DAMN! WE'VE BEEN HIT! AND WE WERE SO CLOSE!" Eli shouted.

"SHIT! EVERYONE, HOLD ON TO YOUR DUEL DISKS!" Andre shouted.

As the stealth plummeted to the ground, Andre found a landing spot. Rebecca was seen running towards the Pokemon Tower.

**(End of the song scene)**

"Ill get that jerk for locking me up in a Pokeball for a year!" she shouted. Suddenly, the stealth landed on the little blonde girl, crushing her. The door opened, and Yami, Joey, Kaiba, The Emblem Knights, Andre, Eli, and the Angels ran out.

"That landing was soft." Joey said.

Andre and Eli looked at each other and smiled. Yami ran ahead. "Come on… we don't have much time!" He shouted. The group began running towards the Pokemon Tower, but no sooner than when they got there, a huge phoenix like Pokemon dropped down from the skies and blocked the door. The giant bird let out a blood curdling roar.

"WHAT… THE FUCK… IS THAT!" Joey shouted.

"It looks like an oversized turkey!" Karl shouted.

Kaiba growled. "We don't have time for this shit! All I want to do is beat the high holy shit out of that little bastard and get back to my number one objective of killing Yugi! IS THAT SO FUCKIN HARD TO ASK FOR!"

The Emblem Knights looked at each other and nodded. They turned to the others.

"Hey guys… We'll distract this ugly ass thing… you guys go up and take care of that stupid ass kid!"

"NO way man! I'm not gonna let you fight this bastard alone!" Andre said.

"Don't worry dude. We're the Emblem Knights, remember?" Karl replied. Andre nodded. "Beat that ass for me, man!"

"Oh we'll beat that ass… then we'll eat it at our victory party later!" James replied.

"NO GO!" Karl shouted.

Yami and the others busted into the Pokemon Tower as the Emblem Knights stood tall against the giant bird known as Ho-oh.

They each activated their duel disks, and the battle was on!

Inside the tower, Yami, Joey, Kaiba, and the others ran up the long stairway, trying to reach the top. Another door came into view.

"Argh! Damn this tower for being so tall!" Joey said.

"Dammit… NOW WHAT?" Kaiba shouted. There were four individuals that guarded the door.

"You will go no further." The leader said. "You cannot bother Master Ash."

"Get… OUT… OF … OUR… WAY!" Yami said.

"Just try and get past us… we'll make you regret it." Another guy said. These individuals were known as the Elite Four: Lorelei, a smart, beautiful woman who used Ice Pokemon (and had a large rack), Bruno, a muscle bound man who uses rock type Pokemon, Agatha, an elderly woman who used ghost type Pokemon, and the leader, Lance, a young man who used Dragon types.

The Angels stepped forward. "This one's ours!" HinaFilipina said.

"Yeah! You guys bitch slap Ash for us!" Mystik Dragon said.

"Look at this… the cheerleaders think they can take us on!" Lance laughed.

The girls each pulled out guns and shot down the Elite Four's Pokeballs.

"AAAHH! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU WENCHES DO!" Agatha shouted.

"Now you cant summon those retarded ass creatures to do your dirty work!" Cutepuppy shouted.

"Yeah! Now your gonna fight us face to face!" Atemu's lover said.

"Now come on! I'm ready to rip some bastards apart… for my Kaiba…" Sakura said as she winked at Seto.

Kaiba cringed as he turned to the others. "Come on! Lets get the fuck out of here!" he said.

The girls threw down their guns, and each pulled out swords, then charged at the Elite Four.

"Ain't this a bitch…" Lance said as he watched them wide-eyed.

"I sure hope you all have life insurance!" Andre shouted.

Atemu stopped in her tracks. "WHATS THAT SUSPOSED TO MEAN, ANDRE!" she shouted.

"… I was talking to the Elite Four…" Andre said.

"…I knew that!" Atemu said as she went back to swinging her sword.

Yami, Kaiba, Joey, Andre, and Eli continued up the stairs.

"Fuck all these stairs!" Joey said.

"Are you complaining again, Mutt?" Kaiba said.

"WHAT? THAT'S IT KAIBA! I'M GONNA…"

"NO!" Eli shouted. "Save that energy and anger for Ash."

They each continued up the stairs. Joey stopped for a minute. "I hope Mystik Dragon is ok… She was lookin damn sexy with that sword…"

A few moment's later, they reached the top. The final door stood between them and their final showdown with Ash.

"This is it guys… Lets go!" Yami shouted.

**10 minutes before the Trinity Hour… 5:56pm**

Joey and Andre kicked down the door. Ash stood there, staring into the dark, cloudy sky with Pikachu. He quickly turned around.

"Yugi! Joey! Kaiba! It's SO good to see you! How are you? I missed you SO much!" Ash said with fake happiness.

"Yeah I'll bet you did you little queer!" Kaiba shouted.

"This is it Ash… I don't know how you found out about the Trinity Hour, but we wont let you end the world!" Yami shouted.

"I'm afraid it's no longer your place to decide my fate… not like what you did ten thousand years again… BIG BROTHER!" Ash replied.

"BIG BROTHER?" Everyone, sans Kaiba, said in unison.

"Whats this idiot talkin' about, Yuge?" Joey asked.

"I have no idea. There is NO WAY a whiny little bastard like him is in any way related to me!" Yami shouted.

"Has being stuffed in that puzzle all these years affected your memory? YAMI?" Ash said.

"Ok… Now I'm getting freaked out… how does he know your REAL name, Pharaoh?" Andre asked.

"ASH! STOP THESE STUPID ASS MIND GAMES!" Yami shouted.

Ash had an evil smile on his face. "If anyone's playing games, its you idiotic duelists… but then I'm one to talk, right? I played Duel Monsters back in ancient Eygpt myself! When I lived in the palace!"

"What the hell is he babbling about?" Eli asked.

"I don't know, but fuckin around with my past is starting to piss me off! Lets just cut his fuckin' head off so we can go the fuck home!" Yami shouted.

"You still have no idea who I really am, do you Yami?" Ash said. "Well maybe THIS will ring a bell!"

Ash took off his official Pokemon League hat and revealed that he was wearing a crown. This crown kind of looked like a tiara. It had two jewels on each side… one was red, the other was green, and on the right side, one was purple, and the other was orange. In the center of the crown was the eye like icon that was on all the Millennium Items.

A cold chill shot down Yami's spine as he saw the crown on Ash's head… "No… NO! The forgotten Millennium Item… the 8th Millennium Item…" Yami said quietly.

"Oh son of a bitch…" Kaiba said. "More god damn drama…" He pulled out his cell phone and started to play a game on it.

Joey, Andre, and Eli looked at Yami. "Yami… Is that a Millennium Item on his head? I thought there was only 7 of those things!" Andre said.

"Is what Ass said true, Yuge!" Joey asked.

"Yes… it cant be… ARTEMIS!" Yami shouted.

"It's about fuckin' time!" Ash said.

Like all Hikaris when they have a spirit, Ash's eyes became almost rectangular with an evil glare in it, and his hair stood upwards. Ash now had an evil look in his face.

"I am the great Yami's younger brother… Artemis!" He said. "Allow me to explain… I wanted to be pharaoh… so I teamed up with High Priest Seto and tried to kill Yami, but that bastard must have four leaf clovers growing on his damn pubic hairs, because the bastard avoided EVERY death trap we set for him… the bitch just WOULDN'T DIE!"

"Ain't that the truth." Kaiba said as he continued his game.

"So, I did some research…" Artemis said. "I learned of the Trinity Hour. When the time came, I stood tall and recited the chant. I was then reborn as The El Taco and I nearly destroyed Egypt! I knew it was the only way to draw out the Pharaoh, and boy did it work! I cant remember how, but those bastards were able to beat me, then Yami sealed me away in the Millennium Crown, and I sat there all these damn years… til one day, Ash and his friends were fishing, and he pulled the crown out from the ocean. I had a bond with him. I told him that if he put on the crown, I would make him the world's greatest Pokemon Master! And ever since then, I've been trying to kill you, Yami!"

"So that explains how Ash knew about the Trinity Hour!" Yami said.

"And it also explains why these bastard ass Pokemon Trainers were so annoying that they kept picking fights with us every chance they got!" Joey said.

Kaiba put his phone away. "Great fairy tale. Now It's time to beat your ass and go back home."

"BULLSHIT!" Artemis shouted. He turned to Pikachu. "Pikachu! Use your Thunderbolt attack on those assholes!"

Pikachu looked at Artemis with a said look on his face. "Pika…"

"You insolent little cur! I gave you an order! Now DO IT!" Artemis shouted. Still, Pikachu stood there, confused, staring at his former trainer.

"God dammit…" Artemis groaned. His face suddenly returned to Ash's face. "Pikachu, use Thunderbolt on the Duelists!"

Pikachu quickly got into fighting stance. "PI-KA-CHUUUUU!" he called out. A large thunder bolt hit Yami, Joey, Kaiba, Andre, and Eli, shocking them. They all yelled, then dropped to the ground. Static surrounded their bodies.

"I-I cant move…" Andre said.

"Me…either… that… bitch…paralyzed… us…" Yami said.

The Duelists struggled, but couldn't move. Ash's face reverted back to Artemis'. Suddenly, Artemis kicked Pikachu, sending the little yellow mouse flying over the edge of the tower and plummeting to the ground. "STUPID YELLOW PIECE OF SHIT! NEXT TIME I GIVE YOU AN ORDER, YOU BETTER FUCKIN' OBEY! BE LUCKY I DIDN'T SEND YOUR ASS TO THE SHADOW REALM!"

_**10… 9… 8…7… 6… 5… 4 … 3 … 2 …1… 6:06pm**_

"MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! WATCH, BIG BROTHER, AS YOU ONCE AGAIN WITNESS THE EL TACO!" Artemis laughed.

"… No…" Yami muttered.

Artemis cupped his hands together and closed his eyes.

"_Namu-amida-butsu… om mani padme hum… erdna nikcuf xor!"_

The sky turned a purplish blue. Thunder and lightning began to roar from all around. Four evil spirits appeared. Each of them held out their hands and emited an eerie energy from there hands, which engulfed Artemis.

"OOOHHH YES! OOOOOHHH YES! THIS IS IT! THIS SHIT FEELS BETTER THAN SEX!" He shouted.

Yami and his crew continued to struggle, but their bodies were still numb from paralysis.

Artemis floated upwards. His clothes ripped from his body. He began to grow, getting muscular. A long skirt like garmet covered his crotch area. Six long wings, three on each side, began to grow out of his back. His skin began to turn a baby bluish clolor. His face turned even more evil as it got longer. His eyes became blood red. His hair began growing at an alarming rate, turned a dark orange. The Millennium Crown still rested on his head. The energy waves stopped as a black aura surrounded Artemis' new form. This was it… Artemis had been reborn as the El Taco!

"BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! YES! FROM THIS MOMENT ON, I AM NOW ARTEMIS EL TACO!" Artemis shouted. His voice was a combination of Artemis' voice (which was Ash's voice, but a little bit deeper), and a deep, raspy, demonic voice.

The paralysis suddenly wore off and Yami and his crew jumped to their feet. "Geezus… he's… he's… HUGE!" Andre shouted.

"Stand tall everyone! WE'LL WIN TOGETHER! OR TOGETHER WE'LL FALL!" Yami shouted. Joey glanced at his best friend. "Why don't I like the sound of that…?" he said.

"NOW YOU FOOLS… HAVE A SMALL SAMPLE OF MY POWER!" Artemis El Taco said. He swung his large arm, which created a hurricane like wind attack. The duelists guarded their faces with their arms, trying not to get blown away. Andre and Eli lost their footing, and was instantly blown off the tower. The two of them yelled as they dropped down from the Tower. Yami turned around.

"ANDRE! ELI! NOOOOOOO!" Yami shouted.

"ASSHOLE! YOU STUPID ASSHOLE! YOUR GONNA PAY FOR THAT!" Joey shouted.

Once the wind died down, Joey, Yami, and Kaiba activated their Duel Disks. "GO! GEARFRIED THE IRON KNIGHT! TINY GUARDIAN! SWORDSMAN OF LANSTAR! AND GILFORD THE LIGHTNING!" Joey shouted.

Each of his monsters appeared and went directly after Artemis. They each slashed at his chest, but didn't put as much as a dent.

"WHAT WAS THAT! No, really… what was that? I didn't feel shit." Artemis said. He extended his arms, then quickly closed them, clapping his hands together with tremendous force, catching Joey's four monsters in the middle. They were instantly destroyed.

"Oh no… OH NO!" Joey shouted.

"Fuckin' third rate duelist…" Kaiba shouted. "Let a REAL DUELIST SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE! MY TWO BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGONS!"

Kaiba's dragons appeared, then immediately shot their White Lightning attack, which connected, but didn't even faze Artemis El Taco.

"What the hell! WHAT THE SHIT! WHAT THE DAMN! WHAT THE FUCK!" Kaiba shouted. Joey looked at him with a huge smile on his face. Kaiba glanced at Joey. "One word out of you and I'm gonna pop you!" Kaiba shouted.

"My turn! I summon the other Blue Eyes White Dragon! Dark Magician! Dark Magician Girl! Buster Blader! Obnoxious Celtic Guardian!" Yami shouted.

Each of the monsters emerged from Yami's Duel Disk. "Now my monsters! Everyone but Blue Eyes ATTACK!"

All of Yami's Monsters attacked. Kaiba quickly activated Polymerization. All three Blue Eyes White Dragons became the Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon.

"GO MY GREAT BEAST! ATTACK!" Kaiba shouted.

Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon shot out a very large beam of energy. The combined attack from Yami and Kaiba's monsters connected head on, but Artemis El Taco stood there with a huge grin on his face.

"It's cute… VERY CUTE! The little performance you're putting on for your most dangerous adversary! Haven't you idiots realized it yet? I… AM… INVINCIBLE!" Artemis shouted.

"FUCK! Yami shouted. "OK! SEE IF YOU CAN STAND AGAINST THIS! I PLAY BLACK LUSTER RITUAL! AND I SACRIFICE GAIA THE FIERCE KNIGHT AND KURIBOH IN ORDER TO SUMMON… BLACK LUSTER SOLDIER!"

Black Luster soldier rose from a dark hole in the ground and stood tall in front of Yami.

"THEN I ACTIVATE POLYMERIZATION… FUSING BLACK LUSTER SOLDIER WITH BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON! TO FORM MASTER OF DRAGON SOLDIER! THEN I SUMMON SUMMONED SKULL!" Yami shouted.

"NEXT, I SUMMON RED EYES BLACK DRAGON! AND I'LL USE POLYMERIZATION TO FORM THE BLACK SKULL DRAGON!" Joey shouted.

Each of the two monsters stood in front of Yami, Joey, and Kaiba, followed by Yami's Monsters.

"We're not done yet Artemis! I COMBINE ALPHA, BETA, AND GAMMA, THE MAGNET WARRIORS, TO FORM VALKYRION, THE MANGA WARRIOR!"

Valkyrion appeared in between Master of Dragon Soldier and the Black Skull Dragon.

"MONSTERS… ATTACK!" Yami, Kaiba, and Joey shouted in unison

Each of the monsters combined their attacks, and a large beam shot out and hit Artemis dead on. The result was a HUGE explosion. The shockwave almost knocked Yami, Joey, and Kaiba on their asses.

"HELL YEAH! THERES NO WAY ANYONE COULD SURVIVE AN ATTACK LIKE THAT!" Joey shouted happily.

When the smoke cleared, Artemis floated, still unfazed from the attack. "Is that all you got? Because if it is, you'd better give up RIGHT NOW!" he said.

The three duelists were speechless. They couldn't believe that Artemis didn't have as much as a scratch from their overwhelming attack.

"Awww, don't look so down… that shit would have worked in your little card game, but not on a god like myself!" Artemis said with fake sympathy. Yami, Kaiba, and Joey growled. Artemis El Taco put on a little smile. "Hey… if it makes you feel better, I almost felt that attack… ALMOST."

"YOU POMPUS WINDBAG!" Kaiba shouted. "I'll teach your cocky ass some respect!" He pulled out a gun out of an unknown location and began firing all his shots on Artemis. Nothing happened.

"What is he…" Kaiba said. Kaiba, being Kaiba, tried his best to hide the fear that began to grip his heart.

"Hey. If you guys are done being stupid, I'd like to have a turn." Artemis said. Yami gasped.

"I call this attack… RAIN OF HELL!"

Artemis flicked his hands back and forth, witch dropped down a powerful acid like rain drops, which instantly obliterated Yami's remaining monsters, only leaving Valkyrion, Master of Dragon Soldier, and Black Skull Dragon standing.

"MWA HA HA HA HA!" Artemis laughed. Next, his eyes began to shine. He shot beams out of his eyes, which hit the three remaining monsters, blowing them away.

"OH NO!" Yami shouted.

"WE HAVE TO STOP HIM! WERE THE THREE CHOSEN DUELISTS, DAMMIT!" Joey shouted.

Monster after monster was summoned, but nothing worked. The Duelists were out of monster cards.

"I must applaud your efforts. You fought to the bitter end! But this is it! It's time to die! Yami… big brother… I think I'll start with you!"

Yami Yugi dropped to his knees.

"OH HELL NAW!" Kaiba shouted. "Listen bitch! I don't know if you've been listening or not, but Yugi will die by MY hands! YOU HEAR ME!" Kaiba then charged at Artemis. Artemis simply shook his head, disgusted.

"Look at this fool…" He said to himself. Artemis floated down towards Kaiba. Kaiba executed punch after kick after punch, but nothing fazed the large being. Artemis moved his large hand towards Kaiba's head and flick him. Kaiba flew back towards the Yami and Joey, unconscience.

"KAIBA!" They both shouted.

"What Kaiba did just now was NOT brave… it was pure stupidity." Artemis said.

"YOU'RE MINE!" Joey said.

"NO! JOEY, DON'T!" Yami shouted.

"DON'T WORRY YUGE! UNLIKE KAIBA, I KNOW HOW TO FIGHT!" Joey called back. It was the same result. Artemis flicked Joey in the head. He was sent plummeting next to Kaiba, unconscience.

"Now its just you and me, 'Pharaoh'… this world now belongs to Artemis! First I'll kill off the rest of your friends, and then I'll start a world of DARKNESS! EVIL WILL CLUTCH THE EARTH!" Artemis said. Yami put his hands in his pockets.

"Theres nothing I can do… I … I cant beat Artemis!"

It was then that Yami felt something. "What's this?" He pulled out the card that was given to him by Tristan back when they were locked up in the Team Rocket prison.

"It's the card Pegasus wanted to give me!" Yami said. It was mysteriously clear what Yami had to do now.

"Are you ready to die… BIG BROTHER?" Artemis said.

Yami put on his trademark grin. "The question is, Artemis… are YOU ready to die!"

"What? WHAT! WHAT! YOU BITCH! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO THE FUCK YOUR TALKING TOO! I'M A FUCKIN GOD NOW!"

"No… what you are is FUCKED!" Yami said boldly. "I PLAY THE CARD THAT WAS GIVEN TO ME BY PEGASUS AND TRISTAN… PORTAL OF LIGHT! THIS CARD ALLOWS ME TO SUMMON AN ALL POWERFUL MONSTER THAT WILL BE JUST ENOUGH TO STOP YOU! A MONSTER THAT CONSISTS OF THE LIGHT OF THE GODS!"

"HEY… JACKASS…" Artemis said. "Last time I checked, you had a heart that was damn there darker than mine! You know damn well you wont be able to control a monster like that!"

"WHO THE HELL SAID I WAS CONTROLING THE MONSTER!" Yami shouted.

"What the hell are you talking about!" Artemis shouted. "TELL ME!"

Yami suddenly retreated to the Millennium Puzzle and Little Yugi stood against Artemis.

"YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME!" Artemis laughed. "YOU SENT THIS LITTLE SOGGY SHIT SANDWICH OUT AGAINST ME! BIG BROTHER, YOU'RE A FUCKIN COWARD!"

"A shit sandwich am I?" Yugi said. "I'll show you what this shit sandwich can do! I USE PORTAL OF LIGHT TO BRING OUT ONE OF THE MOST POWERFUL MONSTERS IN DUEL MONSTERS… I SUMMON… THE DIVINE MAGICIAN!"

A beam of light appeared from the sky. A monster that looked similar to the Dark Magician arose from the heavens. The only difference was, instead of purple, this magician was dressed in white.

"What the fuck! All that talk and THIS is what you give me! I'll kill this weak piece of shit, then I'LL EAT YOU!" Artemis shouted.

"HAH!" Yugi laughed. "You may think this is the Dark Magician, but the Divine Magician isn't in the Spellcaster class! It's in the DIVINE class!"

Suddenly, every single monster that was destroyed suddenly appeared behind Yugi.

"What the fuck is this! I killed those damn monsters! What are they doing back here!" Artemis shouted.

"Divine Magician's special ability! He takes the spirit from EVERY monster that I lost, including my friend's monsters, and adds it to his attack! And, for every magician in the field, graveyard, or my hand, I get an additional 800 attack points… but since this isn't a game, its added to Divine Magician's strength! Making his power INFINITE!" Yugi said boldly.

"YOU MISERABLE LITTLE SHIT! HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE I'M ONE OF YOUR LITTLE SCHOOL FRIENDS!"

"THIS IS IT, ARTEMIS! YOUR REIGN OF TERROR IS OVER BEFORE IT EVEN STARTED!" Yugi declared. "DIVINE MAGICIAN! ATTACK!" Yugi and Yami shouted in unison.

The Divine Magician pointed his rod at Artemis. "No, no… YOU KNOW WHERE TO ATTACK!" Yugi said with a grin on his face.

The Divine Magician lowered his rod. A large wave shot from his rod and zeroed in on Artemis El Taco.

"THIS IS NOTHING… THIS… IS… NOTHING!" Artemis shouted, positioning his hands to block the attack. However, the wave wasn't going for his chest or his head… it was heading for his no-nos.

The attack when through like a hot knife through butter.

"AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Artemis shouted. "You… you… you dirty… how dare you… attack me… THERE…!"

"NOW ARTEMIS! ATTACK HIS HEART!" Yugi shouted.

The Divine Magician shot one more energy wave. Once again, it went through Artemis with no effort. Artemis dropped to the ground. A blood like substance flowed through both holes. Drool and blood were flowing from his mouth.

"AARRGGHH… what… what did … you do… to me!" Artemis said. He began to gag and cough. "This… this cant… this cant happen… to me!"

Yugi quickly ran over to Kaiba and Joey. He began shaking them like crazy. "GUYS! JOEY! KAIBA! WAKE UP! WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!"

Joey and Kaiba woke up, then saw the unpleasant scene in front of them. Both of their stomachs turned.

"UGH! WHAT THE FUCK!" Kaiba shouted.

"DAMN YUGE! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO!" Joey shouted.

"He's gonna blow! We've got to get out of here!" Yugi said.

Joey and Kaiba got up, and the two of them ran to the edge of the tower.

"Shit! That's a long way down!" Joey said.

"I guess this is it guys… were gonna go down with the tower…" Yugi said.

Kaiba growled. Suddenly, an aircraft emerged in front of them. The door opened. Andre and Eli were in the drivers seat. Karl ran to the entrance. "QUICK! GET IN! HURRY!" He shouted. Yugi, Joey, and Kaiba nodded, then jumped inside the aircraft. Yugi ran to Andre.

"Hey! Andre! Eli! You're alive!" he said happily.

"Yeah! When we got knocked off the Pokemon tower, we were lucky enough to land on Ho-oh's dead body! Then the Emblem Knights helped us fix our damaged air craft! We even put guns on this bitch! But then when we got here, we noticed the fight was already over." Andre explained.

"Now we've gotta jet before we get caught in the impact!" Eli shouted.

Kaiba dusted himself off and was grabbed from behind by Sakura. "KAIBA! YOUR ALIVE!" she said happily.

"GET HER OFF ME! GET HER OFF!" Kaiba shouted desperately. Cutepuppy and Hinafilipina was able to pry Sakura off Kaiba, then restrain her.

Joey put his hand on Mystik Dragon. "Hey… You ok?" He asked. Mystik Dragon smiled. "Yes." She said timidly.

"Hey! What about me!" Atemu's Lover said. Andre got up, walked over, kissed her on the cheek, then walked back to the controls. "Happy?" He said. "…Lots!" She said with a smile. Hinafilipina shook her head. "OH HELL NAW! ANDRE?" Andre banged his head on the control panels. "Ok… now I'm boned." He said. Eli looked over at him. "YOU PLAYBOY!" He said. Andre flipped him off.

"DAMMIT! WOULD YOU LIKE TO GET OUT OF HERE! WERE STILL IN FUCKIN' DANGER!" Kaiba shouted.

"RIGHT!" Andre and Eli said in unison. With that, the jet boosters were activated and the stealth took off, moments before a huge, ugly explosion. A huge shock wave wiped out Lavender Town, and was going after the stealth.

Another jet booster was activated and the aircraft shot off towards the sky, avoiding the shockwave. This was it. The threat of Artemis was put to rest. It was also a two for one deal. Ash was also put out of his misery as the explosion got him too. The threat of Pokemon was finally over… for good this time!

**Location: Destiny Island : 7:03pm**

Everyone cheered as the aircraft touched down on the island. Yugi, Kaiba, Joey, Andre, Eli, The Emblem Knights, and The Angels all got out of the aircraft. It was truly a time to celebrate!

"Yugi! You guys did it!" Tea said happily.

"Yep! Those damn Pokemon Trainers wont be bothering us EVER AGAIN!" Yugi said.

"Damn… it looks like Nam out here!" Joey said as he looked around. Beaten and Battered bodies of Pokemon Trainers and Pokemon were all laid out all over the place.

"Anyways, now we can get back to whats important!" Mai said.

"Yeah… like me killing Yugi's ass!" Kaiba said.

"Awww, big brother!" Mokuba laughed. Everyone else joined in and laughed.

"Oh hey Yugi!" Tristan said. "Guess what! You were right, man! Pegasus really did survive! He came and helped us fight the Pokemon Trainers!"

Tristan pointed to Pegasus, who was standing in between Rex and Weevil. He was wearing a Team Rocket outfit. Yugi walked over to Pegasus.

"Pegasus… thank you SO much… thanks to that card you gave me, I was able to beat Artemis El Taco and save the world from…"

Suddenly, Pegasus' body began to vibrate. He twitched around, then fell to the floor. Pegasus' head rolled off the body and by Yugi's feet. "EEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKK!" Yugi screamed as he jumped back like 4 steps. Pegasus' head was put on the body of a dead Team Rocket grunt.

Tristan began to bust up laughing out of nowhere, followed by the laughing of the rest of the Duelists and Allies.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I TOLD YOU GUYS HE WOULD FALL FOR IT! MARIK AND REX! YOU BOTH OWE ME FORTY BUCKS!"

"Fuck that shit! We never shook on that!" Rex laughed.

"You guys!" Yugi laughed. Tristan, still laughing, put his arm around Yugi. "Damn Yuge… you are SOOO easy!" he laughed.

Yugi put his arm around Tristan. "Yeah… I know… but not as easy as your mama, bitch! BOOOOONG!" Yugi shouted

Everyone on the island laughed.

And so, it was truly over. Artemis had been put to rest. A majority of the Pokemon Trainers were dead. Whoever was leave now wonders the Shadow Realm. Everyone from then on out, lived peacefully.

**The End.**

"Wait, Wait, Wait!" Jeff Probst shouted.

**Huh? What?**

"In case you forgot, this fan fic is called Survivor: Duelist Style! And we STILL don't have a winner!"

**OH YEAH! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THAT!**

**  
**Jeff turned to the others. "Ok guys… Now that that's over, its back to Survivor… and in case you all forgot, We were in the middle of an Immunity Challenge!"

Yugi closed his eyes and Yami Yugi took over. Joey and Rex stood next to him.

"Ok… this is it… those cards are mine!" Yami said.

"You'll have to get past me first!" Joey said.

"Don't forget, I'm still in this too, you chump-a-saurs!" Rex said. "I'll be the one winning this…"

"_OH REXY-PIE!"_

Rex's skin turned pale. His eyes wided. "No… NO… FUCK NO! GOD NO!" Rex slowly turned around to see Bernadette running at him.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!" Rex shouted as he took off running for dear life. Bernadette was hot on his heels.

Everyone laughed even harder than before.

**And so, now that The Pokemon Threat is finally over, its back to Survivor! But who will win? Will it be Yugi Muto? Joey Wheeler? Or Rex Raptor? Considering he deals with his… big problem! Find out next time on Survivor! Duelist Style!**

**So what did you all think? Did you enjoy it? I put a lot of thought into this chapter so I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! Til then, please R&R.**


	20. The Trials of Amazon Island

Sorry about the long wait. I would have updated sooner, but as much as I love you all for supporting my work, I wasn't too wild about the idea of spending my summer confined to a computer screen. But anyways, here's … the next episode!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do I own Survivor.

**3 Duelists…**

**Yugi Muto… Joey Wheeler… Rex Raptor… **

**2 Prizes…**

**3 Million Dollars…. Treasure Chest full of rare cards…**

**WHO WILL BE THE WINNER? FIND OUT WHO GET'S THE BOOT TODAY ON…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

**Confessional : Joey Wheeler**

Joey sat in front of a camera, doing his camera time.

"Well this was an interesting experience… living on some deserted island, cut off from all life, getting harassed by Pokemon… but today it ends… today I show the world… and ESPECIALLY Kaiba, that Joey Wheeler is number one! Whatever the Final Immunity Challenge is, ill win it for sure!"

**Confessional : Rex Raptor**

Rex sat in front of a camera, doing his camera time.

"Yugi is a cocky little bitch! He thinks that just because the show is called Yu-Gi-Oh! And he's the main character, he's gonna be the one to win! Well I think not! I'll show them that Rex Raptor, the Dino Duelist, will be the one to shine! I may have gotten screwed out of not facing that Del Taco or whatever the fuck that was, but I will NOT be screwed out of getting what's rightfully mine!"

In the background, Yami Yugi could be seen signaling someone. Suddenly, the cameras began to shake as the sound of loud footsteps began to get louder. Rex tightly closed his eyes.

"Oh HELL no… it cant be!" he said with fear in his voice.

"OH REXY-PIE!"

Rex suddenly jumps out of his seat and throws it behind him, then runs off camera. Bernadette ran by after him a few seconds later. The cameras zoomed in on Yami as he walked over, then picked up the chair and sat in it.

**Confessional : Yugi Muto**

Yami sighed. "That was ok. But it just isn't the same as when I played a prank on Kaiba… I cant believe I'm about to say this… but I miss Seto. It's just not as funny watching someone other than Kaiba get pissed. I guess you can say that He and I had good chemistry together…"

Yami looked around to see a bunch of stage hands giving him weird looks. He quickly jumped out of his seat.

"I'M TALKING ABOUT HOW WE DON'T GET ALONG! DAMN, GET YOUR FUCKIN' HEADS OUT OF THE CLOUDS!"

**Location : CBS Trailer : 1:04pm**

Jeff and a couple stagehands sat inside the trailor, talking about the whole Pokemon experience.

"So needless to say, that whole experience sucked ass." Once of the cameramen said.

"Tell me about it… so whatever happened to all those anime crossover people?" said another cameraman.

"Well, we had a big ass party, then they all went home. Including the Duelists. Well, we literally had to pry that Sakura chick off of Seto. Now its back to Survivor. Lets just get this finished so we can get out of here." Jeff said.

"You know what's scary?" said cameraman 1.

"Whats that?" Said the other.

"Seto didn't threaten Yugi ONCE! You think he's up to something?"

"…could be…"

"Don't worry… after that whole experience. I don't think Seto will be showing up for a while." Jeff said.

_**The scene cuts to inside Kaiba's Mansion, where Kaiba is sitting down in a chair watching Survivor.**_

"That's what you bitches think…" Kaiba said.

Suddenly, a big bouncer like guy came into Kaiba's quarters.

"Hey, Mr. Kaiba. It's time for you to do the photo shoot for the newest Duel Monster booster packs." He said.

Kaiba suddenly jumped out of his seat.

"WHAT! SHUT THE FUCK UP! Photo shoot… WE DO THE PHOTO SHOOT WHEN I SAY ITS TIME TO DO THE PHOTO SHOOT!" he shouted. He then started walking out the door, looking the bouncer up and down.

"…you lucky your bigger than me!"

**Location : Forest : 2:10pm**

Joey is walking around the forest, wearing a safari hat.

"Oy! Welcome back to Fat Ass Hunter! Today, we're gonna be hunting the elusive Nursepotamus!" Joey said to the cameras in an Australian accent.

He began to tip toe towards some bushes, then turned back to the camera. "Ok… we have to be VERY quiet!"

He peeked inside the bushes, to find Bernadette stripping down.

"CROIKEY! THAT IS THE SCARIEST SITES SINCE THE TIME I SAW I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER IN THEATRES!" Joey shouted.

Bernadette turned around. "Whos there! Is that you, Joey baby?"

Joey turned back toward the cameras. "OH SHIT! NURSEPOTAMUS HAS SPOTTED US! WE MUST NOW FLEE FOR OUR LIVES… AND THROW ACID IN MY EYES ON TOP OF THAT! SEE YA NEXT TIME!" He then took off running into some opposite bushes.

Rex Raptor walked into the scene a moment later. His jaws dropped. "Not again… NOT AGAIN!"

"REXY PIE!"

Rex took off running so fast, the cameras couldn't even pick it up.

**Location : Old Pootietang Property : 2:21pm**

Yami Yugi sadly sat drawing pictures in the sand with a stick. Jeff walked up to him.

"Hey Yugi… whats wrong…"

The cameras zoomed in on the two of them. Jeff looked up at them. "Hey, seriously you guys, back up. Yugi looks sad."

Yami looked up at Jeff. "Jeff… theres something I have to tell you… and its not very easy for me to say…"

The cameras zoomed back in on Jeff. "Hey, its just between you and me… HEY, I SAID BACK UP WITH THOSE CAMERAS!"

Yami sighed. "Ok… Jeff… I… I miss Kaiba!"

"What! Why?"

"Because…When Kaiba was around, I would always play pranks on him, just to piss him off! But now that he's gone, I'm just an empty shell of a duelist! It wont be the same pissing off Joey and Rex…"

The cameras then did an extreme close up on Jeff and Yami.

"Don't worry Yugi! This is the last Immunity Challenge… and by the end of the day, you'll be back to playing pranks on Seto, just like the good ol days!" Jeff said comfortingly.

"Thanks Jeff! You're a pal!" Yami said as the two of them shook hands.

"Always happy to help, Yu---" Jeff turned towards the cameras and noticed they were right in their faces.

"OH COME ON! DIDN'T I JUST SAY…"

The cameras suddenly turned to Yami as he had his fist brought back, then without warning, punched all the cameras. The scene suddenly dropped to the ground as the feet of Yami and Jeff walked away.

"… MAKIN' ME GO KENNY ROGERS IN THIS BITCH!" Yami shouted.

**  
Location : Beach : 3:00pm**

Jeff had Yami, Joey, and Rex gathered on the Island for the final challenge.

"Ok Pootiezongas… You've spent more than a year on this island…"

"AND IT WAS COMPLETE AND UTTER HELL!" Rex shouted.

"… but now its time for your final challenge. We were gonna have you do a race back to the mainland, but that seemed a little predictable, so, we had a different final challenge in mind." Jeff explained.

"… And whats that?" Joey said, confused.

"Well, We're going to take a ferry to another island, and you're going to compete in a life-or-death match with the natives on that island." Jeff said.

"HOLY SHIT!" Rex shouted.

"Have you lost your mind, Probst?" Yami shouted.

"Hey, after that whole Pokemon thing, what are you so worried about?" Jeff said.

"Good point." Joey said.

"Don't worry… The natives are all woman." Jeff said.

"YES! THIS IS GONNA KICK ASS!" Rex said.

"… Amazon women." Jeff said.

"Probst, I hate you as the days are long…" Rex replied.

Suddenly, Bernadette came out of nowhere. "Amazon Island! Hey, that's where I was born!" she said happily.

"… I hate this show with each passing minute…" Joey said.

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me!" Rex said.

"Don't worry Rexy… I'm sure the natives will give you some Jungle lovin', if you know what I mean!" Bernadette said seductively. Rex cringed.

"Jeff… one of these days, you're gonna feel what it's like to be raped by a fat woman… and I will be there."

"Waiting for your turn?" Jeff replied.

Everyone started laughing.

"I HATE YOU ALL!" Rex shouted.

"ANYWAYS, the ferry will be here in half an hour, so be ready. If your not on it, You'll be left behind and automatically forfeit the challenge." Jeff said.

And with that, they all went their separate ways. Rex took off running to get away from Bernadette. He hid in some bushes and began thinking to himself.

**Confessional : Rex Raptor**

"Ok, one fat bitch was bad enough, but now Amazon women! That's just drawing the line! This fuckin' writer has gone WAY too far this time! But you know what? Jeff said that if were not on the ferry by the time it gets here, then we'll be left behind and get eliminated! So if I'm not on the ferry… ill get eliminated… and sent home… NEVER EVER having to see Bernadette's ugly ass again! YES! IT'S PERFECT! I'll just burn time by singing to you all the theme song to Three's company!"

Rex cleared his throat.

"Come and knock on our door, (come and knock on our door), Guess who's waiting for you? (guess whos waiting for you…)"

Suddenly, Bernadette appeared behind Rex.

"Come on baby! Amazon Island is waitng for us!"

Rex was suddenly caught in Bernadette's arms. "NO! I DON'T WANNA GO! LET GO OF ME YOU FAT FUCK! LET ME GO! HEEEELLLLPPPPP!"

Bernadette turned and carried Rex back to the Beach.

**Location : Beach : 3:30pm**

The ferry to Amazon Island arrived. Yami, Joey, Jeff, some stagehands, and Bernadette (with Rex STILL in her death grip) boarded the ship. It was a half an hour sail to the new island. Once the boat arrived, the drawbridge was let down, and everyone, sans Rex , got off the ship. They all followed Jeff deep into the forest. Bernadette turned back towards the ship.

"Come on down, my little Rexy! I'll catch you!" she shouted to him.

"FUCK NO! I'LL GO TO HELL BEFORE I GO ANYWHERE NEAR YOU!" Rex shouted.

Suddenly, a TV was heard inside the cabin of the ship. _"And now, its time for Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends"_

"OH HELL NAW!" Rex shouted. He jumped off the ship, landed right next to Bernadette, then ran off into the forest after Yami, Joey, and Jeff.

**Location : Amazon Meeting Grounds : Amazon Island : 4:37pm**

Over 100 large, muscular, Miss Olympia type Amazon Women stood around as they watched Jeff enter with Yami, Joey, and Rex. The Pootiezongas were terrified.

"Man Yuge… one wrong move and those massive bitches will break us in two…" Joey said quietly.

"Yes… don't even make eye contact." Yami said.

"You here that, Raptor?" Joey asked.

"Wheeler… the only thing I'm looking at is the dandruff flakes in your hair." Rex replied. Joey began to frantically rub his head. "YOU LIE! YOU LIE!"

Jeff stopped at the throne of the head Amazon, followed by the others.

"Welcome to Amazon Island. Me Bertha! You here for Challenge, no?" she said.

"Yes… well, THEY are." Jeff said, pointing at the Duelists.

Bertha stood up. "CHALLENGE OF THE AMAZON!" She shouted. All the amazon women began to let out battle cries.

"… Why don't I like the sound of this?" Joey said, scared.

Bertha jumped down and landed in front of the Pootiezongas. Jeff started to back away. "Ok, Immunity Challenge is on! GOOD LUCK! YOU"LL NEED IT!" Jeff said as he broke into a mad dash off the cameras.

"BURN IN HELL, PROBST! YOU HEAR ME! BURN… IN … HELL!" Rex shouted.

"First you qualify for games!" Bertha said. "You do 'Snoo-Snoo'!"

All the amazons smiled and did their battle cries again. Yami, Joey, and Rex huddled together, scared.

"What the FUCK is Snoo-Snoo?" Rex shouted.

"I don't know… and I'm pretty I don't WANT to know!" Yami said.

"SNOO-SNOO! SNOO-SNOO! SNOO-SNOO! SNOO-SNOO!" The Amazons chanted as they grabbed the Pootiezongas and carried them off into different huts.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the boys shouted

Disturbing noises came from inside the hut.

_**A few hours later…**_

Yami, Joey, and Rex emerged from the hut with their crotches bandaged.

"…You just HAD to ask what Snoo-Snoo was, didn't ya, Raptor?" Joey said.

"…shut up, Wheeler… just shut up…" Rex replied. _"That shit was worse than Bernadette…"_

_**THE GAMES BEGIN!**_

The beaten and battered duelists stood before Bertha. "First task… You go to Azure Ruins. Find Golden Idol."

Jeff appeared behind the Amazon Queen. "And that person wins challenge one, and the online polls decide who gets voted off. The polls will open as soon as the challenge begins"

Off cameras, millions of viewers rushed to their computers.

"How do we get to these ruins?" Yami asked.

The Amazons all gave a battle cry, then lifted up the Pootiezongas and carried them off.

"I REALLY WISH YOU FUCKERS WOULD KEEP YOUR DAMN MOUTHS SHUT!" Rex shouted.

"AAAAAAAHHHHH! MY NUTS! WATCH MY NUTS!" Joey shouted.

The Amazons threw the Pootiezongas into a boat, and pushed it towards the ocean. The cameras followed as they drifted off into the sea.

"Yami sat at the back of the small rowboat with his legs crossed. "What do you suspose these ruins are like?" he asked.

"If their anything like Pokemon Palace, count me out!" Rex said.

"Speakin' of palaces, what the hell is that!" Joey said, pointed straight forward. The boat sailed through a large cloud of mist. Suddenly, something came into view. It appeared to be humongous castle that stretched for miles on end. A huge, glass dome surrounded the castle, supposedly for protection. Streams of water could be seen spraying out of random small windows that dotted the smooth stone walls. The current took the boat inside the castle through a hidden opening behind a waterfall. Yami, Joey, and Rex were soaked.

"This… just… isn't… my … day…" Rex muttered.

The boat drifted inside, which showed a ladder that seemed to lead upwards. Yami, Joey, and Rex climbed upwards. Once at the top, the Pootiezongas laid eyes upon many water slides. They criss-crossed the spacious room, making it impossible to tell which led to where.

Joey, being Joey, lost all control once he saw all the waterslides. "OH MAN! THIS IS FREAKIN' SWEET! LAST ONE DOWN IS A ROTTEN POTATA!"

"Ok, the Immunity Challenge is the first one who finds the Golden Idol wins, right? So it must be at the bottom somewhere." Yami said.

"SWEET! SO ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS RIDE THE SLIDE TO THE BOTTOM!" Joey said excitedly.

"That's right, Joey. But we don't know what lurks down there, so be on your guard." Yami said cautiously. "And remember, its every duelist for themselves from here on out!"

"YEAH! LETS DO 'DIS!" Joey said. He ran towards the first slide in front of him, then dove down head first.

"_WHOOOOOO HOO HOO HOO HOO!"_ Joey shouted his way down.

Rex walked towards the edge and looked down. It was dark. The bottom could not be seen. "Man, I don't do well with water!" he shouted.

Yami peered over at him. "You cant swim?" he asked.

"… I've been meanin to take lessons…"

"Don't worry. When you get down to the bottom, just hold your breath and you'll float right to the top."

Rex began to turn pail. "MAN, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS SHIT! YOU KNOW WHAT? IM JUST GONNA FORFEIT!"

"Bon Voyage." Yami said. He shoved Rex down a waterslide!

"_YUGI, YOU FUCKIN BASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!" _Rex shouted.

"Now." Yami said. "Lets try this one. You ready, partner?"

Yugi's transparent image appeared next to Yami. "Yup! Lets do it!" he said. Yugi faded away as Yami walked towards a slide to the right. He then jumped in the half-tube and rode the slide straight down.

Joey was having the time of his life as he boldly flew down head first down the water slide. Rex, however, was _not_ having the time of his life, as he screamed like a little girl the whole way down. He slid down on his back, feet up in the air, arms outstretched, and eyes wide. On another slide stood Yami. Yes, you read right. _Stood_. Yami was standing straight up on the slide, arms crossed, Enjoying his ride to the bottom. Even with the many twists and turns that the slide had, not _once_ did Yami fall, or even flinch. He grinned. _The Pharoah rides with style!_

At the bottom, the slides all were connected to the large lake like pool. Joey crashed down into the water, then poked his head out a few moments later. "WHOOOOOO! HELLS FUCKIN YEAH! LETS DO THAT SHIT AGAIN!" he shouted excitedly. A couple minutes later, Rex crashed down, but didn't come back up. Another couple minutes later, Yami reached the bottom, but instead of landing in the pool, he jumped up at the last minute and did a couple front flips and landed on a platform in the middle of the pool.

"How the FUCK did you did that!" Joey said.

"Skills, baby. Skills." Yami replied. "Um, where's Rex?"

"Got me. He hasn't come up yet."

Yami dove into the pool. He came out a minute later with Rex, who was coughing and gagging. Yami helped him onto the platform.

"YOU STUPID MOTHER FUCKIN SO OF A BITCH! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, PUSHIN' ME DOWN A FUCKIN WATERSLIDE LIKE THAT!" He shouted.

"Shut up. You're alive, aren't you?" Yami said.

"You know what! If I had my duel disk with me, I would challenge your ass right here, right now!" Rex shouted.

Yami shook his head. "Raptor… shut up before I kick your ass…"

Rex threw his arms outward. "BRING IT, BITCH!"

Yami quietly walked over towards Rex and pushed him back into the pool.

"Now, to find that Idol…"

Suddenly, Joey popped out of the water AGAIN. "Hey Yuge! Check this out! I found this gold thingy at the bottom of the pool!" He said as he held up the Golden Idol. "Oh, and I found this too." He said as he pulled Rex up. Rex once again coughed and gagged.

"JOEY! THAT'S THE…"

Suddenly a siren blared and Jeff Probst floated down from an unknown location. "Joey Wheeler, you've won the Immunity Challenge!" he shouted.

"Jeff! How did you get here?" Yami asked.

"We've been down here the whole time! Now, back to Amazon Island!"

"Jeff…" Rex said. "I hate you SO much right now!" Rex had a blanket wrapped around him.

**Location : Amazon Island : 9:50pm**

At the Amazon Island Meeting Ground, tiki lamps and torches lit the island. A small luau was going on, but the Pootiezongas, still frightened by the large women, were eating poi in a corner of the area. Jeff approached the group.

"Ok, we've tallied up the votes. As we all know, Joey cant be voted off, so…"

"Wait, I thought this was the final?" Yami said.

"Well, its kinda late, so the final-final challenge will be tomorrow." Jeff said.

"SO WHO GETS THE BOOT?" Rex shouted.

Jeff opened up the envelop. "The person kicked off the island next is… YOU! REX!"

Rex dropped his bowl. A huge grin shot across his face. "You lie… YOUR LYING!"

"Nope. Sorry Rex, but the…"

"YES! IM FREE! IM FUCKIN' FREE!" Rex shouted. "WHERES THE BOAT OFF THIS BITCH!"

Jeff pointed towards the docks. "SO LONG, BITCH-A-SAURS!" Rex shouted as he took off running through the party, then through the forest, til he reached the boat that lead back to Domino. He got on and started to relax.

"Ahh… homeward bound…" He said with a sigh. Suddenly, a shadow loomed over him. "There you are baby… I thought you'd never get here." Bernadette said.

Rex looked up at her, then held out his hand. "Guess what, you fat bitch… I've been voted off. I'm going home. And I never, ever, EVER want to see your ugly, fat, pizza looking face again." He said in a very calm voice. "Now get the FUCK off my boat before I KILL you!"

Bernadette finally got the hint. "But you said you wanted to be there for me…"

"I said no such thing… NOW FUCK OFF!" Rex said.

A tear rolled down her cheek. She slowly stepped off the boat, then turned to Rex and began to unzip something behind her. Rex ran to the edge of the boat and pointed at her.

"YOU TAKE THOSE CLOTHES OFF AND ILL FILL YOUR ASS WITH BULLETS FROM THIS ASSAULT RIFLE IM PACKING!"

Once the zipper was down, she pulled off her whole body, like something out of a cartoon. The REAL Bernadette, a slim, supermodel like nurse stood before him. Rex's mouth dropped.

"WHAT… WHAT THE!"

"This disguise was to see If a man would like me for my personality and not my looks. Thanks for proving my theory, Rex. You get your wish. You'll never see my face again." Bernadette said. Rex's boat began to drift away.

"NO, BERNADETTE! I WAS KIDDING! I NEVER MEANT ALL THOSE FAT JOKES! YOU KNOW I LOVE MY GIRLS WITH A FEW EXTRA ROLLS! COME BACK! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! FUCK NO!" Rex shouted into the night.

_**Back at the Luau…**_

Yami and Joey stood before Jeff. "This is it… You two are the final two Survivors. Tomorrow is the final day."

Yami and Joey looked at each other as the Yu-Gi-Oh! Theme began to play (You know, the part towards the end of the song, where it shows Joey, then Tristan, then Tean, then Kaiba… That part of the music.)

"This is it! May the best man win, Joey!" Yami said.

Joey returned with a thumbs up.

**This is it… the final showdown… it all comes down to Yugi and Joey! WHO WILL WIN IT ALL? FIND OUT NEXT CHAPTER OF SURVIVOR: DUELIST STYLE!**

**  
OK, I know I said THIS was gonna be the final, but I had a few more ideas. Next chapter is sadly the last. Im serious this time. So til then, read and review! Don't worry, the next chapter will NOT take like 3 months to get up. I promise (follow up story coming soon!)**


	21. The End of Survivor

**This is it, everyone. This is the final chapter. I thank you for your support and I hope you all enjoy! Take care!**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do I own Survivor.

16 Duelists started on the Island…

_(Cameras shows all the Duelists that were on the Island, each with X's across their pictures, except for Yugi and Joey's. Rex is flipping off the camera.)_

**But now it all comes down to two…**

(Shows Yugi and Joey facing each other in one of those split screen shots)

**Find out the winner on the conclusion of…**

**Survivor! Outwit, Outplay, Outlast! Duelist Style!**

A large group of people are in a movie theater. The crappy Movietunes (or whatever the hell that is) music has finally ended and the coming attractions are showing. Finally, one particular commercial came on… Which shows Yami Yugi in a field like area… (think of the Sogen card!)

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen! This is your friend, Yugi, reminding you to watch the final episode of Survivor this week! It's sure to be a blast when I battle it out with my best friend Joey Wheeler to find out who the true Survivor is… of course we all know who that will be… just look at the name of the show! So yeah, Survivor! Duelist Style! This week at 8pm! And now, your regularly scheduled movie!"

Suddenly, a stage hand comes on stage and whispers something in Yami's ear.

"Oh (**EXPLETIVE DELETED)** NO! If you think I'm doing that, your out your (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **MIND!" Yami shouted.

"But Yugi… we are interrupting their movie time… plus this was part of the agreement."

"OH SON OF A (**EXPLETIVE DELETED)! **FINE! I SWEAR THE (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) ** THINGS I DO FOR THESE (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **(**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **PEOPLE! THEY NEED TO GET UP FROM THAT (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **COUCH AND GET A (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **(**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **(**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **LIFE!" Yami angrily shouted as he put on a top hat and a tuxedo.

"You (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **Ready!" Yami said. Soon, men dressed up as a cup of soda, a bag of popcorn, a hot dog, a candy bar, and a cup of nachos came on the camera.

"All together now!"

Yami and the men in the food costumes began doing a little walking dance, singing:

"_**Let's go out to the snack bar! Lets go out to the snack bar! Let's go out to the snack bar, and have ourselves a snack!"**_

They all stopped in front of a concession stand… a concession stand in the middle of a field. Yami turned and smiled at the cameras.

"The movies are always better with popcorn, a drink, and Sour Patch Kids! So don't forget to visit the concession stand before the movie starts for a wide selection of foods!

Yami continued smiling at the cameras for a minute, then stopped.

"Are we done? GOOD! (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **(**EXPLETIVE DELETED) ** promotional videos! I'm pretty sure those fat (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **are gonna visit that damn concession stand!"

And soon, The movie started! Rather than being mad about Yami's foul mouth, the entire audience was laughing the whole time.

The Survivor producer sat at the back of the theater. "That whole thing took 150 takes… and THAT was the best one!"

**Location : Destiny Island : 11:34am**

Joey was having a huge fish breakfast, until he was interrupted by Jeff.

"Hey Joey! You're susposed to do a promotional commercial! Yugi already did his! Where's yours?" Jeff asked.

"Awww, get the dick out of ya ass, Probst! I didn't do a commercial. I did a music video." Joey responded.

"… Excuse me?" Jeff said.

"Yeah. My promotion is a music video!" Joey said.

"NO! I MEAN I DO NOT HAVE A DICK IN MY ASS!" Jeff shouted.

"Whateva." Joey said.

"Anyways, YOU did a music video… about Survivor?" Jeff said.

"Yes… and no… well… mostly no…" Joey responded.

"Oh son of a… do I DARE ask what you did?" Jeff moaned.

Joey pulled out a small TV, then turned it on.

"_You're watching M.T.V.!" Came the voice on the T.V._

Jeff slapped his forehead. "JOEY, YOU DIDN'T!"

"SHHH!" Joey said.

"_And now, the newest video from Kanye West… featuring Joey Wheeler!"_

Jeff shook his head in disbelief.

The video came on the T.V. starting out with Joey. He bagan to sing:

She take my money when I'm in need  
Yea she's a trifflin friend indeed  
Oh she's a gold digga way over town  
That dig's on me

The next scene showed Joey dancing next to Kanye West… now to make this funny, Imagine Joey Wheeler… dancing to hip hop music.

**(The parts where Joey sings are in parenthesis… like these ( ), and the ones without is Kanye.)**

_(She takes my money)  
Now I aint sayin she a gold digger (When I'm Need)  
But she aint messin wit no broke_ (**EXPLETIVE DELETED)**  
_(She takes my money)  
Now I aint sayin she a gold digger (When I'm need)  
but she aint messin wit no broke_ (**EXPLETIVE DELETED) **  
_get down girl gone head get down (I gotta leave)  
get down girl gone head get down (I gotta leave)  
get down girl gone head get down (I gotta leave)  
get down girl gone head_

Jeff suddenly turned the T.V. off. "Wheeler, this time you've gone too far." He said.

"HEY TURN THAT SHIT BACK ON!" Joey shouted. "THIS VIDEO IS THE BOMB-DIZZY"

Jeff shook his head. "Just one more day of this shit, Jeff… just one more fuckin day…"

**Location : Destiny Island : Beach : 3:00pm**

Yami and Joey stood on the beach with Jeff. They all looked out into the ocean.

Jeff sighed. "Well guys… this is it… We've had some good times on this show… and some bad ones… most of them bad…"

_Flashback…_

**Episode 1 : And So It Begins**

_Yami Yugi leans forward and turns to his team. "Does everybody remember the special Pootietang Strategy?" Each member of the Pootietang tribe nodded their heads with huge smirks on their faces. Yami Yugi then looked at Kaiba with his trademark clever smirk. Kaiba however just cocked his eyebrow. "Special Pootietang Strategy? I don't know what kind of lame ass strategy he came up with in that feeble little brain of his, but there's NO WAY it'll stand up to my Blue-Eyes White Dragon!"_

"_DUEL!"_

_Odion draws. "I SUMMON MYSTICAL BEAST SERKET!"_

_Marik draws. "I SUMMON THE WINGED DRAGON OF…"_

_Jeff runs up to Marik and slaps the God Card out of his hand. "Eygptian God Cards are strictly forbidden in this Challenge! Marik stamped his foot in the sand. "ARE YOU FUCKIN' KIDDIN' ME? WHAT THE HELL KIND OF GAY ASS DUEL IS THIS?" Jeff turned and walked away, completely ignoring Marik. "Continue the challenge!" Marik pulls out his Millennium Rod. "I should take control of your mind and have you cut your own friggin nuts off!" He put his rod away and draws his card. "I FUCKIN' SUMMON REVIVAL JAM!"_

_Bonz draws. "I SUMMON SNAKE HAIR!""_

_Weevil draws. "I SUMMON INSECT QUEEN!"_

_Rex draws. "I SUMMON TWO-HEADED KING REX!"_

_Pegasus draws. "I SUMMON BLUE-EYES TOON DRA—"_

_Kaiba interrupts him in mid-summon. "OH THE DAMN YOU ARE! YOU BETTER PUT THAT SHIT BACK BEFORE I SHOVE MY FOUR HUNDRED DOLLAR BOOT UP YOUR ASS!" Pegasus turns to Kabia. "You promise?" he said, smiling. Kaiba simply shook his head, giving him a cold stare. "Very well… you win Kaiba-boy. I SUMMON RELINQUISHED!" Rex shook his head. "You created this shit and THAT'S the best you can come up with?"_

_Mokuba draws. "I SUMMON THREE-HEADED GEEDO!"_

_Kaiba draws. "AND I SUMMON THE BLUE-EYES WHITE DRAGON!"_

_Jeff stared at the army of duel monsters. "WHAT AN ARMY? HOW WILL THE POOTIETANG TRIBE RETAILIATE!"_

_Mako draws. "I SUMMON LEGENDARY FISHERMAN!"_

_Mai draws. "I SUMMON HARPY'S PET DRAGON!"_

_Duke draws. "I SUMMON ORGOTH THE RELENTLESS!"_

_Bakura draws. "I SUMMON RIGHT LEG OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!" _

_Tea draws. "I SUMMON RIGHT ARM OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"_

_Tristan draws. "I SUMMON LEFT LEG OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"_

_Joey draws. "I SUMMON LEFT ARM OF THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"_

_Yugi draws. "AND I SUMMON EXODIA… THE FORBIDDEN ONE!"_

_Kaiba's eyes widened. "NO WAY! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKIN KIDDING ME!" Yugi pointed towards the Gazonga Tribe._

"_EXODIA… OBLITERATE!"_

_And with that, Exodia shot out a huge beam, completely destroying all the Gazonga Tribe's monsters and sending each member flying completely off camera. Jeff stared at the scene in total amazement._

"_Uhh….. THE POOTIETANG TRIBE WINS THE IMMUNITY CHALLENGE!"_

_Each team member hooted and hollered as they celebrated their victory. Jeft was then seen hauling ass towards where the Gazonga Tribe landed. "Ok Gazongas, meet back at the campsite for a tribal meeting to decided who gets voted off." Kaiba got up, pissed off. "Yugi.. one of these days, I am going to fuck you up… just really FUCK YOU UP!" Odion was still face down in the dirt. "Medic…"_

_**Scene shifts…**_

**Episode 4 : Sabotage!**

_Jeff is interrogating Yugi. Jeff is pacing around the hut with Yugi sitting on a log with his legs crossed, cool as a cucumber._

**Jeff: **Ok Yugi! Be honest… did you and your tribe trash the Gazonga Mansion?

**Yami Yugi: **_(a fake, innocent look on his face_) Jeff! I would NEVER do a thing like that! Sure, me and Kaiba have had our differences, but I can assure you that me and my tribe had NOTHING to do with the whole spray paint and limo being keyed incident.

**Jeff: **Hmmm… that's odd… because I never mentioned the spray paint… the limo being keyed.

**Yami Yugi: **… shit… _(quickly holds up the Millennium Puzzle)_ This bad boy gives me the ability to see what goes on around this island. So I know all about what happened to the Gazonga Mansion!

**Jeff: **funny… doesn't the Millennium Necklace gives the user that abili…

_Yugi reaches into his back pocket and quickly whipped out the Millennium Necklace and flashed it in front of Jeff's face._

**Jeff: **ok… well that still doesn't explain the fact that "Pootietang Rules" was tagged on the side of the house.

_An empty can of spray paint suddenly rolled out from under Yugi's bed, but he quickly shoved it back under with his foot._

**Yami Yugi: **… fuck this shit… I'm outta here!

_The Millenium Puzzle flashed, and young Yugi was standing there._

**Yugi: **It was all Duke! He wanted to mess with Kaiba's head! He was the one who tripped the wire!

**Jeff: **ok, thank you Yugi. I knew your honesty would get the best of you.

_As Jeff left the hut, Yami Yugi's transparent image appeared next to Yugi._

**Yami Yugi: **You know… you probably just fucked Duke over

**Yugi: **So? He shouldn't be such a stupid bitch.

**Episode 6: Vital Idol**

_High in a tree, Kaiba was dressed in camaflauged clothing and wore the camaflauged face paint. He was holding a sniper rifle and was shooting at Yugi throughout his performance!_

**Kaiba: **Fuckin bitch! Why don't you stay still?

_Kaiba looked through the scope to see that Yugi was nowhere in sight. _

**Kaiba: **Son of a motherless bitch! Where the fuck did he go this time!

_He caught a glimpse of Noah in the scope. A HUGE, evil smile shot across his face._

**Kaiba: **SOMEBODY IS FUCKIN EATIN LEAD TONIGHT!

_Back on the stage…_

**Jeff: **Ladies, now its time for you to pick the winner! Give it up for… the Gazonga Tribe!

_The fan girls go crazy with applauds and shouts_

**Jeff: **and now, give it up for… The Pootietang tribe!

_The fan girls go crazy with applauds and shouts once again. However, a huge bullet whizzed by and caught Noah right in the head! He feel down dead. Everyone gasped._

**Joey: **OH MY GOD! THEY KILLED NOAH!

**Tristan: **YOU BASTARDS!

**Jeff: **Only one person could have done this… KAIBA!

_Kaiba hid in the tree._

**Jeff: **Sorry Gazongas, but because your team captain killed a member of the opposite team… THE POOTIETANG TRIBE WINS THE IMMUNITY!

_The fan girls blow up as the sounds of cheering and shouting is heard throughout Destiny Island._

**Rex: **OH MY GOD! THAT'S BULLSHIT!

**Mokuba: **Yeah, you have no proof that my brother did this!

_Jeff took out a pair of tongs, then turned Noah's dead body over, and pulled the bullet out of his head. He took out a rag and wiped the blood off the bullet to reveal a Kaiba Corp. Logo on the bullet._

**Mokuba: **_(sighing) _Never mind…

**Scene shifts back to Jeff, Yami, and Joey.**

"Yeah… those were some good times!" Joey laughed.

"It's a damn shame it has to end today." Yami said.

"Hallelujah day…" Jeff said.

"Oh shut up, Probst! Don't act like you didn't have fun with us!" Joey said.

_Flashback…_

**Episode 13 : New Year's Rockin' Eve**

The Pootiezongas and Jeff were hungover. They could barely stand up straight.

"Well… that was one hell of a New Years huh?" Jeff asked.

"Jeff… why cant you be cool like that all the time?" Joey asked.

"Because this wouldn't be Survivor, now would it?" Jeff said. "Now I know its early… but I'm so fuckin hungover its not even funny… so lets get this Tribal Council out the way to I can go back to bed…"

Rex held a gun to his head.

"Rex! What the hell are you doing!" Marik said.

"I fuckin made out with Bernadette… Ever since that damn ball dropped, AND the whole way home! I want to be put out of my fuckin misery…"

"But you finally had sex last night, man…!"

Rex lowered the gun. "Good point."

**End**

"Ok… so there were a FEW good times with you guys." Jeff said. "But dammit Yugi! You and Kaiba drove me up the wall!"

Yami looked away and up into the sky. "Whatever could you mean?" He said innocently.

_Flashback…_

**Episode 5 : Rumble in the Jungle**

_**Yami Yugi: **That's a fuckin automobile!_

_At the EXACT moment Yami Yugi spoke, he whipped around and saw a camoflauge colored 2003 Safari Nissan Jeep tear out of the brush and was heading straight toward him! Yami Yugi dove out of the way just in the nick of time as the Jeep ALMOST clipped him! The person driving the Jeep was… guess! Come on, I think we all know who that is! Yep! It was Espa Roba! PSYCHE! It was Seto Kaiba! Kaiba looked in his rear view mirror to see Yami stagger to his feet. _

_**Kaiba: **Oh no the fuck your not! You aren't getting off the hook that easy you shit stain!_

_Kaiba pulled the parking brake and frantically turned the wheel, making the Jeep do 3 or 4 sets of donuts til it was facing Yami again. He released the brake and took off at Yami again with the speedometer going up at a fast rate. _

_**Yami Yugi: **(shaking his head) KAIBA! YOU BASTARD! HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?_

_Again, Yami dove out of the way, just in the nick of time. Kaiba let out a battle cry the whole time as he tried to run Yami over. Each time he missed, he used his donut technique until he was perfectly aligned with Yami, then took off after him again. Kaiba rolled down his window on the 4th attempt._

_**Kaiba: **I told you I was gonna kill your ass, didn't I Yugi! What do you think of my Destruction Derby of Doom!_

_**Yami Yugi: **YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU WANNA TAKE THIS SHIT UP A LEVEL?_

_**Kaiba: **YES I DO, ASS FACE!_

_Kaiba repeated his donut tactic, but instead of aligning himself with Yami, he kept driving, then flipped a bitch (that's a U-turn for those of you who don't know the lingo) and drove at Yamii. This time, he rolled down his window and pointed a gun at him and began firing like crazy! Yami ran as fast as he could, diving every other step to dodge bullets AND and a crazed Jeep. Yami, starting to get tired, jumped into the bushes for safety._

_**Kaiba: **NO YOU DON'T BITCH! YOU ARENT GETTING AWAY THAT EASILY!_

_Kaiba turned on some special X-Ray headlights, which allowed him to look through the bushes and trees! He saw Yami, crotched behind a boulder._

_**Kaiba: **Your mine you goat rapist!_

_The Jeep took off into the bushes, mowing shit down as it went through. Yami waited til Kaiba was good and close enough, then, when the time was right, nimbily climbed up a tree, then dived down on Kaiba's jeep, holding 2 giant tree branches with sharp pointed in the end. Yami landed hard on the hood of the jeep as he drove the sharp points of the tree brances into it. The hood started to smoke. Kaiba was turning the steering wheel like a mad man, trying to shake Yugi off. _

_**Kaiba: **Get your kamikaze ass off my car so I can run your bitch ass over!_

**_Yami Yugi: (pointing his middle finger up at Kaiba)_**

_Yami waited til the car was just about back in the middle of the dirt field, when he pulled out some dynamite (where he got dynamite from is beyond me), pulled out one of the tree branches, lit the dynamite fuse, and dropped it into the hole. Kaiba shook his head in disgust as he saw what Yami did. _

_**Kaiba: **WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!_

_Kaiba took off his seatbelt, opened the car door, and jumped out and defensively rolled on the ground. Yami Yugi did the same as he let of of the remaining tree branch. Both Yami and Kaiba ran like their lives depended on it (which it DID) as the Jeep drove into the middle of the field made an explosion so big it damn there rocked Destiny Island!_

**Episode 15 : Win, Lose, or Drop!**

_In one of the trailors on at the CBS Campsite, Jeff tapped his fingers on the desk he was sitting at. He had a disgruntled look on his face as the explosion finally cleared the sky, followed by a burned helicopter dropping to the island._

"_Two more days… just TWO MORE DAYS of this bullshit and I can go home!" he said. "What the fuck are they gonna do next, blow up half the island!"_

_Suddenly, a stagehand busted into Jeff's trailor. "Mr. Probst! Were not sure how it happened, but there's a a giant chunk of the island missing!"_

_Jeff slapped his forehead. "Just… get…out!"_

**END**

"… Hey, he started it." Yami said.

"Well anyways… that's enough for our trip down memory lane. Now it's time for your final Immunity Challenge! This one will decide who the King of Survivor is!" Jeff announced.

"Yeah! The King of Games, BIATCH!" Yami said.

"Dream on!" Joey said.

"And now, your final challenge!" Jeff said. A pick-up truck backed onto the beach and dropped off two large model kits. Then it drove back into the jungle.

"Inside those boxes are two model kits for real life speed boats! Your challenge… put those boats together, then drive the millions of miles BACK to Domino Pier…"

The scene suddenly shifts to Domino Pier, where tons of people where standing and cheering. There was a huge banner that was hung that read, "Survivor! Duelist Style!" and among those people were all the Duelists that were voted off the island. Rex was deparately looking for the REAL Bernadette. The whole area looked like the finish line of a big boat race.

"… Where the winner will be crowned the ultimate survivor! And you will also get that treasure trove of rare cards, AND the 3 million dollars!" Jeff announced. He then turned to the cameras. "Where the audience at the pier is watching live via satellite! These model kits are brought to us by the Kame Game Store… for your entertainment needs, who better to satisfy your urges than Grandpa Muto!" Jeff then turned away from the cameras. "That just sounds SO WRONG!"

Yami and Joey looked at each other, then nodded. Jeff pulled out a hand gun and pointed it into the sky.

"SURVIVORS READY?" he shouted.

Yami and Joey crotched down on one knee with their hands in the sand, as if they were about to run a 100 Yard Dash.

Jeff fired the gun. "GO!"

Yami and Joey took off running towards the large boxes. They tore it open and dumped out all the parts and immediately went to work.

"This is MY time to shine, Pharaoh! Remember, I used to put these together all the time before I put the Millennium Puzzle together!" little Yugi said.

"OOHH yeah… I forgot how big of a nerd you used to be before I came along. Now look at all the damn friends you got."

"YOU KNOW WHAT! FUCK YOU! PUT THAT DAMN KIT TOGETHER YOURSELF!" Yugi shouted from the puzzle.

"Come on, don't be like that. You KNOW I was just playin'!" Yami said.

"FUCK YOU!"

"Fine! I don't need you anyawys! I can put this shit together myself!" Yami said. 10 minutes past, and Yami has gotten nowhere, he furiously tossed the pieces around.

"GOD DAMMIT! HOW DO YOU PUT THIS SHIT TOGETHER!" Yami shouted. Little Yugi's transparent image appeared next to him, with a huge grin on his face. Yami gave him an angered look. "Oh you are just LOVING this, aren't you!" he said.

"Damn straight!" Yugi responded.

Joey, however, was close to finishing. "Sweet! Now all I have to do is put the engine in and I'm off this bitch! See you at the finish line, Yuge!" Joey dragged his speed boat towards a wagon. His boat was blue with a picture of the Flame Swordsman on the front. The back was a little decal of a hand flipping the bird.

"DAMMIT!" Yami shouted. "Joey's gonna beat us! I haven't even gotten a piece put together!" He then turned to Little Yugi.

"I am SO sorry! If it makes you feel any better, if it weren't for you, I would still be stuck in that puzzle." Yami said.

"Say it. You know what I wanna hear." Yugi responded.

"Oh fuck no."

"Then enjoy second place!"

"… I hate you…" Yami said in a mono tone. "Yugi… I'm nothing without you. You're Michael Jackson, I'm Tito…"

Yugi began to bust up laughing! "OK! OK! YOU'VE SUFFERED ENOUGH! HAHAHAHA!"

"…Monkey bitch…" Yami muttered as the Millennium Puzzle flashed. Little Yugi went straight to work as he quickly assembled his speed boat. His boat was red with a picture of the Dark Magician on the front, and the back had a licence plate that said, "PIMP JUICE".

"Quickly! NOW WE HAVE TO GET THIS TO THE WATER, THEN PUT THE ENGINE INSIDE!" Yami shouted from the puzzle.

"NO REALLY! YA THINK!" Yugi said back. Yami slapped Yugi upside his head, then they both put their speed boat onto their wagon and quickly wheeled it out to the ocean, where their engine and Joey was waiting.

"See you at the finish line, bitches!" Joey shouted as he sped off into the ocean.

"FUCK!" Yami said. "PUT THAT SHIT IN THERE! HURRY!" Yugi tried to get the engine, but was too weak to get it.

"Um… little help?" Yugi asked.

Yami shook his head. "Weak ass bitch…"

The two duelists grabbed the engine and walked it over to the speed boat, where Yami quickly opened the top and the dropped it inside. Yugi hooked up all the necessary parts. Yami started the boat.

"It worked! Get your little ass back in the puzzle!" Yami shouted.

"WHAT? NO! I WANNA DRIVE!" Yugi said.

Yami snapped. He jumped out the boat and grabbed Yugi by his collar. "NOW LISTEN TO ME YOU LITTLE FUCK… I'VE PUT UP WITH YOUR BITCHING… YOUR DEMANDS… AND I'M FUCKIN' SICK OF IT! I AM TRYING TO WIN THIS SHIT, AND JOEY HAS A BIG ASS LEAD OVER US ALL THANKS TO YOUR DAMN IMMATURITY! NOW YOU GET YOUR ASS BACK IN THAT PUZZLE, AND IF I HEAR SO MUCH AS A PEEP OUT OF YOU, I'M GOING TO SHOVE MY FOOT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS, THE WATER IN MY KNEE WILL QUINCH YOUR THRIST!"

A tear rolled down Yugi's cheek. "You… YOU YELLED AT ME!"

"DAMMIT!"

Yami grabbed the Millennium Puzzle, where it somehow sucked Yugi back inside. He quickly jumped into the boat and took off into the ocean. He hydroplaned furiously, trying to catch up to Joey.

"OF ALL THE HIKARIS IN THIS DAMN WORLD, I GET STUCK WITH THIS MOTHER FUCKER!"

Meanwhile, up ahead, Joey, thinking he had a huge lead, decided to stop for a snack. He ate all the left over snacks that the CBS executives didn't eat.

"You know… this scenery is nice." He said. "Reminds me of when I went to Duelist Kingdom… You know, maybe I…"

Yami finally caught up to him. He stopped right next to Joey, flipped him off, then stepped on the gas and speed ahead, splashing Joey with the water from the sudden take off.

"SON OF AN ASS!" Joey shouted!

Joey quickly started his speed boat up and shot off ahead. He quickly caught up to Yami, then stood up and grabbed his crotch.

"SUCK IT BITCH!"

Then Joey hit the nitros on his boat and shot off ahead again. Yami pounded the dashboard of his boat.

"JOEY YOU FUCKIN' WHORE!" he shouted.

Yami did the same, and soon, the two were neck in neck in a fierce battle back to Domino Pier. They were ramming each other, cussing at each other the whole way. Joey actually succeeded in reaching over and slapping Yami in the face. Yami, however, returned the favor by hocking a loogie at Joey's face. That really heated the race up. The audience at Domino Pier were on their feet from the race, cheering like crazy. The special guests that helped the Duelists rid them of their Pokemon problem were even seen cheering! Yugi and Joey chants were heard far and wide. It truly was a heated race… until a dark shadow loomed over the horizon. Yami stopped his boat. Joey stopped, then backed up.

"Hey Yugi! What the hell, man!" Joey said.

"… Trouble!" Yami said in all seriousness.

The shadow got bigger, and bigger. Yami and Joey watched as something came into view. In the sky, a large airship appeared over the horizon. It was huge, made of metal, and had weapons all over it. On the side of the ship, the words "BATTLESHIP DEATHSTRIKE" was embedded on the sides. There were also a couple of loud speakers around the ship as well.

"MWA HA HA HA HAHA HAHA!" came a laugh from the speakers

Yami's eyes lit up. "KAIBA!"

Joey quickly looked at Yami. "THAT'S RICH BOY UP THERE!"

"Yugi! THIS IS IT YOU BASTARD! YOU DIE TODAY!" Kaiba said from the speakers.

Inside the ship, Kaiba sat at the main control panel, along with his military intelligence and Mokuba were running around keeping the ship in tact.

"This is it…" Kaiba said. "Everything that's ever happened in my life has lead to THIS moment! And this time… there is NO way Yugi is gonna luck his way out of this one! I spared NO expense to my airship of revenge!" Kaiba then turned to the monitor.

"THAT'S RIGHT YUGI! I HOPE YOUR READY FOR YOUR DEMISE, YOU SON OF A BITCH! BECAUSE TODAY IS THE DAY YOU DIE! HAHAHAHAHAAHA!"

Mokuba shook his head as he watched Kaiba. "Uh… bro… the microphone…"

Kaiba quickly looked at Mokuba. "Shut up! I'm still figuring this shit out!" He then grabbed the microphone and tapped on the top.

"Is this thing on?" he said. "Testing… testing… 1… 2… 3…" He cleared his throat. "Yugi! I've put every weapon I can think of on this bad boy! Theres NO WAY You can escape your death now!"

Yami flipped off the large battleship.

"GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE, KAIBA! YOU KNOW YOU CANT BEAT YUGI, YOU THIRD PLACE BITCH!" Joey shouted.

"Third? Who's first and second?" Yami asked.

"Simple! You're second… I'm first!" Joey said.

"YOU KNOW WHAT?" Kaiba shouted. "WHY DON'T I DEMONSTRATE THE POWER OF THIS BITCH… ON YOU, WHEELER!"

"Huh?" Joey said.

Suddenly, the bottom of the airship opened, and a large bomb appeared. On this bomb were the words, "BIG F'CKIN' NUKE".

A female voice was heard over the loud speakers. _"Dropping BIG FUCKIN' NUKE IN T MINUS 5... 4… 3… 2… 1… "_

The nuke dropped and began its 350 foot drop towards the ocean. Yami quickly started his boat and rammed Joey. The impact sent the two of them careening in different directions. The nuke hit the water and exploded, sending Joey flying completely off camera.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, JOEY WILL RETUUUUUUUUUUUUURN!"

"Damn…" Kaiba said. He quickly ran to his computer. "SCAN FOR THE ASSHOLE!" he said to it.

"_Scanning: Yugi Muto… target found… coordinates 10-444-30"_

"That's right over there, bro!" Mokuba said.

The battleship turned around and flew a couple feet, til it was right by Yami, who was panting from the impact. He quickly looked up at Kaiba.

"KAIBA! YOU JACKASS! IF YOU HAVE A BEEF WITH ME, YOU KEEP IT WITH ME! YOU LEAVE MY FRIENDS OUT OF THIS!" Yami shouted.

"OH PLEASE!" Kaiba said over the loud speaker. "I DID YOU A FAVOR GETTING RID OF THAT DUMBASS! AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME!"

Yami held up the Millennium Puzzle. "TIME TO BRING YOUR BITCH ASS DOWN! MILLENNIUM BLAZE!"

An energy beam shout of the center of the Millennium Puzzle and hit the battleship dead on, but nothing happened.

"WHAT!" Yami gasped.

"DID I MENTION THIS BATTLESHIP IS MADE OUT OF KITCHIM… THE HARDEST METAL IN THE UNIVERSE!" Kaiba laughed.

"TCH!" Yugi hissed.

"NOW WHATCHA GONNA DO, BITCH!" Kaiba laughed. "WELL… IVE SEEN YOU SQUIRM LONG ENOUGH… NOW ITS TIME TO PUT YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY! IT'S TIME TO KILL YOU!"

"You may be able to shield yourself from my attacks, but you'll never hurt me with your weaponry!" Yami shouted. A gold shield surrounded him.

"FIRE!" Kaiba shouted.

A dozen guns suddenly pointed downwards at Yami, then took fire. The bullets pierced through the shield, but luckily for Yami, every last one of them missed.

Yami's eyes widened. "WHAT! HOW DID THEY PENETRATE MY SHIELD!"

"OH SHIT! I ALSO FORGOT TO TELL YOU THAT THOSE BULLETS ARE MADE FROM ORICHALCOS STONES! I COULD HAVE HIT YOU DEAD ON, BUT I WANTED YOU TO SHIT YOURSELF FIRST!" Kaiba laughed.

"Oh no…" Yami said.

"FIRE! FIRE EVERY FUCKIN WEAPON!" Kaiba shouted. And with that, every single weapon that was on Battleship Deathstrike fired. Nukes dropped. Bullets shot. Lasers fired. And they all hit, resulting in a HUGE explosion! When the smoke cleared, the only thing that remained were a few pieces of Yami's speedboat and shards of his blue jacket.

Kaiba watched the scene with tears in his eyes. "Computer… Run a quick scan for Yugi…"

"_Scanning… scan complete. Target obliterated."_

Kaiba stood up, then dropped to his knees. "I did it… I did it… I FUCKIN' DID IT! YES! FUCK YES! I FINALLY KILLED YUGI!"

Suddenly, confetti dropped from out of nowhere as Kaiba, Mokuba, and his military advisors began to celebrate. Mokuba popped a bottle of champagne and began spraying it all over Kaiba and a few men.

Kaiba began clapping to get everyone's attention. "I just wanted to say… you know what? You plan and plan and plan for this day for SO LONG! Then when it finally comes… you have no idea what to say! I LOVE YOU GUYS!" And with that, the celebration continued. As the party continued, a small vibration was felt.

"Hey bro! did you feel something?" Mokuba asked. Kaiba was busy chugging down a bottle of champagne. "Huh? Nah, its probably because the men are being too rowdy. HEY! YOU GUYS COOL IT A LITTLE! AWWW WHAT THE FUCK! BE AS CRAZY AS YOU WANT! NOT LIKE WE CAN GET SHOT DOWN! MWA HAHAHAHAHA!"

More and More little vibrations were felt, some of them bigger than the last.

"_DANGER! DANGER! INTRUDER LOCATED IN THE VICINITY! DESTROYING MAIN COMPARTMENTS!"_

Kaiba suddenly spit champagne all over Roland.

"WHAT THE HELL! WHAT THE DAMN! WHAT THE FUCK? WHAT THE PISS!" he shouted. "COMPUTER! BRING THAT INTRUDER UP ON THE MONITOR! RIGHT NOW!" He held tightly onto his bottle of champagne. "I swear to god if that's Yugi I'm gonna open up the BIGGEST can of whoop ass!"

A monitor dropped down and began to show an image. Sure enough, it was Yami Yugi destroying EVERYTHING in his path, along with all his Duel Monsters that were brought to life with his shadow powers. Kaiba quickly ran to grab the microphone.

"YUGI YOU BASTARD! I'M WATCHING YOU! KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF! YOU'RE GONNA KILL US ALL!"

Yami looked at the nearest surveillance camera, flipped it off, then grabbed a bat and took a swing at it. There was nothing but snow on the camera.

"SHIT!" Kaiba shouted as he threw down the microphone.

"IF THIS THING EXPLODES, IT'LL EXPLODE FROM THE INSIDE! WE'LL ALL BE REDUCED TO NOTHING!" one of the advisors shouted.

"ABANDON SHIP!" Mokuba shouted.

All the advisors, lead by Mokuba, began to run towards the doors, grabbed a parachute backpack, and jumped out. A dozen men, and Mokuba, could be seen safely floating down from the airship. A KaibaCorp rescue boat suddenly appeared, caught every last one of them, then drove away.

"PUSSIES! YOU PUSSIES!" Kaiba shouted.

"_Warning! Self destruct sequence activated. Will explode in 20 seconds."_

Kaiba quickly ran to a ladder, on the top of the Battleship. Once at the top, Kaiba found that Yami was already out there.

Nothing was said. They both just stared each other down. The explosion finally occurred, dropping the battleship all the way down to the ocean. Since the airship was made from the hardest metal in the galaxy and was melded so tightly together, the ship didn't fall apart. It finally hit the ocean and resulted in a large large wave.

**(This scene, imagine the theme to Mortal Kombat is playing. You know, the techno mix from the first movie)**

Yami took off his Millennium Puzzle and his Duel Disk and sit it down next to him. Kaiba took off his long white jacket and his Duel Disk and sit it down next to him as well. Once the song said, "FIGHT!", Yami and Kaiba charged at each other! They began exchanging punch and kicks for like 10 minutes. They both stopped, panting. Yami held his side, while Kaiba rubbed his cheek. Both of them still staring at each other. Without warning, they began going at it again, still fighting, with no one to stop them!

The audience at Domino Pier were alive with rants and raves and cheers as Yugi and Kaiba continued their death match. Kaiba kneed Yami in the stomach. Yami quickly retailiated by punching Kaiba in the face. The fight continued, getting brutal by the minute. Both Duelist were turning black and blue with bruises and blood starting to flow.

Suddenly, the coast guard could be scene speeding towards the fallen battleship.

"SHIT!" Yugi said. He waited for his moment, then once Kaiba went to throw a punch, Yami grabbed his fist and threw Kaiba into the ocean.

"WE'LL FINISH THIS LATER, BITCH! I'M NOT TRYIN TO GO TO JAIL OVER YOUR ASS!" Yami shouted.

He jumped into the water, found an emergency lifeboat that was tossed out after the battleship went down, and it was a coincidence that it was a motor boat. Yami then jetted away before the coast guard can see them.

**(End of the song by the way)**

The Coast Guards began to look the battleship over. "Looks like we have to report this…" said one of them.

"Yeah… damn, and I was hoping we could watch some movies and save bitches… now it looks like we actually have to WORK today!" said another one.

As soon as the Coast Guards drove away, Kaiba's head emerged from the water. He stared down the area in which Yami drove off in. No cold threats. No vows for revenge. He kept staring.

Suddenly, Joey sped up, then stopped, slapped Kaiba upside his head, flipped him off, then shot off after Yami.

"I TOLD YOU JOEY WOULD RETURN, BIATCH!"

Kaiba was now SEETHING mad! "Just you wait Yugi… one day… some day… you will pay… with your life… AND YOU TOO, WHEELER! ILL BURY BOTH YOU BITCHES IN THE SAME FUCKIN' GRAVE! MWA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA!" He then got on his cell phone. "MOKUBA! COME PICK ME UP!"

**(If you were expecting some huge unexpected plotline like Duel Monster Frontier… I am SO sorry I let you down!)**

Yami's boat hauled ass across the finish line, with Joey in hot pursuit. Domino Pier came into view as Yami could see the finish line becoming more and more clear.

"THIS IS IT, PHAROAH! WE"RE GONNA WIN! WE'RE GONNA WIN!" Yugi cheered from the puzzle.

"Of course! Did you ever have any doubt! I mean, this is OUR show, remember?" Yami said with a huge shit-eating grin. "HEY WAIT, DIDN'T I TELL YOUR ASS NOT TO TALK!"

Joey was desparately trying to catch up to his best friend, but to no avail. "NO! I'VE GOTTA WIN THIS!" he said, as passionate as ever. It was no use. No matter how hard Joey tried, he couldn't pass Yugi!

"AND HERE THEY COME!" Jeff said at the pier, holding a microphone! "Yugi, now in a boat he stole from Kaiba, is coming closer and closer to the finish line! I don't think Joey can pass him now! IT LOOKS LIKE YUGI IS GOING TO WIN SURVIVOR!"

Suddenly, high in the air, a Kaiba Corp. Helicopter flew above Yami. Kaiba poked his head out the window. "MERRY CHRISTMAS, YOU BITCH-MADE BASTARD!" He pressed a button on a tiny remote control. There was a tiny explosion from Yami's boat. It started to smoke like crazy, then came to a complete stop.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED!" Yugi shouted from the puzzle.

"I DON'T FUCKIN' KNOW! STUPID PIECE OF KAIBA CORP SHIT!" Yami shouted as he started to pound the boat. Yami stopped just INCHES from the finish line. Suddenly, Joey came out of nowhere!

"NO YOU DON'T!" Yami shouted. He aimed his Millennium Puzzle, and the moment Joey sped past him, he shot the Millennium Blaze attack and blew up Joey's engine, stopping him short of the finish line! Joey flipped Yami off, then dove into the ocean and began swimming for dear life to the finish line.

The crowd was on their feet, cheering!

"NO!" Yami shouted. "I'M YUGI, GOD DAMMIT! DO YOU FUCKIN' HEAR ME!" He unfastened his seat belt, making an attempt to try to dive in the water after Joey, but Kaiba once again intervened.

"I DON'T THINK SO YOU WHORE!" Kaiba shouted from the air.

Suddenly, the seatbelts wrapped around Yami, trapping him inside the boat! "NO! FUCK YOU KAIBA YOU STUPID MOTHER FUCKER! FUCK YOU AND YOUR SLUTTY MOM!"

Joey continued to swim! He swam as if his life depended on it! He swam, and swam, and swam! Til finally, Jeff stood over him.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE A WINNER! JOEY WHEELER HAS WON SURVIVOR! JOEY WHEELER HAS WON SURVIVOR!

The crowd helped Joey out of the water, then held him up as confetti mysteriously dropped out of the sky. Joey held his fists up into the air. "I DID IT! I WON! I'M DA BOMB!" he shouted.

"I cannot believe that fool actually won…" Tristan said.

"… Me too…" Tea said.

"Pegasus cant believe it either!" Tristan said as he held up Pegasus' head.

"EEWWWW! WHY THE FUCK DO YOU STILL HAVE THAT NASTY ASS THING!" Tea shouted as she kicked the head into the water.

Yami, however, was uber pissed. He looked up at Kaiba's helicopter. "Kaiba… you fuckin' bitch… how dare you screw ME out of what was rightfully mine…"

Kaiba's voice came over the loudspeaker. "YEAH! HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES, BITCH! I GOT YOU BACK FOR EVERYTHING YOU'VE EVER DONE TO ME! SABOTAGING MY FUCKIN' PROPERTY! THAT YUGI'S BITCH T-SHIRT… TOUCHING MY FUCKIN' DECK… SHOOTING A BOTTLE ROCKET OFF IN MY ROOM! EVERYTHING! NOW YOU HAVE TO LIVE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE KNOWING YOU GOT FUCKIN' BEAT BY WHEELER OF ALL PEOPLE… AND SCREWED BY ME! HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! I TOLD YOU I WOULD GET YOUR MONKEY ASS BACK!"

And with that, the helicopter turned around and took off, dropping something down. It landed perfectly in front of Yami. The words, "KAIBA'S BITCH" were printed on a dark pink tshirt. Yami shook his head. "Kaiba… this time… YOURE THE ONE WHO'S GONNA FUCKIN DIE! YOU HEAR ME! YOURE DEAD YOU ASSHOLE!"

**Location : Domino Pier : 10: 48pm**

A huge awards ceremony was going on at the pier, as all the Duelists, sans Pegasus, Kaiba and Mokuba, were gathered around to honor Joey's win. Jeff stepped forward.

"Well Joey, the tribe has spoken! You are the survivor!" Jeff said. Joey began to raise the roof as the audience cheered and the Duelists clapped. Yami, however, was still pissed off.

"Yugi, fuckin' take over before I kill someone other than Kaiba!" he said.

"SURE!" Yugi shouted. The Millennium Puzzle flashed and Little Yugi stood there with the group. He patted Joey on the back as a sign of a good race.

"And now, for the moment you've all been waiting for! Your THREE MILLION DOLLARS!" Jeff said. The CBS crew carried a huge check for Three Million Dollars out towards the cameras.

"OH MY GOD!" Joey shouted with stars in his eyes and drool flowing down his mouth. He quickly ran over to his check and began posing with it as numerous pictures were taken.

Next, the crew brought out a giant treasure chest. Jeff walked over and handed Joey a key. "And now, your treasure chest full of rare cards!"

Joey took the key and ran over to his chest. He then turned to the other Duelists. "AFTER I OPEN THIS BAD BOY UP, I CHALLENGE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU BITCHES TO A DUEL!" he shouted.

Joey inserted the key into the keyhole and turned it, then propped open the chest. Joey's face suddenly went pail as he saw what was inside. He felt like someone punched him in the stomach. Finally, anger filled his body as he turned towards the cameras.

"PROBST! GET YOUR FAGGOT ASS OVER HERE! **NOW!**" He shouted angrily.

Jeff ran over towards him. "What seems to be the problem, Joe—" Joey quickly grabbed Jeff by his neck and threw him towards the chest.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BULLSHIT!" he shouted.

All the Duelists ran over to see what the commotion was about.

"Whats wrong, Joey?" Mai asked.

"LOOK AT THIS SHIT!" Joey shouted.

The other Duelists looked inside the chest and shook there heads in disbelief. Some even as pissed as Joey.

"IS THIS YOUR IDEA OF A FUCKIN' JOKE!" Marik shouted.

"THESE ARE FUCKIN' BASEBALL CARDS!" Odion shouted.

"SOME OF THESE ARE FUCKIN' POKEMON CARDS TOO!" Tristan said.

"HEY! THESE ARE MAGIC CARDS… AND NOT **OUR** MAGIC CARD! I MEAN MAGIC THE FUCKIN' GATHERING!"

"Look… Dragon Ball Z cards!" Bonz said.

"WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT! EXPLAIN!" Yami Bakura shouted.

"Hey… we said there were a treasure chest full of RARE cards… we didn't say NOTHIN about a treasure chest full of Duel Monster Cards…" Jeff said.

The Duelists all looked at Jeff with anger and fire in their eyes.

"So let me get this straight…" Duke Devlin said "We went through all that bullshit… got kidnapped by Pokemon trainers… and nearly killed ourselves… FOR A CHEST FULL OF CRAP CARDS!"

"HEY! THESE ARE RARE CARDS!" Jeff said, starting to back away.

"Probst… you have gone TOO far this time…" Mai said as she pulled out her twin desert eagles.

"I know you hate us, but fuckin' with us was the LAST thing you should have done!" Weevil said.

Rex ran up with a baseball bat full of nails. "LETS FUCK THESE CBS BITCH UP!" he shouted. "SHINANAGANS UP IN THIS BITCH!"

And with that, all the duelists pulled random weapons and began to chase down all the CBS executives! Jeff tripped in the process and was literally maimed by all the duelists.

Yugi and Joey stood there watching the carnage.

"Wow… do you think Jeff is dead, Joey?" Yugi asked.

"I really don't know, Yuge. But ill say this, if he's not, there's NO WAY he's gonna be walking the same again." Joey responded.

Mai pointed her desert eagles at Jeff's knee caps, then fired.

"Correction… he'll never WALK again." Joey said. They both began to laugh. "But you know something… Jeff was right. These cards are worth a lot of money! Lets go trade them in, then I'll give you half!"

"REALLY JOEY?"

"Sure! I mean, besides being a little pussy, you ARE my best friend! And besides, if it weren't for Kaiba, well… who knows who would have won!"

"Yeah, you're right! Lets go!"

And with that, Yugi and Joey walked away into the moonlight. They both dragged the chest full of cards, and Joey had his large million dollar check folded up under his arms. Behind them, The Duelists were all brutally beating the CBS network workers, with fire everywhere. It was like something out of that story, "The Crucible". And my friends… we close with a happy ending. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for supporting this story, because it was the first one I've ever written, and the first one I've ever finished!

**THE END!**

**(NOTE: Joey blows ALL his money a week later on food!)**

**And that's the end. I hope you enjoyed Survivor! Duelist Style! Be on the look out for my follow up story to this one!**

**COMING SOON: Survivor! Duelist Style GX! (Starring the cast from the new show Yu-Gi-Oh! GX!) NOT the follow up story, but a spin off.**


End file.
